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Mr T
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Post by Mr T »

Van wrote:
(We were debating which was bigger, in the absolute, not just on average. We were doing the Animal Fights Challenge, where we pitted rhinos against hippos and bears against tigers and lemurs against furry marmosets and such. The consensus among all the various "expert" sites we found seemed to be that polar bears were considered slightly larger than Kodiaks on average and also at the extreme, but that it was so close as to be difficult to pin down with any degree of certainty...)
:?:

:puzzled:
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socal
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Post by socal »

BWAAAAAAAHAHA!!!

Between the various wiggers ('sup R-Jack), phone skanks, and asshats that wander into your shop, don't tell me that you and RC Texan don't have ample opportunity to invite said "customers" and or co-workers into the manager's office for some "service" or horizontal morale boosting.

:lol:
Van wrote:Kumbaya, asshats.
R-Jack wrote:
Atomic Punk wrote:So why did you post it?
Yes, that just happened.
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Van
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Post by Van »

Dude, if you ever saw our motley assortment of wiggers and phone skanks you'd be glad you're taking home Biff The 8th Grader rather than LaQuadrapop, Fat Skank Baby Mama Credit Criminal...
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Post by PSUFAN »

Bless you guys. I'm laughing a good bit...
King Crimson wrote:anytime you have a smoke tunnel and it's not Judas Priest in the mid 80's....watch out.
mvscal wrote:France totally kicks ass.
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socal
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Post by socal »

Van: 12:30 is lunch. Mike Rozier, Nebraska.

ST: What do you want? Greg Pruit, that bitch from OU.

Van: Wednesday is fish sticks. Green lime jello for dessert. Napolean McCallum, Naval Acadamy.

ST: You want another apple juice? Err...fuck!

Van: No, orange soda. I'M KING OF THE 30'S!!! Uh oh, it's 12:31.
Van wrote:Kumbaya, asshats.
R-Jack wrote:
Atomic Punk wrote:So why did you post it?
Yes, that just happened.
MgoBlue-LightSpecial
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

Van, you're gonna have to get past the Flaming Lips thing one of these days. They're your only reference tool, as it pertains to saying anything remotely negative towards me. The FL, as much as I enjoy a couple of their albums, are one of a guzillion bands I'm into. Suffice it to say, years and years later, while you've still got Steve Vai, Eric Johnson, Al Di Meola, Stevie Ray, and other pretentious guitar wankers on constant rotation, I've ran the gammit from A - Z on recent music over the past few months.

But hey, if you're all about guys with greasy, slicked back hair, unbuttoned shiny shirts, and the spotlight fixated on em as they shoot their wads all over their strings, have at it. I prefer the hetero stuff.
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Van
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Post by Van »

Hardly.

First off, your Flaming Lips thing is just the tip of the iceberg where you and Alternative MetroSexual Trying Too Hard Chic is concerned.

Your fear of motorcycling is just too perfect.

Btw, the day SRV and "pretentious" ever come together in any sentence authored by anybody but you will be the first. With as little knowledge as you routinely display about so many artists you routinely disparage I'm going to have to assume that you're simply pulling cliches out 'yer bung...

Be that as it may, hey, I enjoy your posts and I respect you too much to care about any of the negativity. Same with Dins. You two can pull the dork card till Kirstie Alley looks like Emo Phillips and I'll still never give a shit. I know better, you know better and it's all just harmless bullshit anyway...
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Post by Harvdog »

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:Van, you're gonna have to get past the Flaming Lips thing one of these days. They're your only reference tool, as it pertains to saying anything remotely negative towards me. The FL, as much as I enjoy a couple of their albums, are one of a guzillion bands I'm into. Suffice it to say, years and years later, while you've still got Steve Vai, Eric Johnson, Al Di Meola, Stevie Ray, and other pretentious guitar wankers on constant rotation, I've ran the gammit from A - Z on recent music over the past few months.

