HEAT WAVE!!!

Jay in Phoenix · Post by **Jay in Phoenix** » Mon Dec 22, 2008 7:32 pm

"And that's it and that's the only thing I need, is this. I don't need this or this. Just this ashtray. And this paddle game, the ashtray and the paddle game and that's all I need. And this remote control. The ashtray, the paddle game, and the remote control, and that's all I need. And these matches. The ashtray, and these matches, and the remote control and the paddle ball. And this lamp. The ashtray, this paddle game and the remote control and the lamp and that's all I need. And that's all I need too. I don't need one other thing, not one - I need this. The paddle game, and the chair, and the remote control, and the matches, for sure. And this. And that's all I need. The ashtray, the remote control, the paddle game, this magazine and the chair."

Double racks for Fester and the Jerk reset!

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Mon Dec 22, 2008 7:51 pm

PSUFAN wrote:When I was a kid, winter seemed a constant.

Still is around here, to an extent. An occasional cold spell certainly isn't out of the ordinary... but 4 days is a really long one. I'm sure within a few days, we'll be back to consistancy -- 45 in the day, upper 30's at night, with a near-constant mist/light rain falling... with a couple bigdaddy doozie rain storms coming straight off the ocean spread through the winter months.

Of course, if we get one of those heavy warm storms coming in right now... it's 1996 all over again... way too much water, way too fast. Then the lowlands are primarily the underwater lands, and we'll be wishing it was only snow and ice keeping us from getting around.

But, what with it being the holiday week, and with the "heavy" (by lowlands standards), we resigned ourselves to shutting the city down for a few days.

This sucks-btw

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Mon Dec 22, 2008 9:05 pm

Dinsdale wrote:
smackaholic wrote:north face outer shell

BLASPHEMY!!!!!!

Sin,
mvsmymotherdidn'tteachmehowtodressmyself

smackaholic wrote:Poly fleece is some pretty epcot shit.
Yup. And it usually water-resistant enough to deal with the typical light rains around here without soaking through. Although my Ol' Reliable Columbia Sportswear fleece jacket is getting about worn out... which dramatically reduces the water resistance.

22 and light snow. About a foot on the ground (my estimate from yesterday was measured where some had blown in, making it inaccurate). Would take much digging to go anywhere (although I've been out on foot).

This is day 9 of snow/ice... unfucking heard of around here. We're just not set up for it, and none of these asshat transplants brought any snowplows with them. The handful we have around here ain't keeping up. Plus, I live on the west side of town, which features a steep hill every few hundred feet. Tough going. They ran trains 24/7, but 3 of the 4 commuter lines froze over so badly they aren't operating.

You got a problem with the north face? They make some pretty decent shit, imo. Columbia is nice too. This was a salvation army store find. I drop in there every now and then. The OL lives in that frikken place and has made some decent $$$$ turning stuff over on feebay. I picked up a really, really nice old north face down parka, circa 80s. Paid about 20 bucks for it. Got a smidge over 200. There is an apparent rule on feebay that if you list an item as "vintage north face", chumps will outbid one another into bankrupcy to win it.

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Tue Dec 23, 2008 2:53 am

Cuda wrote:drive by rack for Fester

the rest of you have bored my tits off

Here you go:

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Tue Dec 23, 2008 4:09 am

Dinsdale wrote: Still is around here, to an extent. An occasional cold spell certainly isn't out of the ordinary... but 4 days is a really long one.

Most snow since 1968..when we had over 16 inches on the ground for 5 weeks..then 1978...1989...were the major snow events...I really don't get how you snow bound fucks can put up with this shit...

Snow plowed a few driveways this morning..got a good size removal job tomorrow. Might as well convert this shit to some cash money...

Did the trip to the airport last night to pick up one of the boys...nary a snow plow was seen, nor was a road plowed or graveled..saw one cop and a few brilliant semi drivers trying to take uphill 15 degree curves and failing to make it..bawwhhhha..All the bullshit you see on the news about these highway fucks working so hard is a bunch of bullshit..they can't plow a fucking road around here...these highways have not been touched since it snowed...the snow is beyond plowing now. They need augers, which of course they don't have..so just close the fucking roads until it melts..and collect their government gravy train salaries

Then of course there was the dude in his some kind of generic SUV hauling ass along I 84..passed us , he was doing about 60 on packed snow and ice/, he then attempted to make the I 5 north bound turn off, and promptly butt slammed a parked tow truck who was trying to get some other idiot off the off ramp..fucking funny shit that was.

