T1B

BSmack wrote:Yea, he should have done the moral thing and divorced her after she got fat.

I won't say that he should have divorced her, but there's no fucking excuse, other than a thyroid condition (which she doesn't have) for weighing 300 fucking pounds...especially as a 5 foot-ish woman. One of every spouse's obligations is to care about their appearance and take care of themselves out of respect for their spouse, if nothing else. This is even more true if you're in the public eye.



He should have seen the fat potential in her face back when they were dating. He should have limited her to "practice girl" for this reason alone.

Bsmack wrote:Should he say that before or after the chemo treatments?

Chemo causes weight gain? You might want to submit an article to the New England Journal of Medicine on this topic, as I'm sure the medical community would love to be enlightened on this previously unknown symptom. :roll'em:

There's plenty of ways to approach a spouse who gains weight and help to motivate them to lose the extra lbs. Although favored by most married T1B posters, screaming, "SoooWEEEE, you a fat fucking pig!!!" is not likely to yield positive results. Simply accepting a wife's weight gain and pretending to be happy is a total pussy way out. A little dialogue goes a long way.

Terry in Crapchester wrote:In addition to the cancer, let's not forget that Elizabeth Edwards lost a son in a car accident when he was 16, then made the decision to undergo fertility treatment and bear more children in her late 40's/early 50's. Maybe, just maybe, those two facts have a little to do with her weight. Call it a hunch.

While losing a child would totally crush any parent, quitting on life, laying in bed all day in the dark and drowning your sorrows in fried foods and pizza is not the answer. If my son were to die, god forbid, I'd give my wife a good month to mourn however she damn well pleased. But at some point, those who are alive have to move on. Were she to start to go Mrs Edwards on me I'd approach the topic gently, then about a week later try the "Wake up!" talk, and if none of that worked I'd take her to the doctor to get her put on anti-depressant meds. Watching someone completely let themselves go doesn't serve you, her or her long term health well.

My OL had our son later in life and while it took her closer to a year to lose the weight, rather than the six months or so that it usually takes, she did it with my support. I was about 70/30 postive/negative(stern) and the balance seemed to work. I think a lot of guys (like Edwards) either lack the persuasive skill that it takes to have difficult conversations such as these, or are too spineless to bring it up in the first place.

OCmike wrote:I won't say that he should have divorced her, but there's no fucking excuse, other than a thyroid condition (which she doesn't have) for weighing 300 fucking pounds...especially as a 5 foot-ish woman. One of every spouse's obligations is to care about their appearance and take care of themselves out of respect for their spouse, if nothing else. This is even more true if you're in the public eye.

And you have access to her medical records to know she doesn't have a medical condition?



Hey, the long and the short of it is that the wedding vows I took were "to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

There's nothing in there about from this day forward so long as you stay thin. Nor should there be. Furthermore, just wait until your wife is 50+ and see how well your "70-30" attitude rolls with her post menopause. My guess, maybe not so good.

BTW: I'm betting that Elizabeth Edwards' appearance is hardly a hindrance to John Edwards' political goals. If Nancy Reagan and Barbara Bush didn't kill their husbands careers, then she'll be fine. Besides, there's an obesity epidemic going on. I'm thinking she's got a good chance to tap into the Oprah fan base with her look. You can almost see her Lifetime movie already. Can't you?

BSmack wrote: And you have access to her medical records to know she doesn't have a medical condition?

Considering that about .01% of the population actually has a thyroid condition that causes them to be obese, I feel pretty safe in calling her a garden-variety fatass.

BSmack wrote:Hey, the long and the short of it is that the wedding vows I took were "to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

There's nothing in there about from this day forward so long as you stay thin. Nor should there be.

My wife is the best thing that ever happened to me and I'll be the first to admit it. However, were she to balloon up to 300 lbs, I'd consider that to essentially be false advertising, since she was fit when I met her. Same thing applies to me, which is why she has no problem with me having certain expectations of her. Sorry, but I consider being sexually attracted to your partner to be important. Call me crazy...

Sometimes life intervenes though. Perfect example: Last year I got put on a medication that made me gain 40 lbs in just a few months. Sucks, but what can you do. As soon as I got off of the meds, I immediately began working to get rid of the extra lbs. My wife didn't have to say shit to me, I did it on my own. Why? Because I want to look good for her. She was supportive of me, just as I was supportive when she needed it.

