New guy

StrandedTexan · Post by **StrandedTexan** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:38 am

Living in Napa, CA...born in Fort Worth, TX. How the hell?!? Check the link in my sig.

Graduated from Texas Tech (psychology), HUGE University of Texas fan. How the hell?!? Went to TTU, then North Texas, then UT @ Arlington, then UT (2 years), then back to TTU to graduate. WTF?? When I went to TTU we hated Texas A&M and UT was an asswhippin' waiting to happen. Never thought TTU would be a force, Spike Dykes was not that great a coach. So, I tracked the University of Texas as "my team". More to it, but...

I hate OU! Adrian Peterson is the Anti-Christ (Texan traitor)...believing in his Heisman hype will bring Armageddon (for you religious folks).

NCAA football thoughts: I hope West Virginia goes undefeated, only to be snubbed by a one loss Texas team for the National Title game, because it serves em right. I hope the Pac-10 gets stomped in every out of conference game it schedules, because the whole conference (minus USC) is a bunch of cunts. I wish the SEC would find some offense, because defense does NOT always win championships. I wish the Big 12 North had balls...any balls. I wish the Big 10, with 11 teams, would add Notre Dame so they could have a championship game and become a legitimate conference.

I have been reading these boards for a while, but never posted. Figured, "Why not". Maybe I'll never post again, but hopefully I'll find a home.

PrimeX · Post by **PrimeX** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:43 am

You found the link to our home, how?

StrandedTexan · Post by **StrandedTexan** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:55 am

Friend turned me onto it about a year ago. So I started casually watching... The more I read, the more I thought "This is a good board". I am not a post whore, but there seem to be some great thoughts exchanged here. Again, I figured"Why not".

Sky · Post by **Sky** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:55 am

Well don't come in here and give a "hello" post and then say you may never post again. Shit or get off the pot man. Course, we could use some new blood in here so the more the merrier.

orcinus · Post by **orcinus** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:01 am

StrandedTexan wrote:I hate OU!

Welcome, Dick.

PrimeX is our official UT greeter, and I'm sure you girls will get to know each other better over a double mocha latte and visit to Prime's favorite day spa.

Just don't let him talk you into entering any contests on "other" boards.

Mortal lock, he is.

Oh, and one more thing ... don't touch the tube socks.

Nobody touches the tube socks.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:08 am

YES!!!! StrandedTexan!! You shameless goat fucker, you finally sacked up and posted!!

Oh, and btw...

I hope the Pac-10 gets stomped in every out of conference game it schedules, because the whole conference (minus USC) is a bunch of cunts.

...Correct me if I'm wrong but didn't the Pac 10 go 4-0 against the Big 12 today? Why, lookee here...

USC: 28
Nebraska: 10

Oregon: 34
Oklahoma: 33

Washington State: 17
Baylor: 15

Arizona State: 21
Colorado: 3

Hmm...Yes indeedy, I think they did!

:-)

M2 · Post by M2 » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:12 am

I wonder whose troll this is?

I have an idea...

Since my place is about 15 minutes drive from Napa, I'm sure I could stump this troll real quick.

I think I'll let it ride for a bit.

Jimmy Medalions · Post by **Jimmy Medalions** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:18 am

m2 wrote:I wonder whose troll this is?

I can't wait to see San Francisco vs. Napa picture flamewars.

StrandedTexan · Post by **StrandedTexan** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:31 am

Give the Pac-10 props this week...they finally showed up. But they schedule out of conference because they have to. Otherwise, USC beats Arizona, Arizona State, Washington, State, Oregon, State, UCLA, etc counts for nothing.

LSU: 45
Arizona: 3

Tenn: 35
Cal: 18

OK: 37
Wash: 20

Auburn: 40
Wash State: 14

Boise State: 42
Oregon State: 14

I am not going to count Stanford (0-3). They are the Big 12's Baylor.

Didn't work so well so far...

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:31 am

m2, nope, he's no troll.

He's a dude I've mentioned quite frequently here on this board. On more than a few occasions, especially during the run up to the Rose Bowl last year, I mentioned "my Texas buddy at work". This dude is that dude. All day long at wrok we entertain ourselves by arguing college football, potential animal fight matchups and Somalian pirate attacks on U.S. warships. It's how we keep our sanity.

Yep, he's a co-worker of mine, and he's been reading this board over my shoulder at work for about a year now and I've been bugging him to get the fuck in here already and start posting.

Looks like he finally put down his Saturday night drunken whore-a-rama and decided to sack up and post.

If you really wanna get on his good side go ahead and harp on him about how he graduated from (and even was on the track team at) Taco Tech yet he's front running like a big dog now by dumping his alma mater in favor of the much-better-at-football-of-course 'Horns.

He just loves that shit.

