Jury Duty

[Mikey]

Been doing jury duty for the past two days. I've been summoned a bunch of times but this is the first time I've ever actually gotten on a jury.

It's a pretty small potatoes trial, but still interesting. I'll post more about it once I've convinced the 11 iodots on the jury to vote the same way I'm going to.

[jiminphilly]

T1b challenge- associate each juror with their T1b counterpart

Juror #10- Ed Begley/Mvscal

[Mikey]

Pretty sure I'd be Oscar Madison.

[Dinsdale]

Pretty sure you'd be the fat bald one.

[Mikey]

Pretty sure you'd be the fat bald one.

You always were original.

I guess that would make you the drunk loudmouth know-it-all.

[Dinsdale]

Pretty sure you'd be the fat bald one.

You always were original.

I guess that would make you the drunk loudmouth know-it-all.

On a board where Goober posts, you're coming at me with that?

[Mikey]

Pretty sure you'd be the fat bald one.

You always were original.

I guess that would make you the drunk loudmouth know-it-all.

On a board where Goober posts, you're coming at me with that?

OK then, one of them.

[Atomic Punk]

For many years I got the Jury Duty Summons when I was in the Navy and wrote back that I'm deployed overseas. After a few years they stopped summoning me. When I became a teacher this fat bitch that had jury duty went in and told them my story and I've been summoned ever since.

You can defer, but the trick is to pick your date around Thanksgiving. You'll thank me later when you figure out why that is a very good time to be available.

[R-Jack]

I made a mention in the Casey Anthony thread that we bitch about how that stupid jury let that slunt off, but then again these were people who were too stupid to get out of jury duty. We piss and moan about it, but if we do all we can to not do jury duty when our turn comes around, how much right do we have to get angry at the jury they ended up with?

I take jury duty as seriously as everything else I take in life. That may be the reason I never get selected, but I still go if summoned.

[mvscal]

You can defer, but the trick is to pick your date around Thanksgiving.

Uh, no. The "trick" is to throw your summons in the trash. They'll manage just fine without you.

[jiminphilly]

That may be the reason I never get selected..

You're white and presumably have a set of balls though I may ask KCScrotum inspector to check on that for me. Bottom line though is you probably wouldn't have been selected as a juror given race and gender for a capital murder case.

[Terry in Crapchester]

That may be the reason I never get selected..

You're white and presumably have a set of balls though I may ask KCScrotum inspector to check on that for me. Bottom line though is you probably wouldn't have been selected as a juror given race and gender for a capital murder case.

Depends on where you live. With limited peremptories, round these parts it's inevitable you'll have a lot of whites on a jury, if not an all-white jury. A defense attorney who manages to get one person of color on his jury ought to thank his lucky stars.

My first felony trial was an Assault 2 with a black female client. I managed to get one black female on the jury. I almost fainted dead away when that happened.

[R-Jack]

My first felony trial was an Assault 2 with a black female client. I managed to get one black female on the jury. I almost fainted dead away when that happened.

You probably had jsc on the other side, as he was probably too busy being loaded onto a gurney to notice.

[Terry in Crapchester]

My first felony trial was an Assault 2 with a black female client. I managed to get one black female on the jury. I almost fainted dead away when that happened.

You probably had jsc on the other side, as he was probably too busy being loaded onto a gurney to notice.

Not quite, but . . .

She was selected before lunch time. When we came back from lunch, the DA tried to get her taken off the jury panel, ostensibly on the grounds that she made eye contact with my client, and therefore, they must know each other. I'm guessing he had lunch with some fellow DA's, discussed jury selection with them, and they said, "You let WHO on the jury?" The judge denied his motion, fortunately (and somewhat surprisingly, since that judge usually is a rubber stamp for the DA's office).

Later that day, another black female got called into the jury panel. The DA tried to challenge her for cause on the grounds that she had had a misdemeanor prostitution conviction 25 years earlier. I objected once again, and the judge (again, surprisingly) sustained my objection. The DA then used a peremptory challenge on her, I objected on Batson grounds, but this time the judge ruled that he had race-neutral reasons for excluding her.

No matter in the end, my client got acquitted.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

I managed to get one black female on the jury.

Did you manage this feat the same way you fetched yourself a wife... by tossing a bucket of Extra Crispy at her?

[BSmack]

You can defer, but the trick is to pick your date around Thanksgiving. You'll thank me later when you figure out why that is a very good time to be available.

No, the trick is to have a job that pays you for jury duty. Unfortunately, the one time I had a chance of being empaneled as a juror, I was working for a company that would not pay me for the time I was on jury duty. Ergo, I had to use my wits to find a way out.

You see, the trial was in the Federal Court here in Rochester. The plaintiff was a scumbag convicted felon who was alleging that 3 prison guards used his face as a speed bag. What's more, the prison guards were being represented by attorneys from the NY Attorney General's office. Which meant that the guards were indemnified from any financial responsibility regardless of the verdict.

