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Dorm life decades later
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 2:47 am
by Luther
We took Lil Luth up to her all female dorm at the Univ. of Portland today. The weather was great and the Expedition was jammed with all her stuff. After I unloaded all the stuff onto the grassy area in front of her dorm, I saw this short male student pushing a shopping cart toward my direction. He had a great big smile and he says, "How about I give you a hand with all the stuff?" I thanked him and I overlooked the fact that he was about 5'2 (sup TVO) and he had one of those spiked Mohawk hair doo's.
Since Lil Luth was on one of the lower floors, we had to walk up the stairs instead of the elevators. They saved the elevators for floors from 4 to 8. I was really happy to see Mohawk grab that mini-refer and place it on his shoulder for the trek up stairs. As I'm moving the stuff I hear some heavy metal head banging tunes coming from the all male dorm next door. It reminded me back during my freshman year when some tard thought cranking out some tunes past the max would sound good. I always loved the sound of distortion in the morning.
About halfway through the hauling I heard "Stairway to Heaven," and I thought we might have a new dude on the controls next dorm over. When I got to little luth's room I said something like, "At least we have some decent music next door," and she grimaced and said "Isn't Led Zeppelin around the time of when you went to college? Like along the time of Ed Sullivan, Tiny Tim and the Stones?" My jaw dropped at the shear sacrilege of the statement.
I remember splitting the cost my sophomore year to rent a fridge, and I hauled all the beer up in my golf bag. Today, Lil Luth and her roomie have a brand new fridge and Mrs Luth has already stocked the thing. WiFi and Ethernet connections dedicated at her desk. I remember I had one of those plastic pencil sharpeners on my top shelf...the only high tech shit at the time.
I saw the menu's for all the different "food courts." Specialized Mexican grub, Italian, comfort, soups, salad bars, sandwich bars, and even a Vegan section...whatever the fuck that is. Lil Luth also has these "flex points" and she can buy pizza's or whatever, whenever she wants. They even have this thing where the parents can order up monthly cookie/goodie baskets to be delivered.
Tomorrow morning, I'm going to tell Mrs Luth that I'm going back to school to get my Doctorate.
Rip City
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 3:05 am
by The Seer
Instead of ludes, pack ibuprofin....
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 3:06 am
by Dinsdale
Now, waitaminute.
School is like 10 miles or so from Casa de Luth, and she's moving into a dorm?
Was this her decision, or Mr. and Mrs. Luth's?
Because if it's the former, I've got some harsh news for you, dude.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 3:14 am
by War Wagon
Yikes...it's a small world.
Moving my daughter off to college tomorrow
Bottom line is that she's leaving home, and I'm going to miss her.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 3:36 am
by Dinsdale
War Wagon wrote:I'm going to miss her.
We won't.
Sin,
The entire frat next door's loads.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 3:47 am
by War Wagon
Dinsdale wrote:War Wagon wrote:I'm going to miss her.
We won't.
Sin,
The entire frat next door's loads.
I thought you were ignoring me?
Be that as it may, I've a ton more confidence in her being able to handle herself in this new environment than you not having your shriveled ballsack kicked in by the next skank you try to pick up.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 3:52 am
by Dinsdale
War Wagon wrote:you not having your shriveled ballsack kicked in by the next skank you try to pick up.
Bought your daughter some steel-toed workboots for school?
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 4:28 am
by Luther
Ah Dins, they basically highly encourage freshman to live on campus their freshman year. I think you can petition the University for a waiver, but we wanted her to experience what this life is all about. I had some of my best times in and around the college life.
She knows her roommate from High School, but that kid got a waiver to have a car on campus because she goes home on the weekends 3 out of the 4 weeks of the month. The gal has a job and has four other brothers and sisters in a very tight budgeted family. Why they didn't send her to Oregon or OSU is beyond me. I remember cutting the first semester check, and even after all the scholarships, I got faint and fell face first into the dip.
WW, just let Mrs. Wagon do all the buying. I didn't question anything except all the goodies involving the new printer, cables, blah blah etc.
If I hear about some guy with a receding hairline, driving an off white VW van, with a plywood based bed secured with square nut screws, touting the best Oregon beer in the whole wide world, then I'm coming up there to find your ass, Dins.
