This one will go straight to the top

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Thu May 21, 2009 8:18 pm

...of my reading list.

Palin picks memoir collaborator
The Associated Press
10:59 a.m. May 21, 2009

NEW YORK — Sarah Palin has picked a collaborator for her memoir.

A spokeswoman for SarahPAC, the Alaska governor's political action committee, says that Palin has selected Lynn Vincent, an author and features editor for World magazine, a conservative Christian publication. Palin's book, currently untitled, is scheduled for release next year by HarperCollins.

Vincent, a San Diego resident, has written or co-written several books, among them "Same Kind of Different As Me," "The Blood of Lambs" and "Donkey Cons: Sex, Crime and Corruption in the Democratic Party."

Pretty sure diogenes will try to come up with an autographed copy, though, and probably sleep with it under his pillow.

Sirfindafold · Post by **Sirfindafold** » Thu May 21, 2009 8:23 pm

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Thu May 21, 2009 8:27 pm

Mikey wrote:...of my reading list.

You can read ?

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Thu May 21, 2009 8:39 pm

Derron wrote:
Mikey wrote:...of my reading list.

You can read ?

You should try it some time. It's amazing the bits of information you can pick up.

Bobby42 · Post by **Bobby42** » Thu May 21, 2009 9:17 pm

McCain: "Where was I?"

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 12:33 am

Mikey wrote:Vincent, a San Diego resident, has written or co-written several books, among them "Same Kind of Different As Me," "The Blood of Lambs" and "Donkey Cons: Sex, Crime and Corruption in the Democratic Party."

I might check this one out...

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri May 22, 2009 1:01 am

Palin wants someone to write her memoirs?

In.

socal · Post by **socal** » Fri May 22, 2009 1:32 am

Diogenes wrote:
I might check this one out...

Fixed.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 1:48 am

I don't know what the fuck that's supposed to mean, but I actually just got back from TJ.

$22 for a carton of Camel Filters and $14 for a liter of Absolut Citron.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Fri May 22, 2009 1:49 am

Mikey wrote:Pretty sure diogenes will try to come up with an autographed copy, though, and probably sleep with it under his pillow.

And by sleep with it under his pillow you mean he'll poke a hole in the cover where her face is and have sex with it.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 2:03 am

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:
Mikey wrote:Pretty sure diogenes will try to come up with an autographed copy, though, and probably sleep with it under his pillow.
And by sleep with it under his pillow you mean he'll poke a hole in the cover where her face is and have sex with it.

^^^^^^^^^

He says after a session stroking his life-sized Obama doll with one hand and his Vienna sausage with the other.

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Fri May 22, 2009 8:00 am

Sarah Palin's 15 minutes was up on November 5th.
Ridiculously humorous that only she fails to realize it.

A desperate GOP prez candidate slapped her onto the ticket in hopes that it would woo some of the thumper sheeple to vote for him.

She was a gimmick, and to some degree, the gimmick strategum worked -- thumper sheeple are generally not the brightest bulbs on the tree.

But obviously the gimmick strategum didn't work well enough.

She's dead, Jim.

She's a walking, talking, zombie.

Only Dio, middle-aged conservative man looking for jerk fodder, and 11 yr old girls looking for female "role models" give half a piss about what Sarah Palin says or looks like.

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri May 22, 2009 8:11 am

Yeah, but at least she's way hotter than Michelle Obama.

-Stuff Magazine, in response to Maxim magazine

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 12:35 pm

poptart wrote:Sarah Palin's 15 minutes was up on November 5th.

Says the guy who voted for Obama.

And yes, not voting is the same as voting for whoever ends up winning.

Loser.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Fri May 22, 2009 2:00 pm

Diogenes wrote:I don't know what the fuck that's supposed to mean, but I actually just got back from TJ.

$22 for a carton of Virginia Slims and $14 for a liter of Cuervo for my Dickilla Cumrises.

Fixed. You're a confirmed homo.

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Fri May 22, 2009 2:10 pm

Oh sure, Dio, I'm right with ya.

And what if someone voted for the guy who came in 5th?
Did he vote for Obama?

How 'bout if someone voted for the guy who came in 3rd?
Did he vote for Obama?

