T1B

Yeah I know, there's been a million (OK maybe a hundred) of these threads, but I just had to rant about this one:

People who tag all of their email as "high" importance. It's fucking annoying, like I'm going to ignore it if it doesn't have a ! next to it, and that everything else I have to do is not "important". What these people should realize is that when they use the !, my brain files it as a ↓.

Hey, you're on the peace train. You can't let little things piss you off.

Went to walmart last night and got some rock, chewing gum and wires. Since then nothing seems to bother me.



Sincerely,
Mohammed Al-Malikibad

rack

Tom In VA wrote:Went to walmart last night and got some rock, chewing gum and wires. Since then nothing seems to bother me.



Sincerely,
Mohammed Al-Malikibad

They're watching you 24/7 now, Abdul.

Why ? Hot rock therapy is all the rage for your yuppie infidels.

If I want to pursue happiness by putting a wired rock up my ass, I am constitutionally protected.

See this pisses me off. And this is no trivial thing. I put a relaxing device up my ass and you infidels get in an uproar. Allah-ooh-Akbar.

WAR Spicy Eclipse Cinnamon Gum


Sincerely,
Osama An-usbah

I swear this happened this morning. Driving south on the 405 near Victory Blvd., all of a sudden brake lights start appearing in front of me (in the #2 lane). Some fuckin truck was doing 40 mph with surrounding traffic at around 65 (yeah, strange for the 405 even at 11:00am)...

Just as I was going to gesture to the fucker to move over, lo and behold a small white car was in front of the truck doing the 40 mph. Yes, predictably is was a winkie, a slope, a gook, a slant-eyed motherfucker that was clutching the steering wheel, trying to choke the life out of it with both hands.....

I swerved in front of the fucker, barely clearing his front bumper, trying to get this idiot's attention, and he continued driving in his coma state. Whoever awarded this fuck a driver's license should be called into court as an accessory to the act when this gook kills someone.


Mexifuckinfornia with slopes driving next to 'em...

Multi-culture this.....

So, did that piss you off?

Tom In VA wrote:Went to walmart last night and got some rock, chewing gum and wires. Since then nothing seems to bother me.

That will fuck up your ghusl something awful though.

I hate office buildings that for some reason feel the need to lock one door and leave the person entering to guess which one is deadbolted to the floor and which one will open. I just about face-planted into one of them earlier this morning. Fortunately, there was no one around to witness my uber-smooveness.

"Let me first get out of the fucking elevator before you folks try to get in..!!"

People who eat food while talking on the telephone.

"Wha? You want me to get my face outta your chest? So, why do you wear those low-cut blouses anyway?"

"OK, just how full does a trashcan have to get before someone around here decides to empty it?"

Little Things That Piss You Off

TVO.

OCmike wrote:I hate office buildings that for some reason feel the need to lock one door and leave the person entering to guess which one is deadbolted to the floor and which one will open. I just about face-planted into one of them earlier this morning. Fortunately, there was no one around to witness my uber-smooveness.

Office Buildings #2.

Why do they feel the need to lock the restrooms in office buildings?

The Seer wrote:Office Buildings #2.

Why do they feel the need to lock the restrooms in office buildings?

So that street people don't come in and piss on the seats.

Restroom stalls where the TP dispenser is so close to the shitter that you can't sit straight.

Handicap stalls that are out of paper.

Men who handle their cock at the urinal, then walk out of the bathroom like it's no big deal to exit without washing their hands and end up leaving pecker tracks all over the office on everything they touch.\

Chicks who shave their eyebrows and draw them back on with a pencil.

People who drive full-sized pickups like they're turbo-charged Porsche 911's.

BSmack wrote:

The Seer wrote:Office Buildings #2.

Why do they feel the need to lock the restrooms in office buildings?

So that street people don't come in and piss on the seats.

YEP

OCmike wrote:I hate office buildings that for some reason feel the need to lock one door and leave the person entering to guess which one is deadbolted to the floor and which one will open. I just about face-planted into one of them earlier this morning. Fortunately, there was no one around to witness my uber-smooveness.

translation: fat cunts ERRRRR trev who are too lazy to flip the two hinges to unlock said door.

bean counters who refuse to fill a position in an understaffed area at work and allow king dipshit to spend 12 days in fucking argentina (i'd pray for him to get castrated at the soccer game he's going to, but he has no nuts to chop off) before giving him four days to follow the local bball team that's going to lose in the first round of the dance because that's just how mike brey fucking rolls.

OCmike wrote: People who drive full-sized pickups like they're turbo-charged Porsche 911's.

My F250 is mothballed. I'm now driving a Hyundai 911.

People that don't say "thank you" when you hold the door for them.

Happened to me tonight! :x

Women who post on internet message boards and don't show their tits.

12 dogs and only 8 buns.

RumpleForeskin wrote:12 dogs and only 8 buns.

So, 4 of the women you've dated had no ass whatsoever, hmmm?

Mister Bushice wrote:

RumpleForeskin wrote:12 dogs and only 8 buns.

So, 4 of the women you've dated had no ass whatsoever, hmmm?

*rimshot*

That is hilarious

Speakin' of little things that piss me off, tards who think they are funny but really are stupid and ghey.

giving money to someone to buy tickets
to a basketball game and they stiff you for it !!
Of course--no one here would do that !!

Senior citizens who hit their brakes as they approach a green light...because it MIGHT turn yellow....and then to red...before their snail-like synapses can react. If your reflexes are that shot, turn in your frigging license.

