T1B

that's right, slapfucks. i've been pumping iron for hours and listening to some paul wall just gettin in the zone for what's to come this summer. june cannot come soon enough. i'm lifting, toning, fucking bitches, and staring down faggots who are afraid to step to me. they don't step and they smart not to.



Paul Wall - March N' Step

I'm grinding
I'm posted up on the block like a stop sign
Raised off of instinct with a mind like Einstein
I'm a certified hustler and a G
Trying to metamorphasize a hundred two a hundred three
I'm chasing after currency and accumulating green
With the heart of a lion, I'm on the grind like a dope fien
I've got the street smarts of Avon Barksdale
I took a couple hits but I'm still flowing like blood cells
My money's empidemic, it multiply fast
I'm grinding in the cut like a piece of broken glass
Addicted to the hustle allergic to being broke
Never falling off cuz I stay on my note

You gotta march like a soldier (now all my hot boys march)
You gotta walk it like you talk it (we got the hot girls dipping)
You gotta march like a soldier (now all my hot boys march)
You gotta walk it like you talk it (we got the hot girls dipping)

fuck yeah!!! that shit straight pumps me the FUCK UP. just like stu scott, tom jackson and the crew, you gonna get JACKED UP!

bring it bitches! just fuckin bring it! it's fucking ON motherfuckers. it's fucking ON!

You doing any spring training events or just waiting for the summer?

That explains the whimpering sounds in the basement. Bring out The Gimp.

hey douche,

i would like to be your first victum. should i pm you my address? or just expect a unexpected visit to my house?

Adelpiero wrote:hey douche,

i would like to be your first victum. should i pm you my address? or just expect a unexpected visit to my house?

i'm sticking to an itenerary, fuckhead. so if you want first dibs of getting beat the fuck down you'll have to fly out to tampa, where the tour starts. i'll gladly roll you before i light up that fairy cicero.

there should be some good deals on hotels in the greater tampa area. i might be able to hook you up with something downtown for like $75 if you can swing the plane ride. i've got some coupons too to some nice Choice hotels. let me know, pindick.

you're gonna be DEAD after you reach PGH, bitch

When you swing thru Cali, lemme know. I'll show up just to see if the color of the bruises match the pink shirt.

I'm not so worried about some angry fat gay guy getting in my face, but I'll bring a Streisand DVD along as a good will gesture.

I'll also dress oddly, to see if your "queer eye for the straight guy" genes will blossom.

I'm good like that. Helpful.

Every morning, when I awake, I thank the sweet Baby Jesus that my area is not on the list of tour cities. I can't wait to read the detailed stories of your collective carnage.

Dude, he's gonna tear up Mechanicsville's asshole with the combined strength of two faggots on a bottle of wine. Don't fuck with the Douche.

I hope Douchebag survives until September so I can beat this faggot senseless, haul him out to the west side and hand him over to migrant melon pickers from Guatamala so they hand have a new bitch to play "el Burro" with as they practice inking "La Raza" slogans on his forehead with their precision "Prison Tat" skills. Don't bother honing up on any spanish Douchebag because I doubt there's any translation for the words they'll have you squeeling bitch.

Cantua Creek or Mendota are definately on your agenda, make your time.

how far into the tour is pburgh? if it's early on, PSU, please refrain from killing him as it would cheat the rest of us. Think of your fellow trolls and just give him a good whipping. No breaking of major bones or anything as a broken femur would probably put him on the DL for the rest of the season.

So, can we all agree then. Let's keep it to deep bruises and lacerations. A stress fracture or two is OK, but, we don't need to have the board speedbag laid up with any sort of joe theisman type appendage breaks.

I have a rolled up Mother Jones magazine that I beat my wife and dog with. I'm going to take it down to the Point and show douchebag a little love with it. If he survives that, I'll roll him up in a shower curtain and throw him on a passing coal barge. The subsequent leg of his tour will therefore be based on where the Ohio River can take him.

i'm fucking sitting back here and laughing my ass off at you pathetic clowns. you have no idea whiat's in store for you. your arrogance is going to get you beat the fuck down. you think you can hang with me and you just have no fucking idea what kind of skill and beatdown ability i possess. i've fucked up more dudes in a week than all of you have combined in your entire, faggoty little lives. you really don't understand what you're dealing with here. i'm fucking dangerous.

Fuck this. Your life will END in Pittsburgh, where the Ohio River BEGINS.

Douchebag wrote:you want first dibs of getting beat the fuck down... there should be some good deals on hotels in the greater tampa area.

fucking tight. rack douchebag. People's Champ would be good to get you riled up, but Paul Wall is 2nd fiddle to any Memphis or Oakland sound. People's Champ is especially 2nd fiddle to Lil Scrappy.

PSUFAN wrote:Fuck this. Your life will END in Pittsburgh, where the Ohio River BEGINS.

make no mistake PSUFAN, YOU are at the top of my list, dickface. ive got something extra special in store for you. invite your wife, your family. i will beat the piss out of you so bad your wife will beg to fuck me. then i'll sit all you down afterwards and force you to drink beers and have a good time with me. you will smile and laugh nervously and I'll tell you that it's okay, i'm not going to hurt you anymore.

fucking BANK on that motherfucker

Sorry, guys - if he starts the tour in Pittsburgh, you're not getting a crack at him. I'll mail you each a puka shell as a remembrance.