And if someone voted for the guy who came in 2nd?
Did he also vote for Obama?

haha -- laffing not with you

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 2:29 pm

poptart wrote:And what if someone voted for the guy who came in 5th?
Did he vote for Obama?

How 'bout if someone voted for the guy who came in 3rd?
Did he vote for Obama?

And if someone voted for the guy who came in 2nd?
Did he also vote for Obama?

Yes.
Yes.
No.

You're welcome. And enjoy your Obamanation.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 2:31 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:

Still a takeless fucking moron.

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Fri May 22, 2009 2:42 pm

A vote for a 5th place, 3rd place, or 2nd place finisher all accomplished the same thing, Dio.

It was a vote for a losing candidate.

The fact that you decide to place some significance on a vote for the 2nd place candidate will never change the fact that ALL losing votes are just another brick in the same wall.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 3:08 pm

poptart wrote:A vote for a 5th place, 3rd place, or 2nd place finisher all accomplished the same thing, Dio.

It was a vote for a losing candidate.

The fact that you decide to place some significance on a vote for the 2nd place candidate will never change the fact that ALL losing votes are just another brick in the same wall.

Wrong. A vote for a 3-5 candidate in a 2 man race is the same as writing in Lyndon LaRouche or Pat Paulson. Or not voting.

It is an abdication of your duties as a citizen and an aquiescence in whatever the final outcome is.

To quote Heinlein, there isn't always someone to vote for, but there is always someone to vote against.

He's your responsibility and your guy. Deal with it.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 3:39 pm

mvscal wrote:I hope the next four years hurt and have no doubt they will.

Thanks to worthless assclowns like you.

mvscal wrote:You get the government you deserve.

Unfortunately, we're getting the government you deserve.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Fri May 22, 2009 3:44 pm

Diogenes wrote:

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 3:51 pm

mvscal wrote:
Diogenes wrote:
mvscal wrote:I hope the next four years hurt and have no doubt they will.
Thanks to worthless assclowns like you.
I'm pretty simple really.

Too simple.

"Le mieux est l'ennemi du bien".

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 3:54 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:
Diogenes wrote:A lot of stuff going over your head.

:? :? :? :? :? :?

Nothing new here.

Besides, I'm just trying to see how many worthless threads I can hijack.

trev · Post by **trev** » Fri May 22, 2009 4:04 pm

McCain was not my first, second or third choice but he would have been better than BHO. Yeah, it's too bad they put an old moderate fart up against a brand new rock star. Dumb Americans and illegals get what they deserve.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Fri May 22, 2009 4:10 pm

Ms. Palin, my offer still stands.

sin, Larry Flint

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri May 22, 2009 4:12 pm

PSU, I'm tellin' ya' (dig the Palin patois!), you and I should go all Kitty Kelly and write Palin's unauthorized autobiography.

Maybe steamy it up, just a skoosh.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 4:19 pm

Van wrote:PSU, I'm tellin' ya' (dig the Palin patois!), you and I should go all Kitty Kelly and write Palin's unauthorized autobiography.

Maybe steamy it up, just a skoosh.

You punks better be ready for a beatdown-

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Fri May 22, 2009 4:19 pm

Just let me know, Van. I'm standing by with goodies like:

"Sarah took off her glasses, licked them clean of her own fluids, quickly whipped her hair up in that trademark bun, and greedily beckoned toward the next throbbing ICBM."

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri May 22, 2009 4:38 pm

Wearing nuthin' but her flannel nighty, Sarah padded outside. There, while standing on her back porch, she enjoyed her morning cup o' joe as she resolutely saluted the Alaskan sunrise.

She spied a majestic moose, a giant buck, its proud silhouette standing as a symbol of her native state's enduring stength and rugged nobility.

She put down her coffee, picked up a rifle and shot it in the head.

As the steam rose from the gory wound, Sarah's wry grin accompanied her own trickling moistness to truly paint the portrait of the modern frontier maverick...

(edit...)

~denouement~

Late that morning, as Sarah was lying on her living room floor's bearskin rug, she was talking on the phone to smackaholic, who was berating her for calling a boy moose a "buck" rather than the correct term, which is a "bull."

