Little Piggy Murders Majestic Hog

LTS TRN 2 · Post by **LTS TRN 2** » Sun May 27, 2007 9:32 pm

http://www.monsterpig.com/

In a galling display of America's decadence, an 11-year-old butterball toddles into the woods armed with a hand-cannon, assisted by his gloating dad and his obese buddies, somehow locates the King Boar, and shoots him eight times, then trails him for a few miles and finally executes him.

If the kid and his family--or village--were hungry and in need of food, this might be an amazing feat. But, he's a fatty, his gun probably cost two-grand, and the hog was probably much more intelligent in a variety of ways.

Today, as we bear memorials in our honoring of the fallen, let us raise a glass to the hooved King who was so dishonorably slain.

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Sun May 27, 2007 9:43 pm

SG's Son · Post by **SG's Son** » Sun May 27, 2007 10:33 pm

rack.

Rich Fader · Post by **Rich Fader** » Mon May 28, 2007 4:01 am

I'm sorry...it's just a shame to let that much good eatin' go to waste.

WAR carnitas for everybody

RadioFan · Post by **RadioFan** » Mon May 28, 2007 6:00 am

Hell yes, Rich.

Reminds me of the Memphis in May World Championshp Barbecue Cooking Contest. Saw a documentary on it on the Food Network about a week ago. That beast glass dicked by our resident psycho would make one hell of an entry in the whole hog category.

RedHerring · Post by **RedHerring** » Mon May 28, 2007 6:52 am

Holy Shit Rosie O'Fatdyke just quit the view, and she's gunned down a couple days later?! A crying shame.. Good shot kid!!

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Mon May 28, 2007 4:14 pm

Can you say "Glass Dick"?

viewtopic.php?t=23519

RadioFan · Post by **RadioFan** » Mon May 28, 2007 5:20 pm

'swat I said, Mikey.

Happy Memorial Day, btw. Got any big cookout plans today? We've got some steaks and mushrooms, but I can't make them today because my gf has to work 'till about 11 p.m.

I'm toying with trying something different. I have chicken breasts and a ton of basic side ingredients. Any suggestions?

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Mon May 28, 2007 5:27 pm

RadioFan wrote:I'm toying with trying something different. I have chicken breasts and a ton of basic side ingredients. Any suggestions?

I'd suggest going with a chicken breast entree.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Mon May 28, 2007 8:07 pm

RadioFan wrote:'swat I said, Mikey.

Happy Memorial Day, btw. Got any big cookout plans today? We've got some steaks and mushrooms, but I can't make them today because my gf has to work 'till about 11 p.m.

I'm toying with trying something different. I have chicken breasts and a ton of basic side ingredients. Any suggestions?

Passed right over your GD proclamation.

Happy Memorial Day to you too, and everybody else

Just finished the morning yard work, and I'm about to jump in the pool to cool off. The OL is picking up Grampa and I'm gonna stoke up the smoker on which I shall sanctify a couple of sides of spare ribs. Should be good.

For the chicken breasts, if they're boneless try marinating for a couple of hours in Italian dressing and then grilling them. For "complete" chicken breasteses I sometimes season with Scott's Santa Maria Tri Tip Seasoning and then grilling indirect for about 50 - 60 min.

http://www.scottsfoodproducts.com/seaso ... aMaria.htm

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue May 29, 2007 4:21 pm

mvscal wrote:
Rich Fader wrote:I'm sorry...it's just a shame to let that much good eatin' go to waste.
It isn't going to waste.

Yes, it sounds like it’s all being made into sausage. Because something that big has to be on the older side, and older means tougher. I would have cut out the tenderloins, however. Motherfuckers must have been as big as dinner plates.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Tue May 29, 2007 4:50 pm

mvscal wrote:Gotta love these PETA faggots melting over this animal like it's some kind of rare or endangered species.

With no mention how it's not indigenous to the region, and probably poses a major threat to many native species.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue May 29, 2007 5:55 pm

Jsc810 wrote:By the way, you idiots who complain about this obviously have no clue. Hogs are varmits, they destroy crops and property. I promise you the land owner was delighted to have that nasty animal gone.

I thought I read it was shot on a game preserve? In that case, the landowner was happy simply for the publicity. Doubt that he's raising many crops there.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue May 29, 2007 7:34 pm

mvscal wrote: WAR bacon

Why, there must've been enough for every Muslim insurgent in Iraq to have his own slab clenched between his teeth during his next suicide bombing, and that's a lot of bacon.

Carson · Post by **Carson** » Tue May 29, 2007 7:40 pm

Feral hogs are the South's version of city rats: overpopulated, dirty and eating up the food supply.

They attack on sight, also. Especially ponytailed hippies out in their herb gardens.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue May 29, 2007 7:51 pm

I saw a show on feral hogs a couple of months ago on Discovery Channel or some similar network. The majority of feral hogs are domestic hogs that escaped, and their subsequent offspring. Also, I think they said that it only takes about 8 weeks for an escaped domestic hog to go completely wild, tusks and all.