That was all the ammo I needed.

I waited and sure enough, the plaintiff's attorney started to ask each individual juror if they had a moral issue with awarding money to a felon. When the ambulance chaser got to me, I told him that I had no particular issue with the awarding of damages to a felon, but that in this case the fact that the damages would be coming out of my tax dollars that I did wonder if I could rule without conflict of interest. I also suggested that the proper place for this trial be out of state, as those jurors would not in any way be tainted.

Well that caused a bit of a problem. The plaintiff's attorney and the AG guys had a confab with Judge Larimer. Then I got called up to Judge Larimer's bench and he proceeded to explain to me that the LAW required that I act like a complete dipshit and not worry about where the money was coming from for damages. He then asked if I felt as if I could properly perform my obligations as a juror with this in mind. I told him I would try "to the best of my ability" to follow his directives.

Needless to say, the plaintiff's attorney wasted no time striking me from that jury. I was out of the courtroom just before lunch. I ran into the attorney from the AGs office and he complimented me on one of the more unique ways of getting out of jury duty he had ever seen. I told him that if the law made sense, I never would have been able to pull it off.

[poptart]

I had to use my wits

[BSmack]

I'm not balding. Otherwise it is an accurate representation of what would happen were I stupid enough to get on a skateboard.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

I was working for a company that would not pay me for the time I was on jury duty. Ergo, I had to use my wits to find a way out.

You're a total dumbfuck if you couldn't find a 'way out' before ending up at the courthouse. When I was younger and lived in CT, I used to just throw 'em in the garbage... no issues. But they'd send them every couple of years. It got to be annoying...

The last couple of times (both happened after I moved and had popped up on some county's radar) I had the pleasure of replying back to the state of MA on-line. I told them "I moved moved out of the county" (back to CT.) In both instances, I've never received a follow up summons from the county.

[BSmack]

I was working for a company that would not pay me for the time I was on jury duty. Ergo, I had to use my wits to find a way out.

You're a total dumbfuck if you couldn't find a 'way out' before ending up at the courthouse. When I was younger and lived in CT, I used to just throw 'em in the garbage... no issues. But they'd send them every couple of years. It got to be annoying...

The last couple of times (both happened after I moved and had popped up on some county's radar) I had the pleasure of replying back to the state of MA on-line. I told them "I moved moved out of the county" (back to CT.) In both instances, I've never received a follow up summons from the county.

I preferred to give the justice system a fair chance at me. The net result was that I missed no work time, got a check from the feds for my half day's work that paid for a nice lunch downtown and have a great story to tell. It was a win win win situation.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

The net result was that I missed no work time.

You didn't get to work until after you had lunch downtown and you still missed zero time? :?

[BSmack]

The net result was that I missed no work time.

You didn't get to work until after you had lunch downtown and you still missed zero time? :?

I was managing a scrap metal yard. My boss told me as long as I made up the time I wouldn't get docked. As I recall, I pulled a Saturday shift and all was good.

[jiminphilly]

I'm not balding. Otherwise it is an accurate representation of what would happen were I stupid enough to get on a skateboard.

So you're fat and kinda retarded?

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

I was managing a scrap metal yard. My boss told me as long as I made up the time I wouldn't get docked. As I recall, I pulled a Saturday shift and all was good.

Dude. If you had to make up the time, then it's still time lost in my book. And on a Saturday to boot.

[Goober McTuber]

Pretty sure you'd be the fat bald one.

You always were original.

I guess that would make you the drunk loudmouth know-it-all.

On a board where Goober posts, you're coming at me with that?

This looks like some kind of preemptive double-reverse Kansas City IKIABICYOF kind of maneuver, but I appreciate the consideration. I’m sure you out-drunk me many times over, and I’m not at all loud, but to be placed in the same league as Dinsdale in the know-it-all category, that’s truly humbling. Sniff, sniff.

[BSmack]

I was managing a scrap metal yard. My boss told me as long as I made up the time I wouldn't get docked. As I recall, I pulled a Saturday shift and all was good.

Dude. If you had to make up the time, then it's still time lost in my book. And on a Saturday to boot.

It was a shitty job. I was on salary and probably would have had to go in Saturday anyway. As long as I showed 40 or more hours, the boss was fine with me missing a half day on Monday to weasel my way out of jury duty.

BTW: This was a Federal trial, not a municipal court delio. I'm not sure how the feds handle folks who blow them off and I wasn't about to find out the hard way.

[Goober McTuber]

I was managing a scrap metal yard. My boss told me as long as I made up the time I wouldn't get docked. As I recall, I pulled a Saturday shift and all was good.

Dude. If you had to make up the time, then it's still time lost in my book. And on a Saturday to boot.