That SUV bounced off that larger tow truck like a fucking ping pong ball, did a come back bounce off the jersey barrier and spun around again, and hit the jersey barrier again. We laffed..

Fucking Alaska Airlines...pussy's don't want their planes on the ground in Portland in the ice, so they just fucking canceled damn near every flight into Portland..another kid trying to get home from SoCal..he just may as well drive..

Fuck this shit..

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Tue Dec 23, 2008 5:25 am

Derron wrote:Most snow since 1968..

RACK you, for contradicting the "most since 1980" mantra every fucking news agency in town (including the NWS) has spouted 1000 times in the last couple of days.

I really don't get how you snow bound fucks can put up with this shit...

Werd. Shit happens every twenty years or so around here, and rarely this bad. Anyone who actually volunteers for this shit annually... well, frankly, is a fucking idiot loser.

Fucking MISERABLE. Yet some of you tools see this as an acceptable way to live life?

I don't get it... and never will.

All the bullshit you see on the news about these highway fucks working so hard is a bunch of bullshit..they can't plow a fucking road around here...these highways have not been touched since it snowed

I've made 3 or 4 trips up I5 between North Portland (Up Nof', not "NoPo" like the fagass gentrification-bent transplants call it) and Tigard, and I've been behind snowplows every time. We just don't have the resources to have a hardcore heavy snow contingency plan... why would we, when 2" is a major snow event around here?

You buying?

Fuck this shit..

GIMME BACK MY RAIN!!!!

longtimelistener2 · Post by **longtimelistener2** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 5:40 am

Derron wrote:

I thought you were north?

Anyhoo... 24 degrees (it's warmed up), pretty close to a foot of powder, with about 1/4" of ice over the top.

Rode the bus across town this morning... what a treat.

Used to be when I was around last time. Since then, moved to Sherwood to get the hell outta Bethany and avoid 217.

We have about 18" with 1/2" of ice sandwiched between. Now they're saying we can look forward to another 3"-8".

In all my years I've never seen it this bad down this low. This isn't Government Camp!!

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 6:45 am

longtimelistener2 wrote: Since then, moved to Sherwood to get the hell outta Bethany and avoid 217.

So, see if I've got this right... you moved to Sherwood for an improvement in the traffic situation?

I'm not even sure how to respond to that... except to say that if you weren't my homiest homey on these boards, I'd probably spend at least a couple of paragraphs ridiculing you.

Your escape from an overly congested freeway was to move to a town with no freeway?

It's none of my business, but I hope you work in Sherwood or Toilettown or Tigard or somewhere around here (I'm still living behind the strip mall on 99W).

This isn't Government Camp!!

The skiing is approximately the same about now.

Got drunk in Guvvy around August. 80+ degrees out, and there was still huge mountains of snow that they had plowed into piles.

Looks like it might be another one of those winters... maybe I can score another job at Santiam Pass during a week-long blizzard again, like this last winter. The snowplow facility up there got over 20 feet of snow in 2 weeks, and they couldn't even keep their own lot clear... the ODOT guys ended up running for their lives last January... and the facility got trashed from the weight of the snow. Good work if you can get it.

longtimelistener2 · Post by **longtimelistener2** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 8:23 am

Forest Heights is built out and everything else has gone "tracts" so not much action up North. All the high end work is in Stafford/LO/acreage so being perched up on the hill between Sherwood and Wilsonville allows me to go "both ways"

Cue the homo smack in 3....2....

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 4:54 pm

Mace wrote:
Most snow since 1968..when we had over 16 inches on the ground for 5 weeks..then 1978...1989...were the major snow events...I really don't get how you snow bound fucks can put up with this shit..
Dins alluded to the fact that you guys aren't equipped to handle the snow, Derron, and he's right. Our main roads are never (okay, very rarely) closed because the State has the equipment to keep them open while Portland doesn't, and shouldn't. On rare occasions I'll drive my F-150 to work in the mornings but usually get along just fine with the Department's front wheel drive Taurus. You get used to the winter weather when you grow up in it...although, the older I get, the more I think about retiring to a warm weather climate with my golf clubs during the worst of the winter months (January/February) and returning for the start of college baseball in March.

Oh I get the infra structure thing..we only get this much snow (18 inches +) once every 30 years, and other amounts up to 8 inches every 5 years or so. But is just fucking stops everything for way too long this time...

I can handle getting around..have all the 4 wheel drives, experience etc..but stupid people just get more stupid when the snow fly's here.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 6:27 pm

Mace wrote:Our main roads are never (okay, very rarely) closed because the State has the equipment to keep them open while Portland doesn't, and shouldn't.