Rip City
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 6:29 am
by Mister Bushice
Dinsdale wrote:War Wagon wrote:I'm going to miss her.
We won't.
Sin,
The entire frat next door's loads.
A softball player in a dorm full of chicks is not likely to have frat boys on her mind.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 6:54 am
by Cicero
Dorm life was awesome. 7 years ago this month I embarked on the college life. Best time of my life.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 4:02 pm
by Derron
Relax you clones...U of P is fairly tame when compared to other colleges. Soem partying, but nothing along the nature of the gang bangs known as parties at U of O, or OSU. My niece went to U of P and she's basically a modern day prude, but still keep up a decent social life. It's a Catholic school, so the indoctrination still happens.
At OSU, then will give thanks for freshman girls, ( easy POA ) after they get drunk off their ass the first week there. There will be oreintation on how to hot knife hash, where to score weed, the upper class men who will buy beer for girls ( cost is one blow job), how to secure the dorm door so the RA cannot get in whilst you be banging a freshman girl, and how to pull your grades out of the shitter after fucking off all term.
[/quote]A softball player in a dorm full of chicks is not likely to have frat boys on her mind.[quote]
No, but the term pig pile comes to mind. Beware the 5th year senior butch dyke who says eat it or die baby dyke...!!
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 5:01 pm
by Mike the Lab Rat
Ah yes, the joy of the start of college.
Earlier this week, my wife and I were actually looking forward to the return of our student neighbors. All girls, each of whom was a great babysitter who'd watch both of our kids (ages 7 and 2) for about 4-6 hours, for the price of $20. It was awesome. They were all juniors and they expected to move back to the same house next year.
When we heard the telltale slamming of car doors, we looked outside, and instead of the girls from last year, we saw dudes. Dudes in maroon and white fraternity jerseys. DK's.
As my fellow Geneseo alum, Bri, will attest, Delta Kappa Tau is the epitome of gang-raping, drink-til-ya-puke, jumping-guys-as-a-group thugs that give fraternities a bad name. Two of our fraternity's little sisters made the mistake of trusting some "nicer" members of that group twenty years ago and were gang-raped. When they reported the incidents to the cops, they were basically told, "hey, you were stupid enough to go to a DK after-hours party alone, you kind of had to expect it..."
On top of that, this local fraternity (actually, they're a "regional," with a handful of chapters at other SUNY schools) claims maroon and white as their colors. "Theirs" as in if anyone else - other fraternity or sorority, social club, etc., sports those primary colors with a logo, the DK's try to beat them up.
Alpha Chi Rho (my fraternity) has garnet and white as its colors. Garnet is so close to maroon they're pretty much the same. We'd wear our legal colors (and even invite Brothers from Alfred, Clarkson, Syracuse, RPI, Brockport to come on down and do the same).
Yeah, we had some fun with DK's years ago...
Anyhow, my wife and I went over to make nice-nice with the neighbor boys last night (introductions, background, tips on how to have parties without pissing us or the cops off...). The guys seemed nice enough, and I have to remember that these are different kids than the thugs of 20 years ago. They know I'm a Crow (the alum president, in fact) and didn't seem to make any connection to the "ancient history."
Just to be a petty "noodge," I'm flying my garnet-and-white fraternity flag from my house every day.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 5:31 pm
by BSmack
Mike,
I'll be looking forward to regular "DKs in the Mist" updates. Seriously, this is a freakin sitcom in the making.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 7:44 pm
by smackaholic
anybody that knows the difference between garnet and maroon sux cahk.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 7:53 pm
by Rich Fader
smackaholic wrote:anybody that knows the difference between garnet and maroon sux cahk.
...and undoubtedly enjoys it.

Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 9:57 pm
by Mike the Lab Rat
smackaholic wrote:anybody that knows the difference between garnet and maroon sux cahk.
You have to check out Geneseo greeks and their obsession with colors. Chicks would go into full-blown hair-pulling catfights because another sorority busted out "cocoa-and-ecru" shirts that were too similar to their own "chocolate-and-beige."
The representatives from our national HQ could not believe that of all the dumbass issues to focus on, Geneseo's IGC picked that one.
As for the garnet/maroon conflict, whenever a DK would threaten to break my jaw for daring wear our colors, I'd usually explain that I would gladly trade eating soft food through wired jaws for having that lunkhead (and/or his folks) getting sued for so much money that they'd be eating dry catfood for dinner for years.
