Page 1 of 1

God's Power

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 3:22 am
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
So, just how tough is God, the god of the Bible? How does he stack up pound for pound against the mightiest of the mighty deities?
Zeus hurls lightning bolts, then descends to Earth to fuck your wife...Odin uses some sort of hammer and does things with goats, I believe...

So the rules are...THERE ARE NO RULES. It's a last-messiah-standing, royal rumble title match. Winner takes all.
Foreign objects, folding chairs, punching below the belt, eye gouging...everything's on the table.

P.S. ~ Satan is the ref





Image

Vote, or I shall smite thee.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 5:11 am
by Rooster
It’s no contest in that there is/are no other Gods or gods other than Yahweh. He is the only one there is. Furthermore, He is the same person that you are splitting into two, that being a Jewish God and a Christian God.

Your theology is a bit rusty, Shlomo.

Second edit: what makes you think He is petty and spiteful?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 5:23 pm
by Dinsdale
Rooster wrote:Furthermore, He is the same person that you are splitting into two, that being a Jewish God and a Christian God.

Your theology is a bit rusty, Shlomo.
Wow. You really went yard... on your own ass.

Badly.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 6:12 pm
by Goober McTuber

Re: God's Power

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 8:03 pm
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
Okay, let's not let this thread slide into blasphemy...

Soft-Tailed Rat, what's your take on this?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 8:19 pm
by Rooster
Dinsdale wrote:
Rooster wrote:Furthermore, He is the same person that you are splitting into two, that being a Jewish God and a Christian God.

Your theology is a bit rusty, Shlomo.
Wow. You really went yard... on your own ass.

Badly.
Ok, I'll bite. How did I kick my own ass?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 10:15 pm
by smackaholic
This one's easy.

Yahweh, the OG of Gods. He was one hard ass son of a bitch. He even nailed his fukking kid to a cross for going all faggoty on him. Dude had to start his own religion from scratch rather than just inherit the old man's business.

Allah is total shit. He's done a fairly decent job as of late of getting over on Yahweh Jr, but we've already established that he's a little light in the sandals. Whenever Allah steps to Yahweh, he gets his shit pushed in.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Mon Jul 09, 2018 10:34 pm
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
Wow. No love for Odin? What does a Norse divine being need to do to get a little respect around here?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 12:09 am
by Softball Bat
I AM


God drown all flesh on the flat earth.

And all flesh died that moved upon the earth... of all that was in the dry land, died.

Genesis 7:21-23







#bode

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 12:37 am
by Left Seater
Wait Shango couldn’t even make the list? No love for Kwanzaa and all?

And what about the Spaghetti Monster?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 2:36 am
by Left Seater
Ahhh, need to update my spreadsheet.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 3:50 am
by Dr_Phibes
As I am not allowed to print the name of my God (his name is not for our tongues), put me down for Zeus. You'd probably have the most fun worshipping him over anyone else. Your Minotaur ruined my labyrinth!

Odin would be shit. He'd have you running around slaughtering village after village which would be hard work because villages have things like guns and police forces.

One vote for the sneaky Greeky.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 4:08 am
by Dr_Phibes
Rooster wrote:Will trade my horrible Jewish God who won't let me shave my beard. I keep tripping over the fukkin thing. I'm not even allowed to groom it. Any offers for clean-shaven Gods appreciated.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 5:12 am
by Rooster
:grin:

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 12:58 pm
by BSmack
Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:Wow. No love for Odin? What does a Norse divine being need to do to get a little respect around here?
Actually have worshipers?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 2:07 pm
by Wolfman
Odin has his day, Wednesday. So does Thor, Tyr, and Frige. Wonder if anyone has taken up the cause of changing names of week days from Nordic Gods?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 6:11 pm
by Dinsdale
Rooster wrote:
Ok, I'll bite. How did I kick my own ass?
So, my atheist ass has to explain the Abrahamic Religions to someone who hits others with "your theology is a bit rusty"?

Did that really just happen?

Hint: You accused him of bifurcating, when in fact he trifurcated.

Crack a fucking book or something.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 7:29 pm
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
Dinsdale wrote:...when in fact he trifurcated.

Sorry 'bout that. I had Indian food the other night... :oops: :oops: :oops:

Re: God's Power

Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 11:50 pm
by Rooster
Dinsdale wrote:
Rooster wrote:
Ok, I'll bite. How did I kick my own ass?
So, my atheist ass has to explain the Abrahamic Religions to someone who hits others with "your theology is a bit rusty"?

Did that really just happen?

Hint: You accused him of bifurcating, when in fact he trifurcated.

Crack a fucking book or something.
Depends on how you read the poll. I saw it as Shlomo differentiating between the Jewish God and the Christian God as being two different entities. You’re reading it as the Christian God as being three persons in the form of the Trinity, when I’d make the claim they are the same, only that the Jews didn’t recognize Jesus as God, despite allusions to His nature and being in various passages in the Old Testament.

Furthermore, to be precise— and hopefully not pedantic —Christian theology holds that the Trinity isn’t bifurcated or even trifurcated, but is one Being with three distinct, separate, and individual people/aspects/original entities.