I believe your area is known for being very flat, ours is very hilly. Hell, to go from the city proper to the western burbs, it generally requires going over "mountains" (to you Flyover folks anyway) nearly 1000' feet in elevation in a couplefew short miles. East side of town is mostly flat, with a few notable exceptions. Very hard to go anywhere on the West Side without encountering steep hills.

And as of this morning, it looks like the big thaw has begun... hopefully. I'm about tired of taking my life in my hands just to go anywhere, and I'm tired of taking care of my shopping needs at the 7-11 on the corner.

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 6:49 pm

Dinsdale wrote:
Mace wrote:Our main roads are never (okay, very rarely) closed because the State has the equipment to keep them open while Portland doesn't, and shouldn't.
I believe your area is known for being very flat, ours is very hilly. Hell, to go from the city proper to the western burbs, it generally requires going over "mountains" (to you Flyover folks anyway) nearly 1000' feet in elevation in a couplefew short miles. East side of town is mostly flat, with a few notable exceptions. Very hard to go anywhere on the West Side without encountering steep hills.

Case in point (in Seattle):

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 7:25 pm

Way back when, I have a vague memory of being in Seattle during a freeze...

A truly impossible situation.

While much of the Portland area is quite hilly, Seattle is "extremely hilly."

And also doesn't get enough snow/ice to justify much infrastructure -- much cheaper and easier to just shut the city down.

Hell, they get so little of it, the crews at SeaTac didn't even realize you weren't supposed to squirt the de-icer into the air vents of the planes (cracking up, in an evil sort of way, although I feel for the victims).

And the weatherdorks are changing their tune in a hurry this morning -- it's warming up much more quickly than anticipated today. There ice/icicles dropping everywhere, limbs crashing down out of trees, and the snowmelt is starting to form rivers... if it starts raining hard with the warm front, we're in DEEP shit with all of the low-elevation snow right now.

I'm knocking on wood that it doesn't get nasty. The satellite pic doesn't look too imposing, but if the Pacific kicks up a big one in the coming days, it could be pretty fucking bad for flooding.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 11:07 pm

And...right back we go to the 35 and raining routine...

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 11:27 pm

37 and raining here... thank goodness.

Looking like one hell of a slushy mess... just in time for me having to run all over town... goody.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Dec 25, 2008 12:26 am

Dinsdale wrote:just in time for me having to run all over town

Uhm, yeah.

Except that part where all of that snow and ice is now packed down into these big slushy mounds.

See, this is the Portland snow I know -- above freezing, packed, wet slush, and completely impossible to drive a vehicle on -- chains cut through the slush, hit the pavement and fly off. Without chains, the wet ice offers a frictional coefficient approximately that of magnetic levitation.

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Thu Dec 25, 2008 12:52 am

Dinsdale wrote:
Dinsdale wrote:just in time for me having to run all over town

Uhm, yeah.

Except that part where all of that snow and ice is now packed down into these big slushy mounds.

See, this is the Portland snow I know -- above freezing, packed, wet slush, and completely impossible to drive a vehicle on -- chains cut through the slush, hit the pavement and fly off. Without chains, the wet ice offers a frictional coefficient approximately that of magnetic levitation.

Well.. at least it quit snowing..now the base is thawing and 8 to 12 inches of fucking slush to drive in. ??

Finished my snow removal jobs..coming home was unique..skid loader on a trailer behind the F 350 diesel..good thing the kid dialed up the chip on that truck..I had that bitch hammered coming up 2 small hills..but that shit is now over..I am on my 2nd Baileys of the day..well on my way to 3 or 4...get an extra $ 3000 this month..not bad..

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Dec 25, 2008 1:04 am

Derron wrote:Well.. at least it quit snowing..now the base is thawing and 8 to 12 inches of fucking slush to drive in.

And the warm front quit pushing in, and the temp is dropping like a rock in Dinsland.

I live a couplew of short blocks off 99W. Can't get out of the driveway to get to the de-iced hiway. Don't have chains for my current set of tires, and they'd fly to pieces the second I hit 99W... and I wouldn't chain up to go 250 yards anyway... just something wrong in principle with that.

Supposed to take someone from North Portland to the airport at 5 fucking 30 in the AM... who lives one freaking block from the MAX, but that train isn't running, and the Blue doesn't run early enough to get there on time anyway.

I've got a sneaking hunch that with the front dying, and the skies clearing, it's not going to stay above freezing tonight. If all this massive amounts of slush refreezes... can you say 1980?

