T1B

'Guy goes into a bar in Louisiana where there's a robot bartender! The robot says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Whiskey."
The robot brings back his drink and says to the man, "What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "168."
The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration and medical technology.
The guy leaves, . . . but he is curious . . . So he goes back into the bar.
The robot bartender says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Whiskey."
Again, the robot brings the man his drink and says, "What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "100."
The robot then starts to talk about Hunting, Budweiser, the Saints and LSU Tigers.
The guy leaves, but finds it very interesting, so he thinks he will try it one more time. He goes back into the bar.
The robot says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Whiskey," and the robot brings him his whiskey.
The robot then says, "What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "Uh, about 50."
The robot leans in real close and says, "So, . . . you people . . . still happy . . . with Barack Obama???"

Sirfindafold wrote:robot

It was Sunday morning and there was a knock on the door. Bob opened it to find a young, well-dressed man standing there who said, "Hello sir, I'm a Jehovah's Witness." Bob said, "Come in and sit down." Bob then offered him a fresh cup of coffee and asked "What do you want to talk about?" The young man said, "Beats the shit out of me, I've never gotten this far before."

Doctor Murray had sex with one of his patients and felt horribly guilty. No matter how hard he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. His guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But his inner voice tried to console him, telling him, "Hey Murray, don't worry about it. You weren't the first doctor to have sex with one of his patients and you won't be the last. And you're single so let it go." But invariably his other inner voice would bring him back to reality, saying, "But Murray, you're a veterinarian."