Reindeer, gather 'round, for tonight we rejoice

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:03 am

Raise your flagon of ale high, mighty reindeer
all around us, nothing but desolation
shattered anuses
spurting compound fractures
chaffed vaginas
bruised egos (Dins)
and the muffled whimpers of those with freshly trodden hoofprints on their domes

Certified Holiday Trolls™, every one of us
swayed not by the furies of tards, web-whores and fatties
Our antlers cresting the night sky, piercing upwards to the heavens
below us nothing but salted earth, never to yield fruit, only despair

so toss a tampon to the bleeding, wretched victims
as they shall one day wipe away their tears, as cock has been wiped on drapes in the past

tonight

is our night

for tomorrow night..........

WE RIDE!

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:06 am

What Santa Tracker should I use?

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:08 am

I'm shaking with fear.

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:10 am

Katy wrote:I'm shaking with fear.

Pour yourself another Long Island Ice Tea you cunt

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:11 am

Blitzen wrote:
Katy wrote:I'm shaking with fear.
Pour yourself another Long Island Ice Tea you cunt

I will if you find another website to steal unfunny smack from. Deal?

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:16 am

Katy wrote:
Blitzen wrote:
Katy wrote:I'm shaking with fear.
Pour yourself another Long Island Ice Tea you cunt
I will if you find another website to steal unfunny smack from. Deal?

fuck off

Tom In VA · Post by **Tom In VA** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:25 am

They gonna pitch a wang dang doodle all night long.

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:31 am

Tom In VA wrote:

They gonna pitch a wang dang doodle all night long.

Smackeychan would really like that song but I think he's busy babysitting his half-eggplant grandchild while the alleged parent is off cutting baby laxatives into the heroin

No one is sacred motherfuckers

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:31 am

suck a cock all night long

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:42 am

I should prolly consider myself fortunate I made it this far into the season before incurring reindeer wrath, misguided though it may be. But like I've said, facts have never been been terribly important 'round these parts.

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 3:51 am

Smackie Chan wrote:I should prolly consider myself fortunate I made it this far into the season before incurring reindeer wrath, misguided though it may be. But like I've said, facts have never been been terribly important 'round these parts.

Fuck those fury fucksticks... if we band together we can feast on Santa's personal meat sleigh pullers tomorrow evening.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 4:15 am

Blitzen wrote:
fuck off

Damn, dude, you really told me.

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 6:23 am

Thank God only one more day of this tardom. I've seen better smack at .net. In fact, I've seen better smack dusting Brittany Murphy's meat locker over the past few days than these deer have brought. Try selling this shit on the smack market and you'd end up like RtS - a tired broken down mess. Here, though, the hangers-on that be applaud this sleigh wreck. But, they also applaud retreaded trailer trash smack, too.

Merry Christmas!!

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 6:35 am

JMak wrote:Thank God only one more day of this tardom. I've seen better smack at .net. In fact, I've seen better smack dusting Brittany Murphy's meat locker over the past few days than these deer have brought. Try selling this shit on the smack market and you'd end up like RtS - a tired broken down mess. Here, though, the hangers-on that be applaud this sleigh wreck. But, they also applaud retreaded trailer trash smack, too.

Merry Christmas!!

Yeah, because a JMak post is what everybody clamors for when seeking funny and original.

Look, we know your kind, your pompous assbag. You got dissed by the deer, so you carry a grudge. Had you avoided our wrath, you'd be lapping our sacks like Diego on a hairless coinpurse at a Tylenol PM cub scout sleepover.

Plato · Post by **Plato** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 6:49 am

JMak has joined Dioqueen and Katyic as a "funnay" judge??

bwaaaa...

Shit you just can't make up.

"psst...

Hey, Wonder, Stevie...

What say you judge my next fight card?"

- Don King

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 6:51 am

Can we get the old handlers to these trolls back when they were entertaining back?

Plato · Post by **Plato** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 6:54 am

Shouldhaveleftsooner wrote:Can we get the old handlers to these trolls back when they were entertaining back?

English R U.

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 6:55 am

Well, they certainly aren't seeking your cumtasticness, jizzstache. In fact, you're rein of felching this season has inspired quite the pile-on onto the deer. In years past posters looked forward to y'all. This year you've managed to get half the board going rodeo on your asses and calling you tards out. Props.

I know, how about another c and p retreaded christmas carole about a poster's balls, anus, or twat...whooops, you deer have run that parade 14 times already. Kinda like your real nics have had trains run on them the prior 12 months.

