Douchebag, WTF?

Enigmabag · Post by **Enigmabag** » Wed May 02, 2007 1:28 am

i'm back man. i took care of business like you asked. i scouted out shitsburgh and psufan's hood. i know exactly where it should all come down. and I went to boston, fort myers and all the other backwater shit holes you asked me to scout. i've got book on all the assholes one your list that need violent beatdowns.

but what the fuck happened while t-bag and i were rolling? i get back and see you posted a list of your crew, and there is no mention of me and t-bag. what the fuck, douchebag? blood is supposed to be thicker than water. and some of those dudes have issues. i told you a long time ago that stiener hit on me at a graduation party last year. why are you still hanging with that sick fuck? he's an ass-pirate, douchebag. he likes to fuck dudes. say that slowly. STEINER LIKES TO FUCK DUDES. its sick.

dude, this is way past not being cool. there ain't no way me and t-bag are gonna ride cross country with some of the homos you're hanging with. seriously, man. you've got to choose. i don't give a shit about old times and old fights. you've got to decide whether you want the bags to ride as a family, or whether you and your crew of homos are going it alone.

i'm really fucking confused right now. i'll be at the grill, with t-bag, trying to sort it out. don't text message me. i have too look you in the eye. and don't bring that steiner fag.

Rack Fu · Post by **Rack Fu** » Wed May 02, 2007 1:38 am

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Wed May 02, 2007 1:48 am

OATST
(off all these shit trolls)
--just sayin'

RevLimiter · Post by **RevLimiter** » Wed May 02, 2007 1:58 am

Wolfman wrote:OATST
(off all these shit trolls)
--just sayin'

^^^^^^^^^^^

The voice of reason.

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Wed May 02, 2007 2:00 am

fuck off, blimp.

RevLimiter · Post by **RevLimiter** » Wed May 02, 2007 2:02 am

I rest my case.

Douchebag · Post by **Douchebag** » Wed May 02, 2007 2:10 am

what the fuck EVER possessed you to think you were part of The Crew, you fucking worthless shitstain? a LONG ASS time ago I even stated on this very board that i respected your efforts here but that you (and my boy Bace) would only be mere "volunteers" during this tour.

but part of the official Crew you are not, dickbag. do you even udnerstand what goes into being a Crew member? Like the months AND MONTHS of rigorous training and mental turmoil involved? you don't just go to sleep one night dreaming about curbing motherfuckers and suddenly wake up a member of THE CREW - donning puka shells and bright colored polos. NOPE, fuckbag, that is NOT how it works. you gotta EARN your way into the crew, and as far as i'm concerned i don't even know who the fuck you are to even warrant your application.

in short: FUCK OFF and stop WASTING my time fuckhole!

Revlimiter's Torn Anus · Wed May 02, 2007 2:31 am

RevLimiter wrote:I rest my case.

Well, please roll over as it is getting a little stuffy down here and the ABC (assballconnection) is rank.

ElvisMonster · Post by **ElvisMonster** » Wed May 02, 2007 3:19 am

I can't fucking wait until Douchebag thins the fucking herd. Ask not for whom the bell tolls, retards.

Louis Cyphre · Post by **Louis Cyphre** » Wed May 02, 2007 3:32 am

ElvisMonster wrote:I can't fucking wait until Douchebag thins the fucking herd. Ask not for whom the bell tolls, retards.

Holy shit! You still post here?

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Wed May 02, 2007 3:49 am

I fuckin KNEW I saw...that was E-Bag?

