Time for Another Stupid Weather Thread

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:23 pm

Derron wrote:mid Willamette ( will-lam-et) Valley

You mean it's not called the "Central Valley?"

Sin,
Just about every dipshit local newscaster

There were some places in the western Mid-Valley that had over 10" in 2 days, plus the snowmelt.

They're closing Clackamette Park (end of the Oregon Trail... where they built a McDonald's). I remember back in '96, dudes turned it into a crazy jet-ski obstacle course.

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:32 pm

Dinsdale wrote:
Derron wrote:mid Willamette ( will-lam-et) Valley
You mean it's not called the "Central Valley?"

Sin,
Just about every dipshit local newscaster

I had to throw that in so all the tards did not butcher it or get tongue tied or brain fried it by saying ( wil a met).

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:59 pm

I was referring to the Mid-Valley constantly being called the "Central Valley."

Then again, the whore on KOIN this morning dropped "we all remember the floods of '96"... she's a recent transplant (from Wisconsin, I believe... hotties probably feel like freaks in Wisconsin, so they need to move nearer to their own kind).

We'll see how Western Washington fares with all their snowmelt -- they're a day or two behind us.

So much for taking the driftboat down the Clack this week... might be a little high for good fishing, but we'd probably get some unique views of the bitchin houses on the lower river.

Since I'm in St Johns, maybe I'll go check out the Willamette later. Wonder if they've started moving the Toyotas out of Terminal 4 yet? They usually wait until right before the river comes up, then start calling every temp agency in town in a panic to find people to move cars. Those would be good temp jobs for the Occupiers -- oh, except they shut that terminal down a few weeks ago.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Fri Jan 20, 2012 7:08 pm

Dinsdale wrote: Willamette

How do you pronounce that again?

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Jan 20, 2012 7:10 pm

WILL-uh-met... for you, anyway. It's how we pick out the foreigners.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Jan 20, 2012 10:57 pm

What could be better than rampant flooding and the associated landslides?

Well, we could be living next to The Dunes during 100MPH winds (sup Q West Coast).

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Fri Jan 20, 2012 11:14 pm

Nice..have to love that "ocean" view.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Jan 20, 2012 11:39 pm

I've driven through Waldport and Yachats a couplefew times lately -- a tsunami horror story waiting to happen.

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 12:00 am

A little of yesterday's ice storm on my truck....

No power at work, and likely won't until Monday (have to show up tomorrow just in case it does come back). Plenty of spin outs and LOTS of broken tree branches everywhere.

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 12:26 am

Dinsdale wrote:I've driven through Waldport and Yachats a couplefew times lately -- a tsunami horror story waiting to happen.

That would also apply to the Salishan spit there south of Lincoln City...a tsunami would take out all those places in a millisecond. And that is some high priced real estate, don;t know why, but it is.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 1:20 am

Diego in Seattle wrote:A little of yesterday's ice storm on my truck....

No power at work, and likely won't until Monday (have to show up tomorrow just in case it does come back). Plenty of spin outs and LOTS of broken tree branches everywhere.

A little of Tuesday's ice on my car...

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 1:46 am

mikey, that's my rig, right down to the color, so I can help you with this, dude.

look right under the radio. there's a row of buttons with symbols on them. pretty much right in the middle, one of those buttons has wavy horizontal lines. push it. a yellow light will come on. don't worry about it, it'll go off all by itself after a while and the scary white stuff on the window will be gone.

always glad to help a lowcaller out.

Dr_Phibes · Post by **Dr_Phibes** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 3:25 am

Dinsdale wrote: the 45th parallel

Fascinating 45th parallel fact!

In 1816, the US military constructed 'Fort Blunder' on Lake Champlain to prevent a recurrance of the Battle of Plattsburgh. Upon a second land survey conducted during a visit by President Monroe in 1817, it was discovered that the fort was mistakenly built in Canada, not the US.
The Americanos grabbed their tools and fucked off and the locals dismantled the massive, 30 ft. stone walls and used the material to put new additions on their homes.

