Random thoughts from my first foray into SEC Country...
Posted: Thu Nov 16, 2006 5:48 am
Just got back late last night from my little vacation to Looziana; specifically, N'Awlins and Baton Rouge. While in Baton Rouge I went to the LSU-'Bama game at Tiger Stadium...
-Still shocked at what I saw when I visited the 9th Ward in New Orleans. Even above and beyond the still palpable devastation from Katrina, christ, how on earth did a third world slum like that ever come to exist in modern day America?? That place was fucking embarrassing. I can't believe that was America. Man...
-French Quarter: uniformally great gumbo, hit and miss jambalaya and while beignets are good and all they are in the end just heavy-ish powdered donuts. Nothing too spectacular, but I'm glad to've finally tried 'em. Great atmosphere at Cafe Du Monde. The guitar players in the bars almost universally sucked, or were average at best, which shocked me in a town built on jazz and blues traditions. There was only one good player and a half dozen hacks. Never woulda thunkit but San Francisco and even the Sacramento Delta region completely blow away New Orleans for blues guitarists.
-New Orleans had more than its fair share of morbidly obese black women, which was to be expected. Also to be expected then was the additional fact that I probably saw more insanely hot black women there than I've ever seen anywhere else. Fuck but there were some major league nubian bodies running around in those cafes. Yow.
-Surprisingly little football presence to be felt in New Orleans. Besides the one Reggie Bush billboard off of I-10 near the Superdome there was next to no NFL presence there. Even the LSU presence was fairly low key, with more 'Bama fans trolling Bourbon St than overtly visible LSU fans. Basically, if you weren't looking for it, you might not've ever known you were in a supposed football town.
-Things began to change though once we headed north on I-10 towards Baton Rouge...
-Jeebus but Louisiana is one mostly deserted state! Man, even between two of the state's biggest cities there were stretches of uninterrupted interstate that seemed to go on forever with nary an exit to...anything! Just nothing but one asphalt ribbon snaking its way through swampland forest, for as far as the eye can see. No truck stops, no Wal-Marts, no strip malls, no brothels...nothing. No freeway exits. None. Just keep goin', junior...
-Baton Rouge....Umm, it is the state's capital, right? You'd never know it. If one didn't know any better one would assume LSU is the state capital and Tiger Stadium is the capitol. That entire city is completely wrapped up in LSU football. There is nothing like it on the west coast. Every third vehicle is flying an LSU flag or three. Every building, every billboard, every everything...purple and yellow, with a growling tiger. Young people, AARP members, blue collar workers, whatever...Geaux Tigers!! Just unbelievable to see an entire metropolis devoted to a group of 20-ish year old amatuer football players who've won only two national titles in the program's entire existence, with one of 'em being back in the '50s.
-As grimy, grim and decadent as New Orleans is Baton Rouge is charming, gawdawful conservative and "Old South" beautiful. What a gorgeous city, in terms of the neighborhoods, the flora and fauna and how well maintained everything is there.
-Shit is ENTIRELY closed down on Sundays, and most early evenings every night. I'm talking just about everything. I'm from California. Shit is supposed to be open all night, every night. Fuck!! Shoneys and the ubiquitous Waffle Houses being our only open restaurants at 10:00pm in Baton Rouge is well below average. Is this Baton Rouge, or Mayberry?? Wtf??
-Tailgating at an LSU game...NOT what I expected. It was a 150,000 strong (the crowd guesstimate given by the locals) family picnic. That was easily the most peaceful and pleasant gathering I've ever experienced. Ned Flanders would've been proud. Didn't see one sloppy drunk, though there was lots of drinking. Didn't see one ugly confrontation with visiting 'Bama Fan, though I saw endless instances where LSU Crowd invited visiting 'Bama Fan into LSU Tailgatin' Tent to join in the food and tv watchin'. (Everybody was freaking out over the Georgia-Auburn and S. Carolina-Florida games.) Nobody cusses. Nobody has an unkind word to say about anything. It was like a giant Mormon gathering.
