So I think it's time we all just put ourselves

[KC Scott]

into the following Catagories. This way there won't be any confusion at all and we could maybe even give you your own private fourms where you could CJ each other to your hearts content.

Right Wing Nutjob: You think the past 8 years with Bush were "Not so bad", Aren't really thrilled with anyone who looks like you, Think global warming is a myth while knowing with absolute certainty that Eve was Maced up by a snake in a garden. Your also pretty likely to think a hot broad with great tits who hunts elk is uniquely qualified to take over POTUS beacuse she can keep an eye on Russia from a pier in Alaska. Your for immediate execution of anybody for anything as soon as the gavel drops, but wouldn't allow an abortion in orderto save the mothers life and wouldn't want one red cent of your tax dollars used to support the sniveling brat. Yopu hate the Dixie chicks but secretly whack off to their album covers. You drive a Made in Mexico Ford and key any Kentucky made Toyota you see. You hate soccer but think Golf is exercise.

Left Wing Whacko You pine for the Camelot era of Bill Clinton and think we could all just get alongif only everyone would just spark one up and not be such a bogart. You know there's a vast conspiracy involving the jews, the vatican, the Group 7, Nato, the Red Cross, the NRA and the SEC (the Football Conference) to listen to our calls, read our e-mail and implant tiny chips in our heads and track you to Michael Moore film fests. Your smarter than everyone you talk to beacuse you've read boooks no one ever heard of. Your all for a candidate who spouts Change but really hasn't made any substantial proposals for change that haven't been thrown out and knocked down previously. Your all for more taxes and more government beacuse you think somehow it's going to either get you free health care, your student loan payed off, or clemency for all your overdue books on tape. You want to hug a whale or a seal or anything else you can get your arms around when you finish selling your stock of wind chimes manufactured by malignant dwarfs listening to Alanis Morisette. You'd drive a vespa if you didn't think the helmet would fuck up the bed head look you worked two hours to perfect.


So now that we've pretty much nailed down which camp the majority of you can fall into, I'd like to see a nice orderly line form behind each.
Thanks in advance for your cooperation.

[.m2]

Big City v. Midwestern Republicans


"Now listen here, there's a whole lotta difference between us Midwestern Republicans and those California big city guys. Us Midwestern Republicans are more hands-on if you know what I mean! Now turn your head and cough, please!"