What do you do to relieve stress?

[Mikey]

Every try sticking a rock, some wires and chewing gum up your ass?

LAX passenger hides objects in his body; bomb squad called
His plane was diverted but deemed safe. The Iraqi national, a legal U.S. resident, said he was trying to ease stress. He is turned over to ICE.
By Andrew Blankstein
Times Staff Writer

March 7, 2007

Authorities called in the bomb squad early Tuesday and diverted a flight to Las Vegas after Los Angeles International Airport security screeners found hidden wires and other objects in a body cavity of a Philadelphia-bound passenger.

Fadhel Al-Maliki, a 35-year-old Iraqi national living in Atlantic City, N.J., had been flagged by security officials at LAX and was undergoing a secondary "selectee screening" when he set off a metal detector.

Al-Maliki, a former security guard, told screeners that he knew what had triggered the alarm and proceeded to remove items from his rectum, including a rock, chewing gum and thin wire filament.

Larry Fetters, federal security director at LAX, said at news conference that Transportation Security Administration officers had become alarmed because Al-Maliki was acting strange but initially refused to identify the items he had hidden.

Concern that the objects might be components for an explosive device led airport authorities to call in the Los Angeles Police Department and FBI bomb technicians as well as a hazardous material team.

A preliminary investigation appeared to rule out a theory that Al-Maliki may have been looking for weaknesses in security or was rehearsing for a terrorist act, federal and local law enforcement authorities said.

During questioning, Al-Maliki said the objects in his rectum were used to alleviate stress, federal law enforcement sources said.

The rock, authorities said he told them, was from another planet.

As Al-Maliki was being detained, his two bags were loaded on to US Airways Flight 1422, which took off for Philadelphia with 143 passengers and six crew members on board, said Liz Landau, a spokeswoman for the airline.

Federal officials said the bags had been checked for explosives, chemicals and other hazardous materials using the most modern and extensive screening devices available. Even so, they diverted the aircraft to McCarran International Airport in Las Vegas "out of an abundance of caution."

There, passengers were taken off the plane, which was parked away from the terminal.

Passengers had to leave their carry-on bags aboard, and the plane and their luggage were searched, Landau said.

Federal officials also said a search of Al-Maliki's luggage turned up nothing "hazardous or illegal."

"Based on our investigation, there was no threat to Los Angeles International Airport or the airports in Las Vegas or Philadelphia," said Ethel McGuire, the FBI assistant special agent in charge of the Joint Terrorism Task Force.

Airport police briefly blocked access to roads leading to LAX and diverted vehicle traffic. But no other flights were disrupted at the airport, and Terminal 1, the building used by Southwest Airlines and US Airways, remained open.

After several hours of questioning, the FBI determined that Al-Maliki had not committed a crime, but he was turned over to U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement.

At Tuesday afternoon's news conference, authorities said that Al-Maliki had been in the United States legally since 1994 but that federal officials were reviewing his immigration status because he may have outdated information on his green card.

Law enforcement sources said Al-Maliki previously served time in jail for criminal trespassing in Atlantic City.

In addition, he was arrested on suspicion of possession of a destructive device, but the sources said charges were dropped; details of the incident were unavailable.

A law enforcement source close to the investigation said Al-Maliki spent only a day in Los Angeles, arriving Monday afternoon after taking a flight from Philadelphia.

[YD]

wire?? oh thats different. thats weird. thats.......


so on this friday



/s/

[ChargerMike]

STRESS!!!

I AIN'T GOT NO STINKIN STRESS

[Cicero]

Every try sticking a rock, some wires and chewing gum up your ass?

LAX passenger hides objects in his body; bomb squad called
His plane was diverted but deemed safe. The Iraqi national, a legal U.S. resident, said he was trying to ease stress. He is turned over to ICE.
By Andrew Blankstein
Times Staff Writer

March 7, 2007

Authorities called in the bomb squad early Tuesday and diverted a flight to Las Vegas after Los Angeles International Airport security screeners found hidden wires and other objects in a body cavity of a Philadelphia-bound passenger.

Fadhel Al-Maliki, a 35-year-old Iraqi national living in Atlantic City, N.J., had been flagged by security officials at LAX and was undergoing a secondary "selectee screening" when he set off a metal detector......

