A propisition for Lib's...

[ChargerMike]

DIVORCE AGREEMENT




Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al:


We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Here is a model separation agreement:

Our two groups can equitably divide up this country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.

We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them).

We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood .

You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protesters.



When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security.

We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N.. but we will no longer be paying the bill.

We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Volkswagon you can find.

We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.

We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag.


Good Night Now!

[Mikey]

Fuck off. We own the whole damn thing now. You get nothin'.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

Fuck off. We own the whole damn thing how. You get nothin'.

You tell 'em! Throw the bums in a concentration camp.

Mikey, if you're the commandant of the camp, watch out for that guy named Hogan, he's sneaky.

[Tom In VA]

Au Contraire Mon frere. We all know Lebeux was the brains behind that operation.

[War Wagon]

Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Like hell they'll go their own way. We're going to make them bitches love us, by whatever grudgefuck means are necessary.

Reacharounds? We got 'em galore. And baby, I promise not to cum in your mouth.

[Mikey]

Fuck off. We own the whole damn thing how. You get nothin'.

You tell 'em! Throw the bums in a concentration camp.

Mikey, if you're the commandant of the camp, watch out for that guy named Hogan, he's sneaky.

I'm pretty sure Hogan's gay. Don't forget, I live in California and we don't put up with that kind of shit anymore.

[BSmack]

That Mike accident did more damage than we ever thought. It has apparently turned CMike into Big O.

[ChargerMike]

...having met and had a cold one with big Jim, I'll take that as a compliment.


btw...I think you're right about the accident. :D

[Terry in Crapchester]

Uhhh, didn't they fight a war over this sort of thing about a century and a half ago?

[BSmack]

Uhhh, didn't they fight a war over this sort of thing about a century and a half ago?

Don't bring that up. CMike still suffers from the PTSD he got at Gettysburg.

[ChargerMike]

Uhhh, didn't they fight a war over this sort of thing about a century and a half ago?

Don't bring that up. CMike still suffers from the PTSD he got at Gettysburg.

....awakened in the dead of night by muzzle flashes and that dreaded gun powder odor...somebody tell me it will go away some day.

[Terry in Crapchester]

Old news, but it seems that CMike has a compadre for his secession suggestion, in a somewhat high place. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/04/1 ... 87636.html

Of course, it's not surprising that this assclown was elected in Texas. Perhaps it's even redundant to point that out.

[Felix]

Old news, but it seems that CMike has a compadre for his secession suggestion, in a somewhat high place. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/04/1 ... 87636.html

Of course, it's not surprising that this assclown was elected in Texas. Perhaps it's even redundant to point that out.

Hannity is also big on secession from "the Tyranny"

(Jon Stewart says that tyranny is the republicans definition for "we lost")