T1B

Another Holliday season is upon us. Good tidings will not be had by all. One group of homos in particular come to mind.

Sorry. No Shake Weights in the stockings this year. The big guy is sickened with you flyover faggots.

Also to Silver Bells.


One Board Pals

Meet board member, beefy member
Fresh from first class air flight
To prepare
Got that plug
Up my dimehole
Footsies brushing
Peehole flushing
Ball that man with my eyes
And within my fat head I still hear

One Board Pals, One Board Pals
It's meet-up time, with Urlacher
Ring-a-ling hear me sing
Soon it will be meet-up day

String of jizz flies
Splat between eyes
Filthy mind has such hope
As we small talk
Drops form from my ass

No gag reflex
During face sex
This is Hero's big scene
And below all this muscle
You'll hear
One Board Pals, One Board Pals
It's meet-up time, with Urlacher
Ring-a-ling, hear me sing
Soon it will be meet-up day

Beantown picked a bad time to show up.

Dancer wrote:No gag reflex
During face sex

Grabbin Dicks, Grabbin Dicks
It's football in Kansas City

Rrrrack.

D-

Dinsdale wrote:D-

O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
Thy last call is apporaching;
O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
Thy last call is apporaching;
We’ll be at my place by 2 AM,
I hope you are down to go ATM.
O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
Thy last call is apporaching!

O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
Much pleasure thou can give me;
O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
Much pleasure thou can give me;
Drunk as fuck, I might just be
Salad tossing a manatee!
O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
Much pleasure thou can give me.

O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
My goggles are deceiving!
O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
My goggles are deceiving!
You lift your skirt, I had to gag,
God Dammit! Another man in drag.
O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
My goggles are deceiving!

O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
I can’t believe I fucked AP!
O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
I can’t believe I fucked AP!
The night ended too typically
Compromised masculinity .
O Tavern Skank! O Tavern Skank!
I can’t believe I fucked AP!

A Tradition Unlike Any Other.

Chestnuts Roasting (KC Style)

Bud Lights toasting over a tire fire
Whitey nipping at your toes
4th grade comebacks doled out by the guys
And folks dressed up in puffy coats

Everybody screams, "I know you are, but what am I?"
It helps to make their game feel tight
Fat slobs, with their gullets all packed high
Won't find it hard to wheeze tonight

They know that ucant's on his way
He's loaded lots of 'guns' and 'hugeness' on his sleigh
And every KC Tard is going to smile
They'll think, will ucant really do doggie style?

And so I'm offering this simple phrase
To Paul and Wags and even Bri
Although it's been said, many times, many ways
I know you are, but what am I?

I thought dancer left the boards years ago

Bizzarofelice wrote:I thought dancer left the boards years ago

These legs dance around in my dreams every night

If a shared troll departs from the board, has it really left us?

Any song about DP hogging gets an automatic A- from me. George Carlin fucking Rumplewife.

Where can a guy get a deer license in here? Do you honor Iowa tags? Just checking. Thanks.

Mace wrote:Where can a guy get a deer license in here? Do you honor Iowa tags? Just checking. Thanks.

Looks like someone stepped up to take KC and AP's place this year.

Dinsdale wrote:D-

A grade? My eyes are above 20/20, but did you really post a grade? What are you going to talk about next? Let me guess. Chalkboards? Erasers? Desks? You can sit there now and think about why you're stupid. See most people who aren't stuck in the dark ages know there's this thing now called analytical persuasion. The U&C has been into it from -- you guessed it, eons ago. Why do you hate progress? You talk about a grade and you may as well be talking about a dirt road. That's weapon's grade-ignorant. It doesn't really take a rocket-surgery level of intelligence to know this thread is not going well for you. Somebody is an idiot right about now. Eject.

Timmy? Timmy?

I be looking for you...

RACK the triumphant return of the reindeer.

rack all raydah jaymz appearances

good to see James hasn't succumbed to HIV yet.

How 'bout them Raiders?

Unlike 'tart posting a retirement thread, you just retired.

Damn... Plato was considerably funnier when I ran it.


Sup, brother James?

Did Slasher get rendered?

Some pedophile in a shithole wrote:Did Slasher get rendered?

He'll be here. He had to help the Boss oversee production on a large order of anatomically correct dolls coming from Seattle PD precincts. You know anything about that you sick fuck? Of course you do. You have caused a shitload of headaches for us folks up north asshole. Because of you, the Boss has had countless kids this year scared to get on his lap and when they finally do, all they want for Christmas is "to make the nightmares stop". How the fuck is he supposed to wrap that request up? It ain't like we can throw that in a Target mailer you baby rapist.

Dinsdale wrote:Damn... Plato was considerably funnier when I ran it.

Dinsdale, tell the rest of the losers here what it's like having 206 funny bones.

Donder wrote:Dinsdale, tell the rest of the losers here what it's like having 206 funny bones.

