Welcome, everyone, to the first ever T1B PET-OFF!

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Mon May 04, 2009 2:30 am

Over the years we've held Smack-Offs, Wytch-Offs, Suck-Offs, and Who's the Biggest Faggot-Offs. So why not a PET-Off? It was only a matter of time.

First off, this thread is posted globally, so for anyone unaware of what a PET is, it stands for Photo Essay Thread. If that isn't self explanatory enough, it's simply a thread of posted pictures you've taken with your camera, and accompanying text describing each picture or telling a story. If that isn't self explanatory enough, check the Archives for some examples. Anything by Sudden Sam is a good place to start.

The purpose of this thread will be to explain the rules, the format, the time frame, the winning prize, and how to sign up. Please continue reading below.

1) What are the rules?

-Your material ONLY can be used in the PET-Off. I apologize, toolio, you may want to sit this one out. If you are caught using material from the net, or otherwise material that is not your own, you will be automatically disqualified... as well as flung down a well buck naked covered in bacon grease, with lipstick and a wig, to an eagerly awaiting Jess the Rookie. If you DO use material that does not belong to you, but do not get caught, well, RACK you and your cunning; but remember, there is no honor in winning if you cheat. That goes for you too, Pete Carroll. We've got our eye on you buddy.

-Must be brand new, original material. In other words, do not submit pics or PETs you have already posted on this board or any other board. The pics themselves may be old, however.

-No wytched pics. Wytched pics are always great, but will not be allowed in this particular contest.

2) What is the format of the contest?

-One round, winner take all. Judges will vote on who submitted the best overall PET.

-Judges will vote based on not just the quality of your pics, but on the quality of the "essay" portion of your PET. So understand, you need to be funny/original/interesting/engaging with your prose because you won't get by on just pics alone. So don't worry too much about the quality of your pics. Even if it's just a bunch of photos portraying your drive to work, you can still make it an overall entertaining submission.

-Create your own thread for your submission. There will not be one thread for all submissions, as that will bog down the thread and will make scrolling more cumbersome than reading IB on a DListed bender.

-You can post as much or as little as you'd like. However, please keep your entire submission in one post. Do not break it up over several posts or threads.

-Each participant's thread will remain open for the peanut gallery to comment upon.

3) How long does the contest run?

Start and end dates have not yet been determined. We will do sign-ups first and then gage a timetable after that. Feel free to include your thoughts on the matter.

4) What will I win?

Your thread will be archived, you will be showered with praise, and you will receive immunity from the next Perma Ban Meeting held by The Deciders.

5) How do I sign up to be a contestant or judge?

Simple, just post in here. Any and all posters can participate in the PET-Off. Judges will be hand-picked based on who signs up here.

Let's. Do. This.

Van · Post by **Van** » Mon May 04, 2009 2:41 am

I wanna be a judge.

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Mon May 04, 2009 2:42 am

When will the entry period close?

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Mon May 04, 2009 2:57 am

PET-OFF?

Sounds like some kind of high school make-out game.
Can we choose our own partners?

Van · Post by **Van** » Mon May 04, 2009 3:28 am

Even if we can't, you're still in though, arentcha?

:)

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Mon May 04, 2009 3:44 am

Van wrote:I wanna be a judge.

Tough shit, you vapid, racist fucktard.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Mon May 04, 2009 3:44 am

Shit, nobody ever picks me anyway.... :(

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Mon May 04, 2009 3:45 am

Diego in Seattle wrote:When will the entry period close?

May 7th.

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Mon May 04, 2009 4:39 am

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:
Diego in Seattle wrote:When will the entry period close?
May 7th.

So this contest is for the unemployed?

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Mon May 04, 2009 12:33 pm

In on the PET contest.

As for length of competition, here's my idea. Some of us have lives. Me, I travel on weekends a lot vacating. True, this provides much opportunity for a PET, but I already have an idea of what I may want to do. Best if I had no wife/kids around. In July, they will all be gone in Florida to the condo. Not sure if you really want to push this thing out that far though.