In Wisconsin, they are always in season. 365 days a year. No bag limit. I've never seen one.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Tue May 29, 2007 7:58 pm

Carson wrote:Feral hogs are the South's version of city rats: overpopulated, dirty and eating up the food supply.

This should be in the "Regional English" thread.

Here in the U&L, we refer to them as "Mexicans."

KC Scott · Post by **KC Scott** » Wed May 30, 2007 1:30 am

Carson wrote:
They attack on sight, also. Especially ponytailed hippies out in their herb gardens.

doh!

Sin,

Mikey

Paul's Tattered Asshole · Wed May 30, 2007 3:01 am

Goober McTuber wrote:I saw a show on feral hogs a couple of months ago on Discovery Channel or some similar network. The majority of feral hogs are domestic hogs that escaped, and their subsequent offspring. Also, I think they said that it only takes about 8 weeks for an escaped domestic hog to go completely wild, tusks and all.

In Wisconsin, they are always in season. 365 days a year. No bag limit. I've never seen one.

Look in the mirror.

Living in Wisconsin and watching the Discovery Channel. Quite the life ya got there, homo.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Wed May 30, 2007 4:18 am

Paul's Tattered Asshole wrote:
Goober McTuber wrote:I saw a show on feral hogs a couple of months ago on Discovery Channel or some similar network. The majority of feral hogs are domestic hogs that escaped, and their subsequent offspring. Also, I think they said that it only takes about 8 weeks for an escaped domestic hog to go completely wild, tusks and all.

In Wisconsin, they are always in season. 365 days a year. No bag limit. I've never seen one.
Look in the mirror.

Living in Wisconsin and watching the Discovery Channel. Quite the life ya got there, homo.

As opposed to living in KC and sucking off homeless men ('sup Kaley?), I'll take it.

Mister Bushice · Post by **Mister Bushice** » Wed May 30, 2007 5:42 am

Carson wrote:Feral hogs are the South's version of city rats: overpopulated, dirty and eating up the food supply.

They attack on sight, also. Especially ponytailed hippies out in their herb gardens.

Feral hogs are a problem in several places out here.

Couple of years back I was camping at Lake Nacimiento on the central coast, and about midnight, this family of wild pigs rolled into camp to scavenge. The next morning we woke up to see this 400 pound male trying to open our cooler. He failed, but moved on to some idiot fishermens campsite who had left their shit unsecured, and he trashed their camp. They were loud assholes the night before, so fuck em.

A few hours later the camp dude who over sees the place drove by, so I asked him about the pigs. He said they become a problem every few months, but the animal protection wackos won't let them be killed, so they have to capture them and ship back out to the wilderness, only to have them wander back in a few months later and the cycle starts again.

I asked him why no one just went out and hunted them for food. He laughed and told me this story of when a couple of local hunters tried just that. They killed this big boar, brought him home, and cut him open only to find that the meat was BLUE.

Apparently, during their foraging he had managed to break into a storage site for porta potties.

Ang · Post by **Ang** » Wed May 30, 2007 6:14 am

Feral hogs are a problem here as well, what with the 400 lb. males scavenging in coolers and the uncontrolled breeding. But the flooding and tornadoes in the trailer parks keep down the population to a managable degree.

LTS TRN 2 · Post by **LTS TRN 2** » Wed May 30, 2007 7:14 am

Jsc810 wrote: Hogs are varmits, they destroy crops and property. I promise you the land owner was delighted to have that nasty animal gone.

Whose "property"? What "land owner"?

You aren't getting it.

Some butterball Christer brat with a gigantic handgun is the operative image of decadence and disgust.

The great hog is eternal and beautiful in its supreme indifference to some pale fat chimpanzee spin-off's claims of "property," as well as the specious and insane religious edict to attack and dominate nature.

Wake the fuck up!

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Wed May 30, 2007 12:06 pm

You go ahead and worship your supreme hog. I’ll have mine with a side of sweet potaters.

Stick to the political forum, you fucking whack-job.

The Whistle Is Screaming · Wed May 30, 2007 2:53 pm

R-Jack wrote:
LTS TRN 2 wrote:
Jsc810 wrote: Hogs are varmits, they destroy crops and property. I promise you the land owner was delighted to have that nasty animal gone.
Whose "property"? What "land owner"?

You aren't getting it.

Some butterball Christer brat with a gigantic handgun is the operative image of decadence and disgust.

The great hog is eternal and beautiful in its supreme indifference to some pale fat chimpanzee spin-off's claims of "property," as well as the specious and insane religious edict to attack and dominate nature.

Wake the fuck up!
Mr. Frisco, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever read. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone on this board is now dumber for having read it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

And you expected one? My turn to throw a chuckle your way R-Jack.

Headhunter · Post by **Headhunter** » Wed May 30, 2007 3:06 pm

The Whistle Is Screaming wrote:My turn to throw a chuckle your way R-Jack.

Phffft. O' Doyle rules!

The Whistle Is Screaming · Wed May 30, 2007 3:12 pm

Headhunter wrote: Phffft. O' Doyle rules!

