In keeping with the spirit of the holiday:
From the home office in Burbank, here are the Top 10 Things Jesus Said on the Cross, that didn't get recorded:
10. Owwwwwwww God damn, that fucking hurts ....... Owwwwwwwwwww
9. Judas, new robe dude? - Where'd you get the coin for that?
8. Hey Mary Magdalin, I can look right down your shirt from up here.
7. That's just Great, my last fucking supper was at Applebees
6. Man I must be losing it. Now I see a giant fucking bunny hiding eggs
5. You Stupid Jew Motherfuckers, this isn't what I meant when I said "Rack Me"
4. Pilot, you call yourself a Roman? The only Roman I see is your Lips roaming over my schlong
3. Yea, I'm God, And yea I could zap all your faggy asses if I really wanted to. Bode' Me.
2. Irieicus, quit thou gazing up at my crank
1. One day, 8 tiny reindeer will get you cocksuckers for this
I'd so be going to Hell if there really was one
Happy eAster
Moderator: Jesus H Christ
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SaladTosser
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SaladTosser
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Mister Bushice
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10. WHAT?? I have to die for these schmucks??
9. Can someone tell Judas those directions I gave him to paradise just lead to a rope hanging from a cliff?
No, wait. Screw him.
8. I hope I don't end up in hell for banging that Magdalene bitch.
7. How is my death helping these idiots? They'll only develop some bizarre cultish following of me, killing each other in my name for centuries, until...
Shit. Did I say all that out loud?
6. How did I end up with a bunch of weaponless winos for guards? Was I high?
5. Hey Dad! How about turning this cross into a posturepedic for a bit?
4. PETER!! you fucking lied to save your own ass, you will be forever known as a DICK.
3. Damned virgin birth has fucked me up good now.
2. PILATE!! I said I was KEEN of the Jews!! PILATE!!!!!!
1. Barrabus?? They picked fucking BARRABUS????
9. Can someone tell Judas those directions I gave him to paradise just lead to a rope hanging from a cliff?
No, wait. Screw him.
8. I hope I don't end up in hell for banging that Magdalene bitch.
7. How is my death helping these idiots? They'll only develop some bizarre cultish following of me, killing each other in my name for centuries, until...
Shit. Did I say all that out loud?
6. How did I end up with a bunch of weaponless winos for guards? Was I high?
5. Hey Dad! How about turning this cross into a posturepedic for a bit?
4. PETER!! you fucking lied to save your own ass, you will be forever known as a DICK.
3. Damned virgin birth has fucked me up good now.
2. PILATE!! I said I was KEEN of the Jews!! PILATE!!!!!!
1. Barrabus?? They picked fucking BARRABUS????
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War Wagon
- 2010 CFB Pickem Champ
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Re: Happy eAster
But you don't really know, so there's the rub.KC Scott wrote: I'd so be going to Hell if there really was one
Best to hedge bets, and dissing Jesus might not be in your best interest.
He is arisen. My mother believes that, so it's good enough for me.
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peter dragon
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MgoBlue-LightSpecial
- Eternal Scobode
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