I damn near found myself in the unemployement line today.
Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 1:25 am
This morning at work, I was in the middle of my second cup of joe when I noticed something out of the corner of my eye. So, I turn to get a better look and standing not ten feet away is this dude in a red polo, with collar in full fukking pop!!
My gut reaction was to just walk over there and just knock him out cold. But, somehow, the rational part of my brain was able to take control from my natural instinct to stomp a mudhole in any popped collar wearing fukk. I told myself, self, chill. It ain't worth it. HR wouldn't give a damn about how this fukker had it coming.
I remembered back a few years when one dude at invited a considerably larger dude outside to discuss big dudes opinions of his mom. Well you've heard the old saying, it ain't the size of the dog in the fight.... well, big dog ended up leaving in an ambulance with a busted jaw. Little dog left in the back of a cruiser. Needless to say, he don't work there, no more.
As the rational side gained gained further control, I reasoned, well, it ain't pink. Good fukkin' thing dude doesn't have my wife doing his laundry, as hre policy is pretty much, wash it all in warm. Dude's bright red shirt would be pink by now and I'd be yobless and probably locked up.
A couple of hours later I walked outside during breaktime and damn near tripped over some some young fella doing his best don imus popped collar jean jacket impression. I just laughed and stared up into the heavens and asked god why he tempted me so much.
I think tomorrow I am gonna ask Karen, aka safety hottie, if we can implement some sort of dress code around this place to keep some mutherfukker from getting his ass whupped.
My gut reaction was to just walk over there and just knock him out cold. But, somehow, the rational part of my brain was able to take control from my natural instinct to stomp a mudhole in any popped collar wearing fukk. I told myself, self, chill. It ain't worth it. HR wouldn't give a damn about how this fukker had it coming.
I remembered back a few years when one dude at invited a considerably larger dude outside to discuss big dudes opinions of his mom. Well you've heard the old saying, it ain't the size of the dog in the fight.... well, big dog ended up leaving in an ambulance with a busted jaw. Little dog left in the back of a cruiser. Needless to say, he don't work there, no more.
As the rational side gained gained further control, I reasoned, well, it ain't pink. Good fukkin' thing dude doesn't have my wife doing his laundry, as hre policy is pretty much, wash it all in warm. Dude's bright red shirt would be pink by now and I'd be yobless and probably locked up.
A couple of hours later I walked outside during breaktime and damn near tripped over some some young fella doing his best don imus popped collar jean jacket impression. I just laughed and stared up into the heavens and asked god why he tempted me so much.
I think tomorrow I am gonna ask Karen, aka safety hottie, if we can implement some sort of dress code around this place to keep some mutherfukker from getting his ass whupped.