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Rack Fake Scratch Offs, and the Melts they cause

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:10 am
by Adelpiero
ok.

this guy named Brad, has had a lot of shit go down the past year.

1. Father died last December 24th
2. Mother died March 12th this year
3. Broker mismanaged his trust fund, he lost a bunch of money

Ok, so Saturday is his birthday, and I give him a fake scratch off, was totally legit looking, and he likes scratch offs, so i give him 3 $10 Scratch offs and the fake $10 scratchoff. He wins $20 on one of the 3 real ones, and then proceeds to scratch the fake scratcher, revealing he won $25,000. All of us know it's fake, except him. So he begins to cry, talking about how his life has finally changed, he's finally going to get over for once in his life, the money could be the start of a new direction in his life, blah blah blah. So now we all are in shock, who's going to crush his hopes, break the bad news??? I proceed to tell him, sorry dude, it's a gag scratcher. I wait untill he's thought about all of the things he's going to do with the money, and how badly it will help him. Then i unload the bomb.

He landed a halfass punch, and i do kinda feel it was cruel, but hitting paydirt on that gag gift was nailz!

I'm going to rack myself for the meltdown that i caused



PS He's left several death threats on the recorder!

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:17 am
by Risa
F-

Re: Rack Fake Scratch Offs, and the Melts they cause

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:25 am
by Dinsdale
Adelpiero wrote:1. Father died last December 24th
2. Mother died March 12th this year
3. Broker mismanaged his trust fund, he lost a bunch of money
You forgot --

4. He hangs out with fucking idiots

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:26 am
by Screw_Michigan
Risa wrote:F-
you're fourth grade gpa? or how about:
Risa wrote:F-
F-YOU

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:30 am
by MiketheangrydrunkenCUfan
Man, that is brutal. Funny, but brutal. You're a really swell friend.

B+

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:31 am
by Dinsdale
Screw_Michigan wrote:
Risa wrote:F-
you're fourth grade gpa?
What the fuck is wrong with you?

What on earth went wrong in your brain that you thought that this was somehow witty or clever, you flaming fucking tard?

Fucking A, what's next? Some epic "you work at McDonalds" smack?

The next time the idea strikes you that you might almost be about to post something clever...stop. You aren't.


Oh, and it's "your"-btw. What a great way to run "fourth grade gpa" smack -- by misspelling words that 95% of 4th graders get right.

Moron.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:31 am
by ADAM
Glass Dick?

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:33 am
by Screw_Michigan
Dinsdale wrote:
Screw_Michigan wrote:
Risa wrote:F-
you're fourth grade gpa?
What the fuck is wrong with you?

What on earth went wrong in your brain that you thought that this was somehow witty or clever, you flaming fucking tard?

Fucking A, what's next? Some epic "you work at McDonalds" smack?

The next time the idea strikes you that you might almost be about to post something clever...stop. You aren't.
i'm surprised you were able to put together such a concise take considering it takes you at least 300 words of flagellation before you even get to your point.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 2:44 am
by Dinsdale
Screw_Michigan wrote:i'm surprised you were able to put together such a concise take considering it takes you at least 300 words of flagellation before you even get to your point.
No, my main point started with word #26.

Try again, fucking tard.

You're* a moron.


* -- Just included that line to demonstrate the proper use of the contraction "you're." I pretty much had that one down by fourth grade.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 3:01 am
by Risa
Dinsdale wrote:
* -- Just included that line to demonstrate the proper use of the contraction "you're." I pretty much had that one down by fourth grade.
~cruising over to 88's catholic thread to see if Din's has made
an appearance, thus greenlighting a lame priest sausage joke~

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 3:05 am
by Risa
Screw_Michigan wrote:
Risa wrote:F-
you're fourth grade gpa? or how about:
Risa wrote:F-
F-YOU
It was dumb, man. There are no realistic fake scratch off tickets.
Plus, the listing of tragedies just makes this a lame story. Yeah,
it's real funny when someone who's been through hell gets punked.

That's not funny. That's just lame.

Now, if dude had been the victim of circumstances he put himself in....
that's different. But adel's story sucks. or maybe adel just sucks.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 3:10 am
by Carneliat
Dinsdale wrote:

I pretty much had that one down by fourth grade.
Which time?

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 5:01 am
by lk_pick1
OK, I am turning into one of those sooooooooo not right people, because I actually found that amusing.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 5:31 am
by TenTallBen
Here's looking to the payback...

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 6:04 am
by M2
When you live in the midwest... things just get to you a little bit later than the rest of the world.