As always, Sarah was getting off on being belittled, and when smackie began to coo to her descriptions of push-rod American V8 engines and the sounds they make...she knew. She knew smackie was the one man who could get her off.

No more would she be referred to as Caribou Barbie, in homage to her usual sexual partners. Finally, it was a man, just a man, who made her think of killing shit.

A real man...not something with antlers.

She curled her thumb into her palm, and with only the slightest grunt she slid the rest of her hand inside her weeping pink igloo.

Lying there, writhing on her back, she noticed for the first time that the support beams in the roof of her log cabin's porch were not stained properly.

"My gosh, even the exposed screws weren't properly treated!" she thought to herself, as her fisted pussy continued to sing its happy aria.

As Sarah reached her crescendo, she cried into the phone, "Oh, fuck, smackie! God, tell me more about fixer upper prices in Connecticut!"

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 5:08 pm

You losers are pathetic. Then again, I can see why braindead lefties would lust after her uncontrollably.

I've seen what your 'females' look like.

Jennete Garafuncallo? Hitlary? Mike Obama? Rachel Maddcow?

Like I needed another reason to vote Republican.

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri May 22, 2009 5:14 pm

Dio, careful there with that broad brush. You can't seriously be lumping me in with the "lefties," just for making Sarah Palin jokes.

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Fri May 22, 2009 5:19 pm

Van wrote:Dio, careful there with that broad brush. You can't seriously be lumping me in with the "lefties," just for making Sarah Palin jokes.

You have to ask?

If it wasn't for broad brush, he wouldn't have no brush at all.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 5:19 pm

Van wrote:Dio, careful there with that broad brush. You can't seriously be lumping me in with the "lefties," just for making Sarah Palin jokes.

It was a general observation.

Hell, the closest I've seen to a hot leftette is Tina Fey-when she's impersonating Palin.

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri May 22, 2009 5:50 pm

Dio, hey, c'mon, as governors go, as VP candidates go, we all gotta admit that Palin was a serious MILF. You gladly would commit serious body fluids spillage on her, if given even nine seconds alone with her in a Tucson airport churro kiosk.

If that winsome bitch let her hair down and shook it out and said, "Dio, you magnificently conservative hunk of Tardinal Fan, paint me...just fuggen paint my beautiful face," you'd be pulling on her ears and maniacally skull fucking her like she was Ben Roethlisberger.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 5:54 pm

Van wrote:Dio, hey, c'mon, as governors go, as VP candidates go, we all gotta admit that Palin was a serious MILF. You gladly would commit serious body fluids spillage on her, if given even nine seconds alone with her in a Tucson airport churro kiosk.

What do you mean 'was'? And more like nine hours.

Terry in Crapchester · Fri May 22, 2009 6:15 pm

Van wrote:Wearing nuthin' but her flannel nighty, Sarah padded outside. There, while standing on her back porch, she enjoyed her morning cup o' joe as she resolutely saluted the Alaskan sunrise.

She spied a majestic moose, a giant buck, its proud silhouette standing as a symbol of her native state's enduring stength and rugged nobility.

She put down her coffee, picked up a rifle and shot it in the head.

As the steam rose from the gory wound, Sarah's wry grin accompanied her own trickling moistness to truly paint the portrait of the modern frontier maverick...

Sorry, Larry Flynt already beat you to the punch. You might want to check out Nailin' Palin.

Diogenes wrote:Hell, the closest I've seen to a hot leftette is Tina Fey-when she's impersonating Palin.

Glad to help you out.

And while we're on the subject of right-wing "hotties" . . .

Separated at birth? You be the judge.

And of course, Mommy Reagan and Barbara Bush speak for themselves.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Fri May 22, 2009 6:21 pm

giant buck?

geejus krist you fukkin' city boys is ignernt.

boy mooses are bulls.

Van · Post by **Van** » Fri May 22, 2009 6:37 pm

True. I'll go back and fix it.

Diogenes · Post by **Diogenes** » Fri May 22, 2009 6:55 pm

Terry in Crapchester wrote:
Diogenes wrote:Hell, the closest I've seen to a hot leftette is Tina Fey-when she's impersonating Palin.

That's okay. She's all yours.