Hey Fester ...

[RadioFan]

On the premise that it was after 5 p.m. in Europe, I bought a 12'er of Hamm's today.

Being that I'm off from work ... started tasting them about 3 p.m. CST. They get better "beer after beer," as the old Gettleman's commercial used to go. Know what I'm sayin'? Oklahoma 3.2 buzz ... check.

Have I spoiled my first Hamm's experience, in the middle of the day, by indulging in the necter of the Fester gods at 3.2 percent? Hey, it's all I can get here in OklaHammshatera.

More importantly, how, exactly, will my gf murder me, when she gets home?

I'd appreciate some solid, quick advice, as I don't have long to live.

Btw, Jim Nance is on TV, so I'm about to kill myself anyway, because my NCAA radio affiliate has got the ORU game and post-game crying on for what seems like hours.

Help me.

[PSUFAN]

Sorry for your loss(es).

[Bizzarofelice]

Jim Nance is on TV.

Not cool. Don't remind me that loser exists.

[Guest]

The key to enjoying the clean, refreshing taste of Hamm's is to drink it ice cold in a small glass. After you finish the can, follow it up with a chaser of your favorite beer/ale (Summit, Fuller's, etc.).

You won't believe how good the second beer tastes.

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Keep hope alive for the former regional American macros!

[Uncle Fester]

^^ That was me, by the way. ^^

Fester, Board Hammsologist.

[Guest]

Well, that's one way Fester, but a better way is to attach a long plastic tube to a large funnel.

Total capacity of funnel and tube should be approximately one six pack. Hold thumb at bottom of tube and fill the apparatus with the contents of a Hamms six-pack.

Place mouth at end of tube and release thumb. The beer will rush directly into your stomach, minimizing contact with taste buds as well as minimizing time to inebriation.