How to elect a pope

[Derron]

This is the smoke we need to see.

I have heard that purple smoke was used in Vietnam to soften up areas for an LZ.

[Derron]

Start by eliminating all but the two or three that haven't molested little boys and go from there.

Russian roulette?

Hmmmm..

[Wolfman]

I guess we can shit can all the "is the Pope Italian" jokes once and for all. Now to work on all the pedophile jokes. I'm not Roman Catholic, but I hope they can clean up that rep. Let's see if Francis I is up to the task.The church does a lot of good in the world which tends to be overshadowed by the doings of the homosexual faction.

On the making fun side. I wonder what they do with the pope outfits made to fit other candidates. Maybe they send them to somewhere like they do with losers Championship gear?

[Smackie Chan]

Let's see if Francis I is up to the task.

He'll just need to lighten up.

[FLW Buckeye]

Let's see if Francis I is up to the task.

He'll just need to lighten up.

Rack!

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Now to work on all the pedophile jokes. I'm not Roman Catholic, but I hope they can clean up that rep.

Really, you hope some new Pope can come along and "clean up" that rep? Gee, I hope they can stop fucking little boys in the ass. That would be a good start. Then that whole reputation thingy would take care of itself, no? Or is that just asking too much? You see, it's nothing more than a simple two-step process:

1. See kid
2. Don't fuck kid

I sincerely wish all of you people would jump into a vat of acid then get swept into a floor drain.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

I sincerely wish all of you people would jump into a vat of acid then get swept mopped into a floor drain.

[Sirfindafold]

[War Wagon]

I'm amazed at the news coverage of this non-event.

Why would you be?

There are 1.2 billion Catholics, approx. 1/4 of the world, who identify as such.

The attention being paid to this bizarre occurrence is ridiculous. A bunch of sick, perverted, corrupt bastards are going to choose one from among them to do what? Wave from a balcony at a mass of brain-dead morons who pretend the guy has knowledge to impart to them?

For such a non-event, it's compelled you to impart your knowledge of the subject matter, slim as that may be.

Die in the center of a prayer circle, dumbfuck.

[Mikey]

I'm amazed at the news coverage of this non-event.

Why would you be?

There are 1.2 billion Catholics, approx. 1/4 of the world, who identify as such.

Doesn't come close to the importance of Bammer football, though.

[Mace]

I'd venture to say there are more 'Bama football fans than there are Catholics who give a shit about who might be named Pope or which Priest receives the annual Sandusky Award at the Vatican.

[jiminphilly]

Good signing by the Vatican. They get younger at a KEY position in their lineup.

[Smackie Chan]

Good signing by the Vatican. They get younger at a KEY position in their lineup.

And they shouldn't have to altar their defensive scheme, either.

[Mace]

Good signing by the Vatican. They get younger at a KEY position in their lineup.

And they shouldn't have to altar their defensive scheme, either.

Nope, they'll stick with their bend over and don't break defense.

[Van]

I'm not Roman Catholic, but I hope they can clean up that rep. Let's see if Francis I is up to the task.

He's just one man, and a 76-year-old man at that. What do you think he can possibly do during the scant few years he'll likely have the gig? Is he single-handedly supposed to eliminate pedophelia worldwide among his priests? That's like asking the president to eradicate spousal abuse or chronic depression.

The old feeb is just a figurehead. He can't reverse human psychology. The best you can hope for from the guy is that he'll set in motion policies that identify and punish rather than shelter criminals. He can't stop the behavior. He can stop sweeping it under the rug, is all.

[Mikey]

Is this sort of like all the liberal coons using guns to kill each other with?

Exactly

[Screw_Michigan]

I sincerely wish all of you people would jump into a vat of acid then get swept mopped into a floor drain.

You rang?

[BSmack]

Is he single-handedly supposed to eliminate pedophelia worldwide among his priests? That's like asking the president to eradicate spousal abuse or chronic depression.

Not exactly. It is more like asking the NFL Commissioner to stop his players from being thugs and wifebeaters.

Here's my three part plan for ending pedophilia in the RCC.

1. Promise that every last one of these perverts will be excommunicated. Period.
2. Promise that every last pervert priest will be turned over to the civil authorities. Period.

3. THEN FUCKING MAKE SURE YOU DO PARTS 1 & 2!!!

[Van]

Is he single-handedly supposed to eliminate pedophelia worldwide among his priests? That's like asking the president to eradicate spousal abuse or chronic depression.

Not exactly. It is more like asking the NFL Commissioner to stop his players from being thugs and wifebeaters.

Hardly. Merely asking priests to stop fucking boys would not be some new thing for a pope. Even the last gargoyle made it clear that he was solidly anti-altar-boy-rape.

No, the difference will center on what he does to find and punish those who do it.

Here's my three part plan for ending pedophilia in the RCC.

1. Promise that every last one of these perverts will be excommunicated. Period.
2. Promise that every last pervert priest will be turned over to the civil authorities. Period.

3. THEN FUCKING MAKE SURE YOU DO PARTS 1 & 2!!!

Agreed.