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 3:37 am

Derron wrote:
I had to throw that in so all the tards did not butcher it or get tongue tied or brain fried it by saying ( wil a met).

Well, the Trail DID begin here. Of course it's will-lam-et. How the hell else would anybody who is not a fucking frog pronounce it?

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 5:20 pm

smackaholic wrote:mikey, that's my rig, right down to the color, so I can help you with this, dude.

look right under the radio. there's a row of buttons with symbols on them. pretty much right in the middle, one of those buttons has wavy horizontal lines. push it. a yellow light will come on. don't worry about it, it'll go off all by itself after a while and the scary white stuff on the window will be gone.

always glad to help a lowcaller out.

Thanks smack. I was wondering what that thing was for.

Now I won't have to get my electric blanket wet anymore.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 7:08 pm

I know a certain Chowd who was pretty pissed that they had to move to Portland, where it rarely snows, to learn about covering your windshield with newspaper when parked.

Way easier to clear, and the wiper blades don't get shredded getting them loose from the ice.

And U&Lers know a thing or two about wiper blades (the thingies we replace in October).

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 8:52 pm

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 9:46 pm

Stupid coon. What do you expect in the frozen tundra of the 33rd parallel.

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sat Jan 21, 2012 10:39 pm

Dinsdale wrote:I know a certain Chowd who was pretty pissed that they had to move to Portland, where it rarely snows, to learn about covering your windshield with newspaper when parked.

Newspaper?! Who does that?! We use cardboard here. Bit more efficient. Then again, we have weather here.

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 12:41 am

Toddowen wrote:
Dinsdale wrote:What could be better than rampant flooding and the associated landslides?
Living next to mutha fuuggs that should've never been allowed off the cotton plantation.

At least weather damage can be fixed.

Pack the fuck up and move.

Dr_Phibes · Post by **Dr_Phibes** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 4:06 am

Truman wrote:
Dinsdale wrote:, to learn about covering your windshield with newspaper when parked.
Newspaper?! Who does that?! We use cardboard here. Bit more efficient.

There's a pivot at the base of the wiper, point it upward before a storm. I live in a depressing, frozen nightmare and I've never seen anyone cover their car with anything from a refuse bin. I didn't know it snowed in Soweto.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 5:19 am

Dr_Phibes wrote:There's a pivot at the base of the wiper, point it upward before a storm. I live in a depressing, frozen nightmare and I've never seen anyone cover their car with anything from a refuse bin. I didn't know it snowed in Soweto.

We do the same thing on the other side of Lake Ontario. I have NEVER seen someone put newspaper, cardboard, wrapping paper or any other such thing on their windshield. And in high winds, the really smart ones gauge where the prevailing wind will come from and attempt to put the windshield in such a way that the wind keeps the snow off the glass.

I have no idea what the KC and U&L crowd thinks they are accomplishing.

Dr_Phibes · Post by **Dr_Phibes** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 5:25 am

Yeah, I'm scratching my head over this one. Stay tuned, we'll learn all kinds of tricks for when we bring our horses to market and they throw a shoe.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Sun Jan 22, 2012 5:37 am

Dr_Phibes wrote:I live in a depressing, frozen nightmare and I've never seen anyone cover their car with anything from a refuse bin.

That's because we deal with this stuff on a regular basis. Those who don't, start preparing their MacGyver tactics days in advance. Combating a mundane nuisance such as frost on the windshield can come about in a variety of ways. The most popular method would be this sturdy structure called a "garage." The key is to park in it overnight. When you wake up, you can drive out of it ice-free. A more blue collar method would be a simple firm poke of the defroster button with the index finger followed by a sneak attack on the windshield with an ice scraper. Takes about the same amount of time as plastering your ride with yesterday's news, 'cept your elbow gets a little exercise and you don't have to look like a hobo decorating his home.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 5:21 pm

Truman wrote:Then again, we have weather here.

