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Any you're familiar with?

I hear some of you Flyovers talking about Bells, so I might give a sip.


But frankly, as a general rule, any non-U&L brew not named Stone that shows up is usually subpar... we're fucking spoiled like that. That's kinda the beauty of the Granddaddy of Brewfests... each brewery only gets one entry, so they better make it good, or the international brew press will hammer them.


But if one of your pet brews is on there, let me know.


I usually work at the festival, but not this year. But since I'm Dinsdale, I naturally know people... so I'm thinking the beer I consume most of will be that which is handed to me for free... because Free Beer is my favorite brand, with Youboughts being a close second. And since I'm Fucking Dinsdale, I'll of course be hobnobbing and whatsuch with the luminaries of the Beer World... because that is how I roll.


BTW-if any of you idiots recommend anything from New Belgium, I will hunt you down and kill you. Same goes for Rogue and Widmer. I want beer, not fucking swill.


Looks like lots of pales... should be a good lineup.


Oddly absent is the Racoon Lodge. The Godfather of American Craft Brewing, Ron Gansberg, must have pissed someone in the establishment off... probably by being honest about what he thought of certain brews. I've learned that criticizing the wrong folks can make you an outcast real quick... like by saying anything bad about the abominations known as Widmer and Rogue.

Oh great, another beer thread where folks pretend they drink nectar of the gods and not some generic goose piss.



Bring it.

Dinsdale wrote:Oddly absent is the Racoon Lodge. The Godfather of American Craft Brewing, Ron Gansberg, must have pissed someone in the establishment off.

OK, upon further research, not that bad. Ron's partener at the Racoon is still the head honcho of the event... maybe some city-folk brought up conflict of interests or something, or maybe they just didn't have the room to make a bunch of extra beer for the festival. They're usually the smart one, and when everyone else is showcasing their new super-hopped IPA, or some chocolate porter, they always bring something very light, and it's usually a hit with the pussies and chicks.

I hear some of you Flyovers talking about Bells, so I might give a sip.

Why bother? Even if you like it, you'll say it sucks.

And now I'm wondering if the Eugene City Brewery still hands out their interesting promotional schwag at events -- the Eugene City Brewery Condoms.

Never actually wrapped up with one, but I have a couple kicking around somewhere. Some places give you bottle openers, some places keychains, some bottle openers/keychains... they give out rubbers.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:
Why bother? Even if you like it, you'll say it sucks.

Uhm... Einstein...


Stone Brewing is in freaking SoCal. Wanna link up to where I've ever said anything that wasn't a glowing review of their products?


So, is the Bell's Porter worth a fuck, or not? Didn't seem like it was that complicated a question, but sometimes I forget you midwestern folks ain't all that bright.

That guy handing out condoms looked a lot like Mikey. Using careful profiling techniques he selectively handed them out only to self-aggrandizing, toolbelt wearing, squareheaded deck screwing skank seeking, Cali-hating, beer swilling, 40+ U & L'ers. All two of them.

Dinsdale wrote:
Stone Brewing is in freaking SoCal.

At least get the place of origin correct. It's LoCal, not SoCal, and there are a lot of LoCalis who will fight you if they see you if say any different.

And BTW...no Bear Whiz Beer?

It's in the water....that's why it's yellow.



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Mikey wrote:At least get the place of origin correct. It's LoCal, not SoCal, and there are a lot of LoCalis who will fight you if they see you if say any different.

Gee, didn't see [ithat[/i] coming...


Hate to break it to you, but no one outside of Southern california recognizes or gives a fuck what you think people should call you.


Checked a map lately?

And if you get up in my shit and start making statements about SoCal, trust me... the fight will come. 'Round these parts, we have yet another name for your ilk -- we call them "asshats."

mvscal wrote:Anderson Valley B Co. is pretty solid. I haven't had their entry, though.

Noted. I'm a sucker for pales (could I serve up any more softballs to you fuckers in this thread?), so I'll see if I can find them in my stupor... since there may be a private prefunction at Casa De Dins before our chauffeur/bus driver brings us to The Promised Land.

I see your boys at Deschutes have come out of the closet and are entering a wheat beer. How special. I'm sure you're very happy for them.

A sad day, really. If they're cranking out fagbrews, they become "Timmay/YD's Boys"... he actually hangs out with those guys. But since Deschutes opened up shop in Beervana, no big whoop... I can walk/stagger/light-rail it up there and get whatever I want.


BTW-MGO... afterwards, or more likely Saturday, I might just have to check out PDXPopNow... where they shut down a city block and have a big ol' all day/three day concert in the streets for up and coming indie bands.


Yup, you may envy me. RACK my folks for making such a wise choice as to where to drop their combined DNA wasteproduct. Doesn't suck to be a U&Ler right about now.

reporting from Colorado, people seem to really like that Hazed and Infused around here. i've never had it; not tempted to plop 8 bucks on the counter for Boulder Beer beers. they usually aren't very good....and have been around forever, somehow.