-Speaking of which, I've never seen so many white people in one place in all my life. I'm talking screamingly white, Dockers commercial white, and nothing but white. In California when one thinks of a major university the first thing that comes to mind is...Asians. Might as well call those baby blue pussies in Westwood U.C.R.A., for example. Loads of Asians, and a decent smattering of Latins and blacks. Get off campus and then it's minorities everywhere, to the point where whites in California are literally now a minority.
Not so, at LSU. Among those bazillion or so tailgaters I saw precisely ZERO Asians, Latinos or blacks. I saw two blacks, total, and they were both scalping tickets. Zero Asians or Latinos. At a major university. I was absolutely gobsmacked. After a couple hours of tailgatin' I finally mentioned this phenomenon to my buddy, an LSU alum, and he just sorta thought about it for a moment and then said, "You know, I'd never thought about that before. Now that you mention it though I guess it is pretty much all whites who tail gate."
He guessed that the LSU student population was 90% white, with the few minorities mostly being blacks. Very few Asians ("They're in the sciences, and they don't follow football...") and fewer Latinos.
Once we moved into the stadium for the game I did see two black students. Two. The following day on campus I did see one Asian student riding her bicycle across campus.
Incredible.
-The LSU Sports Complex is pretty remarkable. Man but those people luvs them some LSU teams. That is one impressive group of facilities and the football program (and all its attendant buildings) strides like a colossus across everything. Most every building he showed me, yep, it was a football building...
"The old football weight room. They don't use it any more."
"The new football weight room. It's football players only. Saban insisted on it, as part of his contract."
"The football players academic tutoring facility."
"That's the indoor practice facility."
"That's one of the outdoor practice fields."
"This is their old meeting/film room. It's mostly abandoned now by the football program. Disregard all the football helmets on the walls."
"Those are the new football dorms."
"This is the football history room." (This room was VERY cool. Among all sorts of other football related items it also had all 32 NFL helmets on display with a plaque beneath each helmet listing all current and fomer LSU players for each NFL team.)
"These used to be student dorms, inside the stadium. Huey Long had the stadium built atop the dorms as a means of getting around the rules..."
"Here's Mike's (the LSU tiger mascot) new habitat. (This thing was awesome. They went ahead and built a San Diego Wild Animal Park sized natural habitat for Mike V, their bitchin' tiger, right across the street from the stadium. It's got a pool with flowing water, large climbing posts, heated enclosures...the works. It's got a giant tent shaped net surrounding it, like one of those amusement park batting cages.)
Just so many football related facilites, and that's not even counting all the non football athletic facilities. I highly doubt that too many local recruits ever escape LSU's clutches. It's a whole orgiastic world dedicated to making living deities out of mush brained twenty year old kids. Damn.
-Tiger Stadium is a work in continual progress. Currently it comprises four separate eras of construction. Anyway, once inside the stadium, it doesn't seem as big as the similar seating capacity L.A. Coliseum or Rose Bowl, both of which seem to be far larger and far grander buildings.
-From all accounts this wasn't the greatest of nights to catch the "Tiger Stadium Experience". All the people there kept telling me that it can get so much louder and rowdier than it was for this 'Bama game. As it was, the stadium was about 90% full on a cool, windy night. It was about 50 degrees and most of the locals (and my wife) were about dying from the "cold". (I just kept imagining a December evening game in Camp Randall Stadium or maybe Soldier Field...) The crowd was, again, incredibly well behaved. They have all sorts of choreographed cheers they do for specific things that occur on the field. For example, they all do the Wayne's World "We're Not Worthy!" bow any time their D forces a change of possession.
-In terms of fight songs LSU's are horrible. Utterly lacking in anything resembling an inspirational tone, utterly forgettable.
"Gooooooo Tigers! Gooooooo Tigers! Gooooo Tigers! L...S...U...!"
"Conquest", or "Hail To The Victors"...it ain't.
-Once and for all I can now put to rest the bullshit people have been saying about how badass and downright vicious an SEC crowd can be towards "the enemy". When I told my LSU hosts about how I was warned by the people of this board not to wear any "USC" or especially any "USC: 2003 National Champions" gear they just laughed and said that's just a bunch of nonsense put out by people trying to make 'em sound bad.