The newspaper thing comes from the skiing crowd, who hang out at the Mountain... where they've had over 8 feet of new (pow... gnar... that stuff) in the last week.

You were saying?

I live adjacent to the snowiest place on earth. So combine that with a collective intelligence that urges us to live down below it, rather than in the thick of it...

maybe you should learn, rather than try and teach or mock.

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 5:41 pm

Dr_Phibes wrote:
Truman wrote:
Dinsdale wrote:, to learn about covering your windshield with newspaper when parked.
Newspaper?! Who does that?! We use cardboard here. Bit more efficient.
There's a pivot at the base of the wiper, point it upward before a storm. I live in a depressing, frozen nightmare and I've never seen anyone cover their car with anything from a refuse bin. I didn't know it snowed in Soweto.

Thought you Red Horde-types detached your blades when you parked to prevent your fellow kameraden from stealing them.

Yes, Phibes, I’m fully aware of my vehicle’s wiper hinges, and make use of them when heavy snow is forecast.

Ice, however, is a whole ‘nother country. I have better things to do than to spend half-an-hour standing in freezing sleet chiseling my windshield out from under an ice sheet. The commute home is bad enough…

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 5:48 pm

Dinsdale wrote:The newspaper thing comes from the skiing crowd, who hang out at the Mountain... where they've had over 8 feet of new (pow... gnar... that stuff) in the last week.

You were saying?

I live adjacent to the snowiest place on earth. So combine that with a collective intelligence that urges us to live down below it, rather than in the thick of it...

maybe you should learn, rather than try and teach or mock.

Dinsdale wrote:I know a certain Chowd who was pretty pissed that they had to move to Portland, where it rarely snows, to learn about covering your windshield with newspaper when parked.

I wasn't aware you regarded the use of cardboard as a teachable moment.

As for mockery, we just as well shut this place down. Don't be so thin-skinned, Dins...

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:11 pm

Truman wrote:Ice, however, is a whole ‘nother country. I have better things to do than to spend half-an-hour standing in freezing sleet chiseling my windshield out from under an ice sheet. The commute home is bad enough…

Have you no defroster?

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:18 pm

Yes, B. Why do you ask?

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:23 pm

Truman wrote:Yes, B. Why do you ask?

Just because you don't seem to understand how to use the defroster in concert with a simple ice scraper to remove ice. All but the thickest ice can be removed in under 5 minutes this way.

Dr_Phibes · Post by **Dr_Phibes** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:29 pm

The paper or cardboard would get wet and bond to the glass, then you've got a giant, half frozen, soggy mess on your hands when you clean it :? This is just crazy talk.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:38 pm

Truman wrote:
Dinsdale wrote:I know a certain Chowd who was pretty pissed that they had to move to Portland, where it rarely snows, to learn about covering your windshield with newspaper when parked.

Speaks to common sense, eh?

If I want to see that dreadful shit known as "snow," I can drive for an hour (or less), where the current conditions tell me there's 92" on the ground, and they're expecting another 14" before the day is over.

Have fun digging your truck out after a hard day's skiing. Or, just cover the glass with paper.

But only a fucking retard would live where it's expected to fall on the place where they live. Life's too short to spend it on that bullshit.

Phibber -- if it's well-below freezing, paper/cardboard sticking to the glass isn't an issue. Closer to freezing, a very short blast with the defroster and the whole shooting match is done.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:43 pm

BSmack wrote:
Truman wrote:Yes, B. Why do you ask?
Just because you don't seem to understand how to use the defroster in concert with a simple ice scraper to remove ice. All but the thickest ice can be removed in under 5 minutes this way.

Another method I'll share from my winter weather bag-o-tricks would getting up, say, 10 minutes earlier than you normally would and starting your car with the defroster running. That way by the time you get out there the ice is all loose and melty and scraping it is all but a breeze. Even better if you have a remote starter. I know, I know...crazy shit.

