Church is for losers.

Agnosticfelice · Post by **Agnosticfelice** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:33 pm

Who goes to church?

Pomp and circumstance ritual crap interrupts valuable bbq, tailgating and sitting in my underwear time. Why should I bother with this crap if I...

... am Catholic and can just confess my sins at the very end and get a free pass.
... am Baptist and can do whatever I want so long as I vote Republican.
... am Mormon and can do whatever I want so long as I wear the special underoos.
... am Muslim and can do whatever I want so long as I do it with dynamite strapped to my nards.
... am Wiccan and can do whatever I want so long as frumpy man-haters with bad posture are involved.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:36 pm

Church is for Altar Boys, please. Someone needs to ring the bells.

--Father NAMBLA

LL Cool J · Post by **LL Cool J** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:39 pm

PSUFAN wrote:Someone needs to ring the bells.

Can they be rocked?

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:43 pm

As long as they're not heard outside of the Sanctum.

BodyofChristfelice · Post by **BodyofChristfelice** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 7:19 pm

Don't be masticating me or dipping me in the nacho cheese.

And don't say "thanks" when I'm served up.

Uncle Jedfelice · Post by **Uncle Jedfelice** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 7:21 pm

Weeeeelll Doggies.

Jethro once ate 14 bowls of flakes and 3 packets of Body of Christ crackers.

One of these days I gotta have a long talk with that boy.

Grannyfelice · Post by **Grannyfelice** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 7:22 pm

I need that boy to take me back to Marineland so I kin catch one of them whales. Jethro, git my biggest bamboo pole.

BillBennettfelice · Post by **BillBennettfelice** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 7:38 pm

The lines at the casino buffet are so much shorter on Sunday mornings. I wonder why.

Gamblofelice · Post by **Gamblofelice** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 8:21 pm

Nickle slot tourneys.