Werd!

Sin,
Giant Penguin

Paul's Tattered Asshole · Wed May 30, 2007 5:10 pm

Using his trademark IKYABWAI smack, Goober McTubesmoker wrote:
Paul's Tattered Asshole wrote:
Goober McTuber wrote:I saw a show on feral hogs a couple of months ago on Discovery Channel or some similar network. The majority of feral hogs are domestic hogs that escaped, and their subsequent offspring. Also, I think they said that it only takes about 8 weeks for an escaped domestic hog to go completely wild, tusks and all.

In Wisconsin, they are always in season. 365 days a year. No bag limit. I've never seen one.
Look in the mirror.

Living in Wisconsin and watching the Discovery Channel. Quite the life ya got there, homo.

As opposed to living in KC and sucking off homeless men ('sup Kaley?), I'll take it.

Nice going, Shitbag! Why are you never more than 30 minutes "behind" a post from Paul's Anus?

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Wed May 30, 2007 5:28 pm

KC Kaley wishing he were Paul's Tattered Asshole wrote:
Once again pounding on the transparent KC tard, Goober McTuber wrote:
Paul's Tattered Asshole wrote: Look in the mirror.

Living in Wisconsin and watching the Discovery Channel. Quite the life ya got there, homo.

As opposed to living in KC and sucking off homeless men ('sup Kaley?), I'll take it.
Nice going, Shitbag! Why are you never more than 30 minutes "behind" a post from Paul's Anus?

It was an hour and 17 minutes, cum-breath. Is that some kind of special Kansas City math?

Why do you like to fanatasize about being another man's poop-chute? Do you picture yet another dick entering your "mouth", or do you just like the smell of shit?

LTS TRN 2 · Post by **LTS TRN 2** » Thu May 31, 2007 2:16 am

R-Jack wrote:
Mr. Frisco, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever read. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone on this board is now dumber for having read it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

My statement is obviously not rambling. It may appear incoherent to you--because you're walking around in a coal mine, as it were, of extremely low, processed consciousness. You have no points to award. And your "God" is a vile fiction. The butterball Christer brat with the gigantic handgun is a malignant product of a diseased culture. The hog, on the other hand, is a truly amazing entity--far more intelligent than you (or Whistler), no bullshit--and the shallow annoyance at a hog acting like a hog, i.e., rooting and eating--is typically infantile and clueless.

Wakey Wake

Rich Fader · Post by **Rich Fader** » Thu May 31, 2007 2:37 am

I still say that if God did not mean for us to eat pig, then why did He make it out of meat?

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Thu May 31, 2007 2:39 am

Ang wrote:Feral hogs are a problem here as well, what with the 400 lb. males scavenging in coolers and the uncontrolled breeding. But the flooding and tornadoes in the trailer parks keep down the population to a managable degree.

Rack!!!

Carson · Post by **Carson** » Thu May 31, 2007 2:48 am

Ask a rabbi just how amazing an entity a pig is.

...or are you an Anti-Semite?

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Thu May 31, 2007 3:01 am

BSmack wrote:
Ang wrote:Feral hogs are a problem here as well, what with the 400 lb. males scavenging in coolers and the uncontrolled breeding. But the flooding and tornadoes in the trailer parks keep down the population to a managable degree.
Rack!!!

Damn. I missed that the first time. Who knew Ang, our angel, our Angela, could run smack?

Rack, sister. I didn't know you had it in you and wasn't looking for that hidden gem.

Rack Bri for catching it and alerting my failure to recognize.

RadioFan · Post by **RadioFan** » Fri Jun 01, 2007 5:50 am

War Wagon wrote:Rack, sister. I didn't know you had it in you and wasn't looking for that hidden gem.

Yep, Ang is one of the most underrated posters here.

Sadly, there have been far too few tornadoes to take out the proper number of feral hogs this year. Al Gore needs to get busy.

LTS TRN 2 · Post by **LTS TRN 2** » Fri Jun 01, 2007 7:03 am

R-jack, you really don't get it.

Billy Graham paying an emotional visit to the Creation Park in Florida, gently--with a mounting sob--reminding any yahoo who will listen (like you) that the dinosaurs existed side by side with humans....

and you'll presume to condescend to a 1,060-lb feral hog?

Nishlord · Post by **Nishlord** » Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:59 pm

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Fri Jun 01, 2007 2:24 pm

Nice link, you cum-drunk limey manwhore. Try this one:

http://www.astrobio.net/stinkyjournalism/

LTS TRN 2 · Post by **LTS TRN 2** » Fri Jun 01, 2007 7:34 pm

Nice. And no surprise the butterball Christer and his hog-dad are total liars. It goes with the territory.

Now, let's turn that same investigative zeal into exposing the vile lies and machinations of Rove and AIPAC.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Fri Jun 01, 2007 7:53 pm

Al Gore needs to get busy.

nice...

T1B

Little Piggy Murders Majestic Hog

Little Piggy Murders Majestic Hog

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