There oughtta be a public dress code...(!)

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 6:47 am

..and she should be put in charge of enforcing it. This is how a proper woman ought to carry herself.

Just fucking dazzling...

I'm in pain here. Gawd, I sometimes miss my ex wife...

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 6:49 am

I'm not sure if the sweet boobies make up for the greel.

M2 · Post by M2 » Fri Apr 07, 2006 6:53 am

Dinsdale wrote:I'm not sure if the sweet boobies make up for the greel.

Indeed, my fine friend from the North.

m2

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 6:58 am

Dins, when I clicked on this thread and saw that you were the respondant I was thinking...

":meds:

Okay, what kind of half assed but still funny potshot is dude going to turn this into?"

Thought for sure you'd find some way to rip me for it, since you're still breathing.

Anyway, if nitpick we must I'll agree that her nose isn't perfect but I couldn't care less. It fits her and she's beautiful...definitely one of the most underrated hotties around. Searing deep brown eyes, a full, gorgeous mouth, perfect teeth, glowing skin...and real hair! Glossy, classy and classic brunette.

Best of all, she's Odd Hot, which is the best kind of hot.

Add to that fact her comfort in her own skin and she just gets it all done...the right way. There's pure magic there, just in the way she pulls her shoulders back and revels in it.

I'd give her my fucking guitar.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 6:59 am

m2 wrote:Indeed, my fine friend from the North.

Oh, I've been meaning to thank you for taking all that rain in the last month. We had about 6 weeks damn-near straight, and we figured you guys could use the water, and we could use the break from the flooding. It all worked out.

M2 · Post by M2 » Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:08 am

No... thank you.

I've always loved green hair.

m2

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:09 am

Van wrote:Thought for sure you'd find some way to rip me for it, since you're still breathing.

Moi?

Why on earth would you say such a cruel thing, Van?

And furthermore, why do you mischaracterize my posts?

I only stomp people's faces into the mud to the point where their own family can't ID the rotting corpse...because I love.

It's like they say...somewhere: Spareth the rod, spoil the fucking mouthbreating douchebag.

Anyhow, to the point at hand -- I've punched better looking faces in barfights.

DON'T GET ME WRONG -- I'd nail her all week long and twice on Sunday and three times in the butt....but maybe I'm not the most objective guy, since if I was drunk I'd nail my own freaking grandmother...and she's dead.

To each his own, I guess.

Atomic Punk · Post by **Atomic Punk** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:10 am

Chia pets?

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:23 am

She's kinda Mariska Hargitay Hungry Mouthed Hungarian Odd Hot. Severe S&M eyebrows (but not a Unibrow, and thank god not an overly tweezed Ghetto Brow), a solid, character filled child bearing jawline and a thick Boris & Natasha "Moose & Squirrel!" Eastern Blok Femme Fatale accent-on-demand.

Her thighs are sleek and glistening and they speak of the Very Best Unmentionables, through a mouth full of Cocoa Puffs.

She doubtless knows some cool and unusual shit, and she knows exactly where in Prague to ruin you on a rainy Wednesday night.

She'd fuck (really well) in a pew during services, and she'd look the old disapproving biddy in the eye and smile with leering mockery once she'd been discovered.

I need that shit.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:27 am

Van wrote:She'd fuck

Why didn't you say so in the first place?

RACK her, then.

You're right -- she's an angel fallen from the skies.

Who just happened to land on her face.

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:41 am

Nah. Her face is a a definite 7, bare minimum. You'd gladly fuck it, sober. Lucid, even. Throw in the Odd Hot Factor and it's an 8 with a bullet.

Throw in the body and the carriage and she's a definite real world 8. An Odd Hot real world 8 is an ass fucking keeper.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:47 am

Jeebus, Van. You must have tagged some MAJORLY ugly chicks in your day.

Damn. I thought I was bad. If THAT chick looks good to you, you should probably thank God, Buddha, Allah, and any other dieties you can think of that you don't drink. Your ass woulda jumped out a third-story window a long time ago.

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:52 am

Dinsdale wrote:Jeebus, Van. You must have tagged some MAJORLY ugly chicks in your day.

Damn. I thought I was bad. If THAT chick looks good to you, you should probably thank God, Buddha, Allah, and any other dieties you can think of that you don't drink. Your ass woulda jumped out a third-story window a long time ago.

