Questions for poptart

[Smackie Chan]

'tart,

You've mentioned on more than one occasion that you believe in a literal Satan. This raises a few questions I hope you may be able to address. From my admittedly limited knowledge, Satan is a "fallen" angel. Does the fact that he has fallen (can he get back up?) deprive him of any of the characteristics unfallen angels have? I really know little about angels in general. Are they immortal? Are there any special ways to kill one should someone want to? Do angels have hearts? I mean, a silver bullet is needed to take down a werewolf, and a stake through the heart can spell a vampire's demise, but what about angels, and specifically Satan?

I ask because I read this article. Of course, I realize MMA, 'shrooms, and Christianity were never meant to go together, but dude was apparently trying to kill Satan by ripping out his heart. Is that an effective means of killing him, assuming he has a heart?

I'm guessing your reply will be chock full of "I don't know," but I figured it would be worth asking anyway. Does the Official Book of Christian Mythology and Folklore address this? Thanks.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Uhhh, yeah...MMA simpletons and psychedelic drugs? Not a good combo.

[Van]

Plus they're from the U&L. Del Norte...Crescent City...Klamath?

Them be some serious methnecks.

[poptart]

Hey Smackie.

I've been OUT for a couple of days.
Barely have time right now to just look at the board, and I saw your thread here.

Still very busy and it might be another day before I can give you the response you deserve.

But I'll definitely get to it when I have the chance.

[Terry in Crapchester]

a literal Satan

You rang?

Sin,

[poptart]

Smackie, I'll answer your questions in the order you asked them.

1. Does the fact that he (satan) has fallen (can he get back up?) deprive him of any of the characteristics unfallen angels have?

He can't get back up.
The fallen angels (demons, of which satan is the leader) are kept in chains by God and wait for His judgement with NO chance for salvation - 2 Peter 2:4 and Jude 6
I'm not sure that I can accurately cite specific characteristics angels have that demons don't, but there are many portions of Scripture showing us the tremedous power angels have in carrying out God's will and working on behalf of the believers.
By the name of Jesus Christ, the believer binds satan activities - I don't know that an angel can be bound in any way by a person.


2. Are they (angels) immortal?

Luke 20:36 (and other places) indicate that they are immortal.



3. Are there any special ways to kill one should someone want to?

Hebrews 1:14
Are they (angels) not all ministering spirits, sent forth to minister for them who shall be heirs of salvation?

They are spiritual beings.
Overwhelmingly, Scripture shows angels working in the spiritual realm.
There are some instances where they have manifested themselves into physical form, but I see no reason to think that they could be killed.


4. Do angels have hearts?

Same as above.
They are spiritual beings.


5. and specifically Satan (is there a way to kill satan)

Scripture shows us that God will cast satan into the lake of fire where he will be tormented forever - Revelation 20:10
This will be fulfilled.
No man will kill satan.


6. Is that an effective means of killing him (ripping his heart out), assuming he has a heart?

It's not.
Sadly, the guy was wack and he was also tripped out.

[R-Jack]

"My client was trying to silence the devil,"

[Smackie Chan]

Smackie, I'll answer your questions in the order you asked them.

Thanks for your respectful and comprehensive response.

[Ponyboy]

I reckon Johnny is with the angles now. Shoot, I don't know what happens when you die. All I know is that it's hard to think of Johnny without a heart after he saved those kids in the church.

[Screw_Michigan]

Rack Rickey Gervais.

[Dinsdale]

Is it true that Satan looks like this, or is that just in the movies?

[Van]

a literal Satan

You rang?

Sin,

It never dawned on me just how much he looks like/reminds me of TVO.

Coincidence? I think not.

[Van]

He can't get back up.
The fallen angels (demons, of which satan is the leader) are kept in chains by God and wait for His judgement with NO chance for salvation - 2 Peter 2:4 and Jude 6

If Satan and his fallen angel minions are kept in chains by God, then how does Satan manage to get loose and wreak so much havoc on mankind?

What, is God's jail like Stalag 13, and he's Sergeant Schultz?

[R-Jack]

It never dawned on me just how much he looks like/reminds me of TVO.

Coincidence? I think not.

The big difference is if Cheney tries to fingerbang a dyke, he could end up in jail.

[Smackie Chan]

The fallen angels (demons, of which satan is the leader) are kept in chains by God and wait for His judgement with NO chance for salvation - 2 Peter 2:4 and Jude 6

Wait...isn't this contradictory? If it's already been determined that there's no chance for salvation, hasn't judgment already been passed? What exactly, then, are they waiting for? And isn't a chained demon a subdued demon? Doesn't that render them harmless? How can Satan and his gang of demons be in bondage and still be the source of evil in this world? Is the definition of hell trying to solve this conundrum?