Flying Dog's In Heat Wheat is one of the better i've had around here, lately. they have a white beer that's supposed to be the cat's meow....but, some of their other stuff is sorta blah. so, i'll stop short of a total endorsement. Avery used to be OK; my opinion of A abetted by the fact a buddy of mine worked there and had a garage full of beer and never locked the side door.

*flying dog's beers also have Ralph Steadman art on the labels, so i feel good about supporting that.

Dinsdale wrote:

Mikey wrote:At least get the place of origin correct. It's LoCal, not SoCal, and there are a lot of LoCalis who will fight you if they see you if say any different.

Gee, didn't see [ithat[/i] coming...


Hate to break it to you, but no one outside of Southern california recognizes or gives a fuck what you think people should call you.

Nice feint there, spinny. You're obviously too much of a dumbfuck to know the difference.

King Crimson wrote:my opinion of A abetted by the fact a buddy of mine worked there and had a garage full of beer and never locked the side door.

I used to have a similar hookup at the oldest brewery in the U&L -- Saxer... which has since been taken over by Portland Brewing.


A friend-of-a-friend is a big rep for Rogue... I usually manage to bite my lip when he digs into his trunk and produces cases of Youboughts.

Shiner Bock is still the best brewed beer south of the mason-dixon

Dinsdale wrote:Recommendations?

I'm somewhat disappointed that no one wrote:Go fuck yourself, asshole

Fuck, do I have to do everything around here?

Those Bell's porters are pretty good. Would be better if they brought in a batch of Two-Hearted for your festival.

So far, I've got:

MGO -- afraid his midwestern sham will be exposed upon review of the People Who Know What's Up, and therefore recommends against


SoCals -- Will have me continue enjoying most of what Stone offers, just to spite myself

mvscal -- Gives Anderson Valley a thumbs/tongues up, although hasn't gauranteed the particular product, and subtly caused my world to come crashing down by using the Dinsdale Wheat Homosexuality Theory against me

King Crimson -- a thought-provoker for sure. Urges caution with some of the Colorado products... but gives the rest of us reason to be cautious of him, what with that wheat thing and all

Rumps -- still a dweeb



I'll try and remember all this... you're pretty safe in that regard, Rumps.

i'm not a huge wheat beer fan, but i like that one.

i've posted this before Dins, but i used to drink Bert Grant's beer inna day. i'm solid.

as far as the CO beers on your fest list, Boulder Beer=usually sucks, but this one is popular (means nothing, really). Great Divide, seen it at the store, never had it. New B, samo samo with them....but i do like their 1554 Black Ale.

Flying Dog is from Denver.

Screw_Michigan wrote:Those Bell's porters are pretty good.

So let it be written, so let it be done.

Even if I can't get the Homey Hookup, I've got some pilfered tokens from festivals past, so I can buy a few and still get out cheap (even though it's payday... DANGER WILL ROBINSON... DANGER!!!!).


So assuming the line isn't too long and/or the line isn't devoid of hot chicks (often makes my decisions as to which one to sample next), I'll see what I can do... I only have so much liver to go around.

You love me, Dins.

My stepdad's family all live in Portland and Eugene and every time they come down here, they crave the Shiner Bock.

SYHTFOTW

Mikey wrote:And BTW...no Bear Whiz Beer?

It's in the water....that's why it's yellow.

Niiice reset Mikey.



F.T. lives.

LOL!!

I'm glad somebody picked up on that. You must be one old mofo Jay.

Not quite as old as Luther or Mace, but I'm getting there.

Got to see F.S. perform live twice, and they replicated their looping skits exactly like their records, but with audience interaction.

Brilliant, warped and funny stuff.

--He walked into a sandstone building...OUCH, my nose!

I've been trying to lay off the beer lately and have actually lost some weight. Haven't actully had any acohol pass my lips since last Friday...Ok Saturday.

But after reading this thread I may have to pick up a couple or three 22 oz. Ruination IPAs to keep me company in the spa after my workout. Might have to set the timer to have the wife come and check on me though, 'cause the 7.7% ABV and 104 degree water could combine to put me under without knowing it.

Jay in Phoenix wrote:Not quite as old as Luther or Mace, but I'm getting there.

Got to see F.S. perform live twice, and they replicated their looping skits exactly like their records, but with audience interaction.

Brilliant, warped and funny stuff.

--He walked into a sandstone building...OUCH, my nose!

Shadow Valley Condoms...if you lived here you'd be home by now.

Dinsdale wrote:So, is the Bell's Porter worth a fuck, or not?

I'd probably rank it 3rd or 4th as my "favorite" Bell's beer. It's definitely no Amber or Pale Ale. Worth giving a taste, though.

Any beers with tangerine or persimmon flavors?


sin,

MGO

Dinsdale wrote:And since I'm Fucking Dinsdale,

I thought that was Dinstales job.

A little late I know...I would have recommended Allagash.

Dinsdale wrote: (even though it's payday... DANGER WILL ROBINSON... DANGER!!!!).

If you are 40 and single and your spending habits are determined by the proximity of your last payday, you are the fukking grand poobah of losers.

Too bad budgeting isn't in that vast data base of yours, dins.

Damn, did someone take a crap in my mouth while I was sleeping?

What a fucked up night... FUCKED up.

