Do you have a motto?

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 2:04 pm

You know, something you guide your life and decisions by?

Or some brainiac quote you throw at a half-drunk relative over Thanksgiving turkey -- when he starts prying into your personal affairs too much.

Live free or die.

Get busy living or get busy dying.

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery.

Work to become, not to acquire.

Eat, drink and remarry.

John Wooden had some interesting ones...

If you're not making mistakes, you're not doing anything.

Discipline yourself and others won't need to.

If I am through learning, I am through.

mvscal · Post by **mvscal** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 2:17 pm

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 2:24 pm

Go fuck yourself.

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 3:46 pm

That's cool. She can just get on your health insurance.

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 4:22 pm

It's easier to apologize than to ask permission.

Illegitimi non carborundum

IKYABWAI

Jacque Custodian · Post by **Jacque Custodian** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 4:57 pm

I jizz mop, therefore I am.

sig

Screwy

Oui?

Moving Sale · Post by **Moving Sale** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 5:23 pm

mvscal wrote:

I knew Clarence Mitchell.
Clarence Mitchell was a friend of my uncle.
You're no Clarence Mitchell.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Thu Sep 25, 2014 5:31 pm

Take it to the bumper sticker thread.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 5:39 pm

mvscal wrote:[img]http://www.family-crests.com/productimages/clans/mitchell-clan-crest.jpg[/img]

An odd motto for an avowed atheist.

trev · Post by **trev** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 5:53 pm

Less is More

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 6:11 pm

Give a man a fire, you warm him for a day. Set a man on fire, he stays warm for a lifetime.

If you’re wondering what to give the man who has everything, you might want to start with penicillin.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 6:53 pm

There's nothing more useless than altitude above you, runway behind you, or fuel left behind.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Thu Sep 25, 2014 7:07 pm

Goober McTuber wrote:Give a man a fire, you warm him for a day. Set a man on fire, he stays warm for a lifetime.

If you’re wondering what to give the man who has everything, you might want to start with penicillin.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

Got anything from the "funny" pile?

mvscal · Post by **mvscal** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 7:58 pm

Ooo snap.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 8:21 pm

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:
Goober McTuber wrote:Give a man a fire, you warm him for a day. Set a man on fire, he stays warm for a lifetime.

If you’re wondering what to give the man who has everything, you might want to start with penicillin.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

Got anything from the "funny" pile?

The only good Canadian is a dead Canadian.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Thu Sep 25, 2014 8:50 pm

Did you take a "vow of unfunniness"?

This is just...terrible.

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 9:36 pm

Chance favors the prepared mind.
-L. Pasteur

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 9:43 pm

When all else fails, take it up the ass.

Sincerely,

Mvscunt

Sirfindafold · Post by **Sirfindafold** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 10:14 pm

Beauty is a light switch away.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 11:09 pm

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:Did you take a "vow of unfunniness"?

This is just...terrible.

That wasn't actually from the "funny" pile. That was from the "Captain Obvious" folder.

Bucmonkey · Post by **Bucmonkey** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 11:23 pm

"People suck"

Roger_the_Shrubber · Post by **Roger_the_Shrubber** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 11:44 pm

To err is human, to moo, bovine. - A cow, Iowa

To be is to do - Socrates
To do is to be - Plato
Do Be Do Be Do - Sinatra

R-Jack · Post by **R-Jack** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 11:46 pm

Roger_the_Shrubber wrote: Autobots.......roll out!

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 12:25 am

res ipsa loquitur

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:30 am

R-Jack wrote:
Roger_the_Shrubber wrote: Autobots.......roll out!

^^^^^^^^^

winner

mamamustanger · Post by **mamamustanger** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:36 pm

Smackie Chan wrote:It's easier to apologize than to ask permission.

Illegitimi non carborundum

IKYABWAI

I think it goes....it's easier to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission.

If I am am wrong permit me to apologize.

Love ya!

mamamustanger · Post by **mamamustanger** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:42 pm

Those who fart in church, must sit in their own pew!

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:45 pm

"That's why we can't have nice things."

I say them daily to the family.

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:47 pm

Smackie wrote:It's easier to apologize than to ask permission.

mama wrote:I think it goes....it's easier to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission.

Smackie got right to the point -- but yeah, he took a little shortcut.

If you take shortcuts, you get cut short.

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 2:55 pm

Hey Shrubber my friend--- I always thought "to do it to be" was Sartre. We need a clarification.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Fri Sep 26, 2014 3:02 pm

Wolfman wrote:Hey Shrubber my friend--- I always thought "to do it to be" was Sartre. We need a clarification.

Why are you even engaging this idiot? Is it because you're looking to score pain meds?

I can help you out, bro. Doctor Shlomart's Organic "Green" Salve...

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 3:42 pm

mamamustanger wrote:
Smackie Chan wrote:It's easier to apologize than to ask permission.
I think it goes....it's easier to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission.

I stand by my wording since I don't find it easy to beg for anything. Saying "I'm sorry" is a snap.

If I am am wrong permit me to apologize.

No dice. I demand that you get on your knees and beg forgiveness. Although the last part is negotiable.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Fri Sep 26, 2014 4:35 pm

Fuck off. I've got work to do.

mvscal · Post by **mvscal** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 4:36 pm

"Can a borrow a couple quarters for the wash machine?"

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 4:43 pm

That's not helping them, that's hurting them.

Yea, I know that's from some clueless Rome caller. But it got played on a show while my wife and I were driving to Vermont. So she heard it. So now we both use it in conversation, albeit infrequently.

trev · Post by **trev** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 4:49 pm

Why ya gotta be so rude? Don't ya know I'm human too?

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 4:59 pm

Who the Hell is Mikey?

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 5:26 pm

trev wrote:Why ya gotta be so rude? Don't ya know I'm human too?

Great, now that song is going to be stuck in my head all damn day again. Between that and the Mod damn Frozen soundtrack I want to jump from a tall building.

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 5:26 pm

Fuck you you fucking fuck.

mamamustanger · Post by **mamamustanger** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 5:33 pm

Smackie Chan wrote:
mamamustanger wrote:
Smackie Chan wrote:It's easier to apologize than to ask permission.
I think it goes....it's easier to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission.
I stand by my wording since I don't find it easy to beg for anything. Saying "I'm sorry" is a snap.

If I am am wrong permit me to apologize.
No dice. I demand that you get on your knees and beg forgiveness. Although the last part is negotiable.

If I am on my knees I can guarantee you that it won't be to beg for forgiveness, if you know what I mean