Santa's naughty list

Dasher · Post by **Dasher** » Fri Dec 18, 2009 7:35 am

Criteria: Dumbfuckery

Kevnic - Plungers vacay in his asshole like it's a timeshare at the Hamptons. And when they're through his colon looks like a wreckaged battleground at The Five Points. His anus gapes so wide AP crashed there for a couple weeks. He used a turd knocked loose from deer hooves as a murphy bed.

War Wagon - Couldn't think-up a decent take if you forklifted it into his dome. Hasn't read a single piece of literature since a Hyster instruction manual. Can't come to grips with the fact the only bat and balls his daughter will ever fancy are on a softball field.

Mad Russian - He fears big words and things you can't pull a gun on. Thinks a dictionary is a male medical problem. Enjoys his gun collection because he can't shoot his own.

to be continued...

Plato · Post by **Plato** » Fri Dec 18, 2009 8:33 am

Rack! Those people undoubtedly serve society just above the minimum wage line. Losers one and all.

Diego in Seattle - Q: What's better than an 18 yr old? A: Two 9 yr olds. The next thing I want to read with his name attached to it is his obituary.

JMak - About as creative as an auto parts store accountant. BORING. His hand falls asleep during masturbation. Dreams he's being paid by the word to belch out continual shit takes. Right wing talking points simpleton.

Felix - Flamer. Wants cock so badly that he trolled the boards as a female poster. OMFG, is that funny or just plain creepy? Made up a fake ticket contest in hopes of personally meeting a male board member. This guy is a strange one.

KC Paul - Surfs sports message board for takes to steal and then put up elsewhere as his own. WTF? hahaha
This lump of stocking coal is unhealthy and stupid. He has no self respect or dignity. Live, stay, and die in KC, fat pig loser.

Donder · Post by **Donder** » Fri Dec 18, 2009 1:13 pm

Atomic Punk - First "Rome Board" poster to come out of the closet. Okay, hey, if that's your little personal thing. But then he went psycho when mocking came a knocking. His wack accusations flung off in every direction revealed him to be as stable as balloon boy's dad. Nearing 50 with no career, he's a hall of fame loser, drunk, and dumbfuck.

Samurai Gangbang - Got worked by TWIS in the 2008 smack off and then melted down for days when the judges accurately determined that he had his ass handed to him. Since then he's sulked over in his own internet corner at .net, jacking off with his 74 childish baseball trolls and endless rank 'em threads - circa 2003. A pitiful dipshit and overall internet failure.

Wolfman - His posts smell like mothballs. His claim to fame is that he once called in to talk to Jim Rome. That's stupid. Got jaked out of 15 bucks by BSmack and that fact alone has to put one at or near the head of the dumbfuck table. Regularly sits on the can for hours working his NY Times crossword puzzle to avoid having to interact with his wife - who would make Barbara Bush look hot.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Fri Dec 18, 2009 5:17 pm

childish baseball troll

'sup, iaa?

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Fri Dec 18, 2009 10:32 pm

lk_pick - "your love is like baaaaad medicine, bad medicine is what I need"

eccf - had a deep affection for children...across state lines. Apparently, that's a felony.

KC Scott - the tragic last captain of the S.S. LOL. Hit an iceberg. He thought it was funny.

KC Scott · Post by **KC Scott** » Sat Dec 19, 2009 1:40 am

Blitzen wrote: KC Scott - the tragic last captain of the S.S. LOL. Hit an iceberg. He thought it was funny.

Yea Baby - $50, 450,000 hits and 1,400+ Diggs later and I'm still laughing: http://www.cracked.com/funny-2130-oral-sex/

Donder · Post by **Donder** » Sun Dec 20, 2009 6:17 am

Lillian Vernon - Obsessive internet stalking loon sister of SG. A tedious and irrelevant poster with some kind of kooky axe to grind with mvscal. Couldn't be more transparent, though, as she wishes to be laid down and plowed deeply into a quivering mass of submission by him.

Toddowen - Anyone who speaks to this board of killing himself should. A middle of the night poster who is either a 3rd shift working loser or a mother's basement living retard with no redeeming value. When not speaking of killing himself, he posts aberrant takes that a person needs to be on mushrooms to understand.

Plato · Post by **Plato** » Sun Dec 20, 2009 11:03 pm

Diogenes - Scroll wheel Hall of Fame. Incapable of posting a fresh or original thought. Dude looks like he goes to the river to take a bath once a month - you saw his pic? HAHAHA Trailer park material. Get a shower and a haircut, son.

BarFlie - Entirely dull. A zero. Other than for the sake of laughing at the realization that there are people like him in the world, a useless poster. Lowlife. Bragged of planning a trip to Asia to bang under age whores. Will probably end up incarcerated.