No, let's have him identify his normal facial expression when he palms himself off to his fantasy of Barbara Walters reading his name off as #1 on her list of Most Fascinating People.

Cupid wrote:

Some pedophile in a shithole wrote:Did Slasher get rendered?

He'll be here. He had to help the Boss oversee production on a large order of anatomically correct dolls coming from Seattle PD precincts. You know anything about that you sick fuck?

No....check with Cuda's travel agent.

Screw_Michigan wrote:

Grabbin Dicks, Grabbin Dicks
It's football in Kansas City

Rrrrack.

Diego in Seattle wrote:Did Slasher get rendered?

That chicken-shit tucked his white tail and deleted his posts and avatar after I blasted him with a Sling Blade reference.

I Saw ucant Kissing KC Scott

I saw ucant kissing KC Scott
Underneath the Chiefs logo last night.
Scott's bragging of his wealth
And his copies of "Men's Health"
His rock hard pecs were rippling
Before him Scott had knelt.


Then, I saw ucant kissing KC Scott
Underneath his Tap Out shirt hands crept
Oh, what a laugh it would have been
If Paul had only seen
ucant kissing KC Scott, where he slept.

Little Dinsy Boy

Come they told me, pa rum pum pum pum
22,000 posts to see, pa rum pum pum pum
A style that's so verbose, pa rum pum pum pum
It leaves me comatose, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,

So to placate Him, pa rum pum pum pum,
When hit F5.

Little Dinsy, pa rum pum pum pum
I am nodding off, pa rum pum pum pum
I have no good reply, pa rum pum pum pum
To your latest lie, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,

Shall I humor him, pa rum pum pum pum,
I feel so dumb

Getting drowsy, pa rum pum pum pum
Even Mace logged off, pa rum pum pum pum
I tried my best to read, pa rum pum pum pum
It was the worst indeed, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,

Then he claimed his BODE, pa rum pum pum pum
We all were run.

MY REINDEER HAS BEEN HIJACKED, TOO!!!!

That's it. Me and Dins are registering an epic troll situation where we're all different cards. I'll be 4 of clubs. EPIC.

Dinsdale has been reduced to a sad little mess; an unfunny caricature of himself. But if you add a bunch of extra words for emphasis like

"reallyreallyreally"

and a bunch of

spacing

like this;

and throw in a "umm, did I seriously just read that? PLEASE tell me I didn't just read that."

or a

"I've forgotten more than you'll ever know."

topped off with a

"Can't. Stop. Laughing."

Then YOU TOO can go from painfully pedestrian to awesomely hilarious!

Bizzarofelice wrote:MY REINDEER HAS BEEN HIJACKED, TOO!!!!

That's it. Me and Dins are registering an epic troll situation where we're all different cards. I'll be 4 of clubs. EPIC.

Best laugh of the thread.

Cupid wrote:Dinsdale has been reduced to a sad little mess; an unfunny caricature of himself. But if you add a bunch of extra words for emphasis like

"reallyreallyreally"

Just for the record, I was first one to go with that- ME! Only there were several more really's involved. Other than that, yeah.

Also, RACK! Blitzen

Spreadsheet reminds me that Dinsdale lived as an adult male in habitation with another male. We don't need to judge. We don't need to research the hows and whys of that arrangement. Instead, it is perhaps worthwhile to just recognize that such a thing has to play games with the psyche of an individual.

Boys are often made to cohabitate with other males during summer camp, during boy scouts, or maybe even up until year one of college when they are made to live in a dorm room with another male.

Making a willful decision to extend such an arrangement into adulthood however, is a move that is beyond social norm. Is it possible that an inner feeling of inadequacy over choosing to live in such a manner bleeds through into the message posting of said individual?

The board blowhard bravado is our reward for his head-scratching lifestyle choice?

You make the call.

No, seriously dude.

Dinsdale wrote:funnier when I ran it

What's very funny is you running your mouth to the tune of 22,120 posts since the board opened. 10.29 per day. Only women yammer on as prolifically as that. No, seriously dude.

Do a good deed and unplug for a year or four. Let those who've been lapped by inanity have a fighting chance to catch up.

And speaking of something being run.

Maybe take a hint?

Raydah James wrote:

RACK the triumphant return of the reindeer.

I don't believe for a minute that Fruitcake James really posted this. I believe that the admins just occasionally haul out dormant usernames and post with them.

Blitzen wrote:I Saw ucant Kissing KC Scott

I saw ucant kissing KC Scott
Underneath the Chiefs logo last night.
Scott's bragging of his wealth
And his copies of "Men's Health"
His rock hard pecs were rippling
Before him Scott had knelt.


Then, I saw ucant kissing KC Scott
Underneath his Tap Out shirt hands crept
Oh, what a laugh it would have been
If Paul had only seen
ucant kissing KC Scott, where he slept.

Wow, a FAGGOT reindeer....who knew?