Christmas party...

[ChargerMike]

..to go or not? At this point I'm leaning toward the later. With the real estate market in the toilet the company has downgraded the venue to The Canyon Club in Agoura Hills. Now the Canyon is not a bad hang, but it's no Universal City. Some things to consider...
Am I ready face the misfits, the phonies, and the sloshed?
..and then ,is there anything more discusting than an over the hill over intoxicated female real estate agent showing too much of her aging, sagging, wrinkled bod? I say yuk...It's just not worth it.
Last year I went with a sweet little thing half my age and that was a blast while it lasted. About mid-festivities she hooked with...you guessed it..some dude half my age. The remainder of the evening was a mixture of schmoozing, avoiding the aforementioned OTH's, and watching some dude half my age leave early with my sugar

All things considered, I think I'll head over to the Cigar Lounge and spark a good Cuban.

Merry Christmas to all...and to all...GOOD NIGHT NOW!

[smackaholic]

Lessee......do I sit home and beat off thinking about that sweet young thing I used to bang or do I pick up one of those saggy tittied OTHers and bang the shit out of her.

Seeing as you are equally OTH, I say you go with the latter. Good luck and good hunting.

[Jay in Phoenix]

Mike, skip the shindig. A downgraded party is just that...a downgrade. And if the example you set down is any sort of barometer of future parties, well?

Spark up that fat Cubano, down a shot of Cognac and/or some sweet suds and chill.

¡apurar las copas!

Jay

[Screw_Michigan]

Last year I went with a sweet little thing half my age

Did she like to get freaky?

[ChargerMike]

Last year I went with a sweet little thing half my age

Did she like to get freaky?

...I'd have to ask the guy she left with..

[Screw_Michigan]

I was assuming she was one of those half-age freaky chicks that Atomic Puke hangs with.

[Mikey]

There's got to be some guy there older than you. Well maybe not.

But if there is you should go ahead to the party and move in on whatever sweet young thing he's with.

[The Seer]

Canyon Club is definitely not the locale of movers and shakers....

Yeah, Xmas parties always carry the risk that some 50ish divorcee will throw a few back and shove her tongue down your throat wishing you a happy happy.

[ChargerMike]

Canyon Club is definitely not the locale of movers and shakers....

Yeah, Xmas parties always carry the risk that some 50ish divorcee will throw a few back and shove her tongue down your throat wishing you a happy happy.

...my worst nightmare..

Seer, you'll appreciate this, the Co. was considering TPC and opted for TCC :?

[Cuda]

About mid-festivities she hooked with...you guessed it..some dude half my age. The remainder of the evening was a mixture of schmoozing, avoiding the aforementioned OTH's, and watching some dude half my age leave early with my sugar

You didn't take the opportunity to slip out ahead of time and slash his tires? Then you could have thrown your cigar at them and laughed and hollered " Have Fun Walking, BITCH!" as you peeled out of the parking lot

[smackaholic]

Canyon Club is definitely not the locale of movers and shakers....

Yeah, Xmas parties always carry the risk that some 50ish divorcee will throw a few back and shove her tongue down your throat wishing you a happy happy.

...my worst nightmare..

I dunno, but, seems to me that nailing a drunk 50ish freak is trumped by date half my age leaving with somebody else, on the worst nighmare scale.

[ChargerMike]

Canyon Club is definitely not the locale of movers and shakers....

Yeah, Xmas parties always carry the risk that some 50ish divorcee will throw a few back and shove her tongue down your throat wishing you a happy happy.

...my worst nightmare..

I dunno, but, seems to me that nailing a drunk 50ish freak is trumped by date half my age leaving with somebody else, on the worst nighmare scale.

...touche' :)

[Jerkovich]

Screw the Christmas Parties with the phonies. Ours was at the Riviera in Calabasas. First of all, I live an hour above Santa Barbara, and secondly, I hate Italian food. My boss was begging me to come because I was going to be presented with some such award for being the best of something a rather. BULLSHIT, save it for the annual meeting/torture session that we have every year in Orange.

