Easter Knobjobs

[Y2K]

You're married and still getting head?

No way...

I call bullshit.........




:P

[Screw_Michigan]

rack 88. getting up for 8 am mass on easter sunday or putting up with the four hour torture fest on holy saturday, pick your poison. both are horrible, so is catholicism. who knew?

war sleeping during the homily. a tradition like none other...

[RadioFan]

I'm not sure if the moral of the story was that 88's trombone got to playing crescendo high C notes on Holy Saturday night, or if 88 is in for a fun Easter Sunday night and/or both ...

But then again, I don't really care.

I just enjoy the hell out of 88's stories.

RACK

[Screw_Michigan]

i know, i was drunk. i just thought his story was funny.

[Van]

Great story as usual from 88 but I'm going to have to go out on a limb here and state a decidedly minority opinion...

Ie...

...not all blowjobs are worth the trouble.

Screw it. I've had enough sex in my life, I don't need it so badly that I'll take it under any circumstances. If the sex offerings from the woman aren't cuntfelt and passionate I'll kindly take a pass.

Getting back to 88's story, the last thing I'd want is my wife checking her watch and mentally going through her Easter Checklist as she's giving me Perfunctory Head while I, ummm, watch some NBA game...

:cool:

[pron]

Van you're usually all that and stuff, but ---



The worst sex I've ever had was still great. :D

[Van]

Pron, just guessing here and all but if the only BJs you ever get from your woman are of the hurried and bored-but-I-gotta-do-it-to-get-hubby-to-do-what-I-want variety then your idea of "great" and mine differ...greatly.

:-)

[The Seer]

Personally, I've found them disappointing over the past few years.

When me and Mrs. 88 first got married, I could be assured of a world glass knobber at some point during the Easter weekend. Invariably, Mrs. 88's mother would say or do something to piss Mrs. 88 off. Sometimes it involved religion, but usually it was some petty thing that neither of them could remember a week later. Back then, when Mrs. 88 was pissed at her mom, she'd take it upon herself to just get freaky in her mother's guest bedroom, where we would always be quartered. I think it in Mrs. 88's twisted mind, blowing me like a goddamn trombone was the equivalent to giving her mom the finger, which Mrs. 88 had absolutely no spine to do. Bummer, I win.

But after we had kids, Mrs. 88 and her mom bonded like freaking crazy glue. We'd still get quartered in the guest bedroom, but it wasn't the same. There was the anti-sex of any kind crib staring at the bed. Plus Mrs. 88 would go to bed in a good mood, which is not a mood that frequently featured large amounts of slobber on my knobber.

More recently, the in-laws have moved very close to the 88 manse. We don't have to cruise over there for the entire weekend anymore. We can drive over there in a relatively short trip, then come on home. This cuts down on Easter knobjob opportunities, at least in the in-laws casa. This sucks.

I mentioned this issue to Mrs. 88 this afternoon while simultaneously coaching Hot Stove League Baseball practice. Mrs. 88 was sympathetic, but only to a point. She appeared to grasp the issue, but was not enthusiastic about finding a solution to the problem. I decided that I needed an angle.

This evening, during dinner, Mrs. 88 mentioned that my twice annual appearance in the Catholic Church was due tomorrow at 8:00 a.m. (I am referred to as a C and E'er, which novices would recognize as "C"hristmas and "E"aster, but to trained Catholics means "C"hatechism and "E"ucharist or some such shit). I very clearly advised Mrs. 88 that I could not see myself appearing in the Catholic Church tomorrow unless the 88-knob has been polished with vigor. I think out of fear that her mother might see her alone with the 88-spawn in the Catholich Church on Easter Sunday, Mrs. 88 is presently pressing my Sunday finest.

Rack the EB.

Huh. All this time I thought you were a Heeb....

[campinfool]

Screw you 88. I got sucked into a 3 hour Easter Vigil last night and only came out of it with blue balls and an anger problem. :twisted:

[jtr]

88 was there hot sauce involved with your easter dinner tonight?

[patsy stone]

(I am referred to as a C and E'er, which novices would recognize as "C"hristmas and "E"aster, but to trained Catholics means "C"hatechism and "E"ucharist or some such shit).

I used to be a CEO — "Christmas and Easter Only."

[MiketheangrydrunkenCUfan]

I was a CEO for a while. Then I realized that it makes the "regulars" feel better about themselves to see all the CEOs show up twice a year.

Now I'm just a WAFOUTCWATSE (weddings and funerals only, unless they conflict with a televised sporting event).