No doubt that guy was testing the system to see weaknesses and vulnerabilities.

[Wolfman]

I come here to this board and
feel all the positive vibes !!

[Schmeck]

Every try sticking a rock, some wires and chewing gum up your ass?

He's just trying to be the muslim Magyver.

[Mikey]

Every try sticking a rock, some wires and chewing gum up your ass?

LAX passenger hides objects in his body; bomb squad called
His plane was diverted but deemed safe. The Iraqi national, a legal U.S. resident, said he was trying to ease stress. He is turned over to ICE.
By Andrew Blankstein
Times Staff Writer

March 7, 2007

Authorities called in the bomb squad early Tuesday and diverted a flight to Las Vegas after Los Angeles International Airport security screeners found hidden wires and other objects in a body cavity of a Philadelphia-bound passenger.

Fadhel Al-Maliki, a 35-year-old Iraqi national living in Atlantic City, N.J., had been flagged by security officials at LAX and was undergoing a secondary "selectee screening" when he set off a metal detector......

No doubt that guy was testing the system to see weaknesses and vulnerabilities.

A preliminary investigation appeared to rule out a theory that Al-Maliki may have been looking for weaknesses in security or was rehearsing for a terrorist act, federal and local law enforcement authorities said.

I guess the "federal and local law enforcement authorities" are just trying to throw us all off, then.



Or, maybe the Feds are keeping the local law enforcement authorities in the dark because they suspect them of complicity in the next wave of terrorist airplane bombings.

One way or the other, I'm sure that Dick Cheney is personally involved in the brilliant strategic feint.



Either way, you're a fucking idiot.

[Cicero]

Some of us arent as naive as you are. I have no doubt that the man will continued to be monitored for suspicious activity.

[trev]

Yoga
and
Meditation

[Goober McTuber]

Rum
and
Coke

FTFY

[BSmack]

Some of us arent as naive as you are. I have no doubt that the man will continued to be monitored for suspicious activity.

You should be thanking God and god that men with anal fetishes aren't considered national security threats.

[Cicero]

Clever stuff BSmack.

[Bobby42]

bourbon

[War Wagon]

FTFY

Pathetic. Did you think that was funny? But that's just the way you roll, and then have the audacity to question whether someone else is a "quality" poster. Excuse me while I go vomit.

Do you really not understand why you're considered a lame-ass punk? Derron brings more to the table than you'll ever be capable of.

What a total waste of bandwidth.

----------------------

And in an effort to keep this post on topic, I relieve stress by taking it out on the punching bag otherwise known as Goober McFlapjack

[Dog]

masturbate

[Derron]

I come in here and bitch slap tards.

On the same note, ever see the COPS episode where the cops stop these 2 wiggers and one has an uncapped hype stuck up his ass ??

The cop is fucking grossed out, uncuffs the due and says you take it out bitch.

War Kestering weird objects.

[War Wagon]

I didn't say that I liked what Derron brings to the table, just that he brings more of it.

[War Wagon]

I just know deep down in my heart that upon my return from this meditation break that I would be just as close to wanting to choke off the same offensive buffoons crap cone as readily as before.

Todd, when things at work get hectic and somebody pisses in your corn flakes, you need to say the serenity prayer...

God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to bury the stupid motherfucker
so deep in the woods they'll never find him.

[pron]

What do I do to relieve stress? Trick question, right?

:D

[trev]

Yoga
and
Meditation

Trev, I've never known meditation to be of any help in relieving stress.

I suppose it depends on the person. But if I felt the need to take a half hour break from work to meditate and relieve stress every time I feel like wringing someones neck, I'd be spending a good portion of the work day in a completely unproductive manner. Furthermore, I just know deep down in my heart that upon my return from this meditation break that I would be just as close to wanting to choke off the same offensive buffoons crap cone as readily as before.

To me, meditation performs absolutely no purpose.

1. This doesn't work for people that let small stuff piss them off. Until you get over that, you'll never be de-stressed.

...And then I read what Wags wrote and it's the same sentiment.

.... Uh never mind.