Nah, he's no troll. He's a dyed in the wool transplanted Texan who saw his first ever pink car a couple of months ago rolling down the street in front of our shop. This incident combined with Cal's performance at Tennessee confirmed his deepest and most lurid suspicions that California is populated almost exlusively by freaks and pussies.

M2 · Post by M2 » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:36 am

Jimmy Medalions wrote:
m2 wrote:I wonder whose troll this is?
I can't wait to see San Francisco vs. Napa picture flamewars.

18 point win... against the big 12 north?

We'll see s. CAL in la, Nov. 18th.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:41 am

StrandedTexan wrote:Give the Pac-10 props this week...they finally showed up. But they schedule out of conference because they have to. Otherwise, USC beats Arizona, Arizona State, Washington, State, Oregon, State, UCLA, etc counts for nothing.

LSU: 45
Arizona: 3

Tenn: 35
Cal: 18

OK: 37
Wash: 20

Auburn: 40
Wash State: 14

Boise State: 42
Oregon State: 14

I am not going to count Stanford (0-3). They are the Big 12's Baylor.

Didn't work so well so far...

Notice the common denominator there, and then again this week?

All away teams. (Except for Washington, who's a doormat.) All losses.

Today, it was all home teams, and all wins.

Also, lest we forget...

Nebraska's OOC schedule includes La Tech, Nicholls State and Troy.

YOUR OOC conference schedule includes N. Texas, Rice and Division 1-AA Sam Fuck Me In The Goat Ass State.

Each of you scheduled one other OOC game, against real teams, unfortunately, and you lost both those games.

Taco Tech lost OOC to the Horney Frogs.

Then there's A&M, which nearly lost in the state of Texas just now to...Army!!

Vince is gone. Mack Brown's still there. OU can't defend...at all. Nebraska hasn't beaten a highly ranked opponent on the road in nine years. Colorado would get roasted by Rutgers.

In other words, the Big XII may now go back to being...what, exactly??

M2 · Post by M2 » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:43 am

So Van, a guy that works with you... lives in Napa??? Yet works in Sactown???

Yeah.

If it were the other way around... maybe, just maybe.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:45 am

m2 wrote:
Jimmy Medalions wrote:
m2 wrote:I wonder whose troll this is?
I can't wait to see San Francisco vs. Napa picture flamewars.

18 point win... against the big 12 north?

We'll see s. CAL in la, Nov. 18th.

m2, you do realize don't you that L.A. is not in Berkeley? Ergo, it's not a home game for Cal. Thusly and forthwith, Cal will again be forced to board that plane for yet another Important Roadie just the way Cal always boards such planes; whimpering, defeated and uttely absent anything resembling hairy bean bags.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:48 am

m2 wrote:So Van, a guy that works with you... lives in Napa??? Yet works in Sactown???

Yeah.

If it were the other way around... maybe, just maybe.

We don't work in Sactown. We both commute.

m2, you know me well enough to know that I don't troll. Never have, never will. Not once. No exceptions. My word is all the proof you'll ever need, and you know it.

M2 · Post by M2 » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:58 am

Van wrote:
m2 wrote:
Jimmy Medalions wrote: I can't wait to see San Francisco vs. Napa picture flamewars.

18 point win... against the big 12 north?

We'll see s. CAL in la, Nov. 18th.
m2, you do realize don't you that L.A. is not in Berkeley?

Is that the same place where Nebraska... the team that will end up second to Colorado.

Went on the road and only lost by a couple of td's???

Yeah, I know that place...

This time, we won't just triple our offensive yards against you... we'll finish it.

If we win... would you never post here again?(this is for the people that you give headaches too).

You in?

StrandedTexan · Post by **StrandedTexan** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:01 am

Well it took about, well, 10 minutes, to make Van and I "friends". Yes, he turned me onto this board. Are we friends? I think so, yes. But we are competitors, I hate him and respect him. I thought I had him beat and ready to quit a couple of times, but he persists. I figured this would come up later, but I am no troll. I just figured I'd post myself, rather than telling Van what my thoughts were.

I can almost see myself going apeshit here...Doh!

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:21 am

m2 wrote:If we win... would you never post here again?

Sure, provided the same holds true for you if USC wins.

You still in?

Btw, USC won by 18 points and if they needed it they easily could've scored on their last drive to make it a 25 point win.

The point spread was 18 1/2. USC won by 18. So, why do you keep bringing up this stupid point that USC "only won by 18"?

That's exactly what was supposed to happen. It was a comfortable but sloppy win for USC, which is about where their superior talent level combined with their inexperience says they should be vis a vis Nebraska at such an early point in the season.

Harvdog · Post by **Harvdog** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 12:27 pm

StrandedTexan wrote:Well it took about, well, 10 minutes, to make Van and I "friends". Yes, he turned me onto this board. Are we friends? I think so, yes. But we are competitors, I hate him and respect him. I thought I had him beat and ready to quit a couple of times, but he persists. I figured this would come up later, but I am no troll. I just figured I'd post myself, rather than telling Van what my thoughts were.