I could've ridden in on a white horse while wearing Tommy Trojan's gear and the worst I would've gotten would've been some good natured chants of "Tiger Bait! Tiger Bait!" from the enormous Gathering Of Osmonds. 'Bama fans sporting full 'Bama regalia were literally getting backslaps and even hugs from LSU fans. There were 'Bama fans sprinkled all throughout the stadium (in addition to their one area reserved for them next to their band) and they'd stand up and wave their pom poms and do their 'Bama cheers right in the midst of hordes of LSU fans and nobody'd do anything more than laugh and give 'em some good natured ribbing.
Put it this way: Raider Fan or Coliseum Fan is FAR more vicious to opposing fans than anything that's likely to ever occur at Tiger Stadium, either inside or outside the stadium. LSU fans were the nicest and classiest group of people you'd ever wanna meet. Very much like Nebraksa Fan, from everything I've heard of Corn Fan. These people really give a major crap about having character and behaving with respect and dignity.
I was almost pissed that I didn't see one stereotypical drunken cajun. I was promised I would, too, but none showed themselves.
Didn't get to see any Jessica Simpson/Daisy Dukes either, and goddammit I was really looking forward to seeing scads of scantilly clad SEC coeds doing their FSU Cowgirls thang. Nope, instead, due to the cool weather I'm told, all I got were seas and seas of...chicks in jeans. Now, don't get me wrong, there was a lot of serious coed talent there, with the usual emphasis on bared midriffs and navel piercings, and there was also a wholly refereshing LACK of tats and facial piercings, but all in all the women there were entirely too Ned Flanders wholesome and not nearly SoCal Coed Slutty enough for me.
Yes, I felt a bit cheated. Altogether the weather, the opponent being in the midst of a down year and LSU's self admitted "spoiled by success" fan base conspired to rob me of much of the T&A and the legendary Tiger Stadium Fervor I'd heard about for so long...
I could sure see though where that whole world there must seem like heaven on earth to any kid who gets to live right in the middle of it throughout their college years. No way you'd ever shake that era from your mental landscape.
All of it, that whole beautiful world there in Baton Rouge...all that reflected glory, all that passion, all that architectural granduer...all built on the love of kids playing amatuer football.
Ancient Rome, in the 21st Century.
-Still shocked at what I saw when I visited the 9th Ward in New Orleans. Even above and beyond the still palpable devastation from Katrina, christ, how on earth did a third world slum like that ever come to exist in modern day America?? That place was fucking embarrassing. I can't believe that was America. Man...
-French Quarter: uniformally great gumbo, hit and miss jambalaya and while beignets are good and all they are in the end just heavy-ish powdered donuts. Nothing too spectacular, but I'm glad to've finally tried 'em. Great atmosphere at Cafe Du Monde. The guitar players in the bars almost universally sucked, or were average at best, which shocked me in a town built on jazz and blues traditions. There was only one good player and a half dozen hacks. Never woulda thunkit but San Francisco and even the Sacramento Delta region completely blow away New Orleans for blues guitarists.
-New Orleans had more than its fair share of morbidly obese black women, which was to be expected. Also to be expected then was the additional fact that I probably saw more insanely hot black women there than I've ever seen anywhere else. Fuck but there were some major league nubian bodies running around in those cafes. Yow.
-Surprisingly little football presence to be felt in New Orleans. Besides the one Reggie Bush billboard off of I-10 near the Superdome there was next to no NFL presence there. Even the LSU presence was fairly low key, with more 'Bama fans trolling Bourbon St than overtly visible LSU fans. Basically, if you weren't looking for it, you might not've ever known you were in a supposed football town.
-Things began to change though once we headed north on I-10 towards Baton Rouge...
-Jeebus but Louisiana is one mostly deserted state! Man, even between two of the state's biggest cities there were stretches of uninterrupted interstate that seemed to go on forever with nary an exit to...anything! Just nothing but one asphalt ribbon snaking its way through swampland forest, for as far as the eye can see. No truck stops, no Wal-Marts, no strip malls, no brothels...nothing. No freeway exits. None. Just keep goin', junior...
