There's drunk, then there's super drunk

[Goober McTuber]

Kid's from Canada. Go figure.

GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. -- A Detroit Red Wings prospect faces charges under Michigan's tough "super drunk" designation following a traffic stop during which police discovered him clad in a Teletubby costume.

According to a Grand Rapids police report obtained by MLive.com, Riley Sheahan twice registered a blood alcohol level of .30 percent when tested in jail after his arrest on Oct. 29.

Police say the 20-year-old Grand Rapids Griffins center from St. Catharines, Ontario, was wearing the costume of a purple Teletubby known as Tinky Winky during the stop.

The "super drunk" charge carries a penalty of 180 days in jail and possible deportation. Sheahan also faces a charge of providing false information, as he was carrying the driver's license of fellow Wings prospect Brendan Smith when he was arrested.

According to the police report, Sheahan told police he was using Smith's license so he could get into bars. Smith, 23, was the Red Wings' first-round pick in 2007.

The police report didn't say how Sheahan got possession of Smith's identification.

Sheahan also was arrested on alcohol-related charges in 2010 (public intoxication, consumption by a minor) when he was a freshman at Notre Dame.

Wings assistant general manager Jim Nill says Sheahan is "getting help right now and will continue to get help."

Sheahan's next court hearing is scheduled for Dec. 13.

[Sirfindafold]

[Goober McTuber]

Nice red X, Corky. One of your better efforts.

[Goober McTuber]

[Mace]

Rack Roach! That would make a great ornament on the T1B Christmas tree.

[Jay in Phoenix]

"That's outrageous! A little booze in the bloodstream is absolutly no problem, especially when driving!"

DRUNKEN WONDERLAND

Moving Sale, are you listening
on the curb, blood is glistening
a horrific sight
he's happy tonight
a drunk ran over a pedestrian!

His defense, will be absurd
tiny suit looks like a small turd
he'll prattle along
this thing is so wrong
defending drunken fucks in legal land

He'll tell the defendant he can go free
and pretend that he is safe and sound
he'll say, "were you plastered?"
dwarf attorney
and you can drive while drunk when you're in town!"

Later on he'll conspire
with his lies, so inspired
shit faced, unafraid
this false serenade
a drunk scum bag killed a pedestrian

In the courtroom he can build a defense
stinks like hell but serves this legal clown
he'll have lots of fun with mr. drunkman
until the other lawyer knocks him down!

When it fails, ain't it thrillin'
goes to jail, does this villain
the midget's dismayed
his plans went astray
getting' bung-holed by a dead pedestrian!
getting' bung-holed by a dead pedestrian!

[Mace]

Rack Jay once again! Laughing at TVO's stupidity will always be funny.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

Nice job, Jay.

[mvscal]

Super Drunk? Was anyone else expecting AP in granny panties and a cape?

[Mace]

Super Drunk? Was anyone else expecting AP in granny panties and a cape?

Well, I was certainly expecting someone to reference AP in this thread. Thanks.

[Left Seater]

Seems way early for the rookie party, but then maybe Grand Rapids does things differently from the rest of the league.

Shame on the veterans on that team for even letting that kid anywhere near his car. Our players take a party bus and the players cars are all locked inside the arena parking lot and unavailable to them until 10:00am the next morning if the party goes down in Houston.

[Felix]

roach and jay get a big



verrruh nice

[Screw_Michigan]

Seems way early for the rookie party, but then maybe Grand Rapids does things differently from the rest of the league.

Rack AHL smack!

[War Wagon]

a BAC of .30 is not far from being clinically dead and embalmed. surprising this guy could even walk, much less find his car keys.

[The Seer]

....lightweights....

The cause of death was determined to be acute ethanolism (alcohol poisoning), and Davidson County Medical Examiner Charles Harlan stated that his blood alcohol level was .477 (the equivalent of 20 1-ounce shots of 100-proof whiskey[10] and almost five times over the then Tennessee level of 0.1 legal intoxication limit, and nearly six times over the current .08 legal limit to drive). Keith Whitley was 34 years old.

[Mace]

Or to this pussy......



Rack Whitley for landing Lorrie Morgan.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Super Drunk? Was anyone else expecting AP in granny panties and a cape?

"Oh, this is terrible! We only have an hour left to return this keg and it's still half full! What are we going to do?"

"If only Super Drunk was here. He'd save us!"

"Look! In the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! It's...Super Drunk!"



.
.
.
.
.
.


"Yay, Super Drunk! You're our hero!"

[Ken]

Excellent...
Rack the hell out of Mgo

[Shoalzie]

Hockey players love their booze...and it had to be a jackass that is actually expected to be a key part of the Wings in the future. The Wings already had a former draft pick fry himself on a hiking trip in Europe...now this dummy is on his way to going 'Steve Chiasson'. Maybe they should trade him to the Kings...the Flyers got rid of their party boys and both of them ended up in LA and snagged a cup their trouble. Me thinks this dude is going to be serinaded with chants of 'Tinky Winky' in the future.

[Shoalzie]

Shame on the veterans on that team for even letting that kid anywhere near his car.

You cover the league...there aren't a lot of older players in the A with a lot of NHL credibility. If you're in your 30s and still in hockey AAA, it's time to change careers or go play in Europe. Most of the Griffs are guys on their ELC...not like there are any vets from the Wings playing with them right now during the lockout...those guys are either in the negotiations or they've flown the coop and are playing in Europe to earn some scratch until the new CBA is signed.

[Left Seater]

Actually there are vets on that Grand Rapids team. Brennan Evans, Nathan Paetsch, Jeff Hogan and Triston Grant. Those 4 have combined for over 1750 AHL games and two have more than 100 NHL games.

Granted none are really prospects at this point but they can still earn a good living on an AHL deal or an NHL two way.

Every AHL team has a few of these "vets" that make up the leadership of the team to guide the prospects along. It is these four guys that let the tele-tubby down.

[Shoalzie]

Do young guys on those teams look up to career AHLers the same way a young player on the big club would look up to an established star player? For a guy like Sheahan, he's got an NHL future...played a couple games at the end of last year when he signed his ELC after leaving Notre Dame. I don't honestly follow the AHL beyond watching out for the hot prospects. The NHL washouts or career minor leaguers are "just a guys".

[Left Seater]

For the most part yes, they do look up to these career AHL players. Take a hockeydb look at a guy like Jon DiSalvatore. That guy commands the attention and respect of the young hotshot prospects. He himself isn't going to play in the show, but he will teach the young guys what it is to be a good pro and a good person.

On top of that he makes 6 figures a year playing a game.

[Dinsdale]

a BAC of .30 is not far from being clinically dead and embalmed. surprising this guy could even walk, much less find his car keys.

http://beaverton.katu.com/news/news/500 ... had-bac-50

[Diego in Seattle]

a BAC of .30 is not far from being clinically dead and embalmed. surprising this guy could even walk, much less find his car keys.

http://beaverton.katu.com/news/news/500 ... had-bac-50

[BSmack]

This...



and this...







Even if the rest of this thread turns into a TVO scroll wheel fest, this is already enough to archive it. Beautiful work guys.

[Screw_Michigan]

Is that TenTallBen on the left there?