I can almost see myself going apeshit here...Doh!

So how was Van at work after the rose Bowl? :wink:

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 5:39 pm

None too pleased, obviously, but surprisingly okay with it all since it was such a great game, we had a great shot at it and all good things must come to an end eventually...

It wasn't a situation where I was throwing my food at the tv, let's put it that way.

:-)

The next day at work I remember my one main gripe being that the media were all annointing VY the new Christ and they were all saying he won the game single handedly and I kept saying that Texas' offensive line was getting the shaft there because they were fantastic and nobody was giving them their due...

"If VY had to play that game behind A&M's O line he would've gotten pounded and we would've discovered that no, no one player ever wins a game single handedly." I remember saying that, a lot.

I was mainly bitter over our unforced errors, and Pete's uncharacteristic decision to go into Prevent Offense-Defense mode once we were up by 12 with six minutes to go. ST will verify that I was very forthcoming with praise for Mack and that I couldn't believe it but yep, Pete got outcoached by the last guy I ever thought possible...

ST didn't say much. He didn't have to. His team won. He sorta just let me vent as he sat there listening with a smug, lopsided smirk...

StrandedTexan · Post by **StrandedTexan** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:00 pm

Harvdog wrote:So how was Van at work after the rose Bowl? :wink:

Quiet, very quiet... Calm before the storm. The victory speeches and trash talking eventually came, but for the first hour or two it was nothing but static.

We actually argued for about a hour last week over the game. He STILL can't wrap his head around USC getting beat by a better team! :P

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:04 pm

We actually argued for about a hour last week over the game.

It was slower than Alabama Fuck last week, what else was there to do??

There you were, literally sprawled out and laying flat atop the Gold Wing, and we're debating who's bigger, polar bears or Kodiak bears...

Arguing 'bout the game? T'were the least we could do...

StrandedTexan · Post by **StrandedTexan** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:20 pm

Van wrote:None too pleased, obviously, but surprisingly okay with it all since it was such a great game, we had a great shot at it and all good things must come to an end eventually...

Wow, m'kay, very regal view there. Almost making me cry.

Van wrote:The next day at work I remember my one main gripe being that the media were all annointing VY the new Christ and they were all saying he won the game single handedly and I kept saying that Texas' offensive line was getting the shaft there because they were fantastic and nobody was giving them their due...

"If VY had to play that game behind A&M's O line he would've gotten pounded and we would've discovered that no, no one player ever wins a game single handedly." I remember saying that, a lot.

I was mainly bitter over our unforced errors, and Pete's uncharacteristic decision to go into Prevent Offense-Defense mode once we were up by 12 with six minutes to go. ST will verify that I was very forthcoming with praise for Mack and that I couldn't believe it but yep, Pete got outcoached by the last guy I ever thought possible...

ST didn't say much. He didn't have to. His team won. He sorta just let me vent as he sat there listening with a smug, lopsided smirk...

Fact, fact, fact, fact. I think it was the day after the Day After that we found any disagreement over the game. I don't 100% recall, but it was probably our eternal offense vs defense debate that ended our praise/praise discourse.

StrandedTexan · Post by **StrandedTexan** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:24 pm

Actually, we found out that polar bears are larger. Kodiak bears are taller, some reaching 15', but polar bears, on average, weigh more by about 400 lbs. I was surprised. I always thought the Kodiak brown bear was the largest land animal in the western hemisphere.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:26 pm

Believe the Heupel wrote:The question doesn't really have any merit.

Kodiak bears are actually Browns. Brown bears have a much greater variance of size than Polar bears. Kodiaks tend a bit larger than Polar bears, but a lot of that has to do with diet.

Polar bears range up to about a metric ton. Kodiaks range up to about 1.7 metric ton-but those are outliers.

Don't make me go google on your ass too!

See, we spent the better part of about two hours googling this shit and now I know my Big Bears Minutiae like nobody's bid'ness.

(We were debating which was bigger, in the absolute, not just on average. We were doing the Animal Fights Challenge, where we pitted rhinos against hippos and bears against tigers and lemurs against furry marmosets and such. The consensus among all the various "expert" sites we found seemed to be that polar bears were considered slightly larger than Kodiaks on average and also at the extreme, but that it was so close as to be difficult to pin down with any degree of certainty...)

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:26 pm

Great. The board just got even more dorkified.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:28 pm

ST wrote:it was probably our eternal offense vs defense debate that ended our praise/praise discourse.

Which, when you think about it, is really kinda stupid since both D's got rolled like $1.50 hookers on that day.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:32 pm

MgoBlue-LightSpecial wrote:Great. The board just got even more dorkified.

