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Who would win in a fight?

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 4:53 am
by MgoBlue-LightSpecial
I see The Alliance is growing strong. Very strong. Membership is increasing. The force is darkening. The Prosthetic Cock becomes bigger, veinier, more penetrating by the day. Libraries all over the country are loaded with these dudes. They slink down in their chairs, LOLing to themselves, wearing their Slipnot sweatshirts with the hood draped over their eyes, and sipping their Dr. Peppers as they pretend to be Darth Maul conquering the internet. These guys aren't playing around. They don't just threaten you; they follow through, with intimidating accuracy. You don't beat The Alliance. You only hope to be around for another day.

The Reindeer are much less systematic, much less dependant on individual roles. They huddle up and attack in groups. The beating and hoofstopping is relentless and severe, with the switch only on auto, until the board pipes up with, "Okay, maybe this guy has had enough." Bringing poor souls to their fucking knees. Except that only fuels them. The Alliance, even on their worst day, still possess basic human emotion. They have the ability to feel. The Reindeer have no understanding of "limits." They don't feel. They have no … perception of morality or decency. They're a little short-sighted. They can't quite see the point or logic in it. Their idea of "polite" is molesting your junk after they've ripped it off.

If you slip once, and fall into a lake full of piranha, you're done. Gonzo. Same deal with the reindeer. The Alliance would have to execute their plan to perfection, because even with one tiny little slip-up, like Dan J's mom not giving him a ride, the reindeer would immediately find their opportunity to devour them in one setting, like Little Mac vs Don Flamenco.

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 4:58 am
by socal
Reindeer in the 8th round by knockout after the Alliance douse themselves in deer urine.

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 6:03 am
by Qbert
i'll take cripple fight + the over.

BOOZE always reigns SUPREME in these here heights....

...let'em sleep it off...they'll lose interest... (Tombstone...if you're keeping track)

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:36 pm
by Ingse Bodil
The Alliance have soccer moms to bail them out of any trouble. The Reindeer have a fat old man who likes to whip them to go 'harder' and 'faster'. Fat old men with whips have been known to prey on boys (and if it's Frisco, the 'boys' wanting to be preyed upon outnumber the fat old men), but soccer moms aren't known for breaking reindeer.

The reindeer will fuck up without proper supervision, while the Alliance -- who has Mom to bail them out and a fat old man whose fetish can be twisted in on itself for certain defeat -- is able to work separately and together; they hold the keys to the kingdom anyway. Reindeer can travel the globe in 24 hours, but no reindeer has shut down the system.

I'll vote for the Alliance. But only if the deciding fight is held near San Francisco, Rio de Janeiro, anywhere in Thailand, or Greenwich Village.