Keep frontin', gigolo.

If something that looked like that should ever deign to hit on you during the playing of the national anthem at a Ducks game you'd be hard pressed to prevent yourself from shopping for a Hammer & Sickle cockring before your Beloveds were down by twenty at the half.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 8:05 am

Van wrote: Keep frontin'

First off, I've laid it to a smoking hottie or two in my day. Maybe even more than that. Not nearly enough to offset the mediocres, but a few, nonetheless.

Second, if you don't ever believe another thing I post, believe this, brother:

When it comes down to brass tacks, I may not be good for too much in this world. I'm never going to be president. There's no chance that I'm ever going to cure cancer. I'm never going to walk on Mars.

And I'm at grips with these things.

But, if there's one thing I'm extraordinarily good at, it's laying the pipe to the skanks. I fuck like a racehorse with a jackhammer dangling between his legs. I'm 38, and I can pitch nuts until the cows come home and go back out in the morning. Female alien bitches from other galaxies scream the garbled syllables that sound like "dinsdale" when they reach extra-terrestial orgasm. Hell, I'm suprised your OL doesn't cry out my name in ecstacy, and I've never even met her.

So, as far as being born with very limited talent, I must say I picked a fine one to have as my only real strength.

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 9:17 am

You and m2 really need to go Bill & Ted on some of m2's carnie ditches...

titlover · Post by **titlover** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 12:27 pm

red x

who the fuck is it?

jtr · Post by **jtr** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 4:40 pm

is your ex wife the one you fucked in a chipotle bathroom?

Mister Bushice · Post by **Mister Bushice** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 5:07 pm

Dinsdale wrote:I'm not sure if the sweet boobies make up for the greel.

I think by "Public Dress Code" He meant "Bag over her head"

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 6:04 pm

jtr wrote:is your ex wife the one you fucked in a chipotle bathroom?

No, that'd be my current wife.

Such things wouldn't be beyond the pale for my ex though either. Such things are pretty much a prerequisite for me from a woman.

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 10:56 pm

:D

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 11:17 pm

Van wrote:..and she should be put in charge of enforcing it. This is how a proper woman ought to carry herself.

Just fucking dazzling...

I'm in pain here. Gawd, I sometimes miss my ex wife...

some of them shemales got some real nice titties these days.

rack plastic surgery/hormone pills

Filthy McNastie · Post by **Filthy McNastie** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 2:53 am

Bubba...

I'm sorry...really...but...

Chick has a Smokin'! body...but the greel has GOT to go...I know you're a good salesman and everything...but...you're not going to sell me on this pony looking hot from the neck up.

That being said...I would fuck her...with the lights on as I've fucked worse...but...and I mean this in the most sincere way...I've fucked TONS better.

L8.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:01 am

I sure like those tits. They look damn nice to me. Fake, I guess.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 5:10 am

Cynic.

There are still gorgeous looking real tits out there, ya' know...

Anyway, again, this thread is about her outfit and how well she carries herself in it. It's not about her face (Which, as I said, is a 7: Above average, and not the least bit unatttractive, but by no means near perfect much less world class...), which is incidental to this thread.

You homos who keep bullshitting about her being ugly...Yeah, right. Internet Pimps, all of you, sure. Most of you hard up blockheads would gakk yourselves stupid if a chick like that so much as puked on you.

M2 · Post by M2 » Sat Apr 08, 2006 5:16 am

Van, I'd bang her.

the other 99% of the board wouldn't have a chance in hell of hittin' it.

I'm there with you on those beautiful natural orb's.

m2

Van · Post by **Van** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 5:50 am

Yeah, that's sure one ugly mug. All the bullshitting feebs here pull MUCH better talent than that most any night down at the Pig & Poke...

Uh huh.

Keep dreamin', internet hero.

Filthy McNastie · Post by **Filthy McNastie** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 6:21 am

Like I said...I would fuck her...but...

I would be afraid I would hit the G spot on the whore...start them legs to shaking like a dog shitting razor blades...which might cause her to have an involuntary neck spasm...and jerk that head back real fast while she's gritting those world class choppers in the throes of a Filthy O O Oooooooorrrrrgasm...and cut my fucking head clean off with that 18" Poulan diamond tipped chainsaw blade looking smile...!

