ML@Coyote and the Three 'Tards

[Jay in Phoenix]

Once upon a time there was a forest and in the middle of that forest was a post board and on the board lived three ‘tards, an old-man ‘tard, a midget ‘tard and a chiming ‘tard.

One morning Old-man ‘tard made up a lie about a flat Earth and served it up in three posts but they were too stupid to believe, so the three ‘tards went out for a walk before they were mocked. While they were away a Coyote came past the board, his fur was brown and matted and his name was ML.

He was hungry for entertainment and when he saw the posts he thought, “That seems odd.” He looked through the window and saw the scripts for the posts on a table. “Perhaps I can reply to poor fool,” he thought. And so, he clicked on the link and sneaked in. “Hello,” he called, “Anyone here?” But there was no one there, as it was a lonely board. He read the first post on the one board, “Mmm, too silly.” Next, he tried the second most post, the shortest. “Mmm, too stupid.” And then he read the third post, the gayest, and it was even dumber than the rest!

“Now I feel rather thirsty,” he thought. There were three glasses on a table by the board. They contained water. He didn’t like water, but he was very thirsty. First, he tried the old man’s glass, but the water was too hard. Next, he tried the midget’s glass, but it was too soft. Finally, he tried the glass with the chimes, but it was too filthy and stained with bum feces. “Oh gross,” he thought. “Must be made in San Francisco.” He paused and looked around, feeling a little tired. “Perhaps I should lie down and try to read a different post.”

He went into the boards next forum. First, he tried another of the old mans posts, but the topic of the post was the firmament and it really seemed derivative and mythical. “Man, this Old Pops guy is really a loon.” He mused. Then he tried the midgets post but the font was too small and it seemed much too angry. Finally he tried the chimers post. It was about UCLA and Golden State and all things San Francisco. It contained stock photos and was clearly full of lies and false bravado. “Pathetic.” The Coyote mused. “Chiming and lying has made this one crazy.”

So, feeling fatigued, he lay down and fell asleep. Soon after this the three ‘tards returned. Old man ‘tard looked down on his post. “Someone's been reading my thread,” he growled. Midget ‘tard looked up, way up on his post, as it was on the table and too high to reach. “And someone's been reading my thread too,” he whined. And then chiming ‘tard chimed, “And someone's been reading my thread and it’s all ridiculed!” Old man ‘tard turned to his glass. “Someone's been drinking from my glass,” he growled ever louder. “And someone's drinking from mine too,” griped midget ‘tard. “And someone's shattered my chimes…glass!” Chiming ‘tard sobbed, tears staining his ren-faire garb.

They went into the Cul de Smack, looking for the intruder. Old ‘tard noticed that his bed was all rumpled and crumpled. “Someone's been sleeping in my bed,” he roared. Midget ‘tard noticed the same. “And someone's been sleeping in my bed too,” he said. “And look, the head board and foot boards are broken, he must’ve been a giant!!!” Then chiming tard gave a loud cry. “There's someone in my bed sleeping right now!” ML opened his eyes and laughed uncontrollably at the sight of the three angry ‘tards. He jumped out of bed then jumped out of the window and laughed all the way home. ML decided to take and long, long break and leave the post board behind as he sought his green, grassy havens in South Carolina. The three ‘tards stood around looking stupid, caught in a circle jerk of their own making.

“We don’t get no respect.” They cried, wondering why.

The End

[Screw_Michigan]

[Jay in Phoenix]

So, you liked the story that much Screwy?


You're welcome.

[Softball Bat]

flat Earth
the firmament

Flat earth is allegedly like the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus.
Yet we have 'tards so dishevelled by the topic that they devote dozens of pages on a message board toward the end of debunking it.

... multiple times.

lol

Not many things will ever be funnier than that.

Well, except for what we now see here from Jayne.


Jayne, so unglued by the topic, poptart's skill, the assault on Buzz and other frauds (hit too close to home, Jayne declared), and the unassailable truth of the topic, took unspeakable actions, and then went ---> *ghost* <--- from the board.

Took his toys and went home.

hahahahaaa!


Now he returns, seeks approval from the board, and and posts the above abortion of a story.
It is D+ at best.






Go away again, Jayne.

It suits you best.

[Jay in Phoenix]

Quite a little meltdown there SoftTart. You take a little ribbing waaaaay too seriously.

Of course, as you are a certified lunatic, that's to be expected.

However, to your point, you have never...ever once shown any evidence, visual or written of a non-globe shaped Earth or a Firmament above it.

Not one single photo.

Yet you expect the same of anyone else who calls you out on your delusions.

I seek no approval from anyone for anything. I left this place because it had become tedious. It still is.

Taking a breather was refreshing.

You should try it. For everyone's sake.

Have a nice day you senile simpleton.

[Left Seater]

However, to your point, you have never...ever once shown any evidence, visual or written of a non-globe shaped Earth or a Firmament above it.

Wait he posted an equation for an ellipse and claimed it proved the earth wasn’t a sphere. So yeah he is totally winning.

[Jay in Phoenix]

Damn, I missed that one. Well with proof like that...













...yeah, he's still a dumb ass.

[Mikey]

So, the Brothers Palaverous both show up within about a day of each other.

Ponderous.

Was this a planned conjunction, or just a chance passing of two lexical Syracusia in the night?

[Jay in Phoenix]

Hello Mikey, nice to see you too.

You seem bitter. What gives?

Besides your hair and waist lines.

[Mikey]

Not bitter. Just making an observation.

After all, a board needs its...err... praters.

Are you insulted by my characterization?

[Jay in Phoenix]

Insulted? No my good sir, not at all.

To paraphrase a couple of old sayings. Those who can, write. Those who can't, critique.

Or something like that. I noticed you're still viewing the world this way...



Not a pretty view. :grin:

[Mikey]

So, who's the bitter one now?

Do you have a problem with politics, or just with those who you think don't agree with you?

[Softball Bat]

However, to your point, you have never...ever once shown any evidence, visual or written of a non-globe shaped Earth or a Firmament above it.

Wait he posted an equation for an ellipse and claimed it proved the earth wasn’t a sphere. So yeah he is totally winning.

ummm...




#liars

[Jay in Phoenix]

So, who's the bitter one now?

Do you have a problem with politics, or just with those who you think don't agree with you?

Bitter?

Good God Mikey, it's called a joke. The clue was the smiley.

You're so red assed about politics these days. Man, lighten up a little bit.

I could give a rats ass about politics, at least as you view them. Blow up the two party system and be done with it.

Go take a chill pill tubby.

[Mikey]

OK, fair enough.

That being said, go fuck yourself.
:grin:

[Jay in Phoenix]

Now that's what I'm talking about!!!