Sin,




Image


The same gag was done in this movie 15 years ago


Seems our tard finally saw the movie, and posted about it like it was his idea... pathetic



m2

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 6:07 am
by lk_pick1
You forgot to say Truth.

Dude, everything happens elsewhere before it hits the midwest, didn't you know that?

I'm totally serious. I remember when I had a friend years ago whose father had transferred his business from Santa Barbara to here, for shipping reasons and whatever. She wore Doc Martens. Nobody had ever heard of Doc Martens then. Two years later, they were all the rage.

Seriously, it works that way with everything here.

Although that's a pretty darned old movie.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 6:20 am
by M2
lk_pick1 wrote:You forgot to say Truth.

Dude, everything happens elsewhere before it hits the midwest, didn't you know that?

I'm totally serious.
No... no I didn't.

Thanks though.



m2

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 10:37 am
by tough love
I recall reading about a guy who thought he hit it big after his work chums set him up with a gag lottery win.
He immediately tied into his boss, ripping him a new one while proceeding to quit his job. His chums were trying to shut him up, but the guy was venting big time, and wasn't about to be valved.

Anywho, when it was all said and done, the set up guy was out of a job, and no amount of begging on the part of his chums could get the boss to have him back, reasoning that he doesn't want a person working for his company who feels that way about him.

The story ended with the jobless guy about to drag his chums to court with a law suit over loss of employment earnings or some shit like that.


It's could be the gag that keeps gagging.
Get yours today. :wink:

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 10:45 am
by M2
tough love wrote:I recall reading about a guy who thought he hit it big after his work chums set him up with a gag lottery win.
He immediately tied into his boss, ripping him a new one while proceeding to quit his job. His chums were trying to shut him up, but the guy was venting big time, and wasn't about to be valved.

Anywho, when it was all said and done, the set up guy was out of a job, and no amount of begging on the part of his chums could get the boss to have him back, reasoning that he doesn't want a person working for his company who feels that way about him.

The story ended with the jobless guy about to drag his chums to court with a law suit over loss of employment earnings or some shit like that.


It's could be the gag that keeps gagging.
Get yours today. :wink:
Do they really make "Canadians" get jobs in Canada?

If so, what the hell do you do... outside of keeping the igloo's clear of ice?


m2

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 11:05 am
by tough love
^
I'm pretty sure the above story was American made.


Work is work...I can't speak for others; but I do as little as possible and am now very busy working on ways of doing even less.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 11:10 am
by Atomic Punk
tough love wrote:^
I'm pretty sure the above story was American made.


Work is work...I can't speak for others; but I do as little as possible and am now very busy working on ways of doing even less.
I've heard it also and it prolly was American based.

Back when I was a Naval Officer I worked my ass off making nothing the first 4 years. After making LT (O-3) it was a matter of figuring out how to waste time and go to the exchange, golf, and all the fun stuff while we weren't deployed.

Re: Rack Fake Scratch Offs, and the Melts they cause

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 3:17 pm
by Cicero
Adelpiero wrote:ok.

this guy named Brad, has had a lot of shit go down the past year.

1. Father died last December 24th
2. Mother died March 12th this year
3. Broker mismanaged his trust fund, he lost a bunch of money

Ok, so Saturday is his birthday, and I give him a fake scratch off, was totally legit looking, and he likes scratch offs, so i give him 3 $10 Scratch offs and the fake $10 scratchoff. He wins $20 on one of the 3 real ones, and then proceeds to scratch the fake scratcher, revealing he won $25,000. All of us know it's fake, except him. So he begins to cry, talking about how his life has finally changed, he's finally going to get over for once in his life, the money could be the start of a new direction in his life, blah blah blah. So now we all are in shock, who's going to crush his hopes, break the bad news??? I proceed to tell him, sorry dude, it's a gag scratcher. I wait untill he's thought about all of the things he's going to do with the money, and how badly it will help him. Then i unload the bomb.

He landed a halfass punch, and i do kinda feel it was cruel, but hitting paydirt on that gag gift was nailz!

I'm going to rack myself for the meltdown that i caused



PS He's left several death threats on the recorder!

What a mother fucking piece of shit you are. Nice friend. Did you kick his dog too? It would be one thing to pull the prank on the one friend who has everything and lives a good life. You know the guy who makes a good salary, has a lot going for him, maybe the guy who always seems to fall into money. Then, it would be a good joke b/c he wouldnt be hurt. But, your friend(alledgedly) lost both of his parents in a 6 month period, plus had a good chunk of inheritance taken from him, and you thought it was okay to fuck w/ him?

