that first beer on a friday

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sun Aug 30, 2009 11:56 pm

Why are the reverse beer snob haytas so bitter towards those of us with a few functioning taste buds left?

Attention RBSHs, we really don't care what you swill.

Well, we don't care near as much as you care about how much we care.

Did I get that right?

Anyway, if drinking mediocre/shitty brew makes you happy, gawd bless. I've been there. I have slammed as much beast light in my life as, well, wolfie on a good week. It's OK. I don't even look down on you like mikey does.

Those of you dumb enough to spend good beer money on the likes of heineken, I do look down on. You are a dumbasses.

TheJON · Post by **TheJON** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 12:00 am

Haha, I've had similar instances as War Wagon except the opposite. Have ordered a Miller and got a Bud Light, took one swig and nearly puked. Happened at least a handful of times. Can tell right away its a Bud Light. My taste buds are sensitive and I can pick up even a small difference in taste.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 12:09 am

TheJON wrote:Bud Light is made in St Leweeze. Actually, I can taste a big difference between the 2. Like I said, I don't drink Miller Lite that often but I don't mind it. Bud Light just has a weird taste to it that I do not like. Was at a bar a couple weeks back and they were actually giving out free Bud Light. I refused to drink it and bought a beer instead. That shit makes me wanna puke.

I can drink either...long as somebody else is paying....and it's hot out....and the beers really cold....and none of my fellow beer snobs are around to ridicule me. As for which is better/less worse? I guess I'd rather have a ML.

As for making me puke?

Sorry, but neither one of these watered down mediocre excuses for a beer has enough taste in it to get the gag reflex started. I suppose if you found one that had been lodged into the wheel well of your trunk since 1993, it might have developed a heineken level of skunkiness and might therefore get you hurling.

Beers that will get me to puke?

Busch. Head for the ~~mountains~~ toilet. That shit is wretched. It is in the rare category of no thanks, even if it's free, hot out and I'm really parched. I suppose if I was on a raft in the middle of the pacific for a few months and could no longer produce urine to drink, I might have one. I'll bet it would be better second time around after I pissed it out.

And then there's stout. Now, I realize that this is a finely crafted brew. And some hard core beer snobs love the stuff, but, sorry, I can't. I have tried. After 7 or 8 gallons of other beer to prime me, I still can't get past the first or second swallow. I guess that I'm just a beer pussy. Oh well.

TheJON · Post by **TheJON** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 12:13 am

It's amazing how much you people talk down on so many of these beers yet the CEO's of these beer companies have more money than all of us combined simply because so many people drink their beers. Amazing, isn't it? Simply amazing!

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 12:20 am

And I'll bet if you looked in that CEO's fridge, you ain't finding any BL.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Mon Aug 31, 2009 1:12 am

TheJON wrote:It's amazing how much you people talk down on so many of these beers yet the CEO's of these beer companies have more money than all of us combined simply because so many people drink their beers. Amazing, isn't it? Simply amazing!

You look down on Bud Light, don't you? I think they're doing well for themselves.

KC Scott · Post by **KC Scott** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 1:42 am

A beer war has broken out = snobs vs. the slobs.

So I used to be in the Bud / Coors lite is good enough group - then I quit drinking beer altogether and eventually moved to scotch - just from the More than 3 beers and I don't want to move syndrome that comes with advancing age.

Once in a while when I did feel like a beer with dinner (and not getting gouged $10 for a Scotch) I'd have a different beer in different places and really did notice a huge difference in taste.

From a pure taste standpoint - mine - I really like New Castle and Shiner Bock (available in you neighborhood Price Chopper) - at a $1 a beer it's worth the value.

BTW Shiner Bock is brewed in Shiner, Texas

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 1:52 am

ML has a skunky taste and smell to it. Maybe it's the extra hops they say they put in it.

Maybe...maybe not. See, the thing about craft beers is that they will tell you exactly what they use - and you'll actually taste those ingredients. That would be a devastating shock to your system, I know...

But...if you buy the crap about hops (at all) being in ML, then I have to tell you, you are sadly deluded. Have you ever tasted a hop, Wags? You think the skunky flavor is hops...nope. It's just that the shit you're drinking is sloppily brewed, bottled, and stored, and that "skunks" the beer.

And again...beer is not brewed with fucking RICE, idiots. If your beverage is brewed with rice, then you're drinking something else.

Seriously - fucking goat urine is closer to beer than any fucking BUD product.

TheJON · Post by **TheJON** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 1:56 am

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:
TheJON wrote:It's amazing how much you people talk down on so many of these beers yet the CEO's of these beer companies have more money than all of us combined simply because so many people drink their beers. Amazing, isn't it? Simply amazing!
You look down on Bud Light, don't you? I think they're doing well for themselves.

I have never said no one drinks that or ripped on anyone in here for drinking it. I said I personally just don't like it.