Goddammnit

Enigmabag · Post by **Enigmabag** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:04 am

Douchebag wrote:what the fuck EVER possessed you to think you were part of The Crew, you fucking worthless shitstain? a LONG ASS time ago I even stated on this very board that i respected your efforts here but that you (and my boy Bace) would only be mere "volunteers" during this tour.

but part of the official Crew you are not, dickbag. do you even udnerstand what goes into being a Crew member? Like the months AND MONTHS of rigorous training and mental turmoil involved? you don't just go to sleep one night dreaming about curbing motherfuckers and suddenly wake up a member of THE CREW - donning puka shells and bright colored polos. NOPE, fuckbag, that is NOT how it works. you gotta EARN your way into the crew, and as far as i'm concerned i don't even know who the fuck you are to even warrant your application.

in short: FUCK OFF and stop WASTING my time fuckhole!

i'm tired of sticking up for you. and i'm tired of your stupid shit. you fight like a fat girl and the closest thing to pussy youll find on your tour is that CREW of yours. and speaking of crews, i just joined one. you know that windchime guy in california you told me to check out. well, he aint so bad. in fact, he's got a prety good thing going on. lots of parties, with actual girls (something you wouldnlt know abuot). and they wear cool clothes. no more pink shirts and puka shells for me and t-bag. so FUCK YOU, db. you'll probably get your head kicked in this summer, just like last summer at the skate park. and i won't be there this time to drag your sorry ass to the clinic to get your head sewn up.

RevLimiter · Post by **RevLimiter** » Thu May 03, 2007 5:05 am

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Thu May 03, 2007 1:52 pm

FIXED:

Douchebag · Post by **Douchebag** » Thu May 03, 2007 1:57 pm

Enigmabag wrote:i'm tired of sticking up for you. and i'm tired of your stupid shit. you fight like a fat girl and the closest thing to pussy youll find on your tour is that CREW of yours. and speaking of crews, i just joined one. you know that windchime guy in california you told me to check out. well, he aint so bad. in fact, he's got a prety good thing going on. lots of parties, with actual girls (something you wouldnlt know abuot). and they wear cool clothes. no more pink shirts and puka shells for me and t-bag. so FUCK YOU, db. you'll probably get your head kicked in this summer, just like last summer at the skate park. and i won't be there this time to drag your sorry ass to the clinic to get your head sewn up.

i still don't even know who in the fuck you are, asswipe. and you want inclusion into a very select organization? LMAO!

i've never met you. i've never rolled with you. for all i know you could be disguised as one of these worthless rimjobs here trying to set up a fix to meet me and then take me out.

not gonna fucking fall for it, DICK

you are the enemy, Enigmabag, and if I ever see you i will MURDER YOU on the fucking spot. no questions asked

A-Bomb · Post by **A-Bomb** » Thu May 03, 2007 2:53 pm

Wolfman wrote:OATST
(off all these shit trolls)
--just sayin'

Don't just wave to the Angel of Death, go over there and talk to him. See what he has to offer. It has to be more intriguing than your current situation.

Time for another beer.

Just say the word, D, and I'll take care of this felch gargler. It would be a favor to the Pampers wearing old fart. He even reminds me of my grandfather. Maybe I'l let him live until the Price is Right is over.

Stevo · Post by **Stevo** » Thu May 03, 2007 3:03 pm

Don't sweat it, boss. I'm gathering some info on this future grave dweller as we speak.

Oh, we'll be meeting up with Enigmabag real soon. Whether he wants to or not.

You just put a hit on yourself, dicktarget. I hope you realize this.

A-Bomb · Post by **A-Bomb** » Thu May 03, 2007 3:12 pm

Stevo wrote:Don't sweat it, boss. I'm gathering some info on this future grave dweller as we speak.

Oh, we'll be meeting up with Enigmabag real soon. Whether he wants to or not.

You just put a hit on yourself, dicktarget. I hope you realize this.

If we've moved on, I'll just set wolfman' wheelchair on fire and sit back down. Let me know when we're doing this thing.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Thu May 03, 2007 3:22 pm

This crew is nowhere near as entertaining as the reindeer. What would be funny is a for a tag-team smack-off between the reindeer and Douchebag’s Rainbow Warriors.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Thu May 03, 2007 3:24 pm

A-Bomb wrote:
Stevo wrote:Don't sweat it, boss. I'm gathering some info on this future grave dweller as we speak.

Oh, we'll be meeting up with Enigmabag real soon. Whether he wants to or not.

