Grand Slam of Golf - Plenty of Good Seats Still Available

[War Stoops]

Well, the golf Gods continue their streak of shitting on fans at major championships. The last six majors, we were cock-teased and almost saw the following winners.

2008 British Open - Greg Norman
2008 PGA - Sergio Garcia
2009 Masters - Kenny Perry
2009 US Open - Phil Mickelson...or...David Duval
2009 British Open - Tom Watson
2009 PGA - Tiger Woods

We could have had the Shark slaying his old demons, Sergio shedding "the label", Perry capping off an unbelievable 18 months, Phil winning one for his cancer-stricken wife, Duval coming back from the dead, Tom fucking Watson, and the greatest-of-all-time. Instead we get Paddy, fucking Paddy again, Cabrerra, Glover, Cink, and Yang. Wow, what a bore-fest. Way to ruin what could have been one of the best runs in golf history, you cruel omnipotent bastards. Enjoy the Grand Slam of Golf. I bet TNT is giving away ad space for that pile of shit for $0.25 and a can of Spam.

[War Stoops]

Well, I clearly broke the comandment of thou shall not drink and post. Not sure it deserved a "go fuck yourself" but whatever. Your take actually made my post look like a well thought-out piece of literature. Who cares who wins? Only every sports fan on planet earth. That's what it's all about, asshole. Besides, what I was talking about was great stories...events that we remember all our lives. Greg Norman winning a major after years in obscurity, Kenny Perry (one of the great guys in the sport) winning a green jacket in his late 40s, Phil winning with his wife in the hospital, Watson pulling off the greatest achievement in sports history. These are the types of outcomes that become immortal ala Nicklaus in '86, Watson at Pebble, and Palmer at Cherry Hills. Even a win by Sergio, who I don't like either, would have been great for the game.

We just happen to be in the middle of a long streak where we almost had several great stories in a row but ended up with anticlamactic endings. No disrespect intended to the winners...now that I'm sober. Underdog winners are usually great. These guys (Cabrerra, Glover, Cink, Yang, etc.) are milquetoast.

I probably deserve a little smack for my random rant but fuck you anyway.

[MuchoBulls]

and the greatest-of-all-time.

Nicklaus wasn't playing in any of those Tournaments.

[War Stoops]

Screw_Michigan:

OK, I'll give you Yang as a "good-for-the-sport" win, especially when you consider the impact on Asian golf. But Tiger's march to 18 is always a great story. Sergio may be a whiny prick, but he's an interesting figure and someone who brings eyballs to television sets. That's really my main point...the guys that are winning these things just bore me to death. So, I got drunk and cursed the golfing Gods for giving me major-championship blue balls.

Now don't forget to Tivo the Grand Slam. I can't wait to see the Neilsen Ratings for that one.

Oh, and fuck you. :)