Dasher · Post by **Dasher** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:06 am

Political Operative - Lusts after and stalks members of the Chinese women's curling team. Only thing stopping him from going Ted Bundy on these chinkwhores is that pesky little thing called a "wife."

Eddie Munster - Just a fucking horrendous poster. Truly awful. I'd like to play Dance Dance Revolution on his epiglottis.

Political Operative · Post by **Political Operative** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:33 am

Dasher wrote:Political Operative - Lusts after and stalks members of the Chinese women's curling team. Only thing stopping him from going Ted Bundy on these chinkwhores is that pesky little thing called a "wife."

IS Santa so f'n lazy that he gets his slave labour to do his list checking? Get your facts straight Dasher... It's not members of the Chinese womens curling team, It's the Beloved.

If I see you, I will shoot you, eat your heart raw and grill up some reindeer steaks a la Doug near DC

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 6:09 am

TVO - Vile, vapid, balding trust fund twat who used to say 5'9 was near average for a man, then started to claim he's 5'10. His midget features and abnormal brain functions fail him when he to claim he isn't that short. He has no purpose in life but to let KC Paul know he still has feet. The type of dipshit who sends his old car to the scrapyard to buy a hybrid made of mostly plastic so he can pat himself on the back for "being green".

Irie Lagos- Long term meth use has fried the nerves in his brain that affect reason. That is the only explanation for thinking that telling a story about watching his drug dealer slide his cock in and out of his wife and getting a close enough look to measure it was a good idea. Spending time away from his children to fight to legalize a plant is probably the best thing he could do as a parent. Shaker.

Atomic Punk · Post by **Atomic Punk** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 7:03 am

This is honestly the BEST reindeer year yet. This is funnay this time! Brutal AND funnay!!!

edit: Oh DonderIAA, Vixen apparently married a "man" and has a family now. Good for her, sucks for you. Yeah, being a nurse is "no career" as you say you fucking twat. Update your spreadsheet you freak. What a fucking pussy you are.

Plato · Post by **Plato** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 12:44 pm

Notice how obedient most of the shit posters have become? They take their lashing and don't back sass because they know that the word of the reindeer is law. Fear the deer.

KC Snot wanted to offer some lip but only because it was an opportunity to do as he always does and brag about his supposed money. $50 for winning a contest at a kid site. Wow. You're like 'the man' and everything.

Finally getting your well worked ass off your butt buddy's couch to become male nurse when approaching 50 isn't exactly highlight reel material, Anatomically Punked. Don't forget to pick up your parting gift.

Here are a few more dumbfucks that should be recognized.

TIGRDOG - Religious cult member and faithful Art Bell listener. LMAO. I thought that show was for 11 yr olds and psycho ward shut-ins. TIGR only chimes in when a government conspiracy thread shows up on a board, and his contribution is generally equal to a pile of dogshit in your front yard. His wife left him because he didn't satisfy. Go figure.

General Peters - .net cult hero for detailing endless ways that a middle aged man can whack off to teen girls. A comprehensive life loser and it speaks volumes of the board that the .net monkey cage is exhilarated by his every shit post.

Roger_the_Shrubber - Crippled both physically and mentally. A whining little douchebag. If the boards were Euro soccer, Shrubber would be one of those 'flopper' faggots who fall as if struck by lightning when touched by an opposing player. I'd pay money to see Elizabeth Lambert kick the shit out of this dumb twat in front of his family.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 1:35 pm

The boss has made a few roster updates.

Russ in SacTown- Look, getting that credit card stealing whore out of his life wasn't exactly a bad thing. However, having your bitch with some mvscal she just met that you invited into your house reaches John Bobbit levels of losing your manhood. Unlike Bobbit, his "oh well, good riddance" faggot act after proved he chose not to sew his dick back on. Santa has no time for some pussy who only wants another message board to ban people on for Christmas.

Stucknut- All of them. Unreadable band of retards. The only way you can get a username at that fagpit is if you can prove that you can fart rainbows. Case in point: The manliest poster to come from that internet bathhouse married a rhino and shaves his own twat. The big guy ain't delivering packages over there. Last thing he wants is to get pulled over for having a bunch of butt plugs and penis pacifiers falling out of the sleigh.

Dasher · Post by **Dasher** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 3:02 pm

Political Operative wrote:Get your facts straight Dasher... It's not members of the Chinese womens curling team, It's the Beloved.

The "beloved?" WTF, get some help dude. You sound like Gollum waxing about his precious. Your family must be so proud you're spending all this time and money lusting after a chick that looks too young for Diego. I'd rip your nuts off on Christmas Eve but I'm pretty sure your old lady is gonna beat me to it.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 3:18 pm

Plato wrote:Incapable of posting a fresh or original thought.

