Au revio- Aufwieders-...aw, screw it...Later

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue May 27, 2008 2:39 pm

R-Jack wrote:Hey, OC Zoloft,

I know you like retired and all, but it seems that you didn't get the memo out to all of your personalities. You guys need to have better communication with yourself.

It seems underneath the tough exterior of a really pitiful smacker, there lies an actual chickenshit pussy pulling his hair out in clumps while curled up in the fetal position.

I'm sure in your weak mental state, the grind of reading post after post of people not saying nice things about you would send you over the edge and render you as useful as a piece of produce.

BTW, that one time we met, your sister wanted to fuck me.

Just. Fucking. Brutal.

Note to self: Nominate R-Jack as T1B representative in next internecine Board smackoff, allow extra wide berth in meantime.

Cuda · Post by **Cuda** » Tue May 27, 2008 2:50 pm

ChargerMike wrote:

You're having psyche problems because of a brokern neck?

I wasn't joking about the self-administered electroshock. Don't go for the 240v dryer outlet at the beginning, though. And a car battery probably wouldn't be enough unless you hooked up jumper cables and held on while you put the ends together. Unless you have a volunteer to knock the cables out of your hands with a stick after a minute or so, you might just want to go with the socket of a common table lamp.

RumpleForeskin · Post by **RumpleForeskin** » Tue May 27, 2008 2:57 pm

Damn.

Never knew we were dealing with one of Cybil's offspring here at T1b. Seriously, I'm glad Mike is getting his shit together, but I really don't have much pitty for people who claim to have mental disorders.

What the fuck makes you so special that you can be a failure in life and postulate 'kookieness' as being the culprit?

Fucking man up and take responsibility for being a loser (sup Paul).

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Tue May 27, 2008 3:09 pm

War Wagon wrote:Just. Fucking. Brutal.

No shit. This pretty much reinforces my decision to keep ALL mental, medical, dental, and other personal info as far away from the board (and R-Jack) as possible.

Jay in Phoenix · Post by **Jay in Phoenix** » Tue May 27, 2008 3:42 pm

Well this thread is certainly a mixed bag.

I cannot fathom why R-Jack enjoys chewing on tin-foil..err, hates OCMike so much, but what the fuck, it is a brutal smack-board and some folk just like to hate for no good reason.

For one, I have almost always gotten a laugh or an entertaining read from Mike. Love or hate his humpday challenges, they made for a good time filler. Take care of yourself OC. Whether a true board retirement or simply a sabbatical like the rest of us take from time to time, props and peace bro.

See you in the margins.

Jay

jiminphilly · Post by **jiminphilly** » Tue May 27, 2008 4:23 pm

later.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Tue May 27, 2008 4:40 pm

See you tomorrow, Mike.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue May 27, 2008 6:24 pm

Martyred wrote:I can't say I've ever read an OCmike post.

Were they any good?

Any one of them would easily surpass the grand sum of your 4,000+.

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Tue May 27, 2008 6:48 pm

RumpleForeskin wrote:but I really don't have much pitty for people who claim to have mental disorders.

you only wish you had mental illness as an excuse for marrying your fat hoss of a wife. you are one shit-eating dumbfuck.

RumpleForeskin · Post by **RumpleForeskin** » Tue May 27, 2008 6:51 pm

Screw_Michigan wrote:you only wish you had mental illness as an excuse for marrying your fat hoss of a wife. you are one shit-eating dumbfuck.

Okay, so marrying the woman I fell in love with makes me a dumbfuck. Nice try, fuckstain.

Go tongue a Steve Winwood poster, would ya.

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Tue May 27, 2008 6:55 pm

i find it extremely ironic that a man who finds a 400 pound woman sexually attractive has the nerve to look down upon those with a mental illness. if anything, you're the definition, tard.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Tue May 27, 2008 6:57 pm

Screw Michigan, and Screw Mt. Rumplewife - which would prove the more...ah...insurmountable task?

RumpleForeskin · Post by **RumpleForeskin** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:01 pm

Screw_Michigan wrote:i find it extremely ironic that a man who finds a 400 pound woman sexually attractive has the nerve to look down upon those with a mental illness. if anything, you're the definition, tard.

You're reaching here, dipshit.

Seriously, what constitutes calling me out as the mentally ill one for marrying someone with a degree, a successful career, sound morals and ethics, and a square head on their shoulders?

You are stupid. Very stupid.

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:03 pm

RumpleForeskin wrote:and a square head on their shoulders?

I bet there's a lot of screwing on the deck at the Rumplehouse.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:08 pm

Whatever screws hold the deck together under that monumental coupling - THOSE are the ones you want,

be damned.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:13 pm

RumpleForeskin wrote: Seriously, what constitutes calling me out as the mentally ill one for marrying someone with a degree, a successful career, sound morals and ethics, and a square head on their shoulders?

Rumps, just tell us that she was your high school sweetheart and that she didn't inflate like the Goodyear blimp until years after you married her. Tell us what a hot ass cheer leader she was before becoming addicted to helium.

We'll believe you, seriously.

RumpleForeskin · Post by **RumpleForeskin** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:21 pm

Wags, what if I just tell you the truth. I have ALWAYS had an attraction for big-boned chicks. No shame in that...at least from where I am standing.

Sure, in high school and in college I had my fair share of some skinny hotties. Fuck, I was at a speech tournament my senior year of high school and this hawt cheerleader from another school approached me and asked for my digits. I didn't do anything to lead her on; she just wanted me...can't really explain it. I ended up fucking the shit out of her in her backyard on her younger brother's trampoline. She was a 10 out of 10.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:24 pm

I'm starting to make sense of all this.

