A Rant About Cars

[Uncle Fester]

These things bug me:

1. The trend toward stick shifts in cars with automatic transmissions.

What the holy fooken hell. It's an automatic. You shift it from "P" into "D" and you're done. So why a giant clunky shifter on the floor or in the middle of the dash that looks like something out of Lemans? Is anybody fooled? Do you shift into drive and yell out "VRRROOM! VROOOM! and then make a sound like squeeling tires?

Mount the damn thing somewhere out of the way and give me back all the room these stupid things take up.

2. No leg room in the back.

What's the point of having a back seat if you don't have room to put your legs? I see this on wagons and even SUVs - giant tank-sized vehicles with about 2 inches of leg room in the back. Who am I hauling, anorexics?

3. Car reviews that complain about "too much plastic" in the interior.

I haven't seen any cars lately with interiors made out of platinum, black walnut, and solid gold. How can a car's interior be "too plasticky" when every fukking car in the world has a plastic interior?

4. Center-Mounted Gauges.

Whoever designed these damn things should be dragged behind a car while the driver cranes his neck and struggles to read the speedometer.


Fess, Feelin' Cranky

[PL]

I think they were better with Rick Ocasik. Todd rundgren blows.

[Screw_Michigan]

I think they were better with Rick Ocasik. Todd rundgren blows.

rack. RIP ben orr.

[Y2K]

The rented Dodge Grand Caravan I used had the Emergency Flasher activate every time the slider doors open..... :bigrolleyes:

[smackaholic]

These things bug me:

1. The trend toward stick shifts in cars with automatic transmissions.

What the holy fooken hell. It's an automatic. You shift it from "P" into "D" and you're done. So why a giant clunky shifter on the floor or in the middle of the dash that looks like something out of Lemans? Is anybody fooled? Do you shift into drive and yell out "VRRROOM! VROOOM! and then make a sound like squeeling tires?

Mount the damn thing somewhere out of the way and give me back all the room these stupid things take up.

what bugs me is the damn near extinction of proper manual trannies in sports cars. You can even get an auto in a fukking porsche 911. There should be an amendment or something against that. I don't care that auto trannies today are so fukking good that they can out perform a manual. You buy a fukking sports car for the driving experience. Part of that is shifting.

2. No leg room in the back.

What's the point of having a back seat if you don't have room to put your legs? I see this on wagons and even SUVs - giant tank-sized vehicles with about 2 inches of leg room in the back. Who am I hauling, anorexics?

don't worry grampa, they still make crown vics with enough backseat for shutyomouth and kcwhatshisname, the fat guy, to reenact a brokeback mounting scene. And it's even got a column auto that don't need manual shifting. This and that bench seat comes in kinda handy when you wanna get a bj rolling down the interstate.

3. Car reviews that complain about "too much plastic" in the interior.

I haven't seen any cars lately with interiors made out of platinum, black walnut, and solid gold. How can a car's interior be "too plasticky" when every fukking car in the world has a plastic interior?

no shit, they're all plastic. Thing is, though, some are a lot more plasticy than others. Honda and toyota get their plastic from somebody that knows how to make nice looking plastic. GM and chrysler get it from walmart, I think.

4. Center-Mounted Gauges.

Whoever designed these damn things should be dragged behind a car while the driver cranes his neck and struggles to read the speedometer.

I'm with ya on this one, fess. This fukker needs a beatin', bad. I suspect it was the idea of some fukkin' gook who figured they could save a few bucks by making left hand and right hand drive mdels cheaper. I saymake them fukking limeys and japs switch over.

Fess, Feelin' Cranky

[Wolfman]

On my trip to CNY in August, I rented a Dodge Charger.
I realized it was rear-wheel drive from the handling. It
was OK in good weather; but I wouldn't want to be
driving one in Buffalo today !!
It had a goofy shifter for the automatic tranny too--
and the seat was very uncompromising on a long drive !!
I'd never rent one again if I have to drive up and
most certainly would never buy one--even though it
was a hot looking machine !

[RadioFan]

The rented Dodge Grand Caravan I used had the Emergency Flasher activate every time the slider doors open..... :bigrolleyes:

Did it have a built-in Baby on Board yellow flasher installed in the glass of the rear windows? If not, you got a substandard model.

Sincerely,

The paranoid douche who designed that POS.

[The Seer]

Sorry, bad flashback to another site....

[Derron]

On my trip to CNY in August, I rented a Dodge Charger.
I realized it was rear-wheel drive from the handling. It
was OK in good weather; but I wouldn't want to be
driving one in Buffalo today !!
It had a goofy shifter for the automatic tranny too--
and the seat was very uncompromising on a long drive !!
I'd never rent one again if I have to drive up and
most certainly would never buy one--even though it
was a hot looking machine !

Fuck oh dear... a 4 door Charger ?? What the fuck is that ??

Don't recall many 4 door Chargers back in the day ??

Mopar put out some bad ass cars, and the Charger was one ofhhtem. But to reincarnate it has a 4 door to appeal to whoever, just blows ...

[Derron]

The rented Dodge Grand Caravan I used had the Emergency Flasher activate every time the slider doors open..... :bigrolleyes:

Did it have a built-in Baby on Board yellow flasher installed in the glass of the rear windows? If not, you got a substandard model.

Sincerely,

The paranoid douche who designed that POS.

I really don't know what you mean.

Sin,

The Engineer who designed the 30,000 mile transmission failure.

[Ken]

Sorry, bad flashback to another site....

Oh shit, rack that. Props to PSU for the linkage. We had some fun in those forums.

[campinfool]

Buy a bigger car and stop crying.

[tuff gong]

Buy a bigger car and stop crying.

bigger than an SUV? Reread (2) in Fester's rant

[PSUFAN]

enough backseat for shutyomouth and kcwhatshisname, the fat guy, to reenact a brokeback mounting scene.

ha ha ha

Probe Forums

Time for a revisit?

http://probefaq.org/messageboard/messag ... ge&msg=123

[silvurna]

IMO, cars are like coffee...spend more $, get a higher quality product. The high-end Lexus, as an example, has some plastic, but real wood/leather etc are available if you need that ambience.
As for the shifter issue, a lot of car manufacturers are making a 'Sport Mode' available ..leave the shifter in second or third gear and mash on the gas...then select each higher/lower gear as needed...also remember, there are now cars available with eight-speed automatic trannys...that Sport Mode' might be a lot of fun...especially if the car is also equipped with Launch Control...
Spend More...Get More.

[Dinsdale]

As for the shifter issue, a lot of car manufacturers are making a 'Sport Mode' available ..leave the shifter in second or third gear and mash on the gas...then select each higher/lower gear as needed

Hey, neat idea!

Sin,
1969

[XXXL]

Try driving a 94-96 caddy fleetwood, legroom and then some, it's like driving around in your living room.......

[silvurna]

As for the shifter issue, a lot of car manufacturers are making a 'Sport Mode' available ..leave the shifter in second or third gear and mash on the gas...then select each higher/lower gear as needed

Hey, neat idea!

Sin,
1969

it is if you also have paddle shifters.

[Cuda]

proper manual trannies

Rack the Rudy Guilani reset

[Cuda]

You could lose 100 lbs and still not fit into that gown, fat fuck