Dude lives on a motorcycle and would probably laugh out loud at the vey notion of The Flaming Lips being taken seriously by anything with a penis so no, unless and until you bring your little brother in here the board remains static.

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:37 pm

Dude lives on a motorcycle

Which has to do with what, exactly?

You see, statements like that are what contribute to your label as a dork. You know that, right?

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:44 pm

Your testicularly challenged aversion to something as scary as a motorcycle combined with your love of Alternative Fag Chic is what cements your label as a dork, capice?

(Btw, check your PM...)

MgoBlue-LightSpecial · Sun Sep 17, 2006 7:04 pm

Ahh yes, the dreaded "I know you are but what am I" tactic. Always a winner.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 7:15 pm

Actually, I changed it up and provided clarifying definitions so no, it's not at all a case of "IKYABWAI?". See, the very notion of a guy with your stated interests and phobias calling anybody a "dork" is just sorta specious and downright myopic.

Basically, unless you're squaring off against JTR you might just wanna eject that particular Smack Bullet.

Now, your "borrowing" of Dins' favored (and very tired) tactic against me, yep, that's a winner.

Also, thanks for the "pick 'em" info.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 8:34 pm

Oh Vannie...I'm nuetral here, but c'mon --

Obviously, the only thing we have to go by here are the posts attributed to the given poster.

And on this matter, I hate to break it to you, bud...

But you're probably running away with the "Biggest fucking DORK on T1B" crown. I think your only competetion comes from Terry in Douchechester and Rack Fu...the other guys who can't get to the submit button fast enough to proclaim their status as card-carrying dorks.

You really DO come across as a major fucking dork, dude...sorry for the reality.

socal · Post by **socal** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 8:40 pm

Welcome, ST. Let it be known that I'm one of those exlusive Californians but I'm decidedly hetero with a black vehicle, a marbled bean bag, and a team whose mascot doesn't chafe or become engorged at the sight of white horses.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 9:14 pm

Dins, as long as you of all people keep hanging onto that stupid "dork" card of yours it'll remain a non issue.

"Reality", as defined by...you?? Badge of honor stuff, actually.

No worries.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 9:18 pm

socal wrote:Welcome, ST. Let it be known that I'm one of those exlusive Californians but I'm decidedly hetero with a black vehicle, a marbled bean bag, and a team whose mascot doesn't chafe or become engorged at the sight of white horses.

No, at the sight of white horses your mascot just goes French soldier at the sight of a German.

socal · Post by **socal** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 11:12 pm

Van wrote:
socal wrote:Welcome, ST. Let it be known that I'm one of those exlusive Californians but I'm decidedly hetero with a black vehicle, a marbled bean bag, and a team whose mascot doesn't chafe or become engorged at the sight of white horses.
No, at the sight of white horses your mascot just goes French soldier at the sight of a German.

Nice wrok.

And why does it not surprise me that you and ST spend your idle work hours arguing over who's bigger?

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 11:39 pm

Socal, like prison guards or nuclear power plant operators we spend our far too many idle hours arguing everything we can, just to stay awake.

Case in point:

Different guy, but we used to do this one stupid Boredom Game where we'd start with the number 1 and the object was to name players from any sport who wore the number 1. You'd take turns back and forth until somebody got to say, "I'm the king of the 1s!" and then we'd move on to the next number.

That was actually a really funny game. You wouldn't think so but you'd be on a more difficult number number like 2 and after hitting 'em with "Deion Sanders, at FSU!" I'd have to burp up "Freddy Patek!" and we'd all just bust up and I'd get the Wayne's World "We're not worthy!" gesture...

Being a bit of a Rainman/savant that was one game I never lost.

Truly stupid game but it could literally kill an hour or two and it was always a great trip down Nostalgia Lane so it ruled.

ST won't do that game so instead we go over various "Jihad!" scenarios in the middle east that'd lead to the most ass kicking Israeli response...or he lays out his definitions of various Relationship Strata with Mexican women he's shat on...or maybe it'll be a debate about the best places to get red beans and rice.

Whatever works.

socal · Post by **socal** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 11:52 pm

Van,

You need a kid. Badly.

And BTW Mgo just shot his dork wad all over his keyboard.

Van · Post by **Van** » Sun Sep 17, 2006 11:59 pm

His keyboard was already well crusted over from the dork wad he shoots whenever he downloads the latest Flaming Lips ditty.

As for my ever wanting a kid, well, I pretty much subscribe to the Al Czervik philosphy.

Anyway, if you have enought time to kill and you're stuck in one room with some dude you're eventually going to get around to talking about old Earl Campbell MNF memories once you've finally exhaused all the Salma Hayek vs Monica Belluci "who would you do?" time wasters.

Unfortunately for us, unlike you we don't have teenage girls to dupe and teeange boys to invite home for after school one on one study as a means of killing time during our work day.

:-)

New guy

New guy

Re: New guy