I'm gonna call Franco Harris (I know him, asshole.) and we're going to eat you for lunch. Your wine-dark blood will soak that gay pink shirt through, and the birds will pick at your ruined little junk. Franco will pound and pound your eyeglasses into powder with his Carthaginian hammy fist.

fuck off.

where's a good place to grub in pittsburgh? i might catch a pirates game while im there too.

Franco's opening a restaurant on the North Side. He'll be able to serve Douchebag Sushi.

i might catch a pirates game while im there too.

I'm starting to suspect a trolljob. Not even a total douchebag would willingly endure such torment.

Douchebag wrote: You gotta walk it like you talk it (we got the hot girls dipping)

Did he notify SD that he was going to steal from them?

If you get anywhere between Las Vegas and Butte, Montana, I will gladly fight you.

What fighting style did you want to use? Boxing rules? Kickboxing? K1? UFC? Or tae kwon do style where we take turns jumping in the air and kicking in the other person's general direction without getting closer than 6"? If that's what you want to do, I'll just up and kill ya. Let me know how you're rolling this thing so I can brush up on the rules.

Let's do this thing. When & where, douche?

Douche,

If you make it to KC, we'll set up a mini troll stop in your honor. Paul, Wags, dave, Kaley and the whole gang will wait patiently for their turn, and not cut in line.

After all the beatdowns, you can have sex with Lana K.

Later, I'll do an awesome pic wytch of that and everyone will laugh and link to it.

It will be Epcot.

C U in JLY

KC Scott wrote:Paul, Wags, dave, Kaley

Two lards, a tard, and a dude with no nards....I'm sure Douchedawg is shaking in his shoes.

KC Scott wrote:After all the beatdowns, you can have sex with Lana K.

Red Roof rents by the hour?

Sin,
Picker

Dinsdale wrote:

KC Scott wrote:Paul, Wags, dave, Kaley

Two lards, a tard, and a dude with no nards....I'm sure Douchedawg is shaking in his shoes.

Don't sell those guys short, all 4 of 'em together on DB could do something special.

Rootbeer wrote:If you get anywhere between Las Vegas and Butte, Montana, I will gladly fight you.

What fighting style did you want to use? Boxing rules? Kickboxing? K1? UFC? Or tae kwon do style where we take turns jumping in the air and kicking in the other person's general direction without getting closer than 6"? If that's what you want to do, I'll just up and kill ya. Let me know how you're rolling this thing so I can brush up on the rules.

Let's do this thing. When & where, douche?

the only fighting style i use is something called WHOOPASS. i will bring it and bring it hard. i've had black belts try to step to me on numerous occasions. all i do is stand there, watch the sweat drip from their heads while they stand in their faggotty little positions and then out of nowhere i throw a left hook.

on
the
fucking
ground
out
cold

i have to conserve some energy for this tour so most of you will be one punch knockouts. fuckstains like PSUFAN and Y2K i will spend a little more time toying with and tormenting. you DO NOT step to the fucking D and walk away unscathed.

Douchebag-

i know you have said a hundered times you are going to take care of business on this WHOOPASS tour all by yourself, but i want to go. so does li'l T-bag. you can deliver the beat downs and i'll take pictures of all the knocked out fucks getting their eye sockets covered by li'l T-bag. what do you say, bro?

KC Scott wrote:
Don't sell those guys short

Oh, that's exactly what I plan to do. Even if the Dow and Nasdaq jump 5,000 points in a day, I'll still make a killing after Douchedaddy does these clowns up by selling short. All the terrified yelps of "I know you are, but what am I" in the world won't ease the suffering that D-Dawg visits upon this unholy union of suck.


That is, of course unless...


Unless Dave brings his wife. Then all bets are off. I'd be forced to relinquish my charter membership in the Douchebag Fan Club, and I'll even turn in my Secret Douchecoder Ring.


OUT!

Dinsdale wrote:

That is, of course unless...


Unless Dave brings his wife. Then all bets are off.

BEATINGS!






OUCH!

Enigmabag wrote:Douchebag-

i know you have said a hundered times you are going to take care of business on this WHOOPASS tour all by yourself, but i want to go. so does li'l T-bag. you can deliver the beat downs and i'll take pictures of all the knocked out fucks getting their eye sockets covered by li'l T-bag. what do you say, bro?

this kind of shit pumps me up

i have a small crew i roll with in case things get out of hand. sometimes i get so fucking jacked up i don't know how to stop and i beat on somebody's face until death sets in. i can use you to help pull me off fuckwads like PSUFAN if the beating gets too severe. i don't want to murder anyone, but fukin a, shit happens sometimes when adrenaline is doing its thing. you can roll with me on a leg of the tour.

There is no doubt that this board doesn't lack for tough guys.

But all a ya gotta check yourselves, if you're talkin shit to Douchedrag.

Oh sure, some of you are bigger. Some are stronger. Some have trained more in the martial arts.

But none of you have the ANGER that Douche brings.

Take heed, step off.

And to think I got bitched at last week for telling ol' double chin and his little toadie to quit staring at my ass...

See: You don't log in for a couple days, and everyone does a complete 180.

Dude's got 3 chins, atleast. He's gonna have a half dozen or so, when I get done with him.

Douchebag wrote:on
the
fucking
ground
out
cold

Great troll, Wolfman.

Douchebag wrote: on
the
fucking
ground
out
cold

I think that OTFGOC should be our new "RACK".

Douchebag wrote: i have a small crew i roll with in case things get out of hand.

Pssssssst. They only look small next to your giant lump of laffy taffy lookin' ass.