You just put a hit on yourself, dicktarget. I hope you realize this.
If we've moved on, I'll just set wolfman' wheelchair on fire and sit back down. Let me know when we're doing this thing.

Taking time off from surfing for porn in public libraries?

Trollfessor · Post by **Trollfessor** » Thu May 03, 2007 3:28 pm

That tag-team smack-off could be a three way tardbitch-athon just by adding the Alliance.

Think of the possibilities.

Douchebag · Post by **Douchebag** » Thu May 03, 2007 3:46 pm

A-Bomb wrote:If we've moved on, I'll just set wolfman' wheelchair on fire and sit back down. Let me know when we're doing this thing.

don't worry Bomber. you'll get yours with this fuck. SW FLA is very early on the tour schedule. steady your hunger before then by hitting up the local Family Christian Bookstore parking lot and wait for some blue hairs to stroll out. then right before they get to their big shiney buick, jump out from behind and beat them with their colostomy bags and their canes.

A-Bomb · Post by **A-Bomb** » Thu May 03, 2007 3:56 pm

Douchebag wrote:jump out from behind and beat them with their colostomy bags and their canes.

Yeah. Nothing worse than punching an old lady in the gunt and hearing a splat and getting a fistful of Ensurepoo.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:14 pm

Sounds like you tools have finally figured out where you might have a chance of matching up physically. Against 70-year-old women.

Douchebag · Post by **Douchebag** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:21 pm

it isn't about the "challenge". all shapes and sizes of motherfuckers have to pay sometimes.

i don't discriminate based on age, race, body type, or even gender.

if you deserve a beatdown you WILL GET BEAT THE FUCK DOWN.

dat simple.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:31 pm

y'know, douchey, I did a little search from when e-bag first showed up carrying your jock, what there is of it, for you. You were tight, boyz and all.

http://www.theoneboard.com/board/viewto ... highlight=

now, you just kick him to the curb? nice to see that loyalty is right up there with fashion sense on your list of traits held dear.

i think when I have you screaming for mercy, I'll have you apologize to the little fella.

A-Bomb · Post by **A-Bomb** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:43 pm

smackaholic wrote:y'know, douchey, I did a little search from when e-bag first showed up carrying your jock, what there is of it, for you. You were tight, boyz and all.

http://www.theoneboard.com/board/viewto ... highlight=

now, you just kick him to the curb? nice to see that loyalty is right up there with fashion sense on your list of traits held dear.

i think when I have you screaming for mercy, I'll have you apologize to the little fella.

My sides hurt from laughing at these little pukes.

Mercy. I can't stop laughing.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:47 pm

A-Bomb wrote:My sides hurt from laughing at these little pukes.

Mercy. I can't stop laughing.

That's because you're an easily amused little nancyboy. Check out my av for how you're goin down.

Rollins · Post by **Rollins** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:48 pm

BSmack wants you to check him out, Bomber.

Nice.

Revlimiter's Torn Anus · Thu May 03, 2007 4:52 pm

RevLimiter wrote:

We need to have a talk. Stick to soft ice cream, yogurt, and mayo. Oh, and let's ease it up with the pounding from the needle dicks of Dins and Goobs.

Rollins · Post by **Rollins** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:55 pm

mvscal wrote:This is pretty fucked up right here.

Enigmabag idolized you. Ever since he popped the collar on his first pink Izod and snapped on the puka shells, he knew he had found his calling. All he ever wanted to do was finger internet tards for future beatdowns and you ripped that from him.

Let's get one thing straight, DICK.

I finger the internet tards around here for D-Bag.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Thu May 03, 2007 4:57 pm

Rollins wrote:Let's get one thing straight, DICK.

I finger the internet tards around here for D-Bag.

That just reeks of gayness.

Stevo · Post by **Stevo** » Thu May 03, 2007 5:18 pm

mvscal wrote:This is pretty fucked up right here.

Enigmabag idolized you. Ever since he popped the collar on his first pink Izod and snapped on the puka shells, he knew he had found his calling. All he ever wanted to do was finger internet tards for future beatdowns and you ripped that from him. 20 years old and his dreams are shattered and you've forced him to take refuge with carnies. You are a fucking dick, Douchebag.