But hey, if you're all about guys with greasy, slicked back hair, unbuttoned shiny shirts, and the spotlight fixated on em as they shoot their wads all over their strings, have at it. I prefer the hetero stuff.
Ever hear of Ron White? He got thrown out of a bar for wearing a hat. He was told that the hat was how they could tell if people were gay or not. He responded by saying the only way we can tell if people are gay in Texas is if they have a hair cut like yours. Edit: If they listen to the Flaming Lips.

Eric Johnson, Steve Vai, Al Di Meola and SRV are some of the greatest guitar players to ever grace this earth. If you think the FL are great musicians then you probably think the Area 51 actually exists with spacemen and shit. SRV was a genius and if you don't get it that is cool. But to call him pretentious is the biggest stretch I have ever heard.

Van, please tell me you guys don't show the "goat". :wink:
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

Harv,

You're forming arguments against things I haven't even said. What's up with that?

Look, I'm not going to turn this into another drawn out wheel-scroller of a debate on music. Lord knows Van and I have gone through that too many times at various boards, and the sacred CF board is the last place that needs to be cluttered up with that crap. That's a debate that will never go anywhere, as we're both far too deeply rooted in our own musical interests/genres. This discussion was about Van's ultra dorkiness - which I assure you has little to do with his musical tastes anyway, because the label is, as Dins eluded to, attributed to the way he carries himself on these forums. Solid poster, sure. Gigantic dork? You betcha.

And by the way, I never disrespected those guys as musicians. To do so would be ignorant at best. I just don't care to listen to their music. Technical wanking alone does nothing for me...sans a few prog rock bands that I still enjoy.
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Post by indyfrisco »

Dude is pathetic.

Looks like he was jealous of all the double dong dildo smack run at Crown and decided to put his hat int he ring.

Typical taco tech... :roll:
Goober McTuber wrote:One last post...
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Van
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Post by Van »

Mgo, the only thing I jumped on there was your labeling of SRV as "pretentious"...

That was just ridiculous. 180 degrees wrong.

As for Dins' "dork" thing which you're now trying to gravy train, how does one "carry themselves on these forums" like a dork?

I don't do anything much differently than either you or Dins. 'Bout the only difference is unlike Dins you and I don't constantly brag about how everything we do/eat/drink/invent/experience is the best and everything everyone else does/eats/drinks/invents/experiences is stupid and beneath contempt.

Also, yeah, I don't smoke, drink or do drugs and I can't stand the entire Harley-Davidson culture...and I'm not uncomfortable talking about these things. I don't hide behind some internet warrior facade. Neither do you, really.

Bottom line, those differences make Dins a bit of a sheep and often times a downright idiot, actually. They don't make other people who differ from him uncool. Fact is, Mgo, you and I are very similar posters. Always have been. Your posting style, if that's what we can call it, is a helluva lot closer to mine than to Dins'...
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Post by Dinsdale »

Van wrote:I don't smoke, drink or do drugs and I can't stand the entire Harley-Davidson culture...and I'm not uncomfortable talking about these things.
Light coming on yet, Dork?

"I've never drank, smoked, or done drugs, and I don't understand the Harley mystique, but I still feel I'm the ultimate authority on these subjects, and I'll even take a condescending tone on subjects I admittedly know nothing about."

Starting to understand, stick-in-the-mud?

Yeah, everybody loves the indignant teetotaler at a party...

Fact is, Mgo, you and I are very similar posters.

OH BURN!


You just got runned, MGO.
I got 99 problems but the 'vid ain't one
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Van
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Post by Van »

Dinsdale wrote:
Van wrote:I don't smoke, drink or do drugs and I can't stand the entire Harley-Davidson culture...and I'm not uncomfortable talking about these things.
Light coming on yet, Dork?

"I've never drank, smoked, or done drugs, and I don't understand the Harley mystique, but I still feel I'm the ultimate authority on these subjects, and I'll even take a condescending tone on subjects I admittedly know nothing about."
I know plenty about those things, Dins, which is precisely why I reject them and lemmings like you who mindlessly fall in line with them.

Image over substance, uber alles...

