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Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 4:39 pm
by MgoBlue-LightSpecial
The Blue Jays are in the playoffs for the first time since '93. A few questions. Do you care? Does the city care? What's the vibe like?

I've only been to Toronto a couple times but my impression is the people there are too cool and cosmopolitan to pay any attention to the Jays or MLB. Image

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 5:00 pm
by Mikey
Toronto - too cool and cosmopolitan?
Love it or Leave It


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Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 5:01 pm
by MgoBlue-LightSpecial
Oh, and happy belated Canadian Thanksgiving, friendo.

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Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 10:01 pm
by Jay in Phoenix
The Canuckleheads sell milk in bags. BAGS!!!

How backward do you think Canadians are, putting gross amounts of liquid in bags?

Umm, err, I have a case of drunks to misrepresent, so aliens exist, they can cross our borders in their tiny, coyote shaped space ships and I'll welcome them in my tiny, litigious arms. The blacker their weird skin, the better I " welcome" them.

It will be an oral exam.

--Moving Salacious

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 10:47 pm
by Dr_Phibes
I've got an angle on it - this is half post, half plea.

Get me the fuck out of here.

Jays fans are like locusts, there's no escaping them. Wherever they've been since '93 there hasn't been much sun, they've all got this weird Baby Huey quality about them. Pale skin, massive pudgy bodies and big pumpkin heads crammed into Jays gear. They don't say much. They drink Coors light and they're always on their own or in a group that don't know each other.

Met a friend at the local last night after the game, you can't get into any bar. I thought it was safe, surely past their bedtime. Nope.
Still milling about, getting quarters from the barmaid for bartop games, watching postgame shows. I asked to have the TV's switched to the Steelers game and this happened

Image

They sort of shuffled into a corner, angrily watched the Dodgers for a few minutes and then left.

I have no explanation for them, I thought it was all baseball fans but I've been to Boston, everyone likes the Red Sox and they all seemed normal. I don't remember Jays fans being like this in the early nineties.

C'mon the Rangers!

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 2:23 am
by War Wagon
Rack Dr. Phibes!

That was hilarious and KC wants nothing to do with Toronto. Nothing. Period.

I went to a game against them this year and they played the Canuckian national anthem.

I mean, they like stopped selling beer while that was happening. I mean, like go play hockey or something

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 2:33 am
by Dr_Phibes
Nothing against the team, they're frikken great, they'll throttle the Rangers and I wouldn't fancy Kansas having a chance. But what's going on isn't healthy. Jays sold 20,000 jerseys in two weeks. I suspect they're all Scarbs (Perkland). Lots and lots of denim.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 3:23 am
by Dinsdale
Dr_Phibes wrote:Lots and lots of denim.
Canadian tuxedos?

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 3:28 am
by Dr_Phibes
A Scarborough suitcase

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Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 10:52 am
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
A Scarborough PET will be forthcoming.

:shock:


sow the wind, reap the whirlwind, fucko's

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 10:53 am
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
Trust me...you do NOT want this...

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 3:57 pm
by MgoBlue-LightSpecial
You didn't answer the questions, numbnuts old buddy, old pal.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 11:45 pm
by mvscal
Phibes'll rack.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 12:12 am
by Dinsdale
Stay classy, Toronto.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 12:16 am
by Jay in Phoenix
Ditto on the rack. Phibes post was Priceless.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 1:23 am
by Dinsdale
Sudden Sam wrote:Did someone hit that woman's baby with a bottle?

I think so.

Phillies fan apparently moved north.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 1:39 am
by MgoBlue-LightSpecial
Rack the Jays. But I'm still pulling for the IKYABWAIs to win it all.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 1:44 am
by Screw_Michigan
Probably the most clutch hit Rios has ever made. He was good for nothing in his time with the White Sox.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 3:00 am
by Go Coogs'
Johnny was on his game tonight and you can tell those young bats of the Astros stopped trying to work counts after KC grabbed the lead. KC has the the more balanced lineup, better bullpen, and the experience. Houston overachieved this season and I'm happy they got the experience. Now, they can go get Heyward and trade for Chapman and that should vault them into elite status for the next 5 years.