You wouldn't recognize originality if it skullfucked you up the ass all night long, troll.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:10 pm

Diogenes wrote:
Plato wrote:Incapable of posting a fresh or original thought.
You wouldn't recognize originality if it skullfucked you up the ass all night long, troll.

Sweet multi-tarding skills on display here... sending a shout out to KC while reinforcing the troll's original take. All in one shitty sentence.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:13 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:
Diogenes wrote:
Plato wrote:Incapable of posting a fresh or original thought.
You wouldn't recognize originality if it skullfucked you up the ass all night long, troll.

Sweet multi-tarding skills on display here... sending a shout out to KC while reinforcing the troll's original take. All in one shitty sentence.

EAD, faggot.

The fact is, I'm the most original individual to ever post on these here pages. Just because everything I say goes over your fucking head doesn't make it any less existentially sublime.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:18 pm

Diogenes wrote:
The fact is, I'm the most original individual to ever post on these here pages.[/b]

Yeah.

You cut and paste other people's work from Wikipedia and "Little Green Footballs" with the skill of a surgeon.

RACK your "originality"...

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:21 pm

Martyred wrote:RACK your "originality"...

Good call.

I kind of skipped over the rest of that shit.

Vixen · Post by **Vixen** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:40 pm

Atomic Punk wrote:edit: Oh DonderIAA, Vixen apparently married a "man" and has a family now. Good for her, sucks for you. Yeah, being a nurse is "no career" as you say you fucking twat. Update your spreadsheet you freak. What a fucking pussy you are.

The fuck, you say? You keep my name off your fingers, you dirty filthy gape. What would I do with a "man" when I have all this deer schlong to keep me warm?

And nurse or no nurse, I can't imagine anyone letting you within 100 ft. of a medical facility without trying to admit you, you damaged collection of human debris. Just shove your deformed skull back up your ass where it has a better chance of avoiding further incident for the next week, you internet drama seeking mongoloid.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:49 pm

Diogenes wrote:The fact is, I'm the most original individual to ever post on these here pages. Just because everything I say goes over your fucking head doesn't make it any less existentially sublime.

I Know You Are But What Am I is neither "original" nor "over" anyone's head, even TVO's.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:06 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:I Know You Are But What Am I

If you say so, Bitch.

Dasher · Post by **Dasher** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:12 pm

Diotard Is Coming To Town

You better watch out
You better scroll by
Better X out
I'm telling you why
Diotard is coming to town

He's making a drink
And stirring it twice
Gonna fag it up with cosmos on ice
Diotard is coming to town

He posts when you are sleeping
He posts when you're awake
He makes another girly drink
So he can bang out more shit takes

Oh, you better watch out
You better scroll by
Better X out
I'm telling you why
Diotard is coming to town

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:17 pm

Dasher wrote:
He's making a drink
And stirring it twice
Gonna fag it up with cosmos on ice
Diotard is coming to town

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:20 pm

Dasher wrote:

Diotard Is Coming To Town

He posts when you are sleeping
He posts when you're awake
He makes another girly drink
So he can bang out more shit takes

~tears~

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:46 pm

Outstanding.

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:48 pm

Away In A Garage

Away in a garage,
his foot on the gas
His Honda's in idle
toddowen will pass

The douchetards at One Board
Looked down where He lay
The fuckwit toddowen
brought joy on this day

After years of his taunting
Many threads gone to TROTS
This flatlining jizzrag
Has at last called his shot

In the eyes of Charles Darwin
We are all one less fag
No one will mourn him
Now zip up the bag

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 6:04 pm

Cupid wrote:Stucknut- All of them. Unreadable band of retards. The only way you can get a username at that fagpit is if you can prove that you can fart rainbows. Case in point: The manliest poster to come from that internet bathhouse married a rhino and shaves his own twat. The big guy ain't delivering packages over there. Last thing he wants is to get pulled over for having a bunch of butt plugs and penis pacifiers falling out of the sleigh.

RACK

The Reindeer are on FIRE this year. :D

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 6:08 pm

Atomic Punk wrote:This is honestly the BEST reindeer year yet. This is funnay this time! Brutal AND funnay!!!

edit: Oh DonderIAA, Vixen apparently married a "man" and has a family now. Good for her, sucks for you. Yeah, being a nurse is "no career" as you say you fucking twat. Update your spreadsheet you freak. What a fucking pussy you are.

Wait. I thought you were still in school to be a nurse? Are you finished already?

Van · Post by **Van** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 6:17 pm

Dasher wrote:Diotard Is Coming To Town

You better watch out
You better scroll by
Better X out
I'm telling you why
Diotard is coming to town

He's making a drink
And stirring it twice
Gonna fag it up with cosmos on ice
Diotard is coming to town

He posts when you are sleeping
He posts when you're awake
He makes another girly drink
So he can bang out more shit takes

Oh, you better watch out
You better scroll by
Better X out
I'm telling you why
Diotard is coming to town

That right there was one of the most effective song parodies ever.