I went to my four year old's Christmas play instead.

[Derron]

What kind of sugar daddy are you any way?

You think hottie half your age wants your cock ?

That only works if you have gazillions in cash to spend on her, an unlimited supply of cocaine to keep those all nighter's
on track trying to please her...

So you go with out 2 of the most required assets for a middle age guy to bang a 20 something chick and your shocked when she leaves with the stud that is going to ram her dry, without the Viagra, and without chopping a line every 30 minutes ??

The drunk 50's thing would be an easy sure thing, get her before she gets sloppy drunk, and bites your dick ...and you would not need the cash, coke and Viagra...

I say just take a pass on the whole thing..fake titted, made up So Cal bitches anyway.

Pimpin ain't easy..leave it to the younger dudes..

[Wolfman]

then, there''s always............

[Derron]

Canyon Club is definitely not the locale of movers and shakers....

Yeah, Xmas parties always carry the risk that some 50ish divorcee will throw a few back and shove her tongue down your throat wishing you a happy happy.

...my worst nightmare..

I dunno, but, seems to me that nailing a drunk 50ish freak is trumped by date half my age leaving with somebody else, on the worst nighmare scale.

So you would rather go home and beat off imagining your 20 something wish getting horsed by some 20 something dude...

OR

Fuck the slightly drunk 50 something freak..that you at least get to fuck ?

Pretty simple choice there...

[ChargerMike]

then, there''s always............

...DOH!

[Cuda]

So you go with out 2 of the most required assets for a middle age guy to bang a 30 something chick

fixed

[smackaholic]

So you would rather go home and beat off imagining your 20 something wish getting horsed by some 20 something dude...

OR

Fuck the slightly drunk 50 something freak..that you at least get to fuck ?

Pretty simple choice there...

Nope.

Maybe the wording of my statement was a little confusing. I said that having your young tart wisked away was a worse nighmare than pounding the drunk 50 year old.

Now, I haven't had that particular nightmare, but, after close to 20 years of banging my almost 46 year old wife, assuming she keeps the same trend on the bangability chart, I calculate that she will still be somewhat bangable at 50.

60?

Uhhhhhh. I don't really have enough data to predict that far out. Let's just ask wolfie instead.

[Sirfindafold]

Who gives a fuck?

[The Seer]

Canyon Club is definitely not the locale of movers and shakers....

Yeah, Xmas parties always carry the risk that some 50ish divorcee will throw a few back and shove her tongue down your throat wishing you a happy happy.

...my worst nightmare..

Seer, you'll appreciate this, the Co. was considering TPC and opted for TCC :?

Prolly saved a few that way...

Are you sufficiently healed or are you gonna keep dodging me and Lax on the course?

[Goober McTuber]

My boss was begging me to come because I was going to be presented with some such award for being the best of something a rather.

Reindeer Bukake Target of the Year.

[BSmack]

Mike,

You should have called her up the next day and told her that there were no hard feelings and BTW, would you like to take a spin with me on my dirt bike? ;)

[Jerkovich]

My boss was begging me to come because I was going to be presented with some such award for being the best of something a rather.

Reindeer Bukake Target of the Year.

Ya, they really stepped up this year.

How about coming up with an original smack line instead of your usual 4th grade play ground shtick?

[ChargerMike]

Canyon Club is definitely not the locale of movers and shakers....

Yeah, Xmas parties always carry the risk that some 50ish divorcee will throw a few back and shove her tongue down your throat wishing you a happy happy.

...my worst nightmare..

Seer, you'll appreciate this, the Co. was considering TPC and opted for TCC :?

Prolly saved a few that way...

Are you sufficiently healed or are you gonna keep dodging me and Lax on the course?

...bwa..NO! no more ducking..I promise I'll make it out to the links in 09...I've been smoking sticks instead of swinging them since the accident, but I'm told it's more fun to do both simultaneously. :D

I now have a built-in excuse for errant shots, the "coach" can't yell at me anymore...wait, no Tony will still yell.