Strangely enough, I suspect Goobs would agree with me on these points here despite being so incredibly wrong on nearly every other issue.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 12:28 am
by Softball Bat
Christians think they are worshipping the same God as the Jews.

Jews think not.
Jews do not think Jesus is the Christ, hence Jesus is not God, hence the Christians are worshipping a false God.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 1:03 am
by Dinsdale
Rooster wrote:
Depends on how you read the poll.
No, it doesn't. And you decided to double-down on KYOA.

And I even fucking told you why, but apparently, your theology is a little rusty.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 2:50 am
by Rooster
Softball Bat wrote:Christians think they are worshipping the same God as the Jews.

Jews think not.
Jews do not think Jesus is the Christ, hence Jesus is not God, hence the Christians are worshipping a false God.
I disagree. What Jews do not believe is that Jesus was the Messiah, but it is generally accepted that the God of the Pentateuch is the God of the New Testament as worshipped by Christians. It is understood that Yahweh is comprised of the Father, the Spirit, and the Suffering Servant, as written about by Isaiah, who is the descendant of King David.

However, an argument could be made that western Jews like Reformed Jews have given up all hope and thought of the Messiah and have traded their faith for secular acceptance. But that is a discussion for a different thread.

All of this points to what I think is Dinsdale and me talking over each other’s head. We’re using the same terms, but they have different meanings, thus leading him to think that I don’t understand theology.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 3:11 am
by Dinsdale
Rooster wrote:thus leading him to think that I don’t understand theology.
Good God (pun intended), you're fucking ignorant. How slowly do I need to type?

And you've proven that you don't understand theology, and my thoughts have nothing to do with it.

I even mentioned THE FUCKING ABRAHAMIC RELIGIONS... there's three of them that worship the same god, AND ALL FUCKING THREE ARE ON MARTY'S LIST.

So, no, he didn't "split him in two," you ignorant didlo -- he split Yahweh in three. AGAIN -- crack a fucking book sometime.


Figured how how badly you KYOA yet?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 3:28 am
by Softball Bat
Rooster wrote:I disagree. What Jews do not believe is that Jesus was the Messiah, but it is generally accepted that the God of the Pentateuch is the God of the New Testament as worshipped by Christians.
Christians believe Jesus is God.

Jews think that is blasphemy.

Mark 14:62-64
[62] And Jesus said, I am: and ye shall see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power, and coming in the clouds of heaven.
[63] Then the high priest rent his clothes, and saith, What need we any further witnesses?
[64] Ye have heard the blasphemy: what think ye? And they all condemned him to be guilty of death.




Disndale wrote:there's three of them that worship the same god
All three came from the same starting point.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 3:44 am
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
Rooster wrote: However, an argument could be made that western Jews like Reformed Jews have given up all hope and thought of the Messiah and have traded their faith for secular acceptance. But that is a discussion for a different thread.

Look up Sabbatai Zevi.
In the 17th century, Jews decided that the Jewish God was...the Jew...and the Torah was supplanted by the accumulated works that became known as the Talmud.

What the Torah forbids, the Talmud permits.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 5:01 am
by Rooster
Allah is to Yahweh as Mormonism is to Christianity. Dins, you are operating from an incorrect premise.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 5:19 am
by Softball Bat
Dinsdale is sort of on the right track.


He said this...
there's three of them that worship the same god
It is not accurate.


Abraham had two sons that are relevant to this discussion -- Ishmael (the first) and Isaac (the second).

Ishmael became the Arab people -- and Muhammad is a descendant of Ishmael.
Isaac continued the Jews.
Jesus Christ is a descendant of Isaac.


Islam, Judaism and Christianity all have Abraham as a "father."

Re: God's Power

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 12:47 pm
by Goober McTuber
Rooster wrote:Strangely enough, I suspect Goobs would agree with me on these points here despite being so incredibly wrong on nearly every other issue.
If I ever agree with anything you say, I should probably be euthanized.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2018 9:18 am
by LTS TRN 2
Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:
Rooster wrote: However, an argument could be made that western Jews like Reformed Jews have given up all hope and thought of the Messiah and have traded their faith for secular acceptance. But that is a discussion for a different thread.

Look up Sabbatai Zevi.
In the 17th century, Jews decided that the Jewish God was...the Jew...and the Torah was supplanted by the accumulated works that became known as the Talmud.

What the Torah forbids, the Talmud permits.
Yer a punk bitch, period..

You've never had a real take..just a fake... a wannabe..

And yet like a bed bug, you just bite , that's all you can do..

Fuck you...really :wink:

Re: God's Power

Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2018 10:47 am
by Shlomart Ben Yisrael
What is wrong with you?

Re: God's Power

Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2018 12:23 pm
by smackaholic
Odin gets no love, cause he never made it south of Sweden. Well, he did a few OOC pillages back in the day, but not enough to get him any higher in the rankings. He would have been right at home in the SEC.

Re: God's Power

Posted: Thu Jul 12, 2018 5:44 pm
by BSmack
I just spent some time in part of Odin's old hood. They have a message for him.Image