Lame.
Starting to understand, stick-in-the-mud?
Yes, I am. For a forty something dude you still have comical insecurity issues.
Yeah, everybody loves the indignant teetotaler at a party...
The teetotaler doesn't give a shit what other people think. His choice is his own and it's above reproach. So's his liver.
Fact is, Mgo, you and I are very similar posters.

OH BURN!


You just got runned, MGO.
Nah. We've both been around forever and we're very similar. We both tend to attract the same type of praise from the same types of people. I'm just more of a lightning rod for smack than he is because he plays his "real life" cards closer to the vest than I do.

He's certainly nothing like you, Dins. You're more akin to an intelligent/funny/creative Zyclone...but make no mistake, it's still Zyclone. Same constant bragging about the food, drink, locale, fighting, chicks pulling and elbow rubbing with celebs. You two have become one shared archetpe, a joke, a catchprase.

Refer to Fester's perfect Dins parody post for thorough edification.
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

Van wrote:Mgo, the only thing I jumped on there was your labeling of SRV as "pretentious"...

That was just ridiculous. 180 degrees wrong.
What's ridiculous is this belief that you can invalidate what is entirely an opinion. If you disagree, fine, but there's no way an opinionated description can be "180 degres wrong." Not even possible. You have no pool of "evidence" to draw from in order to prove me wrong. This is entirely based on personal perception.
As for Dins' "dork" thing which you're now trying to gravy train, how does one "carry themselves on these forums" like a dork?
Oh fuggin' puh-lease. I've been calling people dorks, losers, tards, idiots, dipshits, dumbfucks, homos, fat, dumbshits, doucehbags, and everything else in between loooooong before Dins even knew these boards existed, and will continue to do so as long as it's warranted.
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Van
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Post by Van »

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:
Van wrote:Mgo, the only thing I jumped on there was your labeling of SRV as "pretentious"...

That was just ridiculous. 180 degrees wrong.
What's ridiculous is this belief that you can invalidate what is entirely an opinion. If you disagree, fine, but there's no way an opinionated description can be "180 degres wrong." Not even possible. You have no pool of "evidence" to draw from in order to prove me wrong. This is entirely based on personal perception.
I can label your ill informed opinion as 180 degrees wrong, no problem. See, that'd by my opinion. Difference is, my opinion is echoed and well documented by anybody who ever met the guy and then bothered to state their opinion on the guy. Dude was universally beloved for being one of the nicest, warmest and most down to earth people in the industry. (Same as Vai and Satch, actually, but let's not let your other ill informed opinions get in the way here.) Your opinion is based on...what, exactly?? The fact that you even state such an opinion shows a fairly reckless disregard not only for the truth but also for your own credibility.

I could ask you how you ever came to have such an ass backwards opinion but the very fact that you even have it tells me that it's based on nothing real. You're just carelessly lumping him in with some other world class musicians you've heard mentioned; musicians you also assume to be pretentious.
As for Dins' "dork" thing which you're now trying to gravy train, how does one "carry themselves on these forums" like a dork?
Oh fuggin' puh-lease. I've been calling people dorks, losers, tards, idiots, dipshits, dumbfucks, homos, fat, dumbshits, doucehbags, and everything else in between loooooong before Dins even knew these boards existed, and will continue to do so as long as it's warranted.
Bwaaahaaa!!

"You're fat!!"

I'll grant you that yeah, obviously, you've been calling people names here forever. This new "dork" fixation of yours though never occured until first Dins made it his Dins addled mantra. You and I have been doing this shit for years and I've never changed one iota in my posting style and you're only now trotting it out there??

Sure looks like gravy training.
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Terry in Crapchester
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Post by Terry in Crapchester »

Van wrote:All day long at wrok we entertain ourselves by arguing college football, potential animal fight matchups and Somalian pirate attacks on U.S. warships. It's how we keep our sanity.
Potential animal fight matchups? Dude, I'm sending my 8-year-old to visit you. Throw in potential celebrity death matchups and comic book superheroes, and he'll be in heaven.
War Wagon wrote:The first time I click on one of your youtube links will be the first time.
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

Van wrote:Bwaaahaaa!!

