Expense report hell

[smackaholic]

And my expense report hell just got even deeper.

I have a corporate Amex. I am instructed to put all expenses on it, when possible. I used to cheat a little and use my person IHG mastercard,to get the extra points on hotel stays, but have had my pee-pee slapped for doing so, so now, it is amex, exclusively. I had been keeping all receipts for this. Most are airport parking and gas. These receipts, as you know are frequently about as readable as a 3 AM AP post. Last month I realized that I could get a single, legible list of these expenses from my Amex statement. So, I did just that. Turned in a months worth and they sailed right past my manager no problem, other than he requested the actual receipts for hotel stays. No problem, I figured as it is a good way to ensure a $220 hotel receipt isn't $79 for the room and $141 for movies/room service.

Anyhoo, I decided to stop keeping gas/parking receipts if I could put them on the Amex. And last night I get an email from a corporate bean counter saying that the amex receipt is not sufficient. Fortunately, on the amex site, you can click on a line and get a fair bit more detail on a payment. The gas receipt will actually say it was for fuel and not snickers bars or beer. Hopefully this will fly with them. If not, I could eat a few hundred dollars worth of parking/gas. And that would suck.

Damn, I really do love working for a large corporation. You try to do something that streamlines a process and still gives them the ability to verify an expense and they don't want to hear about it. 5 minutes later you get an email instructing you to view a 6 Sigma company powerpoint. They need to jam 6 Sigma up their ass sideways.

I really do believe that the bottom line here is they know that most employees do expense reporting on their own time and therefore, it's not high on their list of things to give a shit about. Maybe I should go back to regular receipts, max out my personal card use for points and just blackout the line that has credit card type/number as it is my personal info and not any of their fukking business.

[BSmack]

Hey, I just did like my 20th training in writing SMART goals. I feel better already.

[Screw_Michigan]

Suckaholic, just turn in your god damn receipts. Why is this so difficult?

[Left Seater]

Holic.

Snap a photo of the receipt with your smart phone. Then one day at work email the photos to your work email and then print said photo.

Two advantages here. One you don't have to keep track of the paper copy and two it puts each receipt on one sheet of paper and makes your expense report super large and then the bean counters have to deal with an ass load of paper.

[Moving Sale]

I put my receipts in a shoe box and have my son help me sort them on April 14. Ok who am I trying to kid? We do it on the 15th.

[Dinsdale]

Damn, Holic... you mean the company wants you to use the company card, and turn in receipts?

Ohhhh, the humanity. That's unheard of. Except to anyone who has ever turned in expenses.

BTW -- I believe the major hotel chains will... get this... email you your freaking receipt. Also, if you stay at the same major chain every time, you rack up all the "points," which will typically go under your name, not the company's (I think KCScott has mastered the art). Heck,last summer, we occasionally got the free upgrade to a suite (seemed to happen more checking in on a Friday or Saturday, rather than a Sunday or Monday, when the working stiffs show up). Some of those suites were bigger and infinitely nicer than some places I've lived.

Speaking of such things -- hard to beat that yummy hotel "hot breakfast." But I did learn that if you work until the wee hours, then go back to the hotel and start drinking like a banshee... that a lot of people get really judgey when you show up in the lobby at 6AM staggering drunk and start throwing down on shitty bacon and eggs.

[Dinsdale]

I put my receipts in a shoe box and have my son help me sort them on April 14. Ok who am I trying to kid? We do it on the 15th.

You have a kid to help you?

That makes your accounting system approximately 100% more efficient than mine.

[smackaholic]

Suckaholic, just turn in your god damn receipts. Why is this so difficult?

Can you fukking read? I have been doing that, including the horrible airport receipts that aer near impossible to read at times. I recently decides, hey, amex was nice enough to put them in a readable list, let me use that.

So, I did. Sailed right by the manager, no problem. Then it got to some poor fukking bean counter who wants me to go back and get all the receipts, some of which chucked, some I just didnt bother getting. "scuse the fukk out of me for actually attempting to make a process simpler and easier, just like the 6S nazis want.