Bitch can catch a cab to the airport.

Ain't nobody going over the river and through the woods to grandmother's house if this shit freezes up.

This is fucked up. We're like 33% below our annual precipitation average, and it tries to make up for it when it's freezing?

Fuck you, Mother Nature... fuck you right in your fucking mouth.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Dec 25, 2008 1:08 am

BTW-if you drink Bailey's on the rocks, you're a flaming faggot.

Bailey's isn't inherently homosexual by definition... it's perfectly manly to put it in your coffee, so long as the drink was mixed before 10:30AM.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Thu Dec 25, 2008 1:11 am

New plan...

I'm now working on getting liquored up as fast as humanly fucking possible without vomiting, since I'm taking the bus/train/substitute for train shuttle to North Fucking Portland, from my southern locale.

The weather-altered bus schedule says something like "we'll get there when we get there, assface... and you'll like it. We may pick you up, we may not."

Going to take hours to get there.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Thu Dec 25, 2008 2:01 am

Dinsdale wrote:
Ain't nobody going over the river and through the woods to grandmother's house if this shit freezes up.

This is fucked up. We're like 33% below our annual precipitation average, and it tries to make up for it when it's freezing?

Fuck you, Mother Nature... fuck you right in your fucking mouth.

Got ice skates?

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Thu Dec 25, 2008 2:08 am

we are getting some of that awesome U&L weather. Raining like hell. Somewhere in the mid thirties. I guess it's OK.....if you are home sipping baileys, fag, or if you are in your rig, just so long as it's not a 91 accord with a drivers window that doesn't quite sit in the track like it ought to. If you are actually out in it, though, it fukking sucks big hairy moose balls. Fukk this shit. Gimme back my 29 and snowing like hell.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Dec 26, 2008 7:17 pm

Supposed to get "heavy" rains starting very shortly.

I'm assuming "hevy" isn't going to be heavy enough to put us underwater with the snowmelt.

But the rain can't get here soon enough. At 33-34 degrees, this slush isn't going anywhere quickly, and chains on a 4WD don't seem to be helping anyone's cause on any of the unplowed roads... freaking nightmare out there. Main streets are all clear... which is great if you live on one. I live 200-300 yards off one, and it was a looooooong drive out to the hiway, and a shovel was involved.

Fuck you, Mother Nature. Don't fucking do this again for another 60 years, when it won't be my problem.

Kierland · Post by **Kierland** » Fri Dec 26, 2008 8:44 pm

mvscal wrote: You can get hypothermia under those conditions in less than an hour.

Have you ever been right about anything? From Plame to WMDs to Genetics you get everything wrong. Good show you Racist fuckface.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Fri Dec 26, 2008 8:54 pm

i thought you were dead.

Kierland · Post by **Kierland** » Fri Dec 26, 2008 9:00 pm

You, much like, mvsKKKal were wrong.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Dec 26, 2008 9:25 pm

mvscal was quite correct -- you certainly can get hypothermia PDQ in those conditions...

if you're wearing a teeshirt.

He was however mistaken about "you'll get wet no matter what you wear."

But on the point you decided to cite him for... nope, it's you who is wrong.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Dec 26, 2008 9:52 pm

Yeah, because Uncle Sam ALWAYS has everything figured out.

Uhm, as a much younger man, I used to install irrigation systems. In the U&L winter. Involved standing in knee deep mud for several hours.

And frankly, getting cold and wet was never a problem. Did it on a daily basis for a while... hence my numerous chuckles at your expense.

But I am truly shocked to learn there's retards in the US Army that can't properly dress themselves, even with the government's help... no, really, who woulda thunk it?

Had even worse gigs than that. Setting chokers in the woods in December (short lived career that was -- shittiest job ever) would make you wish you were digging an IFP.

Kierland · Post by **Kierland** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 12:08 am

Dinsdale wrote:But on the point you decided to cite him for... nope, it's you who is wrong.

STFU you dim fuck. His position in this thread is way off the mark, as you yourself have pointed out.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 4:54 pm

68 degrees here yesterday at the downtown airport, breaking the record high of 63 set in 1954. All the snow and ice went ~poof... leaving behind a soggy, muddy mess.

