T1B

Mister Bushice wrote:Sorry Whitey. You will not be placed in charge of fencing.

War Wagon wrote:

Mister Bushice wrote:Sorry Whitey. You will not be placed in charge of fencing.

Advance scout team, then? Cool!

War Wagon wrote:Oh great. We have a shit-troll invasion.

Probably need to set up a perimeter and see if this can't be confined.

cinderella_undercover wrote: If you're a prick to me, I'm DEBINITLY staying.

PSUFAN wrote:Do you have any pics of your wife?

That got the author of this thread into the archives.

War Wagon wrote:

cinderella_undercover wrote: If you're a prick to me, I'm DEBINITLY staying.

Get in line, then. Nothing but pricks here.

We can use some strange.

Just one question. Do you swallow?

cinderella_undercover wrote:

PSUFAN wrote:Do you have any pics of your wife?

That got the author of this thread into the archives.

Don't have a "wife".

Doesn't your "archive" have a "weight limit"?

Mister Bushice wrote:

cinderella_undercover wrote:

PSUFAN wrote:Do you have any pics of your wife?

That got the author of this thread into the archives.

Don't have a "wife".

Doesn't your "archive" have a "weight limit"?

Sounds to me like you've outlined your life in two sentences.

No wife

No weight limit concerns.


Since Rumplebeast is already taken, I suggest you frequent the local fast food restaurants in your area. There are herds of heifers chowing down in those establishments who would be more than happy to smother you with the love your mother took away from you, and deservedly so.

cinderella_undercover wrote: And I don't have a wife, because I'm a female.

Mister Bushice wrote: And you expect anyone to believe that your neighbor asked for advice on how to get laid from a dude whose wife is so fucking fat that it's a two day hike just to get to her pussy?

RumpleForeskin wrote:

Bizzarofelice wrote:Stop pondering whether you'll send it or not and just fucking send it. C'mon. Make us laugh. Share with us and we'll share with you. Have some of the Cinder, you'll love it.

Why must I give in so quickly? Ok...ok...here goes. I'm just posting the story. Have fun...


Posted on Feb. 18, 2007:
Ok....How should I begin this one?

My neighbor, my brother, and I met up at Hooters this afternoon to have some beerahs and watch the race. Well, my neighbor and brother are a lot alike. They both work in the blue collar industry and they are just a couple of good ol' boys who like to have fun and talk sh*t.

So we're there at Hooters watching the race and throwin' back some brews and my neighbor decides to ask us for some advice about his marriage and his OL not givin' the poontang up. Well, we talk about it for a little bit and I seriously thought the topic had kind of run its course, so what did I do? I brought up yacht rock and mentioned Michael McDonald. My neighbor says that he liked Michael McDonald and my brother jokingly said, "Well, there is your problem right there. Your woman ain't givin' it up to you because you like Michael McDonald. It's probably that or you are no good in bed, so she is getting her action from somewhere else." My neigbor kind of took it the wrong way and the 2 started to have words. Not a really big deal, but they started raggin' each other more and more as the day went on. Well, after a few more pitchers and a little more raggin' on each other, the conversation between my brother and my neighbor turned into a verbal confrontation. sh*t got real heated. I do what I always do and tried to get my brother out of there which I did and I walked him to his truck while my neighbor just stayed at the table. Well, my brother forgot to get his to go order from the bar, so he walked back in to pick it up. I walked over to the table to try and calm my neighbor down and he says, "f*ck you, Dave! You and your brother are pieces of sh*t! f*ck you, I'm leaving!" Like this sh*t was my fault. I had nothing to do with this whole thing.

My brother gives me a ride home and while we were headed to my house, my neighbor calls me. I answer the phone and these are the exact words that come out of his mouth, "f*ck you, Dave! Next time I see you, I am going to kill you then I'm gonna kill your wife, I'm gonna kill your brother and kill his pregnant wife and I'm gonna kill your dog! What kind of friend are you to let your brother rag on me for 2 hours. If I ever see you again outside, I'm gonna come over and put a bullit in your head. You better stay in your house or you are dead. f*ck you!!!"

So, I stupidly call 911 first cus' I don't know what to do. Dude owns guns and he had officially gone off the deep end by threatening me and my family. Well, I didn't think he was going to go over my house until I got there. Well, he did. He goes over my house and my wife answers the door. He told her, "When I see your husband, I'm gonna kill him and then I'm gonna kill you and kill your dog. Then, I'm gonna blow up your house!" My wife said dude fuggin' drove through his own flower bed and tore up his entire lawn with his jacked up F250. Yard looks like a f*ckin' construction site. He went in the house and got something according to his wife and then he took off. I don't know where he went.

Anyways, this is akward. I pressed charges. They are going to book him with a terroristic threat which could lead up to 1 year in jail and a $5000 fine. We also pressed charges for criminal tresspassing for making threats on our property.

I got the Glock loaded and ready to go and teh wifey has her gun loaded and ready. The police said they would have arrested him right then and there if he was home but they could not. So, we're just gonna have to take our chances when he does get home. The cop said it could take a day or 2 to arrest him because the DA has to accept the charges and the warrant needs to be issued. WTF is that?!?! Dude can come and kill me in my sleep for all I know. Anyways, we'll be waiting. If he steps one foot on my lawn, he is getting a warning shot fired in his direction. Its weird. Dude was a good friend of mine about 4 hours ago. I mean, after everything is said and done, he is still going to be living across the street from me.

Posted Feb 19th, 2007

Serves me right for not taking matters into my own hands.

f*cker lied to the cops when they went to pick him up for the warrant. Dude said he never said anything to my wife that was threatening. He denied everything and his wife fuggin' lied with him. She was standing on the sidewalk (according to my wife) and could hear everything he was saying to my wife. The cop said she claims that she didn't hear anything. Fuggin' c*nt bitch. One minute, she is in our house consoling and apologizing to Danyale for everything her ass-hole husband said to Danyale and then the next day they both commit perjury by falsifying their statements and said nothing like that ever happened. This is such bullsh*t. Dude makes terroristic threats to my wife last night and he is sitting in his house right now playing video games. What the f*ck kind of world do we live in where all you have to do is lie and you get off scott free?

Well, it won't be long before one of his $1000 tires on his big redneck truck has a big fuggin' gash in it.

You still crackin' on my wife?

War Wagon wrote:

cinderella_undercover wrote: And I don't have a wife, because I'm a female.

You'll have to excuse Bushice. He's never been verrah quick on the uptake.

Ok, you're up to 6 whole posts now. You put up a good front. Let's see how you look in the morning.

Stick around. A sincere woman could do wonders for this place. Trev and ang are the only gals with enough gumption to hang with this crowd.

RumpleForeskin wrote:the reinforcements ... Derron

cinderella_undercover wrote:Seriously though, where's the party at?

cinderella_undercover wrote:Seriously though, where's the party at?

The Whistle Is Screaming wrote:our tards are better then their tards.

RadioFan wrote:If you're an actual female, they might, but if you're a guy, they definitely would.

RadioFan wrote:

The Whistle Is Screaming wrote:our tards are better then their tards.

Hell, all our tards have to do is type out a complete thought, in a coherent sentence.

Our tards at least know they are tards.

A very tall order for the typing and thought-impaired, bro.

dot dot dot ryan wrote:

RadioFan wrote:

The Whistle Is Screaming wrote:our tards are better then their tards.

Hell, all our tards have to do is type out a complete thought, in a coherent sentence.

Our tards at least know they are tards.

A very tall order for the typing and thought-impaired, bro.

I could tard the shit out of this place...'sayin.