T1B

For the few remaining posters on here that would actually remember this, I've got an update I'm sure you've waited 9 years for!

For those that are unaware of what happened..........somewhere between late 2000 and early 2001 (I know it was my sophomore year of college, I just can't remember exactly when) this chick I had been dating for my entire college years up to that point left me for an assistant manager at McDonald's. She had been fucking him for weeks prior to finally kicking me to the curb. I didn't know this until she finally gave me some BS reason she was leaving me. A few days later I find out it is for him. I mean, I knew it was for someone else. I was guessing 20-30 dudes I thought it could be, but never in a million years did I think it was him. He was just this cat that we knew and were sorta friends with only because he would hook us up with free grub. When you're a college kid, any dude hooking your ass up with free grub is a good dude.

Now, before you get all high and mighty.......we've all had shit like this happen to us. It was not my proudest moment in life, I can assure you of that. You have no idea how embarrassing that shit was. My wife still makes fun of me because of it. That's how much shit I got for it. Deservedly so. I would have given my friends shit if it happened to them. But needless to say, I was in complete shock. This dude was a loser. She was a cute chick that was working on a college degree and had a decent future in front of her. This dude was a high school dropout that worked at McDonald's (he was probably 23-24 at the time) and goofy as fuck.

So here's the update that I'm sure you've waited 9 years or so to hear......

A few years ago I actually heard from her. She heard I was getting married, so she called me up to congratulate me. I hadn't spoken to her in probably 3-4 years. Found out she ended up marrying Ronald McDonald about a year and a half after we broke up. She ended up completely changing......totally fucked up. Doing a lot of drugs, getting into some trouble, etc. She was like 5'8 125 pounds the last I had seen of her until I met up with her a few years back at a bar and she was probably 200 pounds- maybe more. I could barely even recognize her. She had all these ugly ass tattoos and piercings.

Anyways, to make a long story short.........he's got cancer and wants to divorce her because his family doesn't think she is capable of taking care of him. Rack that!

TheJON wrote:She was like 5'8 125 pounds the last I had seen of her until I met up with her a few years back at a bar and she was probably 200 pounds- maybe more. I could barely even recognize her. She had all these ugly ass tattoos and piercings.

that was option a? i'd hate to see what your option b of a wife looks like.

TheJON wrote:So here's the update that I'm sure you've waited 9 years or so to hear......

A few years ago I actually heard from her.

Wait a minute. You heard from her a few years ago and kept us in the dark this whole time? I live and die with your facebook updates, man. I can't believe this shit.

Another reset.

Jon, I don't think your story went over very well here.

Sincerely,

TheJON wrote:Now, before you get all high and mighty.......we've all had shit like this happen to us.

Without being all high and mighty.............not really.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:Wait a minute. You heard from her a few years ago and kept us in the dark this whole time? I live and die with your facebook updates, man. I can't believe this shit.

Someone shitcan this thread.

TheJON wrote:Anyways, to make a long story short.........he's got cancer ......... Rack that!

Yeah, racking cancer is always fresh. How old are you, again?

Terry in Crapchester wrote:

TheJON wrote:Anyways, to make a long story short.........he's got cancer ......... Rack that!

Yeah, racking cancer is always fresh. How old are you, again?

TheJON on 11/7/2010 in my epic Euro bball shitstomp thread wrote:I would probably laugh at this if I was a teenager like most of the posters on this board.

Terry in Crapchester wrote:How old are you, again?

I would go with 29-30, based upon the information disclosed in the post you responded to.

M Club wrote:

TheJON wrote:She was like 5'8 125 pounds the last I had seen of her until I met up with her a few years back at a bar and she was probably 200 pounds- maybe more. I could barely even recognize her. She had all these ugly ass tattoos and piercings.

that was option a? i'd hate to see what your option b of a wife looks like.

You don't understand, she became fucked up after me. I initially fell in love with what I thought she would look like in her 40's cuz her mom had a fucking bangin body. Plus, she worked out a lot. So needless to say, I never expexted her to become a porker.

Screw_Michigan wrote:

Terry in Crapchester wrote:

TheJON wrote:Anyways, to make a long story short.........he's got cancer ......... Rack that!

Yeah, racking cancer is always fresh. How old are you, again?

TheJON on 11/7/2010 in my epic Euro bball shitstomp thread wrote:I would probably laugh at this if I was a teenager like most of the posters on this board.

I was actually more racking the fact that he left her ass after getting cancer because his family thinks she's worthless. I wouldn't ever wish anyone to get cancer, but some people have it coming. Dude was a HS dropout that had multiple run-ins with the law. You expect me to feel bad for somebody like that?