Truck drivers who apparently believe that stop signs at freeway off-ramps are optional for them. I understand the whole issue of wanting to keep your momentum going. Tough fucking shit. I'm one of those people that actually calls the 1-800 number on the back of your vehicle and reports your ass....after I call the sheriff.

Parents of students who get pissed that I won't meet with them on weekends or evenings to discuss their little delinquents. I tell them that if they want to talk to me, I can be reached at school between 7 am and 4 pm. "But that's when I work!" the assholes say...."Me too," I point out.

"Ladies" with substandard "bathroom etiquette".

A few months before I left my last place of business, we had just moved downstairs to our new office, and I started using the "one person only" bathroom that us gals had. It was great.....except for when you enter after some hooch who has just found it too "taxing" to refill at least ONE of the toilet paper holders? I mean, not only are the rolls "empty", but it looks as if the bitch before me had actually tried to "harvest" as much scrap TP off of those two rolls as she could. God forbid the skank reach across and grab a new roll or two. Oh, wait.....I take that back. This one time, I actually came across a nice and neatly wrapped roll of TP placed right on TOP of the two empty, "vulture picked" rolls which she had just molested. To make matters worse, the slit didn't bother to notice that she didn't quite "hike" the soiled TP far enough to the back of the bowl after wiping......so, it was still floating around in the toilet when I went in there. To boot, her feeble attempt at covering up her putrid ASS smell was foiled when she was too stupid to realize that the aerosol can she was using had a clogged nozzle, and rather than dissolving into the air as a "spray", it was splashed across the walls and toilet seat in a stream! The stench was like a kick in the teeth when I opened up the door to the bathroom?!! I'm just gonna go ahead and ASSUME that this was also the same bitch who was too lazy to grab the "liquid soap refill" underneath the cabinet to fill the hand soap which she was reluctantly about to use, and instead, opted to just fill the remaining remnants with WATER. This is great when you push down on the pump and the soap shoots out at a rapid rate, ricocheting off of your palm and onto your clothes and hair. And if you're looking for paper towels, forget about it. The cunt has already tried to pull ONE out of the dispenser, and instead, pulled out like 30 of them. Rather than stack them neatly on top of the dispenser, she has proceeded to stick them on the counter, smack dab in the middle of the excess water and soap which she had just dribbled off of her "meaty paws" just a few seconds prior.

Also, if or WHEN these women actually DO decide to change out an empty roll, they seem to find it convenient to cram that bad boy in the little 8 x 10in. aluminum sanitary napkin disposal can on the wall.....rather than the 13 gallon garbage can within 2 ft. from the toilet. It's quite the treat to dispose of a used sanitary product, and have it spring back from the can at you like a chicken nugget outta Karen Carpenter's craw. Truly one of the most underrated of bathroom experiences.

Mike the Lab Rat wrote: I'm one of those people that actually calls the 1-800 number on the back of your vehicle and reports your ass.....

You asshole.

At a previous job, there was a notice on the door which read (essentially) the following:

Attention ladies! In the past week the janitorial staff has had to clean smeared feces and menstrual blood off of the toilet seats at the request of employees. This is unacceptable and disgusting! Please have the decency to clean up after yourselves.

----------------------------

It's been my experience that while the average dude may be nastier than the average chick, nasty chicks are far and away more filthy than a dude could ever be. Unwar working in a "professional" environment with people like this.

OCmike wrote:At a previous job, there was a notice on the door which read (essentially) the following:

Attention ladies! In the past week the janitorial staff has had to clean smeared feces and menstrual blood off of the toilet seats at the request of employees. This is unacceptable and disgusting! Please have the decency to clean up after yourselves.

----------------------------

It's been my experience that while the average dude may be nastier than the average chick, nasty chicks are far and away more filthy than a dude could ever be. Unwar working in a "professional" environment with people like this.

Honestly?! I dunno if it's just because we EXPECT dudes to be gross, or what? Bwahahaha! This is typically true though.

I went as far as to send out a company e-mail to the 30+ ladies in the company, regarding the "sanitary napkin bin stuffing". I made is as "cute and clever" as I possibly could, and it seemed to go over pretty well with the "higher ups", so that was nice.

I then brought my own air sanitizer for the womens bathroom, wrote "use it"! on the can with a big sharpie, and stuck it on the toilet tank.

Mike the Lab Rat wrote:I'm one of those people that actually calls the 1-800 number on the back of your vehicle and reports your ass....after I call the sheriff.

If some asshole is tailgating me when I'm going 70-75 then goes around me up at 85 and cuts me off, only to tail gate the next person in his way and said asshole is driving a vehicle with a phone number on it, I'm dialing. Convo goes like this:

ME: Hey, you got some guy driving a vehicle for your company with a license plate ends in 335?
THEM: yeah?
ME: I thought you should know that he's driving 20-25 miles over the speed limit, tailgating and cutting people off. I drive this road all the time and it's drivers like him that cause accidents that other people end up getting killed or hurt in.

Everytime I've called on one of these dipshits I hear a pissed off manager on the other end of the phone thanking me for pointing it out, and telling me that they will take care of it.

No company wants to deal with the mess a stupid fucking idiot propelling several tons of metal at unsafe speeds down a busy highway will make. The CHP will fine their ass for the clean up costs if they're found at fault, and no telling how many lives they'll put at risk or end. You put some moron behind the wheel of a box truck and they think they're invincible. They shouldn't be driving, period. Better that I get them off the road back in the warehouse on a forkllift before they kill a dog, or someone.