Maybe you run the "you suck" line about 18 more times between tonight and tomorrow...well, you'll need as much time to accomplish that as it took Van to dismiss yet another SC scandal. So shoot for multiples of 18 like Heath Ledger shot blow and off yourselves in 24 hours.

Happy New Year, cunts.

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:00 am

The deer determining who qualifies as appropriate judges of the funney is about as serious as yet another Obama pledge to get tougher with Iran. It just aint serious. In fact, it's pathetic. And just like the Iranians laughing at Obama, the crowd here at T1B is laughing in the face of the deer. Just like the Chinese not inviting Obama to a climate change meeting we won't be inviting you tardeer back next season. Hopefully you'll handle it better than our ever-serious President who cried like a reindeer having lost his pretty little holly-berry necklace.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:03 am

JMak...do me a favor.

Link me to just a single post on the entire history of this board's documented material in which you were racked, or even casually propped, for something you said that was funny.

Just one. That's all I ask.

Once you inevitably find NOTHING...then ask yourself this - are you really qualified to judge the funnay?

Take your time, dumbfuck.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:04 am

Plato wrote:JMak has joined Dioqueen and Katyic as a "funnay" judge??

bwaaaa...

Shit you just can't make up.

"psst...

Hey, Wonder, Stevie...

What say you judge my next fight card?"

- Don King

Yeah, we get it. Everyone sucks and you're superior to us.

Can the reindeer manage to say anything other than "you suck?"

Fuck. The original handlers must be long gone from these boards.

At least Vixen managed to lay one on me, as have Cupid and Dasher. The rest need a mercy killing.

Plato · Post by **Plato** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:09 am

JMak wrote:you're rein of felching this season has inspired quite the pile-on onto the deer.

Link?

"you're

LMAO

I know, I know...

Pretty tough to weed out the Limbaugh typos when you're being fisted 6 different ways.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:12 am

Well, they certainly aren't seeking your cumtasticness, jizzstache. In fact, you're rein of felching this season has inspired quite the pile-on onto the deer.

First off...

Secondly...Oh, really?

Best ending ever to a carol.

RACK THE REINDEER!!!

Fuck yeah - they're back. :D

Bwaha.

Jesus, I didn't realize just how much I missed these guys.

Reindeer rule.

Yea - Good shit

did the reindeer hire a ghost writer? I never remember them being this good.

baaahahaha

HA!

RACK the annual return of the reindeer.

jezis, bwahahahahaha!

~tears~

Outstanding.

RACK

The Reindeer are on FIRE this year. :D

That right there was one of the most effective song parodies ever.

One fuckuva strong showing this year by the Blessed Reindeer.

And that's just a sampling. But really, all this from a guy whose signature "beatdown" consists of "LMAO! Dolt!" Seriously, just sit down and shut the fuck up.

Donder · Post by **Donder** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:12 am

Katyic wrote:Yeah, we get it. Everyone sucks and you're superior to us.

We're superior, true.

Not everyone sucks.

Look at who's getting baked by us.

Those people suck.

You made the cut, darling.

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:13 am

Nope, you can't divert from your sucktitude by telling me that I aint funny. In fact, it's clear I've scored a direct hit and you're hooves up right now, deer-in-headlights. Good luck limping off the side of the road and I and the rest of those squaring off with you drive right by.

BTW, telling me I suck via your deer troll is rather Irie Cuda-like. What? Your real nic too fucking important to give up by propping up this doe?

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:15 am

So now we know that the shit deer are being run by a single poster who's keeping a spreadsheet score on who's pimping him. That's rich.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:17 am

Donder wrote:
Katyic wrote:Yeah, we get it. Everyone sucks and you're superior to us.
We're superior, true.

Not everyone sucks.

Look at who's getting baked by us.

Those people suck.

You made the cut, darling.

Just so we're clear, morons, none of you are baking me.

My cage can't be rattled.

I'm one of those unfortunate souls that lacks the "caring about what others think" chip.

You should try it sometime.

This smack you think you're laying has been laid and laid way better than this drivel you're passing off.

Sayen.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:18 am

JMak wrote:So now we know that the shit deer are being run by a single poster who's keeping a spreadsheet score on who's pimping him. That's rich.

Gets it.

The days of the reindeer glory are long over.

Same ole, same ole here.

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:18 am

What's most funny right now is that the poster running these is keeping a running score at home...copying and pasting comments racking/propping the other deer and then trying to claim those racks/props for himself...far funnier than the shit deer in this thread.

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:20 am

Cupid wrote:And that's just a sampling. Seriously, just sit down and shut the fuck up.