As for how to play it, I suggest you give us the window of how long this will last. Then, pick a week out into the future we will have to submit. Anyone who will enter the contest can have their submission ready to go next week or up until the deadline. The thing to avoid I think is someone submitting early and "tipping their hand" and someone else going to get more PET ammo to better their submission. There needs to be a small window to submit. A whole week may even be too much. My vote would be to have the PET's submitted the week of July 27.

Van · Post by **Van** » Mon May 04, 2009 4:50 pm

Stretch it out too long and it'll lose any momentum it might build. Look how badly the last Smack-Off fell apart, due to disinterest. The only way things like this work is if they come hard and fast, in a well recognized burst of activity.

The point of this PET contest isn't going to be about the pics, anyway. It's going to be about the accompanying narratives. The pics will almost be incidental. Most of the entrants could already go ahead and put their threads together right now, just from pics they already have.

Moving Sale · Post by **Moving Sale** » Mon May 04, 2009 5:22 pm

PET stands for?
Sorry I missed the memo.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Mon May 04, 2009 5:22 pm

Diego in Seattle wrote:
MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:
Diego in Seattle wrote:When will the entry period close?
May 7th.
So this contest is for the unemployed?

My fault, I originally read that more as "when does the sign up period close" for whatever reason.

However, it's your fault for asking a question that was already addressed in my initial post.

Van · Post by **Van** » Mon May 04, 2009 5:28 pm

Moving Sale wrote:PET stands for?
Sorry I missed the memo.

Photo Essay Thread. It's those threads Sam does, in rural Bama, where he takes pics of whatever and then adds his little comments to 'em.

That thread of mine, where Sam ended up gouging his eyes out after spending a night out with you (as American Psycho), that was a parody of a PET.

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Mon May 04, 2009 5:28 pm

Moving Sale wrote:PET stands for?

Poised Excessively Tall

Sorry I missed the memo.

I just never sent it to you.

-God

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Mon May 04, 2009 9:21 pm

I will win this sumbitch. Count on it.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Mon May 04, 2009 9:55 pm

*PLEASE SEE BELOW FOR OFFICIAL START/END TIMES AND CHANGES TO THE FORMAT*

-Some sort of compromise must be reached, so here’s how it’s going to go down. The contest will end on Sunday, June 14th. I understand people have lives, which is why I have given you 5 WEEKENDS to get out, take some pics, and put something together. That is ample time, not to mention all the days in between. Dragging this thing out through late July is just way too long, and it will most likely fizzle away. Sorry, Indy, I hope you have another idea on deck.

-You may post your PET any time between now and June 14th. Just know that June 14th is the deadline and any PETs posted beyond that date will not be voted on. I have revisited the idea of posting all PETs in one stickied thread, and I think that is what we’ll do so that any PETs posted eary do not get sunk to the bottom of page 2, 3, 4, etc., and forgotten about.

-Registration is no longer necessary. If you wish to submit an entry, simply post your submission in the official PET thread which will be posted later.

-Anyone who wishes to be a judge, please send me a PM. I will select 5 judges who will go through a rigorous pre-screening progress.

Thanks, I'll open it up for questions.

Van · Post by **Van** » Mon May 04, 2009 9:57 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:I will win this sumbitch. Count on it.

Possibly, since I'm not entering.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Mon May 04, 2009 11:14 pm

I have a few questions...

Are we allowed multiple entries?

If we do make multiple entries, can we change our mind later and combine them into one entry?

If we have a single entry, can we change our mind later and split it into multiple entries?

Where do babies come from?

You ever been in a cockpit before?

You ever seen a grown man naked?

Van · Post by **Van** » Mon May 04, 2009 11:22 pm

Where do babies come from?

~sheepishly raises hand~

"Ummm, cousin Betty Sue?"

Sin,

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Tue May 05, 2009 1:13 am

Well fuck. There goes my epic idea. I may still do my PET in July for the hell of it. Not sure I'm in on the real deal now. Will see if an opportunity comes up.

Van · Post by **Van** » Tue May 05, 2009 1:25 am

Indy, it's a humor contest. The locale doesn't matter. The pics don't matter. Go out and take some pics of your backyard, or your dog taking a dump, or your wife in curlers and face goo. Just go to Wal-Mart and start snappin' pics of the bizarre wildlife.

Whatever.

It's the captions, the essay portions, that are going to make the difference. Nobody is going to care about the locale. Nobody cares if they're cool vacation pics.

