Joke

[Sirfindafold]

What does 82 year old pussy taste like?





Depends.

[Jack]

That is old!!

*************

A little old lady went into the Bank of America one day carrying a bag of money. She insists that she must speak with the President of the bank to open a savings account because it's a lot of money.

They finally get her into the presidents office and he asks her how much she would like to deposit. She says she has $165,000 and then dumps it out of the bag onto his desk. The president was surprised and of course curious as to how she came by all this cash, so he asks her. The old lady says, "I make bets."

The president replies, "Bets? What kind of bets?" and she says, "For example, I'll bet you $25,000 that your balls are square."

"Ha!" says the president, "That's a stupid bet, you can never win that kind of bet."

The old lady says, "So, would you like to take my bet?"

"Sure," says the president, "I'll bet $25,000 that my balls are not square!"

The little old lady says, "OK, but since there is a lot of money involved is it OK with you if I bring my lawyer with me tomorrow at 10:00 AM to witness?"

"Sure," says the president.

That night the president got very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of a mirror checking his balls, turning from side to side, again and again, thoroughly checking them out until he was sure that there is no way his balls are square and that he will win the bet.

The next morning at 10 AM the little old lady appears with her lawyer at the president's office. She introduces the lawyer to the president and repeats the bet, that $25,000 says the president's balls are square. The president agrees with the bet again and the old lady asks him to drop his pants so they can see. The president does this.

The little old lady looks closely at his balls and then asks if she can feel them.

"Well, OK" says the president, $25,000 is a lot of money, so I guess you should be absolutely sure."

Then he notices that the lawyer is quietly banging his head against the wall and he asks the old lady, "What is wrong with your lawyer?"

She replies, "Nothing, except I bet him $100,000 that by 10 AM today I'd have The Bank of America's president's balls in my hands!"

[Goober McTuber]

A shitty, tired old joke thread? I better get in my shot before this heads to T.R.O.T.S.


What’s the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?

When you drop a load in a washing machine, it doesn’t follow you around for a week.

[smackaholic]

This morning I received a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend who
called 'out-of-the-blue' to see if I was still around. We lost track of
time, chatting about the wild, romantic times we used to enjoy together. I
couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd be interested in meeting up and
rekindling a little of that 'old magic'.

'Wow!' I was flabbergasted.

'I don't know if I could keep pace with you now', I said, 'I'm a bit older
and a bit grayer and balder than when you last saw me. Plus I don't really
have the energy I used to have.'

She just giggled and said she was sure I would 'rise to the challenge'.

'Yeah.' I said. 'Just so long as you don't mind a receding hairline and a
waistline that's a few inches wider these days! Not to mention my total lack
of muscle tone...everything is sagging, my teeth are a bit yellowed and I am
developing jowls like a Great Dane!'

She laughed and told me to stop being so silly She teased me saying that
tubby, gray haired, older men were cute, and she was sure I would still be a
great lover.

Anyway, she giggled and said, 'I've put on a few pounds myself!'

So I told her to get lost.