Beef Question

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 1:51 am

Yeah, something like that.

At least he wasn't raisng chickens.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 1:55 am

War Wagon wrote:At least he wasn't raisng chickens.

That's where turkey meat comes from, right?

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 2:14 am

Shit, I love all kinds of chicken. Breast, thigh, turkey leg, wing, liver, gizzards, you name it.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 2:23 am

The ribs are the best.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 2:53 am

I picked up some chicken breasteses for dinner on the way home.

I'm thinking about cooking them using the London broil method.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 3:05 am

Mikey wrote:I picked up some chicken breasteses

That's pork, right?

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 3:21 am

Only the baby back ribs.

Headhunter · Post by **Headhunter** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 12:50 pm

Your Dad's in his 90's?

Mace, is that you? Luth?

Or did your dad bust his nut off in his 50's?

I can't imagine being in my 70's and having to pay for ~~college~~ Fork lift school.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:19 pm

Headhunter wrote:Your Dad's in his 90's?

He woulda' been 91 had he lasted. He died at 55 from a massive stroke when I was only 9.

Or did your dad bust his nut off in his 50's?

45, actually, which incidentally is my current age. Mom was 42 at the time.

I can't imagine being in my 70's and having to pay for ~~college~~ Fork lift school.

I could have gone to college, and Social Security woulda' paid for most of it. But after graduation from HS i was sick and tired of school. I chose to join the Air Force instead.

No regrets. I actually earn way more than my college educated siblings, all of whom are many years older than me. And no, it's not for driving a forklift.

Now leave me alone you assholes and quit smacking on me. I'm going to go fire up the grill and BBQ some fine animal flesh, be it Beef.... or maybe Pork... it's going to be good.

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 5:46 am

War Wagon wrote:Now leave me alone you assholes and quit smacking on me. I'm going to go fire up the grill and BBQ some fine animal flesh, be it Beef.... or maybe Pork... it's going to be good.

Let me know if you BBQ up some of those beef baby back ribs. I know of a killer BBQ sauce you can baste them with that I can sell you.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 2:59 pm

Stick to the beef, Whitey, roast up a couple of the drumsticks. Or maybe get some buffalo meat and do up those hot wing thingys.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 5:17 pm

Goober McTuber wrote: Or maybe get some buffalo meat and do up those hot wing thingys.

I always wondered what the secret was to those.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 5:24 pm

Goober McTuber wrote:hot wing thingys.

Speaking of, since we're so many miles off topic, and it just doesn't matter...

Years and years ago, a couple of my friends somehow got engaged in a "whose wings are hotter?" contest.

It wasn't even about making the tastiest wings, just who could burn your freaking face off the fastest. Being a de-facto judge was pretty interesting. Bear in mind, that these were a couple of "I'll fight anybody" mega-tough guys, who fancied themselves quite the foofoo chefs in the kitchen... until it came to wings.

But Scott... Scott learned some tricks. He'd take his wings and marinate them... if you could call it that. He'd put about a half gallon or so of water in a big Tupperware thingy. He'd dump about a bottle of Tobasco, a bottle of something else, and then slice up some haberneros, jalepenos, and whatever other clilies he came up with in the container. He'd turn the fridge down until it was just above freezing. Then he'd dump the wings in there, and let them soak for...oh, about a week. Then he'd dunk them in the deep fryer for a couple of minutes, then on to the pan for the glazing.

Damn.

And anyone who can incorporate a "Wing Eating Retard" reset into that gets bonus points.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 6:56 pm

Was in CNY (crazy times!!) on a work assignment about 10 years ago and we went to this place that seemed to take some pride in its wings. You could order "hotness" scale from 1 to 5. Since this was the part of the country that this delicacy supposedly originated from (OK so Buffalo isn't exactly in CNY {crazy times!!} but it's a lot closer than LowCal is...) we figured we should take this chance to sample the authentic stuff.

Now, I've been eating Mexican food for a long time and I know I can take some heat. But I've had some Indian food (in Portland, BTW) that just about blew me away. It was some kind of minced up salad that had me sweating within about two bites. Mind you I did finish off the whole thing and enjoyed it immensely but it was about 20 minutes or so before I could eat my main dish that was just warm from the oven. The point is that I didn't know what the "5" meant at this wing palace and I wasn't in the mood for anything close to my U&L experience, so I ordered the 4 because the waitress said the 5 was REALLY hot.

Well, that shit came and it tasted fine. But the heat wasn't even equivalent to the homemade red sauce at Rosa's in Fallbrook. U&R'ers must be huge pussies when it comes to capsaicin.

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sun Jul 29, 2007 5:18 pm

I laffed.

“Beef tips” from Mexicali and the U&L.