BSmack wrote:Furthermore, just wait until your wife is 50+ and see how well your "70-30" attitude rolls with her post menopause. My guess, maybe not so good.

My wife is half Native American and half Mexican. Believe me, she's got plenty of volatility as part of her personality already. Oh, and save your "firewater" and "boomstick" emails, clones...I'm not reading them. Anywho, she's hardly someone that I can bully or push around. I definitely pick my battles and use positive reinforcement whenever possible (rack my college psychology courses), but at times I outright tell her what I expect of her. Sure, sometimes it leads to battles, but if you do it in the right way and you have a reasonable spouse, they'll usually "see the light" as long as they know that you're coming from a good place.

BSmack wrote:BTW: I'm betting that Elizabeth Edwards' appearance is hardly a hindrance to John Edwards' political goals. If Nancy Reagan and Barbara Bush didn't kill their husbands careers, then she'll be fine. Besides, there's an obesity epidemic going on. I'm thinking she's got a good chance to tap into the Oprah fan base with her look. You can almost see her Lifetime movie already. Can't you?

I would certainly hope that her appearance wouldn't hinder Edwards' career ambitions.

Nancy and Barbara were a bit different though, because both were about 20 years older than Edwards' wife is now, so it's not like anyone's going to be rating senior citizens on their looks. Nancy aside (ugh), I think I remember seeing a picture of Barbara as a young woman where she looked reasonably attractive. Even if I'm wrong about BB, we won't have to worry about Mrs. Edwards getting that old in the first place, as she won't live another ten years if she continues looking like this:

Dudes, nothing beats your McCountry and it's contradictoty, shallow parade of narcissistic loathing.

Promise me you'll never change. Entertainment gold. Pure gold.

Oh I don't know sometimes Marty comes up with some observations and comments that, from an objective viewpoint, ring true in some instances.

You can't always tell when a booger is hanging out your nose or slipped down onto your shirt. Most people won't say anything because they don't care. Your friends and your enemies will say something, for different reasons obviously, but nevertheless ..... now you know you have a piece of snot loose and can do something about it.

Tom In VA wrote:Oh I don't know sometimes Marty comes up with some observations and comments that, from an objective viewpoint, ring true in some instances.

link?

You don't think there's a certain amount of narcissistic ... or self obsessed loathing in the U.S. ?

Pretty much all Marty does is bash Jews and the US. every so often he posts something without sarcasm or intent to bait, but mostly not.

OCmike wrote:

Terry in Crapchester wrote:In addition to the cancer, let's not forget that Elizabeth Edwards lost a son in a car accident when he was 16, then made the decision to undergo fertility treatment and bear more children in her late 40's/early 50's. Maybe, just maybe, those two facts have a little to do with her weight. Call it a hunch.

While losing a child would totally crush any parent, quitting on life, laying in bed all day in the dark and drowning your sorrows in fried foods and pizza is not the answer. If my son were to die, god forbid, I'd give my wife a good month to mourn however she damn well pleased. But at some point, those who are alive have to move on. Were she to start to go Mrs Edwards on me I'd approach the topic gently, then about a week later try the "Wake up!" talk, and if none of that worked I'd take her to the doctor to get her put on anti-depressant meds. Watching someone completely let themselves go doesn't serve you, her or her long term health well.

My OL had our son later in life and while it took her closer to a year to lose the weight, rather than the six months or so that it usually takes, she did it with my support. I was about 70/30 postive/negative(stern) and the balance seemed to work. I think a lot of guys (like Edwards) either lack the persuasive skill that it takes to have difficult conversations such as these, or are too spineless to bring it up in the first place.

Let me try that again one more time:

Terry in Crapchester wrote:let's not forget that Elizabeth Edwards lost a son in a car accident when he was 16, then made the decision to undergo fertility treatment and bear more children in her late 40's/early 50's. Maybe, just maybe, those two facts have a little to do with her weight. Call it a hunch.

Women tend to pack on a few pounds when they get pregnant. When the woman is older, losing that additional weight becomes that much harder. Just sayin'.

And your wife is not comparable to Elizabeth Edwards in this regard. How old was your wife? 30, maybe 35? Big difference from 50 or so.

Nancy and Barbara were a bit different though, because both were about 20 years older than Edwards' wife is now, so it's not like anyone's going to be rating senior citizens on their looks.