Oh, and I was going to delete this thread if Frisco didn't see it and post the Ryan Hansen photo! I have never seen that Hasselhoff photo before, but good job on that one. It takes me back to my glory years when I was slinging footballs around the University of Iowa campus, helping Team Hasselhoff achieve a Top 5 ranking in U of I flag football intermurals league. Played some tackle ball the other day and I gotta say- the 'ol arms still got it! I don't know if I would say I could still put up a 400 yard game like I did back in college (estimation/nobody really knows how many yards it was since we didn't keep stats) but I bet I could outduel any of those punks on campus right now.

Do you guys realize how depressed I was when I blew out my knee and couldn't finish the 2001 season? it was the worst day of my life. To not be able to be there with my teamates as we took on the mighty Fraternities ranked above us.....it chokes me up just thinking about it. I was broken up about it for minutes. Maybe even a half hour. We had #1 in our sites. We felt we were underrated because we didn't play the year before. The lack of respect we got was effing horsecrap. We beat the preseason #1 team in our opener and weren't even ranked after that. Then we beat the #2 (? Maybe it was #3) team the next game and all we got was a #5 ranking? Sure we lost to a team full of cripples shortly after, but we had an excuse......massive hangovers.

We were going to the playoffs. There was no doubt about it and we were going to win it all. Then I tore up my knee and it was like the Colts losing Peyton Manning, but not really.

Man, what could have been! I'm sorry for going Al Bundy on you guys, but my one shot at glory and I couldn't even get that shot. It doesn't even matter what I do in life after that point, right? Intermural flag football is everything. If I make millions and become famous, who cares? I didn't win a University of Iowa flag football title in 2001. I hope the fridge is stocked with Jack because I need to drink my sorrows away. Can we have a group hug? Screw? Ucant? Club? Let's all hug it out.

So she chose a life of drug addiction and obesity with the assistant manager of the local McDonalds with cancer over theJON? Damn, you can't blame her for choosing a life with the most upside.

Yeah, just think how much she could have learned about coaching 1-A football.

Mace wrote:So she chose a life of drug addiction and obesity with the assistant manager of the local McDonalds with cancer over theJON? Damn, you can't blame her for choosing a life with the most upside.

She chose Netboy Reid over Jon and he doesn't mind advertising it.

BWAAAAAAAAAAA!

TheJON = old school troll that gets responses as far back as the Rome board days under various nics. He got some of you suckered into the discussion. Just a hunch. Next?

Atomic Punk wrote:TheJON = old school troll that gets responses as far back as the Rome board days under various nics. He got some of you suckered into the discussion. Just a hunch. Next?

No, AP, and unfortunately for JON, we're seeing the real deal with all of his douchebaggery and dumbfuckery. I know it's hard to believe he's not a troll, but look on the bright side.....at least you're not theJON. :)

TheJON wrote:I was going to delete this thread...

The next time you find yourself pouring your heart out on a message board at 2 am... do just that.

Get a diary. Imagine how pissed you'll be someday when your innermost interwebs thoughts just go poof and you have nothing to show for all that effort.

hmmm... I guess you could print these pages off and fill a 3-ring binder, but for historical purposes, you don't want your heirs reading that.

Rack Whitey.

Ronald 2
Jon 0

The moral of the story........ women prefer a Big Mac to JON's lil' Sizzler.

Atomic Punk wrote:TheJON = old school troll that gets responses as far back as the Rome board days under various nics. He got some of you suckered into the discussion. Just a hunch. Next?

Shut up and let me continue residing inside of Mace's head.

TheJON wrote:

Atomic Punk wrote:TheJON = old school troll that gets responses as far back as the Rome board days under various nics. He got some of you suckered into the discussion. Just a hunch. Next?

Shut up and let me continue residing inside of Mace's head.

Yeah, you're so firmly implanted in my head that I think I'll call you out in a couple of threads in the CFB Forum. :roll:

For those that are unaware of what happened. My wife still makes fun of me because of it. I would have given my friends shit if it happened to them.You don't understand,Oh, and I was going to delete this thread. It takes me back to my glory hole years, the 'ol arms still got it, but I bet I could out jerk any of those punks on campus right now. Do you guys realize how depressed I was, The lack of respect I got was effing horsecrap.It doesn't even matter what I do in life after that point,

Qualifying statements for a complete fucking douchebag outing himself on the internet as a LOSER !

Suck off a shotgun you fucking troll...