"You're fat!!"
Brevity, salesman. That sentence required brief descriptions. Obviously if I were to make "fat smack" as my M.O. I'd go about it a bit more creatively.
I'll grant you that yeah, obviously, you've been calling people names here forever. This new "dork" fixation of yours though never occured until first Dins made it his Dins addled mantra. You and I have been doing this shit for years and I've never changed one iota in my posting style and you're only now trotting it out there??
Because you've been showing it off at alarming rates recently:
Van wrote:All day long at wrok we entertain ourselves by arguing college football, potential animal fight matchups and Somalian pirate attacks on U.S. warships.
Do you honestly believe anybody could read this and not immediately think *GIANT DORK ALERT*? When TiC comes in here saying you and his 8 year old could be bestest buds, does a signal not go off in your head?
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Post by Van »

Terry in Crapchester wrote:
Van wrote:All day long at wrok we entertain ourselves by arguing college football, potential animal fight matchups and Somalian pirate attacks on U.S. warships. It's how we keep our sanity.
Potential animal fight matchups? Dude, I'm sending my 8-year-old to visit you. Throw in potential celebrity death matchups and comic book superheroes, and he'll be in heaven.
Exactly.

It's like home room. Stupid, but sorta useful.
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Post by Terry in Crapchester »

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:When TiC comes in here saying you and his 8 year old could be bestest buds, does a signal not go off in your head?
If commonality of interests with my kids is the definitive dorkiness factor, then every fan of hip-hop "music" is a serious contender for the title "KING OF ALL DORKS". :lol: :P Yet somehow, I get labeled a dork because I'm not a fan of hip-hop. :?
War Wagon wrote:The first time I click on one of your youtube links will be the first time.
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Van
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Post by Van »

Mgo, or, should I say, The Baddest Dude In The Room, don't even begin to try to tell me that given enough time and enough boredom people don't end up filling time with every stupid machination possible.

Best games, best concerts, best movies, best fuck, worst fuck, fattest chick fucked, funniest drunk story, stupid tortures committed against friends and foes as kids...

Top five All NBA team, best shortstop ever, worst unis ever, worst car you ever owned...whatever. It's all the same.

Nothing unusual there. Man, some of you people are so freaking worried about appearing "cool" here...on the internet?? WTF??
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Post by indyfrisco »

Terry in Crapchester wrote:If commonality of interests with my kids is the definitive dorkiness factor, then every fan of hip-hop "music" is a serious contender for the title "KING OF ALL DORKS".
I have no problem with that label.
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Post by Terry in Crapchester »

Van wrote:Mgo, or, should I say, The Baddest Dude In The Room, don't even begin to try to tell me that given enough time and enough boredom people don't end up filling time with every stupid machination possible.

Best games, best concerts, best movies, best fuck, worst fuck, fattest chick fucked, funniest drunk story, stupid tortures committed against friends and foes as kids...

Top five All NBA team, best shortstop ever, worst unis ever, worst car you ever owned...whatever. It's all the same.

Nothing unusual there. Man, some of you people are so freaking worried about appearing "cool" here...on the internet?? WTF??
I daresay that all of these topics, as well as a myriad of similar topics, have been covered on these boards. More than once, in all likelihood.

Anybody who considers that sort of conversation dorky has had more than enough time to find the door. Just sayin'.
War Wagon wrote:The first time I click on one of your youtube links will be the first time.
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Van
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Post by Van »

Unless he's a life long shut in Mgo's participated in all that same kind of stupid shit himself, guarenteed.

Same goes for everyone else here.
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

If commonality of interests with my kids is the definitive dorkiness factor...
Bro, commonality of interests with anybody's kid is the very definition of dorkiness. The fact I'm seeing you of all people leading the defense against such an allegation is spot-on hilarious. Perfectly fitting.

I'd like to run some experiments. What I want to do is give Van and TiC a whole 12 pack of light beer, 2 hours apiece to consume them, and then put 'em in a room full of drunk, horny sluts who are being paid to show them attention.