Beat those fucking classless Canadians, KC.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 3:15 am
by Dr_Phibes
Go Coogs' wrote: Beat those fucking classless Canadians, KC.
See, you don't get that shite at the ACC. MLSE is is an efficient machine, no-one's so much as spit on the floor there in past two decades, they know how to handle it.

Rogers Centre is starstruck, they haven't got a clue what they're in for. The next few weeks will be great :lol:

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 3:26 am
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
At the Air Canada Centre, the closer you get to the floor, the kinkier the hair gets and the more pronounced the hooked noses are.
It's like The Boys From Brazil...only, instead of cloning Hitler, they're cloning Elliot Gould.

Don't even get me started on the box seats for Leafs games...It's like Birkenau with table service...

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 3:29 am
by Dr_Phibes
The hosers have been priced out of the market. Now there's a venue with a winning team and a 50,000 seat capacity that everyone can kind-of afford :shock:

It's like Orchard Park with no busride and customs check.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 3:38 am
by Dinsdale
Go Coogs' wrote:Houston overachieved this season
WTF are you talking about?

"Overachieved"?

They've had the #1 pick for like the last 40 seasons. I'd say it wasn't a matter of overachieving this season, rather underachieving the last several.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 3:47 am
by Dinsdale
IKYABWAI is popping champagne corks because they won a division series?

Way to lose the next one before it even starts, morons.

So much for "act like you've been there before" and "keep your eye on the prize."

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 5:05 am
by Truman
It's called "tradition", you STD-riddled dickhole. Every team does it. But I could see where such nuance might escape the casual follower of the Portland Trappers or Beavers or Panhandling Meth Addicts or whatever the fuck forgettable name your lame-ass minor league ball club is called in your lame-ass minor league city.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 12:07 pm
by Screw_Michigan
Where's the fucking playoff bunting in these baseball stadiums? Holy fuck, talk about acting like you've been there before.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Thu Oct 15, 2015 1:03 pm
by BSmack
Dr_Phibes wrote:It's like Orchard Park with no busride and customs check.
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Orchard Park, where the upper middle classes go to vomit.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Fri Oct 16, 2015 8:09 am
by Go Coogs'
Dinsdale wrote:
Go Coogs' wrote:Houston overachieved this season
WTF are you talking about?

"Overachieved"?

They've had the #1 pick for like the last 40 seasons. I'd say it wasn't a matter of overachieving this season, rather underachieving the last several.
Brady Aiken didn't sign, Mark Appel is still in the minors, and Correa was not the consensus #1 among scouts and writers, but the Astros chose him over Buxton. Altuve signed as an international undrafted free agent, Springer was the 11th pick in 2011, Keuchel was a 7th rounder in '09, McHugh, Sipp, and Will Harris were picked up off waivers. Gomez, Kazmir, Carter, Gattis, and Valbuena were all acquired via trade with the Astros deep system.

Yes, they've benefited from having the deep system, but they were the worst farm system in 2011 and they have been brilliant with their draft pool money by signing their top picks for underslot and in turn they were able to get guys like McCullers, Nicely, German, Deetz, Tucker, and Cameron at overslot in the later rounds.

They were supposed to be a .500 team this season with mild success next season because their talent was still young and needed seasoning and development.

So to answer your question the Astros overachieved you stupid fuddy-duddy.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Fri Oct 16, 2015 10:01 am
by Dinsdale
So, excuses for not killing it with 57 straight #1 picks?

Alrighty.

Even Billy Bean thinks that's whack.

Re: Hey Shlomo...

Posted: Fri Oct 16, 2015 5:03 pm
by Go Coogs'
Dinsdale wrote:So, excuses for not killing it with 57 straight #1 picks?

Alrighty.

Even Billy Bean thinks that's whack.
It's three, but who's counting?