Nice friend. Did you fuck his wife too??

Re: Rack Fake Scratch Offs, and the Melts they cause

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 3:59 pm
by See You Next Wednesday
Cicero wrote:
Adelpiero wrote:ok.

this guy named Brad, has had a lot of shit go down the past year.

1. Father died last December 24th
2. Mother died March 12th this year
3. Broker mismanaged his trust fund, he lost a bunch of money

Ok, so Saturday is his birthday, and I give him a fake scratch off, was totally legit looking, and he likes scratch offs, so i give him 3 $10 Scratch offs and the fake $10 scratchoff. He wins $20 on one of the 3 real ones, and then proceeds to scratch the fake scratcher, revealing he won $25,000. All of us know it's fake, except him. So he begins to cry, talking about how his life has finally changed, he's finally going to get over for once in his life, the money could be the start of a new direction in his life, blah blah blah. So now we all are in shock, who's going to crush his hopes, break the bad news??? I proceed to tell him, sorry dude, it's a gag scratcher. I wait untill he's thought about all of the things he's going to do with the money, and how badly it will help him. Then i unload the bomb.

He landed a halfass punch, and i do kinda feel it was cruel, but hitting paydirt on that gag gift was nailz!

I'm going to rack myself for the meltdown that i caused



PS He's left several death threats on the recorder!

What a mother fucking piece of shit you are. Nice friend. Did you kick his dog too? It would be one thing to pull the prank on the one friend who has everything and lives a good life. You know the guy who makes a good salary, has a lot going for him, maybe the guy who always seems to fall into money. Then, it would be a good joke b/c he wouldnt be hurt. But, your friend(alledgedly) lost both of his parents in a 6 month period, plus had a good chunk of inheritance taken from him, and you thought it was okay to fuck w/ him?

Nice friend. Did you fuck his wife too??
Don't be so hard Cicero. Adelpiero's own life is so devoid of meaning, such a complete waste of life that it puts the whole idea of God's existence into question, that the only satisfaction he can get out of the overbearing depression, lonliness and lack of meaning that engulsfs his every waking moment is to try and make someone else feel like crap.

Don't criticize the pathetic dregs until you have walked a mile in their shoes.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 4:09 pm
by Dinsdale
^^^Ouch.

If adel is under 18 years of age, I can see how he could do something like that.

If not -- yup, that's a walking talking turd, right there.

Call me "old fashioned," but I don't even understand the thought process that's behind something like that.

What are you going to do for an encore, adel? Get some chick to accuse him of rape? That would be pretty funny when you and your buds all jumped up and yelled "JUST KIDDING!!! WE GOT OVER!!!" at his arraignment.


Hey, I've got an idea...next time he takes a trip, offer to drive him to the airport, and slip a loaded gun into his carry-on when he's not looking.

Or how about wiring a bomb up to the ignition switch of his car? I mean, nothing huge or anything -- if dude dies, you can't laugh in his face, right? Nope, you gotta keep the explosive charge small enough that it only badly disfigures him. At the point, you can follow him into plastic surgery, and remind him of all of your BODE and stuff.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 9:06 pm
by Biggie
Dinsdale wrote:if dude dies, you can't laugh in his face, right?
You just burry him. No sweat.

Image

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 1:05 am
by WhatsMyName
Not that this story was all that entertaining, but I like how people give out grades like "F-" when they themselves never even attempt to be humorous. Seriously, Risa is one boring-ass cunt. If Funny crawled up her snatch and bit her labia, she wouldn't even realize it until it washed out on her period.

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 1:20 am
by Risa
W. Cohen wrote:
Dinsdale wrote:if dude dies, you can't laugh in his face, right?
You just burry him. No sweat.

Image
that's not molly ringwald from 'the stand'?

what's the point, then?

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 1:23 am
by Risa
WhatsMyName wrote:Not that this story was all that entertaining, but I like how people give out grades like "F-" when they themselves never even attempt to be humorous. Seriously, Risa is one boring-ass cunt. If Funny crawled up her snatch and bit her labia, she wouldn't even realize it until it washed out on her period.
Aunt Flo says hello. So does breakfast. God's a bastard; whoever
designed the plumbing needs their ass kicked.

You have no idea. When I'm Queen of the World, I'm giving
every woman a free day's pay for every hour they're laid
up incapacitated by That Time of the Month.

Posted: Tue Apr 18, 2006 2:55 am
by WhatsMyName
Thankfully, the chances of you being Queen of the World are about as likely as Whitey Wagon 's definition of "a raise" changing to something NOT related to the mechanical operation of a forklift.