Fire Again...

[Dinsdale]

Exception? No, an exception would be you knowing what the fuck you're talking about.

http://www.orww.org/Wildfires/index.htm

Huh?


So, your saying that the largest, most damaging fores occur in the maritime climate zone forests, where large trees grow with reckless abandon, and on the occasional years where weather conditions are ripe for it, it can result in huge fires?


Color me SHOCKED. I never knew that.


Oh, wait.

Yeah, we get some bigazz forest fires... every few years. Probably has something to do with the massive forests resulting in massive forest fires if the weather patterns create the conditions.


But here's the catch, douche... massive forest fires aren't really all that common an occurance around here. The only way they really start is at the end of an exceptionally hot, dry summer.

And you know why that is? Because Western Oregon (where every fire in your link has been) isn't arid or semi-arid, although it takes on the characteristics of such a climate zone for a few months out of the year. But again -- huge fires on the West Side (aka Wet Side) aren't terribly common, considering the amount of standing timber in the region.


Now, ON THE OTHER HAND, once you go east of the Cascades, arid and semi-arid climates are the norm... which, oh-so oddly enough, is where the term "desert" comes from. In what is known as the "Dryside" of the state, wildfires (different from "forest fires") are EXTREMELY common -- to the point it's a damn fine idea to check on fire reports before trying to drive to the Dryside in late summer, since there's always a good chance your highway of choice may be closed.

EXTREMELY common occurance "over there"... in the desert.


But keep it up... you're freaking killing me over here. Humorous shit. Actually, "there's no fires in the desert" is pretty much knee-slapping funny shit.... which you've tried (horribly unsuccessfully, if you didn't notice) to counter by changing the definition of "desert." Classic.

[Mikey]

[web]http://sat.wrh.noaa.gov/satellite/loops ... vis&size=1[/web]

[Dinsdale]

No, the stretch would be equating a small brush fire which burns out very quickly with a wildfire.

Woe... talk about dismissing yourself from any intelligent conversation...

Just wow.


Uhm... how may acres do you think the Alvord Desert covers?

Here's a hint, tard -- the High Desert Province is 7.8 million acres. That's but a small portion of the desert areas of the Dryside.

On that note -- how big do you think the Great Basin is? Covers a large portion of the Lower 48, maybe?





Tell you what, mv... I'll do you a little favor...


Educate yourself, tard.

[Mikey]

Smoke seems to be getting a little closer. I think I'll have to drive up the street again...

[Dinsdale]

Is that some sort of columnar ornamental redwood in your pic, Mikey?

If so, that's a fairly beastly columnar. We do some columnar cedars that get pretty huge around here, and some fruit columnars (and you don't want no part of a 1-pound pear dropping from 75 feet... sin, my buddy's house, before that god-forsaken tree got cut down).


I'm kind of a fan of columnar ornamental cultivars, although I like native strains better... of course. But size limitations can come into play in residential landscaping.


Anyhoo... cool tree.

[Dinsdale]

mvscal, a question for you...

What will it take to get you to continue posting on this subject?

Cash?

Sig priviledges?


The reason I ask, is because it's quite Kansas City-esque.

You've gone from "there are no wildfires in the desert," the when proven wrong, you've both attempted to unilaterally change the definition of "desert," then when that failed (miserably), you modified your statements to "well, when I said fires never start in the desert, what I actually meant was 'well... the WHOLE desert doesn't catch fire at the same time.' "


This is kind of like a combination of a really cheesey daytime soap opera and an AM radio talk show.


Outstanding.

[Dinsdale]

You are the fucktard who doesn't know what a wildfire is. You demonstrate that every time you click submit.

Ohhhh.

I get it. You got your dietary fiber intake by way of a second bowl of LSD Flakes this morning.

That explains a lot.

Like how discussing whether USC's run defense is up to the challenge of stopping Oregon's monsterous running game somehow demonstrates that I don't know what a "wildfire" is... outstnding use of logic.


Dang, I might have to start drinking and smoking early, since this staging of the Nonsequitur Olympics could be fairly entertaining if I was as wasted as you obviously are.

[Mikey]

That's an Italian Cypress. Fairly commonly used to line driveways around here.

I think I need to go pack up...

[Dinsdale]

There'ygo(one word, two syllables... it's a U&Lism)...


cypress was what I was seaching for. Same general "smell" as a redwood, but not the same.

I think I need to go pack up...

That bad, eh?

Good luck. I hope the ashes don't clog the pool filter, or anything horrible like that.


I might need to pack up myself. The folks from the Guinness Book are rushing out to make a determination as to whether this is the "most beautiful fall day in human history," so I might have to cease with this internet banter combined with not-particularly well-diguised psiedo-productivity, and go play some disc golf.

Chasing a piece of plastic around the park sound pretty deece. But it's the beginning of the Wet Season, so I doubt any discarded butts or roaches will have much of a risk of causing any urban wildfires, which are a big issue around here, although almost always very small in scope.


Then again -- my disc golfing buddy might bring his chihuahua along, which carries substantial risk of flaming wherever he/it goes.

[PSUFAN]

Dins, are you an epic disc golfer player? Don't you ever just say "fuck it" and go cruise parking lots for skanks to nail in the pooper - oh, say around the 3rd "hole" or so?

[Mikey]

I think I need to go pack up...

That bad, eh?

Not quite that bad...yet. There's an evacuation been called in town about 5 or 6 miles from here, but we could be in the line of fire depending on the wind. Not that much brush around here though, most of the homeowners are pretty good about following the mandatory brush clearing rules.

I've been moving all the important files, several CPUs and valuable family heirlooms into the garage, staging for a quick getaway. I've got some heavy stuff already in the pickup. Unfortunately I don't think I'll be able to take the 1884 Seth Thomas Regulator. It's at least a 2 person carry and takes up too much space.