But...I would STILL fuck her...

L8.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 6:38 am

Hey Van...

Are you familiar with the word "consensus?"

It's not a particularly friendly one to you right now.

Maybe it's not a case of "Internet Pimps," but maybe a need to get thee to a house of optomitry, post haste.

m2 wrote:the other 99% of the board wouldn't have a chance in hell of hittin' it.

Oh, c'mon now.

Do you really think I'm any less capable of running game in real life as I am on this board?

Get real, doug.

I've already said I'd nail it without a second thought. I sure the hell wouldn't be parading her in front of my buddies. This is fact, Van. And should they catch me(would be far from the first time), they'd undoubtedly say something like "So, dude....what was up with that bitch's grille last night. You got her doggy, right?"

And trust me, the next day, I wouldn't be the one that was feelling lucky out of the deal.

Just because shit don't work that way in YOUR world, doesn't mean it can't work that way outside of it.

pron · Post by **pron** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 2:03 pm

Dinsdale wrote:Do you really think I'm any less capable of running game in real life as I am on this board?

Oh too easy.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 2:07 pm

And the bullshit continues to flow...

Rooster · Post by **Rooster** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 8:34 pm

"I sure the hell wouldn't be parading her in front of my buddies." --Dinsdale

I call bullshit. If you showed up at the local watering hole with Hillary Swank in tow, you'd be the toast of the neighborhood. No way you wouldn't go out somewhere to be seen in public just so you could nod you head at all the gawkers and wink while saying, "Yeah, dude, I'm hitting that every night."

Rooster

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sat Apr 08, 2006 9:21 pm

Rack the hell outta filthy.

After seeing that last set of pics on her, I will admit she is hot in a weird fukked up kinda way. Just keep them fukkin' teefiz hid, s'alli'msayin'

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Apr 09, 2006 2:18 am

Nothing wrong at all with Odd Hot, which is what she is, and there's nothing wrong with her teeth. She has perfect teeth. She has a large Carly Simon-esque mouth, which is what gives her the somewhat ominous appearance that she could bite through a redwood.

Still though, just look at 'em. Her teeth and her smile are both flawless.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sun Apr 09, 2006 12:47 pm

yes, they are nice teeth. yes, it is a nice mouth. if she was the size of shaq, they'd probably fit her well.

it's all about proportion.

Bobby42 · Post by **Bobby42** » Sun Apr 09, 2006 1:30 pm

Forget about the teeth and her jaw bone structure. How about her voice and that moment in the middle of the night when she would ask:

"You 'bout ready to cum boss?"

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Sun Apr 09, 2006 1:35 pm

more like....

[strong hungarian accent] you want we should make sex now?[/strong hungarian accent]

jtr · Post by **jtr** » Sun Apr 09, 2006 8:08 pm

Van wrote:
jtr wrote:is your ex wife the one you fucked in a chipotle bathroom?
No, that'd be my current wife.

Such things wouldn't be beyond the pale for my ex though either. Such things are pretty much a prerequisite for me from a woman.

So how many public bathrooms you been lucky in?

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Sun Apr 09, 2006 11:54 pm

Props to Van for not being either fucking gay or utterly full of shit like the rest of you losers.

Van · Post by **Van** » Mon Apr 10, 2006 12:26 am

Dio, yep, I don't know who these bullshitters here think they're fooling...

"Fucked up greel..."

"If only she had a bag over her head..."

"Sure as hell wouldn't parade her in front of my buddies!"...

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

X 1000...

Is she the absolute hottest thing going? Of course not. She has a fantastic body and a very interesting, intelligent, exotic and curiously beautiful face with warm, smoky eyes and a dazzling smile. That's way more than enough, and way more than our Internet Pimps here are regularly managing in their desparate social lungings.

Again...Odd Hot. Odd Hot...lasts. It's real.

More importantly she's willing to dress really well when she goes out and the simps in this thread who brag about regularly banging "WAY hotter chicks" (while somehow also banging out thousands of posts here, in between hangovers and community service stints), well...

Yep.

T1B

There oughtta be a public dress code...(!)

There oughtta be a public dress code...(!)

Re: There oughtta be a public dress code...(!)