Here would be the result, my friends:

Image

Van, let's face it...you'd rather spend your friday nights arguing subspecies of flightless birds with this guy:
Image

Than getting out, throwing a few back, having some good boozed-up laughs, and maybe meeting some new people.

That is what makes you a dork.

Aside from your posts, of course.
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Van
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Post by Van »

Mgo, you're taking it all down to the fact that I don't drink.

So be it.

You're a complete moron for thinking drinking defines "cool" (and yes, that is precisely how you're defining it now), but so be it.

Also, in terms of the whole horny sluts thing, I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that you and your multi thousand posts on many a message board combined with the fact that you're single means that The Michigan Pimp From Hell you most definitely are not...drunk stupid or otherwise.

Mgo, where getting pussy (much less knowing what to do with it ) and being "cool" in general are concerned, yep, you probably wanna pipe down over there.
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

Van wrote:Mgo, you're taking it all down to the fact that I don't drink.
Oh no, not all. Did you skip over the whole "your posting style" part?
You're a complete moron for thinking drinking defines "cool" (and yes, that is precisely how you're defining it now), but so be it.
No, no. "Drinking" in-and-of-istelf doesn't define cool. It's the coolness in all the social settings, situations, and luxuries that follow as a result of said drinking. Suffice it to say, you have no clue what the fuck I'm talking about since you'd rather spend your time arguing over who would win in a fight between an elephant's anus and a monkey with a sac of bananas.
Also, in terms of the whole horny sluts thing, I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that you and your multi thousand posts on many a message board combined with the fact that you're single means that The Michigan Pimp From Hell you most definitely are not...drunk stupid or otherwise.
Post totals?

Did the self-described "cunning linguist" really just lower himself to the .99 cent bin version of smack?

You...? Van? Of all people are you sure YOU want to go there? For that reason, and because, well uhh...you've got me beat there, killer. Add to that, your TOT/SC days...versus mine? Good god, by your measure of "getting some," I'd have been Wilt Chamberlain to your Jess the Rookie.

Of all the possible angles to play that assuredly circled the inside of that wearied, graying dome of yours, you decided to hit me with something that actually bodes BETTER for me?

What the fuck is wrong with you?
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Van
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Post by Van »

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:
Van wrote:Mgo, you're taking it all down to the fact that I don't drink.
Oh no, not all. Did you skip over the whole "your posting style" part?
That was your "aside". You'd already labeled the other as "that is what makes you a dork."

So, yeah, you pinned it down to going out and drinking, which makes you an immature cunt.
You're a complete moron for thinking drinking defines "cool" (and yes, that is precisely how you're defining it now), but so be it.
No, no. "Drinking" in-and-of-istelf doesn't define cool. It's all the social settings, situations, and luxuries that follow as a result of said drinking.
Yeah, Mgo, because I don't drink I never find myself in bars anyway. I never attend social gatherings either. Never meet anybody new.

Things like that are only possible if one drinks. People can't do these things without drinking.

Gotcha. All those countless times I've been in those situations, I guess I was just imagining them then.

You're a fucking moron.
Suffice it to say, you have no clue what the fuck I'm talking about since you'd rather spend your time arguing over who would win in a fight between an elephant's anus and a monkey with a sac of bananas.
You've had the same stupid time waster debates yourself, James Dean.

Suffice it to say that I know exactly what you're talking about. You equate drinking with being cool and non drinking with being uncool. You seem to think drinking is the only social vehicle that's available, because non drinkers can't do all the same things.

In other words, you don't have a fucking clue what you're talking about.
Also, in terms of the whole horny sluts thing, I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that you and your multi thousand posts on many a message board combined with the fact that you're single means that The Michigan Pimp From Hell you most definitely are not...drunk stupid or otherwise.
Post totals?
Yep, aside from your posts, it's pretty easy to picture a single guy in your age group who sports post totals like yours being fairly socially inept, especially where it comes to women. Rather than being out there living the Miller High Life commercial you purport your life to be compared to mine, nope, you're constantly on message boards calling people names and arguing whether one group of college aged kids will beat another in a kid's game that's entirely meaningless to your real life existence.