After boinking the hottie on the trampoline, you set out to find a girl who wouldn't bounce around so much amidst the throes of coitus...right?

RumpleForeskin · Post by **RumpleForeskin** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:28 pm

mvscal wrote:I laughed.

Why?

I'm kinda hot.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:37 pm

RumpleForeskin wrote:Wags, what if I just tell you the truth. I have ALWAYS had an attraction for big-boned chicks. No shame in that...at least from where I am standing.

Hey, whatever floats your boat. Far be it from me to judge. As long as you're satisfied, that's all that matters, right?

Fat chicks need luvin' too, and give plenty back, I'm sure.

Risa · Post by **Risa** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:39 pm

^^^ damn straight. get over here. [/scorpion]

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:42 pm

GAAAAAA.....

later

pron · Post by **pron** » Tue May 27, 2008 7:55 pm

Risa wrote:^^^ damn straight. get over here. [/scorpion]

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue May 27, 2008 8:20 pm

RumpleForeskin wrote:
mvscal wrote:I laughed.
Why?

I'm kinda hot.

Right. That would explain how you were able to land Rumplewife (there's a "We're going to need a bigger boat" reset in there somewhere).

Oh wait, I get it. You’re in Houston and it’s like 95° today. So you're kinda hot.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Tue May 27, 2008 8:22 pm

Are you guys done titillating Annie in here? There are less weighty matters demanding our attention.

RumpleForeskin · Post by **RumpleForeskin** » Tue May 27, 2008 8:27 pm

No, I mean I am a good looking fellow.

Friday night, Mrs. Rumps and I were playing drinking games with another couple and this guy's sisters. The 19 year old sister wanted me to plant my log into her repeatedly. She was definitely giving me the sex eye and was rather flirtacious.

I know you're not familiar with these types of events, but this sort of thing happens to good looking guys like myself.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Tue May 27, 2008 8:30 pm

She just had a vague impression that you'd like to copulate maybe once without cracking your pelvis. Sounds like a caring individual.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Tue May 27, 2008 8:32 pm

Wait a sec...you're bragging about all the hot chicks you could get with, yet you're bedding a scandinavian cruise ship? Something doesn't add up.

Cuda · Post by **Cuda** » Tue May 27, 2008 8:33 pm

PSUFAN wrote: titillating Annie .

Just... stop it-

sin, Python

RumpleForeskin · Post by **RumpleForeskin** » Tue May 27, 2008 8:35 pm

Wait a second....what the hell does this have to do with Mike's mental illness?

I see what y'all are trying to do now.

Mister Bushice · Post by **Mister Bushice** » Tue May 27, 2008 8:51 pm

RumpleForeskin wrote:The 19 year old sister wanted me to plant my log into her repeatedly.

Don't get reality confused with the voices you hear in your head.

She was definitely giving me the sex eye and was rather flirtacious.

A friend of mine in college had that same problem. A girl he "sort of knew from class" would walk by him and smile and say "Hi", and he'd make the magic leap from a polite greeting in passing right to "She wants to bang me bad" I NEVER once saw any of those encounters turn out that way for him.

Of course in your case, it's quite possible she just feels bad that you have to tote around that bag of flour and a gps backtracking unit when you go hunting for the wifes glory hole. Maybe she thought if you had a little cyber mercy fuck with someone whose pussy and face are visible at the same time from up close without having to do the gunt blubber lift and hand held mirror trick would make you feel like a real man again.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Tue May 27, 2008 9:06 pm

the gunt blubber lift

Sordid, and effective. RACK

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Tue May 27, 2008 11:07 pm

Goober McTuber wrote:
Martyred wrote:I can't say I've ever read an OCmike post.

Were they any good?
Any one of them would easily surpass the grand sum of your 4,000+.

Hyperbole.

Risa · Post by **Risa** » Tue May 27, 2008 11:55 pm

pron wrote:
Risa wrote:^^^ damn straight. get over here. [/scorpion]

Men who love women are loveable men. But what makes a woman?

PSUFan, there are no dicks in this thread, except of the metaphorical persuasion. so, alas, no titillation for Annie.

Mister Bushice · Post by **Mister Bushice** » Wed May 28, 2008 12:56 am

After this thread, the internet nearly snapped in two from the shock wave of all the dicks that veered out of your path.

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Wed May 28, 2008 12:58 am

Hyperbole.

Ya think? I sure hope so.

Terry in Crapchester · Wed May 28, 2008 4:08 am

PSUFAN wrote:Whatever screws hold the deck together under that monumental coupling - THOSE are the ones you want, be damned.

Rumor has it that they come from the planet Krypton.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Thu May 29, 2008 12:55 am

PSUFAN wrote:
the gunt blubber lift
Sordid, and effective. RACK

by itself, not so much, but, throw in the hand held mirror trick and it's :bode:

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Fri May 30, 2008 8:54 pm

This thread has actually done a little to renew my faith in this board.

OCD pretty much put on a board-bitch clinic, and was brutally piled-on and plungered as a parting gift.

Dude pretty much solified his credentials for making the Bitch Hall of Fame on the first ballot.

RACK RJack making OC's final act on this board (until he unretires to whine again) one of being claimed as another's prison bitch.

Rack Fu · Post by **Rack Fu** » Sat May 31, 2008 1:08 am

RumpleForeskin wrote:Fuck, I was at a speech tournament my senior year of high school and this hawt cheerleader from another school approached me and asked for my digits.

Nothing gets a cheerleader all wet like a stud from the high school speech team. What happened??? Did every guy from the football, basketball, baseball, soccer, track, golf, wrestling, tennis and swim teams die leaving the girls to choose from only the speech team, the chess club and the A/V club?