Clark Griswold and Dan Vogel won't be judges.

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Tue May 05, 2009 1:31 am

Van,

Since it can't happen...my idea was that since the wife and kids would be in Florida at the condo in July for 5 days, I was going to do all kinds of crazy shit I don't normally get to do. At least not back to back to back to back to back. Was gonna PET the whole damn thing.

As far as pics, I think there's gonna be a little more weight on the pics than you think. I would put 50/50 on it.

No biggie. I will see if I can come up with something. If not, won't lose any sleep ove rit.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Tue May 05, 2009 1:48 am

Let's not over complicate things. This isn't necessarily a humor contest.

The only thing that will ultimately really matter is...is it any good? Good can = funny. Good can = interesting. Good can = both funny and interesting. I will let the judges decide their own criteria in that regard, all I will ask is that a strong emphasis be placed on both the pics AND the essay portions. As for the pics themselves, the quality of the pics isn't so important as how the pics are used.

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Tue May 05, 2009 7:18 am

I'm in but I hope we get a little time to get the pics gathered as I have them scattered over about 8 comps at various locations such as home, office, etc.

Mr T · Post by **Mr T** » Tue May 05, 2009 7:49 pm

I'll judge and if i am not picked to judge i might participate.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Tue May 05, 2009 10:17 pm

I have one more spot open for a judge. PM me if you're interested.

RadioFan · Post by **RadioFan** » Wed May 06, 2009 2:07 am

Looks like the contest is under way.

http://thetrolls.net/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=4263

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Wed May 06, 2009 2:18 am

All judges have been selected. The PET thread will be posted in the next couple days.

Van · Post by **Van** » Wed May 06, 2009 2:48 am

I sure hope the ones we see here are better than the one RF linked. That one had precisely one small chuckle in the entire PET. The rest of it was just...bad. Gay, too, but not funny gay. Just gay.

Moorese and Euro need to get in on this. A PET thread is just made for those two.

Jesus, think back to Moorese's Greatest Hits thread, and the midget snorkeling, and then compare it to that juvenile garbage from Tack Hammer.

Damn.

RadioFan · Post by **RadioFan** » Wed May 06, 2009 7:46 am

I donno, Van. That thread is quite um ... Festivus.

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Wed May 06, 2009 3:02 pm

Van wrote:I sure hope the ones we see here are better than the one RF linked. That one had precisely one small chuckle in the entire PET. The rest of it was just...bad. Gay, too, but not funny gay. Just gay.

Moorese and Euro need to get in on this. A PET thread is just made for those two.

Jesus, think back to Moorese's Greatest Hits thread, and the midget snorkeling, and then compare it to that juvenile garbage from Tack Hammer.

Damn.

Oh, man. I love makin' you T1B faggots melt like soft-serve on a hot sidewalk.

Sin,

Jock Hummer

ChargerMike · Post by **ChargerMike** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:56 pm

Question,

If he's obliging, can Luther be unbanned?

Van · Post by **Van** » Wed May 06, 2009 5:27 pm

How on earth did Luther ever get banned?? Who doesn't like Luther??

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Wed May 06, 2009 5:28 pm

Luther is not banned as far as I know. If he is, it must've been a personal request from him.

ChargerMike · Post by **ChargerMike** » Wed May 06, 2009 5:37 pm

Van wrote:How on earth did Luther ever get banned?? Who doesn't like Luther??

don't know if he was actually banned but there were some rumbles with.......annie

RadioFan · Post by **RadioFan** » Wed May 06, 2009 5:37 pm

Luther is not banned.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Wed May 06, 2009 5:44 pm

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:Luther is not banned as far as I know. If he is, it must've been a personal request from him.

Re: Self Ban Requests -- Do I have to fill out a form or some shit?

ChargerMike · Post by **ChargerMike** » Wed May 06, 2009 6:15 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:
MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:Luther is not banned as far as I know. If he is, it must've been a personal request from him.
Re: Self Ban Requests -- Do I have to fill out a form or some shit?

...I'll miss your avatar

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Wed May 06, 2009 7:36 pm

The only bans I'm seeing currently are cuda and KoalaCaramel's Pubes.