[Dinsdale]

Dins, are you an epic disc golfer player?

Dude... I'm 40. The days of 350 foot drives are now a distant memory. That era has succumbed to the Era of Sore Shoulder.


Met some smokin hot hotties on the course the other day.


No, they didn't schlarve me :sadface:

[Nishlord]

Good luck, Cal chaps. Even the cunty ones.

[Mike the Lab Rat]

Dins, are you an epic disc golfer player?

Hey, hey, hey....don't make fun of disc golf.

It's one hell of a way to kill some beer and an afternoon.

[Ace]

I'm waiting for the first tard to blame this on global warming and completely disregarding the fact that these fires should be burning because they are part of the lifecycle. In fact, if it werent for fire retardation programs, they would (and should) be happening more frequently

[BSmack]

Dins, are you an epic disc golfer player?

Hey, hey, hey....don't make fun of disc golf.

It's one hell of a way to kill some beer and an afternoon.

Wouldn't you just love to see Dins and Skeeter paired together at GNIFDTAS?

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

In order to burn effectively, the wildfire needs to keep its Acreage Per Carry down to a minimum. In a nutshell, the wildfire needs to burn things efficiently, not successfully.

[RadioFan]

In order to burn effectively, the wildfire needs to keep its Acreage Per Carry down to a minimum. In a nutshell, the wildfire needs to burn things efficiently, not successfully.

RumpleForskin's from Calif.? Who knew?

[smackaholic]

yet another good reason to make atleast part of your crib subterranean. it might actually survive the wildbrushscrubforest fires. Ofcourse, you'll be doubly fukked this winter when the whole place washes away.

think i'll just be content here with my summer humidity and miserable cold slushy shitty winters.

[smackaholic]

speaking of fire hazards we do have one here in the U&R. It's called braindead OL that leaves 49 candles burning on a daily basis, usually directly below something flammable.

why is it that women don't understand the whole heat rises deal?

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

RumpleForskin's from Calif.? Who knew?

I don't know about Foreskin, but technically, his wife was born in every state.

[socal]

(which obviously doesn't apply to the southwestern corner of california)

That would be the D & L.

Amateurs.

[Laxplayer]

Hey PSU....I just sent you a few pics of the fires near my house. The first two are from across the street from me and the last one is from a friends backyard.

[socal]

Map of fires in so Cal.

[Mikey]

So, we've been under a mandatory evacuation since about 3:00.

Still here though, like most of the neighborhood.
The fire is at least 4 or 5 miles from here and, barring a sudden wind shift, won't even come close.
Lots of smoke though. I'm thinking about getting a few pork butts and just leaving them in the back yard
if we have to take off. When I come back I can just drop them into a crock pot with some of IndyFrisco's
sauce. Wildfire party!!

The truck is still loaded and pointed down the driveway,
and we will be up all night watching things.
I decided it would be safe, though, to pull my laptop out of the truck
and do some pron surfing to pass the time.

[Mikey]

Here are the San Diego Area Fires...

This Google thingy is pretty cool.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Good luck Mikey. Better to be safe than sorry.

Kiss of Death. Evacuate NOW.

[War Wagon]

So, we've been under a mandatory evacuation since about 3:00.

Katrina victims were also under mandatory evacuation orders, but did they listen?

Have fun living out of your pickup truck on the Interstate bridge.

[Mikey]

I wonder if there's room for three refugees in my daughter's dorm in Irvine.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

JSC's got an extra bed you can stay in.

[Mikey]

So, we've been under a mandatory evacuation since about 3:00.

Katrina victims were also under mandatory evacuation orders, but did they listen?

Have fun living out of your pickup truck on the Interstate bridge.

I've already got some Heinies, so I'm cool.

[Mikey]

News flash for the local News hacks:

We don't fucking care that LT, Trevor, Bruce Bochy and Tony Gwynn had to evacuate their homes. We really don't fucking care. Just tell me exactly where this fucking fire is right now instead, OK?

[socal]

In order to burn effectively, the wildfire needs to keep its Acreage Per Carry down to a minimum. In a nutshell, the wildfire needs to burn things efficiently, not successfully.

I was thinking about leaving manzanita on the bench this week in favor of joshua tree during dead pine's bye week. But then I thought, fuck it, we're due for a good Santa Ana wind this year.

Bode.

[socal]

News flash for the local News hacks:

We don't fucking care that LT, Trevor, Bruce Bochy and Tony Gwynn had to evacuate their homes. We really don't fucking care. Just tell me exactly where this fucking fire is right now instead, OK?

I, too, am awestruck by the sheer dumbfuckedness ('sup mvscal) in local news tonight.

[War Wagon]

News flash for the local News hacks:

We don't fucking care that LT, Trevor, Bruce Bochy and Tony Gwynn had to evacuate their homes. We really don't fucking care. Just tell me exactly where this fucking fire is right now instead, OK?

Yeah, but where's Marty?

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

When you look at the wildfire, the wildfire is very gifted in the art of destruction. If you go to California or any mexican country, they can turn a field into a mound of ash.

[socal]

This wildfire technology nowadays is leaps and bounds ahead of its hippie, blunt-burning brethren from 20 or 30 years ago.

Just ask Mikey.

[Jerkovich]

Good luck Mikey, seems like you'll need it.

Dimsdale, stick to square head deck screws, you'll fair much better, ya fucking twit.

[Ana Ng]

I haven't received any evacuation notices as of yet, but I don't feel like waking up all "Johnny Cash" and shit, so I may just stay up tonight.

I wonder if Raydah James has any room for us at his home on the marsh.

[Qbert]

^^^^^^

i'm quite SURE that Mikey will be quick to come over to the RJ House!

RACK!

good luck to all that are involved in the Fires.