Look at these ass kissers you've surrounded yourself with. Steiner? Stevo? A-bomb? Who the fuck are these people? They've never worn the uniform. Fuck dude, they aren't even bags. They don't know what it means.

I don't know what happened to you, but you've changed, man. You've changed.

Why is this so hard for you morons to understand? Enigmabag is not part of The Crew. He never was part of The Crew. Douchebag even said such many weeks ago. He just showed up here one day and started supporting Douchebag. Which was great. The D loves respect. He gets off on it even. But this so called Enigmabag took a fatal turn by calling out The D publically, and demanded entrance into The Crew. Uhhh, no. We ain't havin that shit. That's not how it fucking works. That's not how we fucking roll. Douchebag broke no bond with this fuckhole. There never was one to break. Starting to get it yet, dickstains?

Furthermore, there's this other pesky little detail...As I delve more into my research, I'm discovering all the red flags and tell tale signs of this dickweed being a mole. An imposter. Designed to set up Douchebag to take him out. He must be dealt with accordingly.

MuchoBulls · Post by **MuchoBulls** » Thu May 03, 2007 5:35 pm

Stevo wrote:The D loves respect. He gets off on it even.

Thanks for finally admitting that you bend over in front of Douchebag.

Stevo · Post by **Stevo** » Thu May 03, 2007 5:35 pm

Umm, do I look like a fatass to you, idiot? A-Bomb works at Subway and hooks me up with free subs all the time. They keep me in good shape. Like that Jared fuck.

God, don't you slappys get tired of looking like a bunch of damn FOOLS?

Jay in Phoenix · Post by **Jay in Phoenix** » Thu May 03, 2007 5:40 pm

Stevo wrote:Umm, do I look like a fatass to you, idiot? A-Bomb works at Subway and hooks me up with free subs all the time. They keep me in good shape. Like that Jared fuck.

God, don't you slappys get tired of looking like a bunch of damn FOOLS?

Speaking of which Stevo...I'm sure you haven't recovered from this yet:

There's more where that came from shit-eater.

Jay in Phoenix · Post by **Jay in Phoenix** » Thu May 03, 2007 5:44 pm

A-Bomb wrote:Yeah. Nothing worse than punching an old lady in the gunt and hearing a splat and getting a fistful of Ensurepoo.

"Gunt?" Did A-Bomb just drop a gunt ref? Now what stupid, balding, pasty pale, sunken chested, fat, alcoholic piece of fucking shit from the U&L likes to use that word?

Ponderous.

Or not.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Thu May 03, 2007 5:50 pm

Jay in Phoenix wrote:Now what stupid, balding, pasty pale, sunken chested, fat, alcoholic piece of fucking shit from the U&L likes to use that word?

I've seen many a poster drop the "g" word. Good to see your troll sleuthing skills rival your Photoshop wizardry.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Thu May 03, 2007 6:06 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:
Jay in Phoenix wrote:Now what stupid, balding, pasty pale, sunken chested, fat, alcoholic piece of fucking shit from the U&L likes to use that word?

I've seen many a poster drop the "g" word. Good to see your troll sleuthing skills rival your Photoshop wizardry.

No shit. Besides, Dinsdale has his hands full with the Root beer troll. The only one I know for sure is smackaholic is Enigmabag.

And Mgo is Franko.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Thu May 03, 2007 6:14 pm

Jay in Phoenix wrote:
A-Bomb wrote:Yeah. Nothing worse than punching an old lady in the gunt and hearing a splat and getting a fistful of Ensurepoo.

"Gunt?" Did A-Bomb just drop a gunt ref? Now what stupid, balding, pasty pale, sunken chested, fat, alcoholic piece of fucking shit from the U&L likes to use that word?

Derron = A-bomb?

I'll have to update my spreadsheet after this revelation.

T1B

Douchebag, WTF?

Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?

Re: Douchebag, WTF?