George H.W. Bush first ran for President (unsuccessfully) in 1980. Barbara would have been about 54-55 back then, and she didn't look a whole lot better then than she does today.

Elizabeth Edwards is right in the wheelhouse, agewise, that Barbara Bush was in 1980, maybe even a year or two older. And while she's not a hottie by any stretch of the imagination, she's a damn sight more attractive today than Barbara Bush was back then.

OCmike wrote: While losing a child would totally crush any parent, quitting on life, laying in bed all day in the dark and drowning your sorrows in fried foods and pizza is not the answer. If my son were to die, god forbid, I'd give my wife a good month to mourn however she damn well pleased.

one whole month...... :?

no offense Mike, but take it from me when I tell you that you don't know what the fuck you're talking about.....

Felix wrote:
one whole month...... :?

no offense Mike, but take it from me when I tell you that you don't know what the fuck you're talking about.....

As far as losing a child goes, you're right. But I know plenty about dealing with the extreme emotional hardships, both personally and indirectly(family members) that life can throw your way.

But to be honest, I was basically just throwing a number out there. Point being, an endless period of wallowing in self-pity does nothing to help the healing process.

Check your PMs.

In case anybody's interested, Scotch works better than ice cream, and is probably less fattening too

OCmike wrote:
Check your PMS.

FTFY

Terry in Crapchester wrote:Women tend to pack on a few pounds when they get pregnant. When the woman is older, losing that additional weight becomes that much harder. Just sayin'.

And your wife is not comparable to Elizabeth Edwards in this regard. How old was your wife? 30, maybe 35? Big difference from 50 or so.

It's absolutely more difficult to lose ANY kind of weight later in life, but there's still no excuse to still be carrying pregancy weight, especially THAT MUCH weight, several years later.

My wife is half Native American...

Which tribe and what's your point as far as when that time hits? I may need to know this, as my wife is 1/4 Cherokee. Mother-in-law is half, and she's one tough bird.

No smack intended, but Native American? Is that the PC term now? Most I know just call themselves Indians. Do you believe it's racist and insensitive to call them that?

You're not one of those guys who thinks it's offensive to "Native Americans" to nickname a sports teams Redskins are you?

War Wagon wrote:

My wife is half Native American...

Which tribe and what's your point as far as when that time hits? I may need to know this, as my wife is 1/4 Cherokee. Mother-in-law is half, and she's one tough bird.

No smack intended, but Native American? Is that the PC term now? Most I know just call themselves Indians. Do you believe it's racist and insensitive to call them that?

You're not one of those guys who thinks it's offensive to "Native Americans" to nickname a sports teams Redskins are you?

I like to think that I am all native American. You know, being born here and all.

BSmack wrote:
I like to think that I am all native American. You know, being born here and all.

You heap big liberal. Ughh. Many moons of weak takes, since time of great buffalo herd.

War Wagon wrote:

My wife is half Native American...

Which tribe and what's your point as far as when that time hits? I may need to know this, as my wife is 1/4 Cherokee. Mother-in-law is half, and she's one tough bird.

No smack intended, but Native American? Is that the PC term now? Most I know just call themselves Indians. Do you believe it's racist and insensitive to call them that?

You're not one of those guys who thinks it's offensive to "Native Americans" to nickname a sports teams Redskins are you?

My wife is part 1/4 Cherokee and 1/4 some other tribe, whose name escapes me.

My point is that it's been my experience that hispanic women and native american women tend to be raised in homes where fighting amongst the parents is common, and they tend to be...hmmm, how shall I put this..."quite forthcoming" if they've got something they want to get off their chest. This took quite a bit of getting used to for me, especially considering my parents rarely ever fought and if one of them was pissed, they'd either leave the room or sit there and stew in silence. Thanks for this lovely walk down memory lane, fucker. :D

"Native American" has been used for quite some time. I'm personally fine with that or "American Indian". I imagine that many wanted to ditch "Indian", because the name was spawned by Columbus, who thought he'd discovered the West Indies. They're not from India, so why would they want to be called "Indians". I'm fine with that.

"African-Americans" on the other hand, unless referring to someone who actually emigrated from Africa, is completely inane. I refer to blacks as blacks. None I've met seem to have a problem with this, though most of them tend to use "AA".