Absolutely freaking priceless.

Hell, we don’t even feed “London Broil” to our homeless here in the Flyover.

But if we did…

It sure as hell wouldn’t be “broiled.”

What a bunch of frickin’ no minds.

I’ve yet to encounter a Cali-grilled “steak” that wasn’t served slathered in some kind of fucked up mango-saffron-garlic-yogurt sauce. Oh, and BTW: If you’ve resorted to drowning a perfectly good beef cut in some kinda fucked-up marinade, then clearly you haven’t a clue as to what the hell you’re doing….

As for the U&L…
Winter driving tips on Ranier... check
Swimming advice for Oregon’s rivers and coast... check
An honest critique of Northwest “micros” (Red Hook ESB WAS a fan-favorite 'til Dinsy's rant had me searching for a non-conglomo U&L alternative)... check

But beef cooking techniques?!

When Oregon cracks the Top Ten in beef production, maybe I’ll take you seriously on this subject, Dins….

‘Til then: Stick with what you know, Dinsapedia. And clearly, how to cook beef ain’t it. This, from a mook that extols the virtues of an electric grill.

Put it to you this way, Dinsy: You offering beef prep advice would be like me arguing the virtues of anchovies and spinners versus roe and plugs to catch shithooks on the Rogue.

Besides cleaning your oven, a “broiler” just might be useful putting a crispy top on garlic bread or the odd casserole; perhaps even a pan of oven baked fries.

But steak?!

Let’s just say that if you’ve ever resorted to “broiling” beef in your oven

, then you clearly need to eject from this thread RIGHT NOW.

Good Lord.

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Mon Jul 30, 2007 1:45 am

Sounds like a call-out to me.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Mon Jul 30, 2007 4:59 pm

KC Folks' need to be relevant about... something, is always priceless.

KC Dork has somehow decided that they have the upper hand on cooking steak.

Why yes, you did read that right -- steak.

Not lasagna. Not stew. Not pastries. Not anything that involves even the most rudimentary food preparation techniques...

Steak.

I'll let you in on a little secret, KC -- it ain't rocket science(although it apparently is to KC Resident). Matter of fact, I'd venture a guess that you'll find equally skilled steak chefs in every state in the country, probably in about equal proportions.

But of course, these other regions pale in comparison to KC's ability to throw a slab of beef on a fire.

And of course, if someone is actually familiar with the correct recipe for london broil, regardless whether said person noted that there's better uses for low-end beef, that obviously means that that person is incapable of tossing a chunk of cow on a que...obviously.

Every time steaks come up here, the KC Contingent sudden;y thinks they're going to get over for the first time. And what a telling case it is -- because the only thing 12 years in redneck school taught them was "throw beef on grill...MMMMM GOOOD," they somehow think this parlays into some superior knowledge of a cooking technique that requires zero prep, and one step(unless you count flipping it).

It's like decaring BODE over the departments of transportation of other areas for finally mastering the two-wheeler and averaging only one wreck per hundred yards sans the training wheels.

It's like learning to use the toilet without mom there to wipe up the mess around the bowl afterwards.

Then, of course, you have the KCMasterSteakChef -- he's the one who gets all the respect in his community, because he managed to light a barbeque twice in succession without injuring a family member or neighbor. Usually, the SteakMasterChef can be heard regaling the mere AverageKCSteakChef with tales of how he "seen one of them thar hills," once. Then he'll usually go on to explain how "yeah, they don't have steaks on that thar West Coast. Some day, we a-might have to udjukate them hippes."

Great googly-moogly, Flatlander -- listen to yourself. At least Dork Wagon and Side Of Beef 3.0 usually throw out the bait and wait for others to make them and their burg look bad -- but not you, oh steak master-chef.

Dang. I will continue to keep "avoiding KC like the plague" as one of those "to-do list" things before I die.

ppanther · Post by **ppanther** » Mon Jul 30, 2007 6:51 pm

RACK Dins.

I remember the first time I grilled steak... I was a little nervous as I had never done it before.

I'm not really sure why I was nervous.

I was able to get the charcoal lit and the grill heated, and somehow (though I still can't believe I figured this out, I must be BRILLIANT) I managed to 'put the steak on the grill'. Apparently I have the natural ability to 'flip the steak' and ya know what? I was even able to 'remove the steak from the grill' at the right time.

Given my location, however, I must have flipped the steak wrong or something. Oh well, it was still tasty.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Mon Jul 30, 2007 7:13 pm

Truman may start commenting on beer when Kansas/Missouri become one of the leading hop-producing states.

Wait -- the Flatlanders don't put any hops in their beer. Stupid fuckers can't even make beer right. No wonder they want to pride themselve on the easiest food on the planet to cook -- they don't have the mental capacity for much else.