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 11:09 pm
by Luther
LabRat,
What are you going to do when after the third drunken party, Mrs. LabRat discovers that someone has shit on her prized ruby begonia? Or when you come outside and find out that they've vomited all across the front windshield of your car? Or when you notice a cheap garden hose sticking out of your gas tank and you were left bone dry on a Monday morning?
[align=center]
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?[/align]
Rip City
Posted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 11:34 pm
by Mike the Lab Rat
Luther wrote:LabRat,
What are you going to do when after the third drunken party, Mrs. LabRat discovers that someone has shit on her prized ruby begonia? Or when you come outside and find out that they've vomited all across the front windshield of your car? Or when you notice a cheap garden hose sticking out of your gas tank and you were left bone dry on a Monday morning?
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
Make two phone calls and later watch happily as each of them walks with crutches.
After 23 years here, I'm part of the "townie machine."
:wink:
Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 12:43 am
by Luther
You shit on Mrs. LabRat's ruby begonia? How does this feel, you fuck?"
Rip City
Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 2:25 am
by Ken
War Wagon wrote:Yikes...it's a small world.
Yeah, no shit. You and luth may be the only fathers sending their daughter off to school for their freshman year this month. In fact, I'd bet my house on it.
Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 3:59 am
by War Wagon
Ken wrote:You and luth may be the only fathers sending their daughter off to school for their freshman year this month...
Probably the only two posting at T1B, and I'll bet
your house on that also, Kenneth.
Speaking for parents everywhere, that's some tough stuff to deal with. Especially since that's my only child. I've been trying to prepare myself for this day for months, but nothing can prepare you for that last moment, right after you've given them that last hug, and then it's time to say good-bye.
Generally, I'm not a very sentimental person, but today I had a lump in my throat and a hole in my stomach that I really can't describe. It's not just that I'll miss her, it's because I wonder just how in the heck almost 19 years have gone by so fast. Did I do everything I could to be the best Dad I could be while I still had the chance? Is she as proud of me as I am of her? Probably not, and those thoughts are going to haunt me.
There's no going back, though. There's only moving forward. Just as it was time for her to move on in life, it's also time for her Mom and Dad to move forward...but I'm here to tell you, it's
hard to let go. You spend so many years trying to get your kid ready for this, almost to the complete exclusion of yourself, that when that time finally comes, it seems like there's only emptyness left behind. I left a part of myself in Springfield today that I'll never get back.
Fuggit, I need a beer.
Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 4:53 am
by Qbert
Wagon
before the pile~on commences....you did a pretty good job of getting your youngster into College.
that's not too easy anymore.
(hell, i went and graduated)
be proud of that.
stand Tall!
Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 5:00 am
by Luther
WW did just fine. The last thing I did for Lil Luth was configure her new email. I had to go "Y2K" on the situation and managed to come out looking like I really was some IT guru.
I had a tear in my eye, but I'm not sure if it was because I won't see too much of the LL this year, or if I'm having flashbacks at the diminishing stock portfolio account I have with Piper Jaffrey.
In this argument only, I will staunchly defend the posts of WW. I don't really have an NFL team here in the U & L, but I'm grabbing the CHIEFS for the time being.
Rip City
Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 5:10 am
by Qbert
LUTH
Retirement and College payments....OUCH!
and yet you escaped China without the bird'flu...????
Niiiice Pension....
you did GOOD as well.
...time to EJECT....i'm posting like ken and jack.
Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 4:16 pm
by Derron
but today I had a lump in my throat
I was going to jump all over this one, but in the spirit of empty nester parents, I will let it slide.
Besides, my son called from Japan this morning, and said his next posting is South Fucking Korea. Hopefully for a brief stay, but still not a good part of gook land to be in.
Daughter and BF sprung the engagment thing on us last week, no surprise there, but they just bought a fixer upper house that I have dumped a pile of jackand time into, and want to do this wedding thing next May, which will be about 5 months after the house is done, and she only has 280 guests so far....sigh.....at least she got the college degree and good job first..
Posted: Sun Aug 27, 2006 11:40 pm
by Wolfman
ah college !!
2 observations:
Lab Rat needs to move to a secure area !!