[Mister Bushice]

1. This doesn't work for people that let small stuff piss them off. Until you get over that, you'll never be de-stressed.

Sure....but stress has its purpose.

If stress had a purpose you would have been shower rod fodder 6 months ago.

As it is, we're stuck dealing with your fake ass mother fucking make up "I wasn't really gonna kill myself heh heh" bullshit posts, trying to make yourself legit when no one now would give a shit even if a bus hit your sorry ass while you were on the way to the bed and bath store for designer death curtains and heavy duty hanging rods.

You wanna talk stress? There you go, you sorry ass fuckwad. That's a tub full.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

I come in here and bitch slap tards.

:?

[poptart]

I've never seen Derron come in here when he didn't make an ass of himself.

Nevar.

[Goober McTuber]

FTFY

Pathetic. Did you think that was funny?

Jeez, Whitey, it was just a harmless reset. You seem to take this stuff pretty seriously. Are you going to offer to fight me?

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

Are you going to offer to fight me?

I can fly you into Lancaster, PA on Southwest Airlines and set you up at the local Red Roof Inn all for under $300. When do you want to throw down, faggot?

Sin,
Douchebag

[Derron]

I've never seen Derron come in here when he didn't make an ass of himself.

Nevar.

Please note the tard quote line below for a classic tard blast.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

Please note the sig line below for a classic tard blast.

We all can kiss your fat white ass? Epic "blast."


No, really...

[Derron]

I didn't say that I liked what Derron brings to the table, just that he brings more of it.

I have mad smack and can kick all your asses.

Sin,

Dog Killer
Fence Builder
HVAC Installer
Dyke softball homer

[Derron]

Please note the sig line below for a classic tard blast.

We all can kiss your fat white ass? Epic "blast."


No, really...

Can't fucking read either can you cur dog fucker...dog knot much ??

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

Can't fucking read either can you cur dog fucker...dog knot much ??

Can't read... or can't decipher your drivel?



Huh?

[Derron]

Can't fucking read either can you cur dog fucker...dog knot much ??

Can't read... or can't decipher your drivel?



Huh?

Spelling smack... how fresh...typical of a tard whose cunt started bleeding this morning.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

Spelling smack... how fresh...typical of a tard whose cunt started bleeding this morning.

It's not spelling smack... I really have no fucking idea what word you meant when you mashed:

cur

Spelling smack would be pointing out how someone typed "seperate" instead of "separate."

I think if you polled everyone here, I think you'd get a 100% return on WTF is

cur

Well?

[War Wagon]

umm, ucant?

cur

–noun 1. a mongrel dog, esp. a worthless or unfriendly one.
2. a mean, cowardly person.

Let's use it in a sentence, shall we?

That mangy cur Goobs sure is an annoying little bitch.

[Goober McTuber]

Looks like Kansas City’s premier retard can’t get me off of his mind.

[Tom In VA]

I suggest the two of you just shove a large block of granite connected to some wires with some spicy Eclipse Cinnamon chewing gum up your asses and RELAX.


Sincerely,
Mullah Omar Rectamabad

[Mikey]

bad...

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

umm, ucant?

cur

–noun 1. a mongrel dog, esp. a worthless or unfriendly one.
2. a mean, cowardly person.

Well... fuck me.



I've never heard of that word and seeing it in a Derron post... I just assumed it wasn't a word. If I saw it in some smarty-pants post, like Mike The Lab Rat, I would have looked it up... Damn. I think Derron just got over on me. How will I ever live this down????

[War Wagon]

...can’t get me off of his mind.

Now don't go pulling out the "I'm in your dome" card, Goobs.

When I saw the definition of cur, I immediately thought of you. Words like "worthless" and "cowardly" describe you perfectly.

Don't hate on the messenger.

[Tom In VA]

How will I ever live this down????

Take a nice smooth rock, some cool wintergreen gum, Dentyne Ice is good wire them together and shove it up your ass.


Sincerely,
Waseem Al-Bahtum

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

Woe is me... Derron knew a 3 letter word I've never even heard of...

Is that hotline all those poor SD Charger fans called after being bounced from the playoffs about 6 weeks ago still up and running? I seriously don't know how I will roll out of bed tomorrow and go on with my life.