I might elaborate more, as the details start coming back to me.

The lowlights included:

- Telling a cop ahead of time I was about to kill a couple of smartass "security" dorks at the festival... which the cop seemed to agree they had coming, and turned the other way. I got that little issue resolved without going to jail.

- Afterwards, in the bar, having to fight off the advances of a friend's new girlfriend.

- Nonchalantly slipping out of the bar to partake of a little maryjoowanna with one of my old buddies... except by the time I slipped out to join him, he'd been kidnapped by a gang of crackheads who drove him across town. Naturally, his cell battery died while trying to get things resolved... although the short version I heard ended with some beat up crackheads


- Being surrounded by gang-nogs after the bar closed (OK, there was an 86ing involved, but it was about closing time anyway, and it wasn't me being tossed). Didn't actually have to fight anybody, since apparently the lowlifes aren't used to drunken white boy laughing at their intimidation techniques, and suggesting it would be in their better interest to find someone else to hassle... as I laughed more. They believed me... wise move on their part

- Missing the last bus home, then having the cab companies tell me they were much too busy, and call back in an hour or two (since the guy I was going to ride in the cab with and crash in his backyard hammock had been kidnapped at this point). Finally found one, and the white-guy, non-accented, English-speaking driver (haven't seen one of those in years) didn't quite understand "turn right" until I choked him from the back seat and started kicking the windows out... WTF, Chuck?


There was a lot more shit that happened, I just can't remember all of it.


FUCKED up night... I want a do-over.


I have no problems dealing with the consequences of my actions... hell, I routinely dare the consequences of my actions to catch up with me. But when I'm minding my own business and the shit crashes down on me, several times in one fucking evening, I'm not so down. Fuck just about everyone I dealt with last night.


I shall now hook up with The Slumpbuster, and see if she can't suck this hangover out the end of my dick.

^^^ Scroll wheel...Check.

Go fuck yourself.

Screw_Michigan wrote:^^^ Scroll wheel...Check.

Go fuck yourself.

Is there a bigger act of KYOA on these baords than this tired act?


There probably is, but SM would need to gain a few IQ points to figure them out, so he sticks with the basics.


Maybe next time, you can try and IKYABWAI me to death.

Well, this might be too late, since today is the last day, but in honor of Fester you should really try Summit Brewing's Extra Pale Ale. It's one of his favorites. Other than that, looks like many of the Midwest's best elected to avoid your little festival. Bell's makes some excellent ales, but I don't care for porters.

Not that many breweries represented there. Does each brewery really only bring one style of beer? At the Great Taste of the Midwest brewfest, each one brings 3-6 different brews. Looks like maybe 8 or 10 pales there. I couldn't have hoped to sample all of the pales here last year in one day without passing out.

Goober McTuber wrote: Not that many breweries represented there. Does each brewery really only bring one style of beer? At the Great Taste of the Midwest brewfest, each one brings 3-6 different brews. Looks like maybe 8 or 10 pales there. I couldn't have hoped to sample all of the pales here last year in one day without passing out.

the one in Denver, Great American Beer Fest, is like that, too. breweries bring a few of their product....at least that's how it was a couple years ago when i went.

Goober McTuber wrote:Well, this might be too late, since today is the last day, but in honor of Fester you should really try Summit Brewing's Extra Pale Ale.

Late here also, I didn't click on the link 'till just now, but I woulda' recommended Dins sample Boulevard Brewery's (pride of KCMO micro-brews representin'), Belgian Wheat.

If he didn't like it he could exclaim "You have just kicked your own ass"... and then stumbled off cackling hysterically.

War Wagon wrote:

Goober McTuber wrote:Well, this might be too late, since today is the last day, but in honor of Fester you should really try Summit Brewing's Extra Pale Ale.

Late here also, I didn't click on the link 'till just now, but I woulda' recommended Dins sample Boulevard Brewery's (pride of KCMO micro-brews representin'), Belgian Wheat.

If he didn't like it he could exclaim "You have just kicked your own ass"... and then stumbled off cackling hysterically.

It's a wheat beer, Faggot Wagon.

Goober McTuber wrote: It's a wheat beer

So?

War Wagon wrote:

Goober McTuber wrote: It's a wheat beer

So?

Dinsdale has explained many times that people who drink wheat beers are either light in the loafers, or female.

Dinsdale wrote:

I see your boys at Deschutes have come out of the closet and are entering a wheat beer. How special. I'm sure you're very happy for them.

A sad day, really. If they're cranking out fagbrews, they become "Timmay/YD's Boys"... he actually hangs out with those guys.

OH NO YOU DIDN"T

I completely disowned those fukkers when they opened up that tourist(yup I did) trap in the Pearl. Mark them releasing a wheatbrew targeting THEIR PORTLAND customers as the official point of jumpin the shark.

I actually was roped into going to the OG pub last night. Had a Mirror Pond or two and they were $$. The $15 burger left a bitter taste that was amplified by the din of WA and CA tourists marveling on the sw00t nectar.

fuck that place.

two smaller breweries here up and coming Dins. Wildfire, and Silver Moon.

Deece Grog.