Many people drink Bud Light. I'm just not one of them.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Mon Aug 31, 2009 1:58 am

IndyFrisco wrote:I will say though that when spending a day doing yardwork, I hammer Miller Lites. Maybe it is the "bout like water factor". I dunno. But no way could I spend the day mowing/edging/weedeating/picking weeds/cuttin branches/etc. while gulping down a heavier beer. No chance in hell. But I can drink 15 Miller Lites and not feel a damn thing. It's more about refreshment on a day like that than taste. I don't think it tastes awful, nor great. Just enough to satisfy my thirst.

"Refreshment" ??? :?

Doesn't alcohol cause dehydration? How in the heck are you still standing after sweating your ass off doing yardwork all day and pounding 15 beers? This isn't computing for me. Is there any alcohol in Miller Lite?

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Mon Aug 31, 2009 2:01 am

mvscal wrote:I'd have to go with Negra...

Tease.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 3:08 am

PSUFAN wrote:
ML has a skunky taste and smell to it. Maybe it's the extra hops they say they put in it.
Maybe...maybe not. See, the thing about craft beers is that they will tell you exactly what they use - and you'll actually taste those ingredients. That would be a devastating shock to your system, I know...

But...if you buy the crap about hops (at all) being in ML, then I have to tell you, you are sadly deluded. Have you ever tasted a hop, Wags? You think the skunky flavor is hops...nope. It's just that the shit you're drinking is sloppily brewed, bottled, and stored, and that "skunks" the beer.

And again...beer is not brewed with fucking RICE, idiots. If your beverage is brewed with rice, then you're drinking something else.

Is rice not also a grain, not much different from barley? What's your problem with rice? And what's your problem with anyone that likes it? Does that somehow affront your sense of beerness, that Budweiser controls 50% of the domestic market?

It most definitely is a beer, says so right on the can, with alcohol and hops included.

Dr_Phibes · Post by **Dr_Phibes** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 3:59 am

It's also not so much what you drink, but what you're drinking out of.

Tankards for slobs

Glasses for snobs

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 3:50 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:
IndyFrisco wrote:I will say though that when spending a day doing yardwork, I hammer Miller Lites. Maybe it is the "bout like water factor". I dunno. But no way could I spend the day mowing/edging/weedeating/picking weeds/cuttin branches/etc. while gulping down a heavier beer. No chance in hell. But I can drink 15 Miller Lites and not feel a damn thing. It's more about refreshment on a day like that than taste. I don't think it tastes awful, nor great. Just enough to satisfy my thirst.
"Refreshment" ??? :?

Doesn't alcohol cause dehydration? How in the heck are you still standing after sweating your ass off doing yardwork all day and pounding 15 beers? This isn't computing for me. Is there any alcohol in Miller Lite?

As I said, it's basically water. If there's any alcohol in it, it sure as hell isn't having any effect on me.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Mon Aug 31, 2009 5:37 pm

I'm gonna buy a 40 oz of Miller Lite on the way home from work and shotgun it right in the liquor store parking lot. If there's little/no alcohol in it, I should not hurl. I will report back with my findings this evening.....

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 9:30 pm

War Wagon wrote:What's your problem with rice?

I have no problem with rice itself, simpleton. "Beer" is not brewed with rice.

My problem is with those who brew cheap-ass shit concoctions with genetically modified rice and then call it "Beer".

What do you have against "beer" that you would encourage this approach, you fucking smegsucker?

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 10:14 pm

PSUFAN wrote: "Beer" is not brewed with rice.

Sure it is. Like I said, it says so right on the can. Are you accusing AB of false advertising and with mislabeling their product? Careful, there might be a libel lawyer or six lurking about.

What do you have against "beer" that you would encourage this approach, you fucking smegsucker?

Nothing that millions of other don't, apparently. Tell ya' what, you go ahead and partake of whatever swill you enjoy and I'll do the same. Fair enough, semenbelcher?

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 11:17 pm

it says so right on the can.

bwahahahaha! Fucking idiot sheeple. Millions like you can't be wrong, eh? How'd that work out for you in late 30s Germany?

Here's a question, you godawful moron - is there any ingredient you might not want to see in your "beer"? If genetically modified rice is cool by you - just because it's cheap to brew with - why not try a little dust, or asbestos, or deer shit?

A beverage made with rice CANNOT be beer, asshair maven.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 11:23 pm

PSUFAN wrote:
Here's a question, you godawful moron - is there any ingredient you might not want to see in your "beer"? If genetically modified rice is cool by you - just because it's cheap to brew with - why not try a little dust, or asbestos, or deer shit?

LOL...how about bear whiz?

TheJON · Post by **TheJON** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 11:30 pm

why not try a little dust, or asbestos, or deer shit?

I think you just gave m2 dinner ideas for tonight.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 12:03 am

PSUFAN wrote: Here's a question, you godawful moron - is there any ingredient you might not want to see in your "beer"? If genetically modified rice is cool by you - just because it's cheap to brew with...