[R-Jack]

coons

guns

anals

Gooooooooooooo on.....................


sin,
Pikkkle

[R-Jack]

Hardly. Merely asking priests to stop fucking boys would not be some new thing for a pope. Even the last gargoyle made it clear that he was solidly anti-altar-boy-rape.

Would he say something else? Asking the pope to give his stance on boy rape is like "honey, does this dress make me look fat?", "does this oil drum of fried chicken and gravy in front of shutyomouth make him look fat?" and "does Paul write his own stuff?" all rolled into one.

[Mikey]

Francis Stepping Down

Why do we even care?

[mvscal]

And if any of you homos call him Francis...he'll kill ya.

[atomicdad]

[smackaholic]

There is a way to curb the amount of altar boy rape. Get rid of the ridiculous celibacy requirement for priests. Normal men want to have families. Going into the priesthood is a way for a fag to hide his fagotry. So, why is it any wonder that a fair percentage of priests are gay?

I think eventually, these idiotic standards will be changed. It will probably happen when the church finally realizes their season ticket sales will go up as a result.

[Left Seater]

I think eventually, these idiotic standards will be changed. It will probably happen when the church finally realizes their season ticket sales will go up as a result.

Exactly. There will also be a general increase in the roles of women in the church. It will start with a Priest in the deep south or southwest that gets married. The church will cry foul and excommunicate the priest. The folks of the parish will choose to stand with the priest and the local churchwill not be recognized by the larger church. However it will then lead to others following and if the larger church wants to retain any presence here they will be forced to change.

[mvscal]

I laughed.

[Mace]

Is he single-handedly supposed to eliminate pedophelia worldwide among his priests? That's like asking the president to eradicate spousal abuse or chronic depression.

Not exactly. It is more like asking the NFL Commissioner to stop his players from being thugs and wifebeaters.

Hardly. Merely asking priests to stop fucking boys would not be some new thing for a pope. Even the last gargoyle made it clear that he was solidly anti-altar-boy-rape.

No, the difference will center on what he does to find and punish those who do it.

Here's my three part plan for ending pedophilia in the RCC.

1. Promise that every last one of these perverts will be excommunicated. Period.
2. Promise that every last pervert priest will be turned over to the civil authorities. Period.

3. THEN FUCKING MAKE SURE YOU DO PARTS 1 & 2!!!

Agreed.

In addition to arresting/prosecuting the offending Priests, they need to do the same with anyone, including the Pope, who, in any way, attempts to cover up the crimes. Until that happens, it's just lip service and they can go fuck themselves.

[Derron]

In addition to arresting/prosecuting the offending Priests, they need to do the same with anyone, including the Pope, who, in any way, attempts to cover up the crimes. Until that happens, it's just lip service and they can go fuck themselves.

Better watch your ass now. Wags reads that shit and he will be coming to fuck you up.

[smackaholic]

Whether I could marry or not, if I were to become a priest, I wouldn't bang a male. If I were to "falter", it would be with a nun.

You really aren't that bright, are you, Sam?

My point is that since they can't marry, normal men, the type that would rather bang a nun, do not go int the priesthood. Closet homos, OTOH flock there, since not marrying isn't a problem and being a priest gives them cover for never marrying. Allowing them to marry will mean your recruiting base suddenly includes many people who don't have a thing for altar boy ass.

[Mace]

In addition to arresting/prosecuting the offending Priests, they need to do the same with anyone, including the Pope, who, in any way, attempts to cover up the crimes. Until that happens, it's just lip service and they can go fuck themselves.

Better watch your ass now. Wags reads that shit and he will be coming to fuck you up.

I wish him luck with that.

[Derron]

With this pope dude only having one lung, should there not be a pool as to how long he goes ? Was there not a pope who died fairly soon after being corenated or what ever ?

Old one lung dude down the road from me burned 3 packs a day, drank till he stumbled every night, and made it to 78 with one lung for 30 some years.

[BSmack]

Whether I could marry or not, if I were to become a priest, I wouldn't bang a male. If I were to "falter", it would be with a nun.

You really aren't that bright, are you, Sam?

My point is that since they can't marry, normal men, the type that would rather bang a nun, do not go int the priesthood. Closet homos, OTOH flock there, since not marrying isn't a problem and being a priest gives them cover for never marrying. Allowing them to marry will mean your recruiting base suddenly includes many people who don't have a thing for altar boy ass.

Better yet, people could stop believing fairy tales about virgin birth, transubstantiation and resurrection. Then the filthy pedos have no power at all.

[smackaholic]

With this pope dude only having one lung, should there not be a pool as to how long he goes ? Was there not a pope who died fairly soon after being corenated or what ever ?

Old one lung dude down the road from me burned 3 packs a day, drank till he stumbled every night, and made it to 78 with one lung for 30 some years.

that would be JP the first. Dude lasted about 15 minutes. They were so worried about a repeat, they went and chose that wet behind the ears pollack, JP the second. It was a good pick, dude was as durable as brett fav-ruh. No way an 80 year old could have played 9mm sponge like he did and live to tell about it.

[Roger_the_Shrubber]

Cardinal Sicola never gets a vote.

It's a shame, cause wouldn't the entire world love a good Pope Sicola?

Refreshing!