You're not married (last I remember anyway) and you're not a cripple so what in the fuck are you always doing sitting on a 'puter and dorking around with people about absolute bullshit on BBS message boards?

Who are you to ever pass "cool" judgement on others?? WTF??

Really, you're every bit as dorky as anybody else here, 'cept many of the people here are older and married and they have kids and mortgages and other perfectly valid reasons for being home and fucking around on the computer.

You, being such an Alternative Music Lifestyle Stud and all, shouldn't you actually be out there doing something?? You know, like maybe actually playing an instrument rather than ignorantly bashing those who actually do...Or, here's an idea...Maybe you could actually step away from your computer long enough to go look in the mirror.

You, sir, are in NO position whatsoever to comment on the dorkyness of others. None.

Same fucking pot/kettle shit with you, always, to the Nth degree.
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Post by MiketheangrydrunkenCUfan »

Believe the Heupel wrote:I like the Lips. Nice guys and crazy-good musicians.

Then again, I like SRV as well.
Heh. No shit. I didn't realize being a fan of both was mutually exclusive.
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Post by Dinsdale »

Vannie...take another pill. Relax.

It seems a little sore spot has been found with the Vannar.

It's OK man.

Rather that take precious moments off the top end of your life, you need to find your inner peace.

Embrace your dorkiness, Van.

Control it, rather than continue letting it control you.

Let it be your guiding light.

Let it flow from within you.


Go outside, run into your yard, look to the Heavens, and shout "I AM DORK, HEAR ME ROAR!!!!!!!!!"


Be......all that you can be, Van.


Fucking dork.
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Post by RadioFan »

:lol: :lol: :lol:

I like the Vannar, but damn if Mgo and Dins just didn't make me spit on my monitor.


Hey new dude ...

Take a page from this thread. That is how it's done in here in these types of "Hi, I'm new here" offings from legitimate newbies, which often start off with well-intentioned, well-meaning sentiment, only to turn into a brutal pileon of one of our own. Happens to all of us eventually though, so don't feel too bad for Van.
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Van
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Post by Van »

Yeah, 'cause watching the internet's favorite Starsky & Hutch wannabes dancing in denial is such a heavy cross to bear and all...
Joe Satriani is a mime, right? - 88

Show me your dicks. - trev
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MiketheangrydrunkenCUfan
Baby Bitch
Posts: 2882
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 8:29 am
Location: Tempe, AZ

Post by MiketheangrydrunkenCUfan »

Believe the Heupel wrote:FUCK YOU! You like WEEN! There's NO WAY you aren't a fucking FAGGOT metrosexual!!!! Who doesn't like STEVIE RAY VAUGHN OR THE FLAMING LIPS!

:wink:
Oh yeah, well, you like Bowling for Soup, and they're like the dorkiest dorks to ever dork a dork. Dork.
"Keys, woman!"
MgoBlue-LightSpecial
Eternal Scobode
Posts: 21259
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2005 2:35 pm

Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

Van wrote:dancing in denial
Heh.

Gee Van, what is their to "own up to?" This is a message board. We often call each other names for shits and giggles with no real life aftereffects. That's part of what makes it fun.

I come in here, call you a dork, trying to incite some chuckles from the readers. You? Your last post on page 3 showed me this ain't all fun and games to you. There's some raw venom there. You didn't try to inject one iota of humor. You really are trying to "win" this thing, aren't you? It's cool, dude. If you want it that bad, take the "W."

Cue the "I also was joking! Couldn't you tell?" take in 3...2...1...
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Van
2012 CFB Bowl Pick Champ
Posts: 17017
Joined: Sun Jan 30, 2005 4:38 am

Post by Van »

You have the wrong guy, Mgo. I never pull the shameless backpedal card.
Joe Satriani is a mime, right? - 88

Show me your dicks. - trev
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