Priceless.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Mon Jul 30, 2007 7:18 pm

There is a restaurant here in Madison that consistently places among the top 5 in the Midwest in those major travel magazine ratings. It’s called Smoky’s. For what it’s worth, Smoky’s does their steaks on a very hot slab of steel, and serves them sizzling on one of those pre-heated metal plates. No grill.

Totally awesome slabs of beef. I had one just last week. I’m sure that the major contributing factors here are the quality of the raw cow and the level of heat used to cook it.

They also must not have any ovens, as they do not offer baked potatoes. They do, however, serve the absolute best hash browns I’ve ever tasted.

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Tue Jul 31, 2007 4:03 am

Perfect.

Ten solid column inches of bullshit proving that you still don’t have a fucking clue as to what the fuck you’re talking about.

Nicely done.

Hell, BSmack should take lessons…

Dinsdale wrote:KC Folks' need to be relevant about... something, is always priceless.

You did NOT just post this, did you, DinsClavin?

I’ll take Irony for Early Retirement, Alex…

Guess a dozen-or-so-not-so-veiled references to deck screws, knitting needles, and water treatment systems would bring “relevance” to this thread eh, Dinsy? Oh, and why not jock the local cooking knives again for good measure?

It’s a Cooking Forum, Dins. Pothead hippie mod in the clown suit out front shoulda told you.

God forbid that the inbreds in the Flyover just might have built a better mousetrap.

Well and good. You wanna burn perfectly good beef in your oven

, then go for it.

Oh, and that sound you hear while searing your London Broil to “perfection” on your electric grill…?

Sorry, DinsBroil. But it ain’t the Flyover laughing with you…

BTW, Pacific Coast Redwoods fare about as well as hops do in these parts. Something to do with the intense heat and dry summers that persist in this area. But those fabulous Left Coast micros you so adore would pour a bit flat without Flyover barley - or wheat for that matter - just to twist the knife…

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Tue Jul 31, 2007 4:06 am

Pity the panther…

Keyboard stuck on Rackslock.

Only reason why you shoulda been nervous, Sugar, would’ve been if Dinsbroil offered to cook your steak for you.

But rack you anyway for mastering the ol’ steak-flipper….

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Tue Jul 31, 2007 7:29 am

The man who wants to play the "irony" card posts this...

Take note -- it'll come into play a bunch...

Truman wrote:you still don’t have a fucking clue as to what the fuck you’re talking about.

God forbid that the inbreds in the Flyover just might have built a better mousetrap.

No, you read that right -- a little slapping upside the head, and KC Remedial still thinks they've cornered the market on throwing a slab of beef on a fire.

You wanna burn perfectly good beef in your oven :lol:, then go for it.

Dinsdale wrote:Alright for stir-fry, excellent for jerky. Or ground up for burgers if it's on sale cheap enough -- at least it isn't what's swept of the cutting floor like the house ground beef.

OK... now where did I say anything about wanting to put top round in the oven?

Just because I know how to make a london broil, I think a quick review of this thread will confirm I never endorsed such a thing. Matter of fact, with the above statement, I actually did the opposite.

P.S.: None of those preparations involve the oven.

BTW, Pacific Coast Redwoods fare about as well as hops do in these parts. Something to do with the intense heat and dry summers that persist in this area.

Oh, dear.

Is this part of your whole "have a fucking clue as to what the fuck you’re talking about" mantra?

Uhm... you DO realize it rains several times as much in the summer months where you live compared to where I do, right?

Ain't exactly cold, either(although it's been a fairly mild summer so far this year... should only be 2-3 days in the low-mid 90's this week).

But those fabulous Left Coast micros you so adore would pour a bit flat without Flyover barley - or wheat for that matter - just to twist the knife…

Or is this your "have a fucking clue as to what the fuck you’re talking about" entry?

Uhm, douche... we don't use nasty flyover barley for beer. And real breweries don't use wheat for... anything(although half the other side of the state is wheat fields, dumbass). They grow special barley cultivars right here at home, just for the purpose of making beer. Matter of fact, Oregon State University has a barley program that specializes in producing cultivars just for making beer.

Truman wrote:you still don’t have a fucking clue as to what the fuck you’re talking about.

Yup... priceless.

ppanther · Post by **ppanther** » Tue Jul 31, 2007 2:28 pm

Truman wrote:Pity the panther…

Keyboard stuck on Rackslock.

Only reason why you shoulda been nervous, Sugar, would’ve been if Dinsbroil offered to cook your steak for you.

But rack you anyway for mastering the ol’ steak-flipper….

Pity me? For what?

I'm not the one who thinks the whole "grilling" thing is a magic technique that somehow stops working when it reaches the western states.