Most of those appear to be excitement at deer's anticipated return... as yet there have been but four or five truly funnay heat seekers fired off from the reindeer salvo. Some of the parodies have been slightly humorous but as yet this year's showing has been overall a dismal failure.

You have 24 hours to come correct... make it happen you cloven hooved whores or I'm spiking the roof with loose nails at sunset.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:21 am

JMak wrote:What's most funny right now is that the poster running these is keeping a running score at home...copying and pasting comments racking/propping the other deer and then trying to claim those racks/props for himself...far funnier than the shit deer in this thread.

Whose running who? I criticize them and they come in one by one to try and prove themselves smack legends.

Yeah, but I'm being baked. HA!

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:23 am

SunCoastSooner wrote:
Cupid wrote:And that's just a sampling. Seriously, just sit down and shut the fuck up.
Most of those appear to be excitement at deer's anticipated return... as yet there have been but four or five truly funnay heat seekers fired off from the reindeer salvo. Some of the parodies have been slightly humorous but as yet this year's showing has been overall a dismal failure.

You have 24 hours to come correct... make it happen you cloven hooved whores or I'm spiking the roof with loose nails at sunset.

Next year the passwords need to be circulated to those who can manage to use material that's not from a Seinfeld episode.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:26 am

Link me to just a single post on the entire history of this board's documented material in which you were racked, or even casually propped, for something you said that was funny.

What's that? Hello? That's what I thought.

Again...

Look, we know your kind, your pompous assbag. You got dissed by the deer, so you carry a grudge.

Starting to notice any trends here? Yeah, you idiots aren't taking this personally or anything.

See ya next year, you humorless fucks.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:27 am

Sounds like the deer are more hurt by the general consensus of the serge of suck they brought this year.

The truth fucking hurts, doesn't it?

See ya next year, asshole. I don't see it working out any better for you.

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:30 am

Well, cupid and plato went straight to grammar smack when pressed by little ole me...who are the grammar smack queens here...PSU and his eliminated shotholery, maybe? I wouldn't be surprised if he ran spreadsheets.

But wgafa? They're propping themselves so they can "link" to their supposed awesomeness when they feel compelled to reply to what they I'd as a shit poster like me.

Why reply in the first place to little ole me if I suck so badly?

Answer: because they feel heat and thinking sticking their fingers in all of the holes will slow the bleeding.

SunCoastSooner · Post by **SunCoastSooner** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:31 am

JMak wrote:Well, cupid and plato went straight to grammar smack when pressed by little ole me...who are the grammar smack queens here...PSU and his eliminated shotholery, maybe? I wouldn't be surprised if he ran spreadsheets.

But wgafa? They're propping themselves so they can "link" to their supposed awesomeness when they feel compelled to reply to what they I'd as a shit poster like me.

Why reply in the first place to little ole me if I suck so badly?

Answer: because they feel heat and thinking sticking their fingers in all of the holes will slow the bleeding.

My $$$ is on Ucunt based on the grammar police call outs and writing style.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:36 am

If a post is funny, I rack it. But nobody can seriously say that anything Blitzen laid down this year was remotely funny. It was painful to watch as that troll under it's former handler used to be good.

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:37 am

I don't maintain spreadsheets tracking when I was propped or racked. I certainly don't take credit for the props someone else has earned like you do. Get over it...you suck this year. That is evidenced by two things - a) you're furiously replying to me; and b) all you have is retreaded bullshit about cocks, ass, and jizz. Oh the occassional cunt is considered but you're just trying to cover your tracks, queer. Talking about pussy as though you've seen any in the past two decades is about as credible as toolios Cal takes. They rate as high as Van's unending excuses for SC losing to Stanford.

JMak · Post by **JMak** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:38 am

Just have to watch who comes in tomorrow racking the deer in this thread and the others...it'll be clear.

Katy · Post by **Katy** » Thu Dec 24, 2009 7:41 am

JMak wrote:I don't maintain spreadsheets tracking when I was propped or racked. I certainly don't take credit for the props someone else has earned like you do. Get over it...you suck this year. That is evidenced by two things - a) you're furiously replying to me; and b) all you have is retreaded bullshit about cocks, ass, and jizz. Oh the occassional cunt is considered but you're just trying to cover your tracks, queer. Talking about pussy as though you've seen any in the past two decades is about as credible as toolios Cal takes. They rate as high as Van's unending excuses for SC losing to Stanford.

The theme this year was "you suck" and "homoerotica."

It just shows some of the handlers are more content grinding their axes with certain posters under shit troll nics rather than as themselves. Pretty weak if you ask me.

What happened to the days of the reindeer taking fair aim at anyone, anything, and everybody?