So here is how I am going to end it.
Fuck with the bull, you get the horns, baby.Franko wrote: Jenna,
It looks like I found the answers I was looking for. Sorry I had to be so sneaky, but I wanted to make an informed decision based on the truth. I know you can relate to and respect my sneakiness since you have been nothing but covert since July. On the flip side of that coin, you wouldn’t know the truth if it stuck its big black dick up your twice aborted cunt. Oops, bad example. (sidebar - she went thru her mudshark phase 4 years ago and says she is embarassed by it. She also had 2 abortions...both white guys though.)
Amazing how on December 8th you were ready to get married and have my kids, yet I was supposedly the one always talking about marriage. Oh, that’s right; you were drunk when you said that, so you shouldn’t be held accountable. Fuck you. You have to trust and admire your significant other to have a happy, successful, and lasting relationship, and I have never, and will never, have either for you.
Nice to know December 24 thru January 6 was a complete fraud. I especially love the touch where you invited me down to meet your ENTIRE family. You are one cold bitch. Remember when I banged you like a screen door in a hurricane and you came all over my ten and a half inch cock like a geyser 4 times during that span? And yet you continued your undercover act with another guy the whole time.
During that span, it is also nice to know how you drunk dialed me at 2 a.m., when Sherry and Liz were over at your house, to drop an L-Bomb on me. And you followed that up by sleeping with some dude moments later. Some Texas hillbilly was sleeping shirtless on top of my crusted cum stains when I wasn’t around. Outstanding! That is comedy gold right there. Scoreboard me. Next time you kiss him, ask him how my dick tastes. The correct answer would be HUGE.
Jenna, it’s time to face the facts: with your insecurities, there will ALWAYS be another guy in your world. Sure his name changes from Greg, to Lance, to Derek, to Tom, to Sam, to Gary, to nogs like Marcus and Ron (you didn’t know I knew about big black Ron, did you? How disgusting…your dad must be so proud) to whomever you insist on coming back to your house to do inordinate amounts of cocaine at 2 a.m. - he has a different name every time, but the guy is still the same. It just goes to show that, like many of your girlfriends, you will open up your cock garage for anyone who shows you the slightest bit of interest. Yeah, that is the role model I want my daughter to look up to…(huge fucking rolleyes…)
Have fun in the Caribbean with your fuck buddy from Texas. I’m not sure if he has a girlfriend or not, but if he does, that won’t matter to you. Other people’s feelings never did. Tear that relationship up with your dishonesty and selfishness like you did ours. Fuck her. It’s not your fault she is in the wrong place at the wrong time.
But most of all, I would like to thank you for leading me on and wasting my time. Hopefully, karma will find you real soon with a flaming case of genital herpes…oops, too late. At least I didn’t catch those from you. That would have been the cherry on top of moving back across the country, spending $10,000 and a night in jail, and losing out on two jobs only to protect your …ahem…”honor.” News flash, your honor is about as existent as a fart in the wind. (sidebar - arrested for a bar fight where she said some guy tied to rape her in the bathroom.)
Shhhh… listen very carefully. Do you hear that? No, I’m not talking about your biological clock ticking. (She's 34) I’m talking about the other sound. That is a sigh of relief coming from 90 miles due north. That is the sound one makes when one dodges a proverbial cold sore covered cannonball that would have been this relationship. Here’s to loading up on GlaxoSmithKline stock. (I’ll connect the dots for you Jenna. GlaxoSmithKline is the company that produces Valtrex.)
Jenna - a lying, conniving, selfish, dirty dishrag skank once told me: “Life is too short to drink warm beer.” It looks like she was right. It looks as if I was right as well. Now, pardon me while I set the skunked Pabst Blue Ribbon (i.e. YOU) out on the curb with the rest of the trash.
Now you have the rest of the story. Closure? Definitely.
And *BOOM* goes the dynamite!
Sin,
Franko
Now, what I need to know is if I cc/bcc some of our mutual friends on this email, would I be breaking any laws or risking lawsuits (slander/libel/defamation)? [BillyRayValentine]Is there a lawyer in the house[/BillyRayValentine]
Christ! Where is Dinsdale when you need him?
(With my mom, right Dins? War pre-emptive strikes)
Discuss.
Oot.