You don't think "Redskins" is offensive? It's no different than naming your team the "Slanteyes". That bugs the shit out of me, as does naming a team the "Indians". Seriously, how could an indian NOT find this offensive:



Did you know that the indians mascot used to be named "Chief Knock-a-Homa"? I mean, are you freaking kidding me?!

Anyway, "Indians" is on par with a team being the "Negros" or the "Caucasians". Yeah, I'd say that's offensive. Call me crazy... However, I don't have any problem with "Warriors", "Braves", "Seminoles" or any other team named after a tribe. Maybe that's contradictory to some, but those names don't bother me.

OCmike wrote:
Anyway, "Indians" is on par with a team being the "Negros" or the "Caucasians". Yeah, I'd say that's offensive. Call me crazy... However, I don't have any problem with "Warriors", "Braves", "Seminoles" or any other team named after a tribe. Maybe that's contradictory to some, but those names don't bother me.

I prefer to call them "trees" or these days usually just "Cardinal".

OCmike wrote:You don't think "Redskins" is offensive? It's no different than naming your team the "Slanteyes". That bugs the shit out of me, as does naming a team the "Indians".

How about Fighting Irish?

The term "Canuck" was originally a derogatory name for French Canadians; how in the world did they ever get over the insult to the point that it's now something they're proud of?

Did you know that the indians mascot used to be named "Chief Knock-a-Homa"? I mean, are you freaking kidding me?!

No it wasn't, dumbfuck. It was ALWAYS Chief Wahoo- named, btw, after an actual Indian Chief named... Wahoo

Moron

Cuda wrote:
How about Fighting Irish?

I'm 1/4 Irish and I actually think it's pretty funny that a team would be named that, though I can see where it might piss some off. I'm a big ND fan(I'm used to disappointment), but wouldn't care if they changed the name.

Cuda wrote:The term "Canuck" was originally a derogatory name for French Canadians; how in the world did they ever get over the insult to the point that it's now something they're proud of?

Forgot about that one. I guess it's like the retarded "nig*ger", "nigga" thing we have going on in this country, where blacks seem to use the word like a badge of honor.

Cuda wrote:

OCmike wrote:
Did you know that the indians mascot used to be named "Chief Knock-a-Homa"? I mean, are you freaking kidding me?!

No it wasn't, dumbfuck. It was ALWAYS Chief Wahoo- named, btw, after an actual Indian Chief named... Wahoo

Moron

You're right, it was the Milwaukee Braves that had Chief K-a-H. My bad.

Cuda wrote: How about Fighting Irish?

The potato supply seems like it came up short yesterday.

Dinsdale wrote:

Cuda wrote: How about Fighting Irish?

The potato supply seems like it came up short yesterday.

I'm surprised the Redskins don't have an annual parade called "The Trail of Tears".

They should rename the Big East hoops tournament "The Colonists vs the Ellis Island Scrubs."

Dinsdale wrote:They should rename the Big East hoops tournament "The Colonists vs the Ellis Island Scrubs."

What, no love for the "Scalping Savages?"

Dinsdale wrote:They should rename the Big East hoops tournament "The Colonists vs the Ellis Island Scrubs."

OCmike wrote:

Cuda wrote:
How about Fighting Irish?

I'm 1/4 Irish and I actually think it's pretty funny that a team would be named that, though I can see where it might piss some off. I'm a big ND fan(I'm used to disappointment), but wouldn't care if they changed the name.

The most credible version I've heard about how ND got that nickname comes from a football game early in the 20th century. According to the story, ND was losing a game when one of the players spoke up in the huddle: "What's the matter with you guys? You're all Irish, and none of you are fighting."

I'm not saying for certain that took place as a matter of fact, but the rumor of that exchange did get out. Once that happened, it's easy to see how ND came to be called the Fighting Irish. Before that, ND's sports teams were known by a variety of nicknames, most prominently the Ramblers, due to their willingness to travel.

I'm a big ND fan too (duh!), and even I wouldn't mind if they changed the nickname. I doubt they ever will, though. Too much history associated with it.

OCmike wrote:

Dinsdale wrote:

Cuda wrote: How about Fighting Irish?

The potato supply seems like it came up short yesterday.

I'm surprised the Redskins don't have an annual parade called "The Trail of Tears".

We have since 1999, it's called "Football Season".



Sincerely
The Fans