This morning, T-storms, tornado warnings, a new cold front and now ice all over the trees downing limbs. Just lovely. At least we haven't lost power... yet.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 7:01 pm

68 degrees and sunny here in the Burgh. Just got back from the park. Supposed to be down to 30 again tomorrow.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 7:12 pm

68? The "heat wave" thread was an appropriate place to post that, for sure. Actually, 68 would trash the record high around here. Hell, 68 would break the all time record for the month of January here (hit 67 in January a few years ago). U&L Winter -- rarely gets very warm, rarely gets too terribly cold... except for the last couple of weeks, which broke some December records. Snowiest month in Portland since 1950... hence our need to freaking borrow snowplows from Mt Hood just to keep I-5 open (the ruts were causing some pretty freaking serious problems).

Overnight, the mercury got off its ass and decided to climb. Mother Nature's two week reign of terror has ended. It's about 44 and raining at a decent clip. Supposed to dump 3 feet of snow on the ski resorts in the next day... but I don't live there... I live Down Here.

Flood warnings have been issued, but Those People aren't predicting heavy flooding... but they never are. 4WD and chains get you around in snow -- in floods, not so much.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 7:30 pm

Dinsdale wrote: Snowiest month in Portland since 1950... hence our need to freaking borrow snowplows from Mt Hood just to keep I-5 open (the ruts were causing some pretty freaking serious problems).

stop cockblocking chuck D, you fukking faggits. get them plows back up on the hill so they can clear the roads for texan mountainclimbersicle dude.

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 7:32 pm

Dinsdale wrote:BTW-if you drink Bailey's on the rocks, you're a flaming faggot.

Eat me...a hard core drinker like you is going to drink Baileys on the rocks IF it is the only booze in the house..out of Jack, Captains and Pendelton...all at the time...that of course required a 4 wheel drive trip to the Peoples Republic of Oregon Liquor Store..me and 500 other bored people..

Bailey's isn't inherently homosexual by definition... it's perfectly manly to put it in your coffee, so long as the drink was mixed before 10:30AM.

Is this not a U&L law on Christmas morning ? Had the first one at 7:30 am..

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 7:35 pm

Kierland wrote:
mvscal wrote: You can get hypothermia under those conditions in less than an hour.
Have you ever been right about anything? From Plame to WMDs to Genetics you get everything wrong. Good show you Racist fuckface.

Are not you a little late to this one bitch?

Run of of nephews to molest during the Christmas gatherings ?

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 7:41 pm

smackaholic wrote: stop cockblocking chuck D, you fukking faggits. get them plows back up on the hill so they can clear the roads for texan mountainclimbersicle dude.

I'm so with ya, brother.

Matter of fact, I don't think anyone has bought the farm on The Hill since the winter season started... but it pretty much started up there the same time it did down here, so let's give Chucky some time to plan his attack.

The base at the resorts is still only 7 feet. Give it another 10 (which could happen by the end of the week if it doesn't get too warm up there), and I'm sure we'll get our fill of the out-of-staters/transplants offing themselves in all sorts of creative ways. Be it trying to climb the summit at -5 degrees and 100MPH winds, or not realizing that you can't blast a snowboard through a tree-well, or not realizing that just because the snow on the low-elevation trails is packed, it doesn't mean it's a good idea to go for a day hike in a light jacket with a brown bag lunch for sustinance. Let's give Chuck some credit for varying his attack.

I'm too lazy to look for any stats, but I've been told Mt Hood kills more people than any other mountain (I would have guessed Everest, since that really seems to bring out the dumbasses... and there's no shortage of suicidal idiots on Rainier, either).

But hey, at least when the tourists do something monumentally stupid on Mt Hood, us Oregon taxpayers get left with the bill... which was pretty fucking huge for the Texicles (although the one tard's family paid some of it back, which was the right thing to do).

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sat Dec 27, 2008 7:44 pm

BTW-we don't get severe flooding inland very often. And when we do, it's pretty much just Darwin getting locked and loaded, ready to strike.

Kierland · Post by **Kierland** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 12:14 am

Mace wrote:... he is always taking things out of context and then looking like a fool thoughout the rest of the thread.

Good God. Reach much you chromosome missing jizzmop? mvsKKKal's position, as stated, is asinine. Much like your position here. Now go fuck yourself

Dims,
Hood 130 dead since 1896.
Everest 212 since 1921.

And more people climb Hood than Everest. You were saying?

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 1:07 am

Even mt washington has bode on hood with 135 recorded deaths. Washington is a little mt, by western standards, but, it is known for having world class nasty weather. still holds the record for recorded surface wind speed at 231mph. some hiker got run on it last january by avalanche.

Rack Fu · Post by **Rack Fu** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 1:15 am

It was 81 yesterday. 70-something today. Supposed to be cooler tomorrow (mid-50's) and then right back to the 70's.