Luther should have shipped Li'l Luth
off to say---FGCU -- so he'd have a reason
to visit paradise !!
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 12:07 am
by War Wagon
Derron wrote:...but in the spirit of empty nester parents...
Speaking of "empty nests", when wifey and I got home yesterday, we decided to tackle the task of cleaning up the pig stye aka her bedroom. For all my daughters good attributes, cleaning her room wasn't one of them. She was a freaking slob. I was reluctant to move that bed, for fear of what I'd find underneath. What a mess.
Two hours, two trash bags, and much scrubbing and vacuuming later, I'd reclaimed that room from being an ecological disaster area.
So it's all fit and ready for human habitation, yet it will remain in awful loneliness. I can't wait for her to come home over the holidays and trash it again.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 12:49 am
by Derron
They don't stay empty long. Out of 5 kids, 2 seem to continually recycle through.
One after his GF kicked him out, and since Mom does eveything for him, no reason to move out.
The other one is in and out, GF's dad kicks him out and then he goes back, or he's dodging bill collectors.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 1:05 am
by Rich Fader
Wolfman, I'm guessing that being both a fraternity alum and a townie (or at least a relatively long-term local), Mike can probably handle himself just fine. WAR age and treachery.
:twisted:
The colors thing's just blowing my mind, Mike. That's messed up. I can't remember ever hearing about that being an issue at my school or anywhere else out here. At UC Riverside we (Phi Kappa Sigma) and Alpha Phi Alpha both used black and old gold, Kappa Alpha Theta used black and yellow gold, and everybody managed to play nice. It's not just that the other two groups were, respectively, a black fraternity and a sorority. I actually don't think it ever occurred to any of the three groups to get all that possessive about "our" colors. Everybody just accepted that Phi Kap, Alpha and Theta had separately picked those colors a long time ago as part of their traditions, and that was cool, and that was that.
UNWAR that Crips and Bloods crap.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 1:10 am
by bbqjones
we were cleaning up the boys room recently and found a used crunchled up condom near the bed. hes almost four and we couldnt remember getting it on anywhere in his room other than the closest when he wasnt around yet and even then we werent using rubbers. quite the enigma
weird shit dude.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 1:26 am
by War Wagon
Some dude like Derron came in there and nailed your old lady while you were passed out on the couch, bbq.
Only logical explanation.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 2:35 am
by jtr
how many of you who just dropped your kids off at college then went to your local supermarket and they are already putting up the halloween decorations and had another moment of reflection?
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 3:14 am
by Y2K
The day Jess left the house his folks had a Thank You party for the staff at the Suicide Hot Line and finally removed the number from Speed Dial.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 12:33 pm
by Mike the Lab Rat
Rich Fader wrote:At UC Riverside we (Phi Kappa Sigma) and Alpha Phi Alpha both used black and old gold, Kappa Alpha Theta used black and yellow gold, and everybody managed to play nice.
At Geneseo, the Phi Kaps gave the probationary Sigma Nu fraternity an ultimatum years ago - drop your national colors and pick new "local" ones, or we'll bury your petition to join IGC. My organization offered to champion their "colors cause," seeing as how we had won our fight with DKT. I was working for our national HQ and knew that our National's executive director/national secretary was friends with the exec directors of both Sig Nu and Phi Kap and that we could get it dealt with from the "top down".
However, the Geneseo Sig Nu guys didn't want to "make waves," caved in and changed their colors to (get this): powder blue and grey.
So, you've got this group of guys claiming a proud tradition and tie to military honor and VMI...boppin' around in a fruity-ass color scheme forced upon them. They were so "proud" of their local colors that they'd hide them and wear party-themed silk-screened T's whenever their national reps or other chapters would visit.
The funny part is that both the Phi Kaps and Sig Nus in Geneseo were dropped by their nationals for failing to pay dues and for violations of risk management policies. Both are now local fraternities and each claims in their histories that they CHOSE to drop ties with their national fraternities to "better explore our local heritage."
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 6:54 pm
by Goober McTuber
Ken wrote:War Wagon wrote:Yikes...it's a small world.
Yeah, no shit. You and luth may be the only fathers sending their daughter off to school for their freshman year this month. In fact, I'd bet my house on it.