One fuckuva strong showing this year by the Blessed Reindeer.

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 7:32 pm

Luther The Ex-Cop
(Frosty The Snowman)

Luther the ex-cop was a snivelling little bitch
When the smack was dropped, then off he'd hop
To the mods where he would snitch.

Luther the ex-cop set our PM box on fire
He tried to hang, couldn't get our slang
And you know he'd wear a wire.

There must have been some magic in that
Old .net he found
For when he logged into that place
He knew he was safe and sound.

O, Luther the ex-cop
Can only hang with tards
Where Shrubber spams, and SG crams...
...all his stupid baseball cards.

Spammety spam spam
Spammety spam spam
Look at Luther bail
Spammety spam spam
Spammety spam spam
His act was getting stale

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 7:36 pm

Blitzen wrote: O, Luther the ex-cop
Can only hang with tards
Where Shrubber spams, and SG crams...
...all his stupid baseball cards.

Spammety spam spam
Spammety spam spam
Look at Luther bail
Spammety spam spam
Spammety spam spam
His act was getting stale

RACK

I think ol' Luther is at Mag7 & Stucknut solely now.

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 8:21 pm

Katy wrote:
Blitzen wrote: O, Luther the ex-cop
Can only hang with tards
Where Shrubber spams, and SG crams...
...all his stupid baseball cards.

Spammety spam spam
Spammety spam spam
Look at Luther bail
Spammety spam spam
Spammety spam spam
His act was getting stale

RACK

I think ol' Luther is at Mag7 & Stucknut solely now.

That's sad... those places pretty well are the suck. Fun for about five minutes but the trolling gets old after a bit with them.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 8:29 pm

Agreed.

Mag7 isn't so bad, but Stucknut is unbearable. I prefer plowing the corn from SN's collective colons on occasion or when I'm bored. The majority of those tards over at Stucknut think I'm the Lillian Vernon character. I don't care enough to correct them, I just let them carry on.

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 8:44 pm

Katy wrote:Agreed.

Mag7 isn't so bad, but Stucknut is unbearable. I prefer plowing the corn from SN's collective colons on occasion or when I'm bored. The majority of those tards over at Stucknut think I'm the Lillian Vernon character. I don't care enough to correct them, I just let them carry on.

I did a lot of trolling on Mag7 while they had the football team. I went over the top with SCS but my trolls were well liked. Poor saps never realized who my trolls were except one when I screwed up on the logout and log in under SCS. Like most places that survive on jackassery with no substance it gets old quickly if you have a mentality great than that of a high school student.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 8:48 pm

SunCoastSooner wrote:
Katy wrote:Agreed.

Mag7 isn't so bad, but Stucknut is unbearable. I prefer plowing the corn from SN's collective colons on occasion or when I'm bored. The majority of those tards over at Stucknut think I'm the Lillian Vernon character. I don't care enough to correct them, I just let them carry on.

I did a lot of trolling on Mag7 while they had the football team. I went over the top with SCS but my trolls were well liked. Poor saps never realized who my trolls were except one when I screwed up on the logout and log in under SCS. Like most places that survive on jackassery with no substance it gets old quickly if you have a mentality great than that of a high school student.

Again, I couldn't agree more. Stucknut gets a visit from me at least once a month. It gets the locals like Kid Nashville pretty upset. Russ and Tigrdog always out me because they're busy gargling SN's balls right now because they want to be accepted. I'm not IP banned from SN now, but I never go there under my normal IP. Too many fucking weirdos reside there.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 9:15 pm

Cupid wrote:
Russ in SacTown- Look, getting that credit card stealing whore out of his life wasn't exactly a bad thing. However, having your bitch with some mvscal she just met that you invited into your house reaches John Bobbit levels of losing your manhood. Unlike Bobbit, his "oh well, good riddance" faggot act after proved he chose not to sew his dick back on. Santa has no time for some pussy who only wants another message board to ban people on for Christmas.

It's his party and he'll cry if he wants to.

Vixen · Post by **Vixen** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 11:48 pm

Katy wrote:Stucknut gets a visit from me at least once a month. It gets the locals like Kid Nashville pretty upset. Russ and Tigrdog always out me because they're busy gargling SN's balls right now because they want to be accepted. I'm not IP banned from SN now, but I never go there under my normal IP.

Whoa. You sound like one bad ass menstrual cycle, little missy. It's charming the way you describe your antics at other boards, here......for all of us to gather. Really.

Maybe this weekend, after shutyomouth's "skinnier" twin is done working us within death's reach, whats say you send those brats of yours out to chase parked cars for the night, and you and I get our "scissor" on?

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Mon Dec 21, 2009 11:51 pm

Vixen wrote:...and you and I get our "scissor" on?