-Baton Rouge....Umm, it is the state's capital, right? You'd never know it. If one didn't know any better one would assume LSU is the state capital and Tiger Stadium is the capitol. That entire city is completely wrapped up in LSU football. There is nothing like it on the west coast. Every third vehicle is flying an LSU flag or three. Every building, every billboard, every everything...purple and yellow, with a growling tiger. Young people, AARP members, blue collar workers, whatever...Geaux Tigers!! Just unbelievable to see an entire metropolis devoted to a group of 20-ish year old amatuer football players who've won only two national titles in the program's entire existence, with one of 'em being back in the '50s.
-As grimy, grim and decadent as New Orleans is Baton Rouge is charming, gawdawful conservative and "Old South" beautiful. What a gorgeous city, in terms of the neighborhoods, the flora and fauna and how well maintained everything is there.
-Shit is ENTIRELY closed down on Sundays, and most early evenings every night. I'm talking just about everything. I'm from California. Shit is supposed to be open all night, every night. Fuck!! Shoneys and the ubiquitous Waffle Houses being our only open restaurants at 10:00pm in Baton Rouge is well below average. Is this Baton Rouge, or Mayberry?? Wtf??
-Tailgating at an LSU game...NOT what I expected. It was a 150,000 strong (the crowd guesstimate given by the locals) family picnic. That was easily the most peaceful and pleasant gathering I've ever experienced. Ned Flanders would've been proud. Didn't see one sloppy drunk, though there was lots of drinking. Didn't see one ugly confrontation with visiting 'Bama Fan, though I saw endless instances where LSU Crowd invited visiting 'Bama Fan into LSU Tailgatin' Tent to join in the food and tv watchin'. (Everybody was freaking out over the Georgia-Auburn and S. Carolina-Florida games.) Nobody cusses. Nobody has an unkind word to say about anything. It was like a giant Mormon gathering.
-Speaking of which, I've never seen so many white people in one place in all my life. I'm talking screamingly white, Dockers commercial white, and nothing but white. In California when one thinks of a major university the first thing that comes to mind is...Asians. Might as well call those baby blue pussies in Westwood U.C.R.A., for example. Loads of Asians, and a decent smattering of Latins and blacks. Get off campus and then it's minorities everywhere, to the point where whites in California are literally now a minority.
Not so, at LSU. Among those bazillion or so tailgaters I saw precisely ZERO Asians, Latinos or blacks. I saw two blacks, total, and they were both scalping tickets. Zero Asians or Latinos. At a major university. I was absolutely gobsmacked. After a couple hours of tailgatin' I finally mentioned this phenomenon to my buddy, an LSU alum, and he just sorta thought about it for a moment and then said, "You know, I'd never thought about that before. Now that you mention it though I guess it is pretty much all whites who tail gate."
He guessed that the LSU student population was 90% white, with the few minorities mostly being blacks. Very few Asians ("They're in the sciences, and they don't follow football...") and fewer Latinos.
Once we moved into the stadium for the game I did see two black students. Two. The following day on campus I did see one Asian student riding her bicycle across campus.
Incredible.
-The LSU Sports Complex is pretty remarkable. Man but those people luvs them some LSU teams. That is one impressive group of facilities and the football program (and all its attendant buildings) strides like a colossus across everything. Most every building he showed me, yep, it was a football building...
"The old football weight room. They don't use it any more."
"The new football weight room. It's football players only. Saban insisted on it, as part of his contract."
"The football players academic tutoring facility."
"That's the indoor practice facility."
"That's one of the outdoor practice fields."
"This is their old meeting/film room. It's mostly abandoned now by the football program. Disregard all the football helmets on the walls."
"Those are the new football dorms."
"This is the football history room." (This room was VERY cool. Among all sorts of other football related items it also had all 32 NFL helmets on display with a plaque beneath each helmet listing all current and fomer LSU players for each NFL team.)
"These used to be student dorms, inside the stadium. Huey Long had the stadium built atop the dorms as a means of getting around the rules..."
"Here's Mike's (the LSU tiger mascot) new habitat. (This thing was awesome. They went ahead and built a San Diego Wild Animal Park sized natural habitat for Mike V, their bitchin' tiger, right across the street from the stadium. It's got a pool with flowing water, large climbing posts, heated enclosures...the works. It's got a giant tent shaped net surrounding it, like one of those amusement park batting cages.)