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:44 pm

BSmack wrote:
Truman wrote:Yes, B. Why do you ask?
Just because you don't seem to understand how to use the defroster in concert with a simple ice scraper to remove ice. All but the thickest ice can be removed in under 5 minutes this way.

You DO recall the wide expanse of glass that sealed the inside of your truck cab from the elements, correct, B? You also recall the efficiency and excellence of your trucks's defroster as it operated of a frozen morning, as well as the convenience of standing on the vehicle's tires to scrape every sketch of ice from the windshield so as to not have your field of vision impaired, right?

I could've given a rat's ass what that box truck looked like with card board on it when I parked it at night. All I know is I didn't have to spend half-an-hour digging it out the next morning before hitting the road.

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:51 pm

Dr_Phibes wrote:The paper or cardboard would get wet and bond to the glass, then you've got a giant, half frozen, soggy mess on your hands when you clean it :? This is just crazy talk.

Nyet, Komrade Doktor. What Dins said. You don't put cardboard - or newspaper - on a wet surface. And it peels away from the glass easily on a sub-zero morning or an ice-blasted evening when you're ready to motor.

Dr_Phibes · Post by **Dr_Phibes** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 7:01 pm

You don't put cardboard - or newspaper - on a wet surface

Bloody hell! That's what happens when ice is involved, a liquid transforms into a solid, it's inevitable that whatever pulp product you use.. it's going to get wet then freeze.

I'm all for new innovative ways of getting going in the morning, standing around like a twat in the cold is shit, but this makes no sense.

If it's ski-hill, 'Cliffhanger' snow like Dins says, just use your snow brush.

If it's icy, Great Lakes garbage, you're scraping and there's no way around it.

Truman · Post by **Truman** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 7:38 pm

http://voices.yahoo.com/tips-keep-snow- ... tml?cat=27

Still can't believe you've never heard of this, Phibes...

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 8:31 pm

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:
BSmack wrote:
Truman wrote:Yes, B. Why do you ask?
Just because you don't seem to understand how to use the defroster in concert with a simple ice scraper to remove ice. All but the thickest ice can be removed in under 5 minutes this way.
Another method I'll share from my winter weather bag-o-tricks would getting up, say, 10 minutes earlier than you normally would and starting your car with the defroster running. That way by the time you get out there the ice is all loose and melty and scraping it is all but a breeze. Even better if you have a remote starter. I know, I know...crazy shit.

Better have a remote starter because around here, tweakers cruise the neighborhoods looking for cars , unlocked, running to warm up and steal them the fuck right out of the driveway. Not a problem in my rural area however..car theft will be met with gunfire.

They do have these things called engine heaters that you can plug in your sled with...a must if you have diesels and handy for gas engines...hit the starter and the defrost starts blowing hot air right away..when I was a volunteer firefighter I plugged in my gas pickup and had a old blanket across the windshield..get a call, pull the plug, yank the blanket off and hit the key, drop it into drive and off I went. Did that about 1500 times or so over the years.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Sun Jan 22, 2012 9:11 pm

Derron wrote:Better have a remote starter because around here, tweakers cruise the neighborhoods looking for cars , unlocked, running to warm up and steal them the fuck right out of the driveway. Not a problem in my rural area however..car theft will be met with gunfire.

I suppose if I lived in some white trash infested shithole that would indeed be a concern. Nah, it's just cold.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Sun Jan 22, 2012 9:38 pm

Truman wrote: standing on the vehicle's tires to scrape every sketch of ice from the windshield so as to not have your field of vision impaired, right?

Standing on the tires? What the fuck? Are you TVO?

I drive a Chevy Blazer and a slightly extended brush/scraper unit is more then enough to reach any and all areas of the windshield. Then again, I can understand that if it snows in Lilliput, you might want to take the bucket truck out and mount some covering on the windows. Suit yourself.