It was a shitty job. I was on salary and probably would have had to go in Saturday anyway. As long as I showed 40 or more hours, the boss was fine with me missing a half day on Monday to weasel my way out of jury duty.

BTW: This was a Federal trial, not a municipal court delio. I'm not sure how the feds handle folks who blow them off and I wasn't about to find out the hard way.

In every salaried position I’ve had (and I’ve had several), I never had trouble taking off time as needed, because the understanding was that when necessary I’d be there. Regardless of how many hours I had already worked that week. That’s what a salaried position is all about.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

In every salaried position I’ve had (and I’ve had several), I never had trouble taking off time as needed, because the understanding was that when necessary I’d be there. Regardless of how many hours I had already worked that week. That’s what a salaried position is all about.

^^^This.
For example, this morning I had to go to court to fight a ticket (which I won.) I rolled in to the office about 3.5 hours later than I normally do.
I don't plan on staying later than usual tonight, working any more than I normally do on a weekend, or taking time off to account for me not being here. Same thing when I have a dentist/MD appt, have to pick up my kid at daycare, or whatever. You know why... because over the course of the year I'll still average 45-50 hours/week of work and kick fucking ass while doing it.

[indyfrisco]

In every salaried position I’ve had (and I’ve had several), I never had trouble taking off time as needed, because the understanding was that when necessary I’d be there. Regardless of how many hours I had already worked that week. That’s what a salaried position is all about.

^^^This.
For example, this morning I had to go to court to fight a ticket (which I won.) I rolled in to the office about 3.5 hours later than I normally do.
I don't plan on staying later than usual tonight, working any more than I normally do on a weekend, or taking time off to account for me not being here. Same thing when I have a dentist/MD appt, have to pick up my kid at daycare, or whatever. You know why... because over the course of the year I'll still average 45-50 hours/week of work and kick fucking ass while doing it.

^^^This

[smackaholic]

T1b challenge- associate each juror with their T1b counterpart

Juror #10- Ed Begley/Mvscal

3rd from right in back, kcscott scoping fellow jurors.

[BSmack]

In every salaried position I’ve had (and I’ve had several), I never had trouble taking off time as needed, because the understanding was that when necessary I’d be there. Regardless of how many hours I had already worked that week. That’s what a salaried position is all about.

And every OTHER salaried position I ever had also worked like that. This place was a little different than your average office environment. It was a sole proprietorship run by a guy who wallpapered his office with OSHA violations. My job was to keep an eye on the minimum wage FOB Vietnamese metal sorters and the drug addled middle aged son of a business partner of the owner who was their crew leader.

[mvscal]

And if you throw your summons in the trash around here, you will get a visit from the Sheriff.

No, you won't.

[smackaholic]

And if you throw your summons in the trash around here, you will get a visit from the Sheriff.

No, you won't.

what do you base this on, mvs?

do you have experience with it in LA? i would guess that such matters are treated differently in different states/counties.

[mvscal]

Yeah, I suppose a Sherrif's deputy could show up at your house. Then again your house could get struck by an meteor incinerating your entire family. I'd be more concerned about the meteor.

[Goober McTuber]

Yeah, I suppose a Sherrif's deputy could show up at your house. Then again your house could get struck by an meteor incinerating your entire family. I'd be more concerned about the meteor.

According to Terral, it's not a meteor, not a comet. It's a brown dwarf star.

[BSmack]

Yeah, I suppose a Sherrif's deputy could show up at your house. Then again your house could get struck by an meteor incinerating your entire family. I'd be more concerned about the meteor.

According to Terral, it's not a meteor, not a comet. It's a brown dwarf star.

That's racist.

[smackaholic]

Yeah, I suppose a Sherrif's deputy could show up at your house. Then again your house could get struck by an meteor incinerating your entire family. I'd be more concerned about the meteor.

According to Terral, it's not a meteor, not a comet. It's a brown dwarf star.

That's racist.

is not. wetback midget star would be racist.

[Invictus]

You can defer, but the trick is to pick your date around Thanksgiving.

Uh, no. The "trick" is to throw your summons in the trash. They'll manage just fine without you.

My sentiments exactly.

I said elsewhere that anyone who is not savvy enough to dodge jury duty deserves to sit and listen and if it is a high profile case, go under media scrutiny after the verdict is handed down. Some asshat said that it is my civic duty to make myself available for jury duty. No, it isn't.

I've never had to serve on a jury. Never been summoned either. Life is good.

[War Wagon]

Never served or summoned either, thankfully, as I'm sure it'd be damned inconvenient. But I look at it as a duty in much the same way I look at voting as a priviledge. Perhaps someone who refuses to serve on a jury should abdicate their right to vote.

[mvscal]

Maybe they should abdicate their "priviledge" (sic) of paying taxes, too. It would make about as much sense.