[Van]

The fallen angels (demons, of which satan is the leader) are kept in chains by God and wait for His judgement with NO chance for salvation - 2 Peter 2:4 and Jude 6

Wait...isn't this contradictory? If it's already been determined that there's no chance for salvation, hasn't judgment already been passed? What exactly, then, are they waiting for? And isn't a chained demon a subdued demon? Doesn't that render them harmless? How can Satan and his gang of demons be in bondage and still be the source of evil in this world? Is the definition of hell trying to solve this conundrum?

Quit bogarting my sarcasm.

If Satan and his fallen angel minions are kept in chains by God, then how does Satan manage to get loose and wreak so much havoc on mankind?

What, is God's jail like Stalag 13, and he's Sergeant Schultz?

Fucker.

:)

[PSUFAN]

It never dawned on me just how much he looks like/reminds me of TVO.

Coincidence? I think not.

The big difference is if Cheney tries to fingerbang a dyke, he could end up in jail.

I guess it all depends on how hard up his daughter is...judging from her looks, ...

[poptart]

If Satan and his fallen angel minions are kept in chains by God, then how does Satan manage to get loose and wreak so much havoc on mankind?

Smackie has basically asked the same question, so here is my reply for both of you.

The final thing Jesus said to His disciples is this:

Matthew 28:18
And Jesus came and spake unto them, saying, All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth.


There is other such Scripture, but Matthew 10:1, Matthew 12:29, and Luke 10:17 can be referenced to show that that the evil spirits are bound by the name of Jesus Christ when used by the believer.

Luke 10:17
And the seventy (believers) returned again with joy, saying, Lord, even the devils are subject unto us through thy name.


Satan and his demons may wreak havoc on people so long as the name of Jesus Christ is not in used by the believer.
At that Name, the demons activity is fully bound.

If it's already been determined that there's no chance for salvation (for satan and his demons), hasn't judgment already been passed?

One might look at that this way:

A boy has royally fucked up at home and his mom has sent him to his room -- to wait for dad to come home.
He's stuck in his room and although dad's "judgement" has not officially come yet, he knows a very solid @ss whippin' awaits him.

[Van]

Okay, so what will dad's punishment be for that lil' devil, beyond the eternal damnation he's already been given?

Also, if merely speaking Christ's name is like a kick save and a beauty to any satanic slapshot, then why don't exorcisms always work, and why does Dins still get laid on occasion?

[M Club]

A boy has royally fucked up at home and his mom has sent him to his room -- to wait for dad to come home.
He's stuck in his room and although dad's "judgement" has not officially come yet, he knows a very solid @ss whippin' awaits him.

yet it's a given he's just going to step out for a few regardless to fuck with the neighbors, though if they whisper 'dad' he'll drop the tantrum and retreat back to his room?

[Tom In VA]

At the 3:43 mark it's pretty clear what's going on here.

[poptart]

Okay, so what will dad's punishment be for that lil' devil, beyond the eternal damnation he's already been given?

He will be cast into the lake of fire where he will be tormented forever - Revelation 20:10

Also, if merely speaking Christ's name is like a kick save and a beauty to any satanic slapshot, then why don't exorcisms always work?

One thing to make note of, first, is that people generally associate the work of demons with something very dramatic - an exorcism, etc.
But the reality is that the work of demons is extensive and it is the reason why people (in "everday" life) are afflicted in SO many ways.

Among others, this is a good piece of Scripture.

Acts 10:38
How God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Ghost and with power: who went about doing good, and healing all that were oppressed of the devil; for God was with him.


To answer your question, read Mark 9:14-29 if you'd like to - regarding Jesus driving a demon out of a guy who was severely mentally (and physically) afflicted.
An "exorcism," if you wish.

From this Scripture, we see the following things.

v. 19 and again v. 23-24 Jesus stressed the need for faith.

For a "work" to take place, a believer must actually ... believe ... in the name of Jesus Christ.

Then in v. 29 Jesus says this this:

And he said unto them, This kind (kind of demon) can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting.

Apparently, some demons are so "strong" that it requires a believer to be in fasting and prayer before such a work of driving the demon out will work.

[Smackie Chan]

Wow. The more detailed the biblical explanations get, the easier it is to believe in Thor & Odin. That is some crazy fantasy world that's been created. While I don't have a high regard for most of what is passed off as average human intelligence, it's still mind-boggling that so-called rational people can continue to believe this hokum. No disrespect, but again...wow.