Who says its cheap? You? Are you privy to the cost comparisons of the various ingredients and processes of what it takes to brew a best selling beer, you shit stained prancing fairy?

That's right, whatever swill you drink makes you shit your drawers, take pictures of it, and show it off to buncha' guys you don't know on the internet, and I'm the moron?

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:16 am

PSUFAN wrote:
Seriously - fucking goat urine is closer to beer than any fucking BUD product.

We'll take your word on that one slappy.

Would it matter though if said goat subsisted on a diet of genetically modified rice?

TheJON · Post by **TheJON** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:18 am

Would it matter though if said goat subsisted on a diet of genetically modified rice?

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:24 am

Things that should be made of rice:

rice pilaf
rice pudding
flied lice
saki
pretty much any chink dish

TheJON · Post by **TheJON** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:26 am

What about Rice-aroni???

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:28 am

yeah, we'll allow rice a roni.

TheJON · Post by **TheJON** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:34 am

smackaholic wrote:yeah, we'll allow rice a roni.

It's the only San Francisco treat m2 will ever be able to afford, so this is a good thing.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:41 am

IndyFrisco wrote:
ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:
IndyFrisco wrote:I will say though that when spending a day doing yardwork, I hammer Miller Lites. Maybe it is the "bout like water factor". I dunno. But no way could I spend the day mowing/edging/weedeating/picking weeds/cuttin branches/etc. while gulping down a heavier beer. No chance in hell. But I can drink 15 Miller Lites and not feel a damn thing. It's more about refreshment on a day like that than taste. I don't think it tastes awful, nor great. Just enough to satisfy my thirst.
"Refreshment" ??? :?

Doesn't alcohol cause dehydration? How in the heck are you still standing after sweating your ass off doing yardwork all day and pounding 15 beers? This isn't computing for me. Is there any alcohol in Miller Lite?
As I said, it's basically water. If there's any alcohol in it, it sure as hell isn't having any effect on me.

IF, man of steel, immune to the laws of 5% alcohol weight by volume.

Or full of shit.

You decide.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 2:49 am

War Wagon wrote:
weight by volume.

Nice work there wags. You obviously weren't a physics major.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 2:52 am

Mikey wrote:
War Wagon wrote:
weight by volume.
Nice work there wags. You obviously weren't a physics major.

I wonder what diet piss light's weight by voltage is?

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 2:53 am

Mikey

After you get done schooling me on alcohol weight by volume, do tell...

Are you having any fun yet?

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 2:54 am

7.6 ohms

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 2:56 am

War Wagon wrote:Mikey

After you get done schooling me on alcohol weight by volume, do tell...

Are you having any fun yet?

Are you kidding me?

I'm always having fun, especially when I'm complaining that I never have any fun. That's the funnest shit yet.
In fact I'd estimate it's about 2.7 fundals per slug volume.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 2:58 am

Mikey wrote:7.6 ohms

Close.

It's 76.0 farads. You forgot to carry the zero and convert to the proper incorrect unit of measure.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 3:01 am

smackaholic wrote: I wonder what diet piss light's weight by voltage is?

Divide infinity by your desire to wreck Jess's starfish, subtract two aspirin, add 100 mg. of Viagara and there's your answer.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 3:03 am

Since we'er doing physics tonight.......

A skrawny forklift driver has a little too much weight by volume fermented rice beverage for lunch and drives off the loading dock.

What is his unladen terminal velocity?

Would it be different if KCPaul was driving?

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 3:05 am

War Wagon wrote:
smackaholic wrote: I wonder what diet piss light's weight by voltage is?
Divide infinity by your desire to wreck Jess's starfish, subtract two aspirin, add 100 mg. of Viagara and there's your answer.

Anything divided by infinity equals, in scientific terms, something real tiny.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 3:08 am

Whoops, my reading comp is a little off.

Infinity divided by anything is infinity or "really fukking huge".

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 3:09 am

Seriously wags, if'n you're interested...

You can express alcohol content by weight or by volume, not weight by volume. Weight and volume are two different things.

Water is denser than alcohol so a fixed volume of water will weigh more than the same volume of alcohol.

Beer that is 5% alcohol by volume (the standard measure, I think) will be somewhat less by weight.

There. See how smart I am?

BTW...Mace and his shit beer drinking buddies are definitely light weight. High volume though, probably.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 3:11 am

Mikey wrote:
War Wagon wrote:Mikey

After you get done schooling me on alcohol weight by volume, do tell...

Are you having any fun yet?
Are you kidding me?

I'm always having fun, especially when I'm complaining that I never have any fun. That's the funnest shit yet.
In fact I'd estimate it's about 2.7 fundals per slug volume.

Fundals is a pretty vague unit of measure, especially if you've been drinking, so using 2.7 is inferring more precision than you actually have. I believe the proper term wuld have been "coupl'a fundals, giv'r take".