Just so many football related facilites, and that's not even counting all the non football athletic facilities. I highly doubt that too many local recruits ever escape LSU's clutches. It's a whole orgiastic world dedicated to making living deities out of mush brained twenty year old kids. Damn.
-Tiger Stadium is a work in continual progress. Currently it comprises four separate eras of construction. Anyway, once inside the stadium, it doesn't seem as big as the similar seating capacity L.A. Coliseum or Rose Bowl, both of which seem to be far larger and far grander buildings.
-From all accounts this wasn't the greatest of nights to catch the "Tiger Stadium Experience". All the people there kept telling me that it can get so much louder and rowdier than it was for this 'Bama game. As it was, the stadium was about 90% full on a cool, windy night. It was about 50 degrees and most of the locals (and my wife) were about dying from the "cold". (I just kept imagining a December evening game in Camp Randall Stadium or maybe Soldier Field...) The crowd was, again, incredibly well behaved. They have all sorts of choreographed cheers they do for specific things that occur on the field. For example, they all do the Wayne's World "We're Not Worthy!" bow any time their D forces a change of possession.
-In terms of fight songs LSU's are horrible. Utterly lacking in anything resembling an inspirational tone, utterly forgettable.
"Gooooooo Tigers! Gooooooo Tigers! Gooooo Tigers! L...S...U...!"
"Conquest", or "Hail To The Victors"...it ain't.
-Once and for all I can now put to rest the bullshit people have been saying about how badass and downright vicious an SEC crowd can be towards "the enemy". When I told my LSU hosts about how I was warned by the people of this board not to wear any "USC" or especially any "USC: 2003 National Champions" gear they just laughed and said that's just a bunch of nonsense put out by people trying to make 'em sound bad.
I could've ridden in on a white horse while wearing Tommy Trojan's gear and the worst I would've gotten would've been some good natured chants of "Tiger Bait! Tiger Bait!" from the enormous Gathering Of Osmonds. 'Bama fans sporting full 'Bama regalia were literally getting backslaps and even hugs from LSU fans. There were 'Bama fans sprinkled all throughout the stadium (in addition to their one area reserved for them next to their band) and they'd stand up and wave their pom poms and do their 'Bama cheers right in the midst of hordes of LSU fans and nobody'd do anything more than laugh and give 'em some good natured ribbing.
Put it this way: Raider Fan or Coliseum Fan is FAR more vicious to opposing fans than anything that's likely to ever occur at Tiger Stadium, either inside or outside the stadium. LSU fans were the nicest and classiest group of people you'd ever wanna meet. Very much like Nebraksa Fan, from everything I've heard of Corn Fan. These people really give a major crap about having character and behaving with respect and dignity.
I was almost pissed that I didn't see one stereotypical drunken cajun. I was promised I would, too, but none showed themselves.
Didn't get to see any Jessica Simpson/Daisy Dukes either, and goddammit I was really looking forward to seeing scads of scantilly clad SEC coeds doing their FSU Cowgirls thang. Nope, instead, due to the cool weather I'm told, all I got were seas and seas of...chicks in jeans. Now, don't get me wrong, there was a lot of serious coed talent there, with the usual emphasis on bared midriffs and navel piercings, and there was also a wholly refereshing LACK of tats and facial piercings, but all in all the women there were entirely too Ned Flanders wholesome and not nearly SoCal Coed Slutty enough for me.
Yes, I felt a bit cheated. Altogether the weather, the opponent being in the midst of a down year and LSU's self admitted "spoiled by success" fan base conspired to rob me of much of the T&A and the legendary Tiger Stadium Fervor I'd heard about for so long...
I could sure see though where that whole world there must seem like heaven on earth to any kid who gets to live right in the middle of it throughout their college years. No way you'd ever shake that era from your mental landscape.
All of it, that whole beautiful world there in Baton Rouge...all that reflected glory, all that passion, all that architectural granduer...all built on the love of kids playing amatuer football.
Ancient Rome, in the 21st Century.