Another day, another pathetic effort at smack by Kendra the Wonder Chode.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 7:14 pm
by Rich Fader
Mike the Lab Rat wrote:The funny part is that both the Phi Kaps and Sig Nus in Geneseo were dropped by their nationals for failing to pay dues and for violations of risk management policies. Both are now local fraternities and each claims in their histories that they CHOSE to drop ties with their national fraternities to "better explore our local heritage."
Mmyeahhhh, okay...
I looked up their website and you weren't kidding. Those little shits even still have the skull and bones as their symbol. I noticed a few of the guys are actually wearing our gear. Which is fine, probably,
if they were initiated and in good standing fifteen years ago when National pulled
errrrr they surrendered their charter. Looking at those guys, I'm
very skeptical. Maybe I ought to call up National and have them set up a game of "Bad lawyer! Mauling is not cool."
Seriously, I'm not even going to try to defend (what were then) our guys sweating the Sigma Nus. That's appalling. I wouldn't want our guys done that way, so I don't condone our guys doing others that way.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 7:19 pm
by jiminphilly
War Wagon wrote:Ken wrote:You and luth may be the only fathers sending their daughter off to school for their freshman year this month...
Probably the only two posting at T1B, and I'll bet
your house on that also, Kenneth.
Speaking for parents everywhere, that's some tough stuff to deal with. Especially since that's my only child. I've been trying to prepare myself for this day for months, but nothing can prepare you for that last moment, right after you've given them that last hug, and then it's time to say good-bye.
Generally, I'm not a very sentimental person, but today I had a lump in my throat and a hole in my stomach that I really can't describe. It's not just that I'll miss her, it's because I wonder just how in the heck almost 19 years have gone by so fast. Did I do everything I could to be the best Dad I could be while I still had the chance? Is she as proud of me as I am of her? Probably not, and those thoughts are going to haunt me.
There's no going back, though. There's only moving forward. Just as it was time for her to move on in life, it's also time for her Mom and Dad to move forward...but I'm here to tell you, it's
hard to let go. You spend so many years trying to get your kid ready for this, almost to the complete exclusion of yourself, that when that time finally comes, it seems like there's only emptyness left behind. I left a part of myself in Springfield today that I'll never get back.
Fuggit, I need a beer.
Empty house? You mean the ole' lady isn't chasin you around the house in her undies and carrying you up the stairs for sweet, sweet love making? For cripes sakes, get a grip. The house is empty for the first time in 18 years. You should be banging Mrs. Whitey 3x a day till your sausage falls off from exhaustion. And you crack on me for the wife jokes? I can see Mrs. Whitey layin in her Victoria secret specials rollin her eyes as you ball your eyes out because your miss your daughter and she's probably thinking, Jesus Christ what a pussy.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 7:34 pm
by Goober McTuber
jiminphilly wrote:War Wagon wrote:Speaking for parents everywhere, that's some tough stuff to deal with. Especially since that's my only child. I've been trying to prepare myself for this day for months, but nothing can prepare you for that last moment, right after you've given them that last hug, and then it's time to say good-bye.
Generally, I'm not a very sentimental person, but today I had a lump in my throat and a hole in my stomach that I really can't describe. It's not just that I'll miss her, it's because I wonder just how in the heck almost 19 years have gone by so fast.
There's no going back, though. There's only moving forward. Just as it was time for her to move on in life, it's also time for her Mom and Dad to move forward...but I'm here to tell you, it's hard to let go.
Empty house? You mean the ole' lady isn't chasin you around the house in her undies and carrying you up the stairs for sweet, sweet love making?
I think that was his daughter’s job. That’s why he’s so sad.
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 8:24 pm
by indyfrisco
War Wagon wrote:It's not just that I'll miss her, it's because I wonder just how in the heck almost 19 years have gone by so fast.
What grade did she flunk?
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2006 9:58 pm
by War Wagon
IndyFrisco wrote:War Wagon wrote:It's not just that I'll miss her, it's because I wonder just how in the heck almost 19 years have gone by so fast.
What grade did she flunk?
None. 3.74 GPA
Her B-day in late October just worked out that she started school later.
Oh, and jim...that's the plan I'm working on. Give me a coupla' days, will ya'?
When the time comes for your kid to head off to college, and after you've been married for 23 years, see if that doesn't change somewhat.
Goober, go fuck yourself.