[Tom In VA]

Wow. The more detailed

The devil is in the details.

[Smackie Chan]

The devil is in the details.

So the details reside in the spiritual realm?

[Tom In VA]

So the details reside in the spiritual realm?

Well, now that you mention it. The temporal realm is finite.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

My biggest issue with God is that his consequences for non believers are so far beyond the realm of brutal or severe...they're downright sick and demented. Seriously, thrown into fire for eternity? Tha fuck is that shit? He couldn't just lock you in a cell with a television playing How I Met Your Mother on a loop for all eternity? Just think...if poptah died and rose from his Kimchi-stinking flat tomorrow, ascended into the sky, and told a bunch of dudes to tell all of humanity that unless they worship him they're going to burn for all eternity...we'd be calling him a sick fuck, and would think of Hitler as Mother Theresa by comparison.

This God dude needs some hardcore therapy.

[Tom In VA]

My biggest issue with God is that his consequences for non believers are so far beyond the realm of brutal or severe...they're downright sick and demented. Seriously, thrown into fire for eternity? Tha fuck is that shit? He couldn't just lock you in a cell with a television playing How I Met Your Mother on a loop for all eternity? Just think...if poptah died and rose from his Kimchi-stinking flat tomorrow, ascended into the sky, and told a bunch of dudes to tell all of humanity that unless they worship him they're going to burn for all eternity...we'd be calling him a sick fuck, and would think of Hitler as Mother Theresa by comparison.

This God dude needs some hardcore therapy.

If God does in fact exist, I think you've made Him very concerned about His status and position in the universe. Of all the personification of God I've read, that one is truly remarkable and cutting.

I think I'm going to re-evaluate my position on things and see which wins out. God vs. Mgo's Personification of God.

I'm in your corner Mgo, I believe in you. Take God on and work this thing out. Be sure to come back and tell the truth about how it works out though.

TIA.

[Goober McTuber]

My biggest issue with God is that his consequences for non believers are so far beyond the realm of brutal or severe...they're downright sick and demented. Seriously, thrown into fire for eternity? Tha fuck is that shit? He couldn't just lock you in a cell with a television playing How I Met Your Mother on a loop for all eternity? Just think...if poptah died and rose from his Kimchi-stinking flat tomorrow, ascended into the sky, and told a bunch of dudes to tell all of humanity that unless they worship him they're going to burn for all eternity...we'd be calling him a sick fuck, and would think of Hitler as Mother Theresa by comparison.

This God dude needs some hardcore therapy.

If God does in fact exist, I think you've made Him very concerned about His status and position in the universe. Of all the personification of God I've read, that one is truly remarkable and cutting.

I think I'm going to re-evaluate my position on things and see which wins out. God vs. Mgo's Personification of God.

I'm in your corner Mgo, I believe in you. Take God on and work this thing out. Be sure to come back and tell the truth about how it works out though.

TIA.

Depends on the terms of engagement. If it’s like a Smack-off, my money’s on Magoo. I’ve read the Bible, and when it comes to God’s smack, he’s a lot like shutyomouth. He’ll threaten to kick your ass or claim he’s already kicked your ass, but you’re not going to crack open Psalms and get

tell us something we didn't know, dickstump

or

take it to the Nobody Cares forum, deep tissue dick massagers

or

Suckle on some sickle cells, douchebirthing scrote tickler.

But if it comes down to some actual smiting, my money’s on God. He’s apparently real old school in that regard.

[PSUFAN]

Q: What sort of God allows this horseshit to take place in his name

without smiting somebody?

A: Only a knock-kneed, weak, passive aggressive God could let that shit slip by.

WHO EXACTLY ARE YOU PRAYING TO?

[Tom In VA]

Who me ? I'm not praying anymore until I see how God vs. Mgo works out. Mgo served it up pretty harsh to God, probably like no man in the history of mankind has given it to God. I think he has a chance.

So I'm waiting. Guess you could say I'm in limbo.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

I'm not praying anymore until I see how God vs. Mgo works out.

Oh, it's coming fukko. You just wait.

[Tom In VA]

[Van]

Who's gonna play God?

I nominate Rog.

[mvscal]

Jesus and Satan fight over who gets to lick my ass crack while God gums my balls.

[Van]

Okay then, now I really nominate Rog.

[Tom In VA]

Who's gonna play God?

I nominate Rog.

You don't understand.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Who's gonna play God?

I hear G0D is looking for work these days.